Chapter 18: Revenge Served Hot

Ukyo let out a sigh as the school day ended. Hibari had been giving Ukyo the cold shoulder after finding out about the whole revenge plan yesterday. Ukyo had tried to assure her it was for both their sakes, but the blonde refused to listen to reason. The chef was frustrated and wanted to vent. The boxing club should have punching bags that would be good for that.

"So... You're an old acquaintance of Saotome-kun's?" an auburn haired girl asked as she slid up to Ukyo in the hallway. Ukyo vaguely recognised her from class.

"What of it?"

Ukyo took a moment to study the girl's companions. The tall heavily redhead was a bit intimidating. The other two girls seemed fairly harmless (if scheming). Also maybe a little close with one another for just friends.

"The name is Hanazono Kaori... and I was hoping you could answer a little question of ours," Kaori stated. She then produced two photos and handed them to Ukyo.

The one photo showed a handsome black haired boy with a pigtail wearing a silk Chinese shirt. His eyes shawn the same cocky blue Ukyo remember from Ranma. The second photo showed a very cute red haired girl with the same hairstyle and shirt. Her eyes too shawn the same glimmer. If Ukyo didn't know better from the eyes and attitude displayed they would seem to somehow be photos of the same person. But that was nonsense.

"So... which one is Ranma?" Kaori asked.

"I-pardon? I don't really understand the question," Ukyo replied. "He's a boy... How is there confusion?"

"Well, with that curse... we didn't know which on is the real Ranma for sure. Turning back and forth like that with a little water. I wanted to know for sure. You know what I mean? There's no real reason cold water should activate the curse rather than hot water."

Ukyo's eyes lit up. Vengeance. Beautiful poetic sweet vengeance. Ukyo decided to take a closer look at the photos.

"You know... I had thought Ranma was a boy, but... the Ranma I knew was a redhead," Ukyo lied. There was a slight pang of guilt, but after what Ranma had done to Ukyo that warranted the vengeance.

The auburn haired Kaori's face lit up with an evil smile. Her and her friends rushed off, clearly intent on finding a way to milk this for all it was worth.

Ukyo turned to look for boxing club while wearing a smug grin. It wasn't enough to fix all the stress Ukyo was under, but it helped.

After knocking on the boxing room's door Ukyo was greeted by Shiina opening the door.

"Oh hey, it's the new guy... Can I help ya?" the tall lad asked.

"I need some stress relief. Can I beat up a punching bag?" the chef replied.

Shiina had to crack a smile. That was a sentiment he could understand. Of course Hibari had been a bit too invested in this new guy...

"Sparring's even better for stress relief. Whaddya say we go a few rounds?" he offered. Landing a few hits on this bishonen would be very satisfying for Shiina.

Ukyo paused a moment to think it over. "Alright."

Ukyo followed the tall teen over to the ring. Looking around most of the club seemed to be practicing at a pretty relaxed pace. Their technique seemed sloppy. Shiina tossed the chef a pair of gloves.

"Want some headgear?" the tall teen asked.

"I should be good," Ukyo replied while climbing into the ring.

Shiina shot forth a number of blows. Ukyo dipped and dodged them with relative ease. Shiina's movements showed potential and Ukyo felt it was honestly a shame someone with his natural ability was being held back by such a mediocre training environment. Ukyo decided to push back with a few punches as an attempt to push the taller teen to his limits. See if the potential Shiina had included learning quickly.

Ukyo's clear skill soon began to draw the attention of the other club members. Gradually the formed a crowd around the ring and started to cheer. Feeling the match had gone on long enough Ukyo stopped holding back and quickly forced Shiina onto the ropes. Soon enough Shiina yielded.

"Eheheh! You've got the makings of a champ!" a raspy voice called out.

Ukyo turned just in time to see a small bald man with an eyepatch charging over. The chef barely dodged as the man came bounding over. The diminutive man seemed to have little understanding of personal space.

"You've gotta join the team! We'll be regional champions in no time. Maybe even hit the nationals!" the man continued to ramble as some of the team members began to drag him off.

"You'll have to forgive the coach. He's a bit enthusiastic," on the team explained.

"He's right though! You'd be a great club member. Oh, the names Kaji by the way. Club captain," a guy who looked a couple of years older than Ukyo announced. He had a square face, thick eyebrows, and an unpleasant nasally voice. "You should join up. Enjoy the freedom of youth!"

"Uh... That's alright. I've got other things to keep me occupied," Ukyo replied.

"Are you sure? We could really use you!" Kaji continued.

Ukyo was temporarily saved by the door opening. Everyone turned to see who was heading in.

"S-sorry I'm late," a very pretty girl with shoulder length dark blue hair announced.

"Oh! The manager here's!"

"Kawai-chan!"

Suddenly many of the boys were surrounding her. They were all chatting away. Ukyo noticed that Shiina didn't seem very interested. The tall young man did seem very focused in pursuing Hibari. The focus seemed... somewhat admirable? Foolish though.

"Oh, who's the new guy?" the girl asked.

"Somebody with the potential to be our new champ! Hey, Ukyo, come on over!"

Not having anything better to do Ukyo decided to be friendly.

"This is our club's manager, Kawai Rie-chan. As you can see, she's a real cutie," a boy announced. He then leaned in close to Ukyo, "Single too. Part of why we're always so happy to see her."

"Er... it's a pleasure," Ukyo replied with a slight bow. "The name is Kuonji Ukyo."

"Oh! The okonomiyaki chef. Lots of people have been talking about you. I heard you're a great cook. Are you really joining the team?" Rie said.

"I might hang around from time to time," Ukyo replied. "Looks like a good training facility... but I'm planning to set up a restaurant in town. So I won't really have time to be a club member."

A wave of disappointed noises spread across the room.

"I would like to borrow the ring tomorrow though. Saotome and I have... some things to work out."

"Anyone who wants to work things out with Saotome-kun has my support," Shiina declared from over in the ring.

Ukyo gave thanks and headed off. It was time to get back to work hunting for restaurant locations. Or at least that was the plan, but Ukyo barely made it around the corner of the school outbuilding when Hibari appeared.

"Not bad. Shiina was certainly no match for you. But he's nowhere near Ranma."

"I don't usually go for unarmed," Ukyo replied. "But I do know how to handle myself. Against Ranma I plan to have a few surprises up my sleeve."

"Mhm... Then I'm guessing the odds are probably 4:1? Will depend on how tired Ranma is from his training tomorrow..."

"Pardon?"

"Oh, just trying to work out everything for when I start taking bets. You hadn't done any fighting, so I really didn't know how to balance things."

"You're taking bets?"

"My family are Yakuza. I need to get some experience with gambling if I want to take over the business. Plus it nets me some extra pocket money. I don't like the idea of my two favourite boys fighting... but I hope you'll both settle it like gentleman."

Hibari started to walk off, but turned just before rounding a corner. The cute blonde gave Ukyo a mischievous wink. Then she vanished.

Ukyo then realised some questions about that curse Ranma apparently would have been a good idea.

It was dark before Ranma and Genma made it back to Tokyo. By the time they made it to Nerima even a few bars were starting to close. Neither Saotome was in much of a mood for conversation. Genma however felt the need to list some critiques.

"You should avoid the beach for a while I think. At least until we find a cure."

Ranma just ignored him. The younger Saotome honestly prayed for rain so he wouldn't have to listen to the lecturing.

"We should think about moving you to another bedroom. Get you away from Hibari."

"I like my room," Ranma replied emotionlessly. "It's east facing. The dawn sun helps me wake up early."

"Not worth the downside though," Genma countered.

"Shouldn't I get used to be around him? Thanks to you I'm going to end up his... wife," Ranma hissed.

Admitting he might be in love with the blonde was something that still made Ranma a bit uncomfortable. Admitting which role he would have to play in the marriage ceremony though... that sent shivers down his spine. Though Hibari would probably object too in all honesty.

"I'm trying to get you out of this," Genma explained as they entered the Oozora compound. "There's still a chance. We just have to find him a girl who would look the other way."

"Maybe you just need to admit there's been a pattern you keep trying to ignore. It's always guys you've been pulling me from. Hibari. Ryoga. Ucchan. We just have to accept it... at least Hibari is the girliest yet. Not like I like it or anything, but apparently it's who I am..." Ranma fumed.

The younger Saotome stormed off as his father processed that information. Had Ranma and the Hibiki boy actually... Genma knew Ranma had been too nice to the lad, but that far? Maybe Genma had been too harsh when talking about women and left the boy only able to respect other men.

It wouldn't be until the next day Genma remembered who Ucchan was and he was left rather confused.

Ranma was barely half awake as Hibari walked him to school. He wasn't looking forward to it in the slightest. School was annoying enough on a good night's sleep.

"So, you knew Kuonji Ukyo?" Hibari asked as they neared the school.

"Huh? Ucchan? Yeah, I knew him. Was just thinkin' about him this week actually."

"Well, he's at Wakaba now. Apparently he's out for vengeance. Your father stole his family's yatai?"

Ranma paused to think about it. He remembered Ucchan chasing after them. Ukyo was crying and asking to be brought with them. Ranma was waving goodbye as he rode off.

Wait. Rode off?

That was right. It had been the Kuonji yatai he'd been riding. How did pop's get his hands on that?

"I half remember that actually. I always assumed pops had somehow bought it or somethin'. I'd like to try to make it up to him... but I think there's more than that between us. I was rememberin' some of the things he said back then. I think he mighta been in love with me."

Hibari raised an eyebrow. "Funny... he seemed to prefer girls when I knew him."

"Wait... when did you meet him?"

"Middle school. He was the cute cook."

"Well, if he was flirtin' with you is that really evidence of likin' girls?"

Hibari glared at the pigtailed boy. "He never had any reason to doubt I was a girl. And basically moved in as soon as he could."

Ranma was left in quiet thought at that. Maybe he'd always had enough of a feminine side to lure guys like Ukyo and Ryoga in? Hibari seemed to be interested in his masculinity though. None of this made any sense to him. Maybe he was really somewhere in the middle?

Wouldn't that be ironic.

Ranma had barely changed his shoes when a voice bellowed to him.

"Saotome Ranma! It's time for justice to be served!"

Turning he saw a bishonen brown haired youth in a gakuran pointing a giant spatula at him.

"Meet me in the boxing club gym. Now!"

With that Ukyo stormed off.

"Couldn't this have at least waited until lunch?" Ranma complained. "I was hoping to get a nap in during first period."

The boxing club's room was filled to the brim. Hibari was swarmed while collecting the mad rush of bets being placed. At some point she'd managed to set up a chalkboard and small booth displaying the current odds. Ranma however was swarmed himself by cameras and microphones. Wakaba had a surprising number of school newspapers (each of which had surprisingly high budgets... it had to be the only school with press conferences in Nerima) and none had liked missing out on Ranma's previous fights.

Ranma was flustered and overwhelmed by the attention, not able to follow the barrage of questions well enough to answer anyone in his drowsy state. Luckily Ukyo pounced over from the ring and grabbed a microphone.

"This is a matter of personal vengeance! Interviews can wait!" Ukyo shouted.

There was a flash of light as the school newspapers all took shots of Ukyo.

In the crowd Tsubame was surprised that one flash had obviously been pointed at her rather than Ukyo. Kaji-kun appeared soon after with an awkward look on his face.

"Tsubame-chan! What a surprise to run into you here," the captain of the boxing team announced. (He wasn't doing the best job of hiding his camera behind him. Luckily Tsubame was still blinded by the flash.)

"My... future brother-in-law has another fight. I'm sort of expected to come," she replied nervously. Kaji always sort of gave her the willies.

"QUIET!" Ukyo boomed over the raucous crowd. "We're trying to have a fight here!"

All eyes turned as Ukyo and Ranma both leapt into the ring. Ranma was looking casual while Ukyo was clad in a traditional cooking outfit. Ukyo drew his oversized spatula and pointed it at Ranma.

"I'm glad you showed up as a guy Saotome," Ukyo stated icely. "It'll make me feel less guilty about this. You always were a tomboy, so it suits you."

"What? Ucchan... You know I've always been a guy!" Ranma shot back.

"Oh really?" Ukyo replied with a smug smile.

"Look, man, I'm sorry about what my pops did. I'm also sorry I didn't understand he was stealin' at the time. There's no need to make up lies like this though. You know I've always been just as much of a guy as you."

Ukyo's eyes seemed to grow cold at that. "Then explain our engagement!"

"En-enga-gagement?" Ranma stuttered in shock.

Fearfully his eyes darted towards Hibari. He wanted to make it clear he had no idea what this was. The blonde however was too busy being swarmed by questions as Kaori and her friends led the charge.

"Let's stop talking and start fighting you thief!" Ukyo shouted.

Ukyo charged in, swinging the giant spatula violently. Ranma managed to dodge fairly easily. He was going to feel unimpressed, but then he remembered how easily he'd dealt with Ryoga just a couple days earlier. Apparently all that time dealing with the old hag had actually paid off.

Which meant Ukyo wasn't that big a physical challenge. The claims about his past were the bigger issue.

"Ucchan," he began as he dodged a spatula swing, "Seriously man... What are ya talkin' about?"

"Maybe some nice cold water would bring you back to your senses!" Ukyo roared, "But you'd shrink so small I'd feel like a bully."

Ranma managed to land himself on Ukyo's spatula and crouched down. "You really couldn't tell the difference between boys an' girls as a kid? Come on man, it's not that hard."

The image of a certain blonde then flashed in Ranma's head. "Well, not usually hard."

Ukyo flipped him off the spatula and proceeded to throw a number of normal sized spatulas at him as if they were throwing knives. Ranma swerved and dodged, but found himself landing in a batter of some sort. A batter that was frying on the metallic outer portion of the ring..

"Do you like my glue batter?"

Ranma struggled to pull himself free. He managed to get one foot loose, but at the cost of his balance. His hands stopped his fall, but also found out just how hot the outside of the ring was as soon as they hit the dark metal. He bounced up in an instant with a yelp, left balancing awkwardly on the one foot still stuck in glue batter and blowing on his hands to cool them off.

"He turned the ring into a grill!" Shiina gasped.

The coach cracked open an egg to confirm the point.

"You know, that would really make getting breakfast easy," the small old man mumbled.

"That seems so dangerous," Rie said.

Ukyo then threw oversized noodles which wrapped themselves around Ranma. He lost his balance and was left rolling desperately to get off the grill. He was just slow enough that some of the noodles began to cook and some of the audience complained it was making them hungry.

"And now to top it off. Exploding tempura flake special!" Ukyo proclaimed.

The cloud of cooking ingredients and gunpowder began to explode all around Ranma.

"Ranma!" Hibari shouted, ignoring the accusative questions from Kaori and her friends.

Worried she bounded over the crowd to reach the ringside. As the powder cleared from the air she saw Ranma was still standing and let out her breath.

Ranma however was clearly furious.

"Insulting my manhood. Shoutin' wild lies. And tryin' to cook me? We were friends once Ucchan... so I'll beat you to a pulp somewhere with a bit fewer witnesses."

With that he threw a now cooked glob of batter into Ukyo, sending the chef flying from the ring and out the window. Ranma chased after. The crowd began to boo as Hibari chased after. She was now more worried for Ukyo than Ranma... but also had a responsibility to tell the betting pool to see how it ended.

"Stand and fight like a man!" Ranma shouted as he bounded after Ukyo across the open lawn.

A clearly scared Ukyo dove to the side to avoid Ranma's flying leap. A few more blows saw Ukyo barely dodge. The chef went for a slicing spatula strike, but the move was countered by Ranma with a kick to Ukyo's midsection. Ukyo's grip on the spatula loosened and Ranma yanked it away.

The pigtailed boy decided to use the weapon himself and sliced at Ukyo. The chef's shirt was sliced open by the force of the blow despite's Ukyo's best dodging. Hibari noticed with confusion that Ukyo seemed quite focused on trying to hold his shirt closed.

"I think you need to cool down a bit!" Ukyo shouted, producing a water bottle to splash Ranma.

The furious little redhead twisted the spatula in his hands out of shape. "You're the one who drove me hotheaded with that grill of yours. All those underhanded tricks of yours... and you dare call yourself a man!"

Ranma slammed into Ukyo with a kick that sent the chef flying over the school fence and into a small bit of overgrown brush. Ranma bounded in after and tackled Ukyo. In the process his hand landed on a bit of chest that proved... rather soft. Momentary shock saw him receive a slap across the face from Ukyo.

Stumbling back the small redhead got a good look at his childhood friend and became very confused.

"W-when did you get those?" he asked, pointing towards Ukyo's breasts.

"Puberty. Like most girls," Ukyo replied flatly. "How about you Ranma? How long have you had yours?"

The small redhead stammered vaguely in confused shock. Ucchan was not supposed to be a girl!

"Ukyo-kun.. s-since when were you a girl?" Hibari asked as she appeared in the small clearing.

Ukyo blushed furiously. "I... well I've always been one. S-sorry for the deception Hibari."

Hibari's eyes turned towards empty space. "Can't I get one normal boyfriend?"

"Anybody who wants to date you ain't normal," Ranma told Hibari flatly, having taken some solace in someone else being just as confused. He then turned back to Ukyo. "But, why were ya livin' as a guy then?"

"After you left Ranma... I swore my life as a woman was over. I trained only for vengeance."

"Ya gave your femininity because I left ya?" Ranma replied, before turning back to Hibari. "Would that work on you?"

"Not a chance," the blonde stated flatly. "Wait... Ukyo was... was that engagement talk for real?"

"Yes... And I'd always thought Ranma knew. Just like I thought he knew I was a girl... I wasn't hiding it when he and I knew each other, though I suppose was a bit tomboyish. At the very least I thought when I mentioned the engagement he'd put two and two together. It's not like it makes sense for him to be engaged to a guy."

"Ahem," Ranma cleared his throat. Then indicated to Hibari.

The blonde glared at Ranma while Ukyo just looked confused. Then slowly realisation seemed to dawn upon her face.

"Wait... Hibari... y-your a guy?"

"Not by choice," the blonde pouted.

"It's not exactly somethin' ya choose," the small redhead replied.

"Look who's talking," Hibari countered.

Ukyo looked between the two and studied how Ranma was looking at Hibari. There was definitely something of a spark of romance there. If Ranma was interested in Hibari then...

'I can work with this,' Ukyo thought to herself. 'If Ranchan's got a thing for crossdressers I can definitely work with this. I wouldn't even have to girly up any. Probably.'

Ukyo stood up and grasped Hibari's hand in a firm handshake. "Well, Hibari, may the best ma-er wom-er... fiancé(e) win."

"Pardon?" Hibari managed to reply.