Chapter 11
That night both Amelia and Sofia woke to Arizona screaming. Sofia reached her mom's room first running in climbing on the bed. Gently hitting her mom's face trying to get her to wake up.
"Mommy its Sofia, I love you" she shouted, remembering when she had seen her Mamma waking Mommy up after the plane crash. Arizona's screams stopped instead she grabbed Sofia hugging her closely whilst still asleep. Sofia wiggled slightly so she could move her arms.
"Bad dreams bad dreams go away, good dreams good dreams here to stay" Sofia waved her hands over her mommy repeating it 3 times, Sofia quickly settled into bed next to her mom feeling the safety that only Mom's could bring. Amelia watched from the door making sure that Arizona didn't hit out from her nightmare, only leaving when both girls were sleeping.
Sofia woke first the next morning but didn't move enjoying cuddling her mom too much that didn't stop her from wiggling slightly. The wiggling woke Arizona up, like her daughter she didn't get up enjoying the cuddles too much to move at least until her daughter's wiggling hit her full bladder.
"Okay bub, I need a wee" Arizona apologised grabbing her crutches. Returning to her room Sofia was sat on the edge of the bed.
"I'm hungry Mommy"
"Okay baby, do you want cereal or pancakes?" Arizona asked already knowing the answer.
"Pancakes" Sofia said jumping on the bed. Arizona would normally tell her daughter off but not today.
"Okay let me get dressed" Arizona sighed one downside of having a prosthetic was the inability to do anything practical without it on, even making breakfast balancing on crutches was impossible and once the prosthetic was on it was easier just to put clothes back on rather than her pyjamas. She missed breakfast in pyjamas.
Dressed Sofia was already in the kitchen pancake mix out.
"Hurry Mommy, my tummy is growling" her daughter urged, Arizona laughed, sometimes Sofia was exactly like Callie. Impatient. Arizona did as her daughter asked and made the pancakes and cut the fruit,
"Syrup or chocolate?" she asked her daughter who was snacking on the fruit already
"Both Mommy" Sofia replied grinning. Arizona laughed, other times her daughter was all her. She checked her phone finding another text from Callie asking if she was okay, if she needed anything, sighing Arizona replied in the negative. The last thing she needed was Callie popping over, if she did Arizona wasn't sure that she could keep it from her. While it was nice to know Callie still cared but this, this would suffocate her, and she couldn't do that to her ex-wife again. Callie should be happy, spend her time worrying about Penny, not spending her time worrying about her. She wasn't worth it.
After eating the pancakes and cleaning the mess they headed off to the aquarium, Sofia wearing her finding nemo t-shirt Arizona matching both t-shirts had Nemo and Marlin printed on high fiving. It was incredibly cheesy, but Sofia thought they were the coolest when they'd been shopping, and Arizona secretly did to. The aquarium was the perfect place to wear them.
At the aquarium they spent time at all the fish, especially the finding nemo tank,
"Look Mommy its Nemo and Dory and that has to be Nemo's dad. I speaaaaakkkkk whaaaaaallllleeeeee" Sofia called to the fish in the tank that ignored her.
"Dr Robbins?" One of the sea life workers came over. "I don't know if you remember me, you treated my son, Benny after he fell out of the tree house" Arizona nodded now able to place the man it had been several years ago when she had first made it to Seattle,
"Yes, how is he now?"
"At college studying medicine, he wants to be a Peds surgeon like you" The man said, "Is this your daughter?" he asked bending down.
"This is Sofia, she is 6"
"Hello, I'm Danny, your mom saved my son Ben when he was just a bit older than you"
"Mommy is a rock star" Sofia replied proudly.
"As a thank you why don't I take you both behind the scenes?" he offered.
"Can we Mommy please?" Sofia begged excitedly bouncing up and down.
"Sure, thank you" Arizona replied controlling her panic, being alone with her daughter and a man wasn't high on her list but she couldn't deny Sofia. Danny took them to the employee only area swiping them in. Multiple fish tanks stood with chemicals and food piled up to the side
"This is where we put our sick fish, like a hospital we are a rescue centre too, this is Coco, she is a turtle rehomed from Miami sea life, we are looking to rehome her in our tank as we don't think she'd survive in the wild." He showed them the turtle in a small box,
"Why she is there?" Sofia asked
"She was hit by a boat, and we need her wounds to heal," Danny explained. He stepped closer to Arizona intent on lifting the turtle out. Arizona tensed stepping away taking a breath. His aftershave was the same as Graham's, nausea rose in her throat so did the feeling of panic.
They'd worked on panic attacks in therapy, trying to focus on the room, taking a few more steps back Arizona remembered the 5 steps,
See: Fish, tanks, Sofia, Turtle, bubbles, hear filters, Sofia, bubbles, splashing, voices. Touch, trousers, the floor, the glass of the tank nearest, smell, chlorine and fish, taste: vomit. She was safe, at the aquarium, with Sofia.
"Sorry" she apologised to Danny who'd noticed her mini freak out and had distracted Sofia,
"Are you okay?" he asked, he could see the faint bruises around her neck and wrists and could make an educated guess as to what had happened. Still struggling to verbalise Arizona nodded,
"Okay Sofia you want to see our baby seals?" he asked, Sofia squealed. Arizona followed glad he was sensitive.
At the seal rescue centre Sofia was in her element, and even got to stroke one. Arizona took a million photos, Danny even taking one of the both of them next to a pacific seal called Kenny. He even let Sofia feed Kenny his lunch, Arizona getting a great photo of Sofia's face as she held a wet slimy fish for the first time.
Thanking Danny for the tour they left via the gift shop, Arizona treating Sofia to a soft toy seal that looked exactly like Kenny and agreeing to sponsor a seal. Arizona knew she was spoiling her daughter but after almost never seeing her daughter again she figured she deserved a little spoiling.
After the sea life centre and with her leg getting sore, they stopped for burgers and fries, Sofia eating her own as well as most of Arizona's fries the nausea from the panic attack not helping her appetite. She knew she'd lost a considerable amount of weight which is why her leg was rubbing more, still the thought of spending time in shorts with David her prosthetists in a confined room was terrifying. Instead, she just added more padding and hoped for the best.
After lunch they went on a harbour cruise, spotting sea life in the wild. Lots of seal were swimming and even some Orca's. They had a great time spotting the wildlife and taking photos. The cruise docked as the sun set, both exhausted they went home Arizona cooking soup with cheese and toast. After was finding nemo again, Amelia joining then bath time and bed. As soon as Sofia was in bed Arizona changed into her own pyjama's removing her leg sitting on the couch on an ice pack. She needed to see David. Maybe she could persuade Natasha to join her, that's what therapists did right?
Amelia came in, noticing the redness of the stump and blisters,
"You need it re fitted, do you want me to come with you?" Amelia offered. At Arizona surprised look she continued. "I mean I know you do it all the time but if you wanted company, I've always been interested in the fitting process" Amelia lied, in truth she sensed Arizona needed a friend and having had multiple tough times herself she really wanted to be there for her.
"Thank you I'll call Monday and text you the appointment details" Arizona promised grateful to have company, at least she wouldn't be alone in the room.
They watched trash TV together for a bit longer, before calling it a night.
Arizona woke to breath on her face then a wet slobbery kiss, after a moment of panic she opened her eyes, expecting to see Graham to be back tied up, instead she found Sofia who was less than 10cm away from her face.
"You were crying Mommy" her daughter explained patting her face. "I kiss it better"
"Thank you, baby, you make me feel so much better" Arizona said bringing her daughter in to cuddle, "I got to say it, bad dream bad dreams" Sofia started, Arizona relaxing on the bed behind her daughter she could see the clock 0300. Snuggling into the bed both girls were soon asleep.
Sunday morning came, Sofia woke up first, aware she'd woken her mommy previously she decided to sneak out and watch cartoons. Scooby doo was on, Sofia loved scooby doo.
Amelia was the next up,
"Oooh scooby doo," She poured cereal, "You want coco pops or lucky charms?"
"Coco pops please" Sofia asked, "Scooby snacks" she whispered absorbed in the show, "Scooby need snacks"
Amelia handed over the coco pops.
"We got to look for the ghost, it kidnapped Megan but scooby got snacks so he is brave now." Sofia's eyes widened. "We need to go," she dumped the coco pops on the lounge table. "Auntie Melia we need to get Mommy's Scooby snacks so she can be brave too"
"Okay, let's go, what is Mommy's favourite snack?" Amelia asked putting her coco pops down. This sounded like fun and Arizona needed something to cheer her up.
"Doughnuts and ice cream, with sprinkles." Sofia grinned, "We get the doughnuts from the bakery, Mommy likes the pink ones" Amelia checked the clock,
"Its 6am it won't be open yet, but we can go tomorrow, hide the doughnuts in Mommy's office so when she gets to work, she'll find them" Amelia plotted, "I bet a picture from you would help her feel brave too" Sofia leapt off the couch in order to start colouring. Amelia stopped her,
"Breakfast first then colouring" Amelia ordered use to her nieces and nephew being the same. Sofia sighed dramatically collapsing on the couch. Eating her coco pops as quickly as possible she wanted to draw her picture before Mommy woke up.
Arizona woke late, the sun was streaming through the gap in her curtains. Sofia, she sat up her stump automatically protesting still sore from walking previously. Forgoing her leg, she used her crutches to mobilise intent on finding her daughter. Sofia's door was closed, Arizona balanced pushing it open only to see her daughter's head poking out,
"You can't come in Mommy" she ordered, pouting, "It's a surprise, and if you see you won't be surprised" Arizona smiled, her daughter sounded just like Callie.
"Okay have you had breakfast?"
"Uh huh Aunt Melia got me coco pops"
"Okay well when you've finished, I'll be in the lounge" Arizona went back to her bedroom showering and dressing putting her leg on having breakfast and reading journals. With her leg sore Arizona decided to stay close to home today. Especially as her first day back as tomorrow. Sitting on the sofa she slipped her leg off today she was going to wear it as little as possible.
Sofia finished colouring hiding her picture in Amelia's room and skipping to the lounge jumping on her mom from behind
"So, do I get to see the surprise?" Arizona asked impatiently, Sofia shook her head.
"Not yet Mommy" Sofia giggled as Arizona lifted her daughter up then started a tickle attack.
"No mommy stop," Sofia cried giggling, Arizona did, giggling too.
"So, I thought today we'd bake some cakes and decorate them"
"Yay" Sofia clapped, "Can we give some to Mamma and Penny?" she asked, Arizona nodded biting her bruised lip to hide the tears that Penny's name brought, "And Zola, Bailey and Ellis?"
"And Zola, Bailey and Ellis too" her daughter was so generous, "And we have to pack you go to your Mamma's tomorrow night,"
"No mommy, I need to stay with you" Sofia protested, "I need to cuddle you when your dreams get bad" Arizona smiled at how thoughtful her daughter was,
"It's okay baby, Auntie Amelia is here she'll drive away the bad dreams"
"But she doesn't have super magical kisses" Sofia argued,
"I'll stop by day care every day" Arizona promised, "But your mamma misses you too,"
"But I want to stay here, what if you get poorly again" Sofia pouted,
"Goose I love you so much, and I will stop by day care and if that's not enough I will video call you every day but your only at Mamma's for 2 nights then back here for 3 nights"
"I can call lots" Sofia said, Arizona nodded, "Okay but why can you and Mamma not live together, then she can look after you and I can see both of you?" it was a question Sofia had asked lots
"Because Mamma and Mommy weren't making each other happy anymore and this way Mamma gets to be happy" Arizona explained, hoping her daughter wouldn't pick up on her omission
"What about you?" Sofia asked concerned, Arizona gave her the biggest smile she could,
"I'm happy when you and Mamma are happy" Arizona lied "And you being with Mamma makes her happy"
"I miss you when I'm at Mamma's and I miss Mamma when I'm here" Sofia explained sadly. Arizona hugged her
"I know goose and you have been so brave" she praised. "Let's go wash up and start on our cakes" Arizona said trying distraction.
After cooking the cakes, and decorating them, they went to the park, Arizona was watching Sofia on the monkey bars when her phone buzzed.
Are you around we need to talk? Callie, Arizona's frowned, that didn't sound good, what did Callie need to talk about that she couldn't call or text about?
I'm at the park with Sofia, what's up? Arizona
Can you drop her a Mer's and meet for coffee? Please its important, Callie
Curious Arizona agreed Sofia easily agreeing to the impromptu play date. Popping home to make sure her make up covered most the bruises her hair and clothing covering the rest, Amelia offered to drive Sofia over, wanting to spend time with her nieces and nephew.
Heart pounded mind racing Arizona drove to the coffee shop. What did Callie want? Had she found out about the attack? Had she found out she had been in hiding for the last 2 weeks actively avoiding everyone other than Amelia, Miranda and Natasha. Hands shaking she walked into the café.
Callie was already in the coffee shop drinking her coffee. Arizona's preferred coffee a flat white sitting ready. Arizona's breath hitched, Callie looked beautiful, sexy, she looked amazing, Arizona felt ugly in comparison, worthless,
"You've lost weight" Callie commented as she sat down, her eyes concerned as she reached out to stroke Arizona's arm but stopped herself. "Are you feeling better?" In truth she was worried about her ex she looked like she had lost 2 stone in the 2 weeks she had been off, she looked ghastly white, and was that a cut on her forehead? Qhy was she wearing so much make up and long sleeves?
She cursed herself she had let Arizona push her away for the last 2 weeks because it was easier, Penny was getting closer and had moved in full time. She had even met Sofia. Although Penny was the perfect girlfriend she got techy every time Arizona was brought up, especially when Callie mentioned going over instead distracting her with something else, normally sex. Callie now felt that was wrong, she'd been right to be concerned.
"Yes better" Arizona said not lying, she was definitely better than she was 2 weeks ago in the hands of Graham. She felt the panic bubbling up and took a sip of the coffee using the warmness to centre herself.
"You cut your head?" Callie questioned, motioning on her own head to where the cut was. She could tell Arizona had clammed up, and wanted to try get her to open up.
"I fell hit the toilet, vomiting, didn't put my leg on fast enough" Arizona lied, "Amelia patched me up" there was an awkward silence, Callie wanting to ask more questions, she knew Arizona was lying but couldn't tell why or what the lie was. She knew her ex-wife was stubborn, if Arizona didn't want to talk she wouldn't.
"You wanted to talk?" Arizona asked bringing Callie back into the present. Callie hesitated wondering, whether to push it more, was it her place to make Arizona talk, what were they now?
"Callie?" Arizona pressed impatiently. Callie sighed, while she wanted to push she did need to share her exciting news, maybe after she could press Arizona for the full story.
"I'm sure you heard that Penny won the Preminger grant in New York" Callie started, twisting her fingers nervously. Arizona nodded
"Yeah," she replied not sure where this was going,
"I'm going with her" Callie's face broke out into a smile, "I mean I thought we'd have to break up, but then I realised I can get an ortho job anywhere and I'm sure there is funding out there so I can continue my research, but there is only one Preminger grant"
Arizona's face furrowed into confusion, Callie was moving, was she willing to give up her daughter for Penny?
"And it's only a 6-hour flight, so you can come out and see Sofia whenever you want" Callie rambled excitedly after all this was everything she wanted, "And there are really good schools nearby and some of the best dance schools, Penny will have better hours and we found a lovely apartment just 2 blocks from central park" Callie finished, expecting Arizona to be just as excited as she was, after all New York was a wonderful opportunity for Sofia and for her. A fresh start, away from all the ghosts that haunted her here in Seattle. Mark, George, Erica, Leah, and Lauren, death and betrayal were everywhere she looked at Grey Sloan, was she so bad for wanting something new, fresh?
"No" Arizona cried, "No" Callie was talking about taking her daughter away, flying her cross country, "You don't just get to take my daughter"
"She is my daughter too" Callie argued, "And New York is full of opportunities,"
"No, you may have given birth to her, but she is as much my daughter as she is yours, you don't get to take her away." Arizona screamed, stumbling to her feet, her ears ringing as her anxiety built. She made her way outside, ignoring Callie's shouts, she got into her car driving 2 blocks away before allowing the panic attack to hit.
She sobbed hysterically, finding her breath coming in short bursts, Callie was going to take her daughter Callie was going to leave, she was going to be alone. Had she really suffocated her ex-wife so much she needed to move states. Sitting alone in her car Arizona reflected on her life, how had everything gone wrong, how was everything so messed up. Jump on a flight Callie had said, jump on a plane, a 6-hour flight, even the thought of flying set her panic attack back off.
She was going to lose everything. How could Callie do this to her?
I'm sorry, but i couldn't resist making life harder for both characters for a while.
Let me know what you think, how bad should the custody case get? I'm thinking really bad,