17 years after – old timeline
Vanya watched the woman in black in front of her. She immediately guessed who she was and stood up. She felt her heart beating up in pure fear of the woman.
'Get out,' was all she said hoping she sounded more courageous than she felt.
'Well, I guess you heard a lot of things about me as well,' said the woman smugly and lowered her offered hand walking around the cell.
'Hm, all that hard work put into this little place for you, and for nothing,' she said before she smiled and looked at her again.
Even if the woman wasn't the cause of Five having to kill innocent people, she still wouldn't like her simply for the smugness she carried herself around with like she owned the place.
'I don't know what you want but you should leave,' she said surprised by how steady her own voice sounded.
'Oh, so you do have a bit of a fire inside of you. Then again if you cause the destruction of the whole planet you should have some,' said the woman and stopped looking at her again.
'You're such a plain little thing, aren't you?' she asked mocking her.
'Just-'
'You know this won't work?' asked the Handler pointing around herself at the cage, 'It didn't work before either.'
Vanya tried to stand her ground and not engage.
The woman watched for a moment and she could see she caused annoyance to cross her face, 'Very well. You have already been here before. Of course the circumstances were a bit different then. Your siblings locked you up and you finally decided to let out all that suppressed anger and betray and use it to a good cause. I envy you for that. I wish I could finally stick it to all those who hurt me in the past,' she said and put a hand over her chest dramatically, 'All those bullies who never treated me right or made me and made me feel useless, worthless, like I was…nothing-'
'What do you want? Do you want to upset me? Make me explode?' asked Vanya before she shook her head, 'Nice try, but it won't work. I rather get stuck in here forever than cause the apocalypse. Whatever plan you and the commission got going you miscalculated.'
The woman watched her for a moment before she gave her a dark smirk, 'Oh darling Vanya,' her words were like venom, 'we never miscalculate. The apocalypse will happened one way or another and you will always be the one to cause it. You were destined for it ever since you were a sweet little girl who broke her nannies' necks.'
Vanya tried to keep her hands from shaking. For once she wished she wouldn't show fear and weakness. Just once. Just not in front of this devilish woman. She felt like she was a child again under the cold stare of her father after he told her once again she didn't belong and she should leave.
'You're lying,' she said, but the woman calmly shook her head, 'My dear child. Timelines are pesky little things always going one way or another, but every time, with the Umbrella Academy or not, with Five disappearing or not with Ben dying or not with billions of different scenarios the result stays the same. You kill the world. You were created for that purpose only, Vanya Hargreeves, and I think deep down you can feel it as well now.'
'Shut up,' said Vanya shaking her head.
It isn't true. It's not true. I can stop this. I just need to stay put here and it will all go away. That is all!
'You don't-'
'Oh, but we do. We experienced it many times, with many many different scenarios all leading to you causing the apocalypse. That is just the way things are and nothing you or Number Five will ever pull off will change it. It can't. And believe me when I say you tried everything there is in the book.'
Vanya closed her eyes, desperately. This couldn't be true. It couldn't be right. She couldn't be right. She worked for the commission who wanted the apocalypse she was lying.
'What do you want? Why did you come?' asked Vanya and the Handle sighed, 'The apocalypse always happens. There is just this little problem about the exact date. Right now because of this little stunt of yours it was pushed a couple of hours which is not how we like it. It has to happen on time, not sooner or later, but exactly on time,' explained the Handler before she checked her watch, 'Right now you pushed it to 1a.m, but we short of need it at 9p.m, so I came to offer you a small deal.'
'Deal?!' snapped Vanya, 'You want me to end the world. What could you possibly offer me to even consider helping you in any way?'
'Your life,' said the Handler like it was the best thing in the world, 'With your pills the powers are at bay and so are your emotions which would make you a perfect fit for the commission.'
Vanya was confused.
'Make sure the apocalypse happens at 9.p.m and the commission will save you and make you one of our little associate. It could be very beneficial for you-'
'You want me to kill the world-'
'But not the past,' said the Handler with a smile, 'And there are countless of events which need to be taken care of and monitored. It's a great job you would love it,' said the woman and Vanya shook her head, 'You're sick. You're the worst…bitch I ever met and you're sick. You want me to kill everyone on the planet and for what-?'
'To secure the timeline of course.'
'What is a timeline for if there are no humans?' asked Vanya and the Handler's smile froze on her face a bit, 'That's not for you to know, dear.'
'You're insane,' said Vanya finally, but the woman smirked, 'No, I'm giving you a choice. Something you were very rarely given during your life. Do you know what will happen after this? After you cause the apocalypse? You will be alone in the wasteland that you killed.'
Vanya frowned, 'What does that mean?'
'Oh, it's all…so…tragically romantic really…kind of the things fairytales are made of,' said the Handler, 'It's a phenomenal which a few of us in the commission often bet on. Every time Five travels to the future he lives in the world you burnt, and every time he doesn't…you're the only one left standing while him and the rest of the world are dead. Why? I don't know either. Maybe it's just one of those things-'
'You're lying,' said Vanya and the Handler smirked, 'No dear girl, I'm not. Every time there is a timeline in which Five travels to the future and gets stuck you died with the rest of the world and every time you survive he never jumps in the first place. It's a never ending story of the two you…one must always die for the other to live a long and terrible life all alone.'
Vanya shook her head tears rolling down her cheeks. She cursed at herself for being so weak in front of this terribly cruel woman, 'You're lying-'
'It's true, and I wouldn't tell you this if I really didn't need that 9 o clock apocalypse. You still have a couple of hours to kill. Make sure you use them to think this through. It wouldn't be the worst case to travel with our agency and maybe occasionally see him,' she said and Vanya tried to stop the tears, 'Would it now?'
The woman then disappeared as if she was only a hallucination before Vanya fell on her hands and knees crying and banging to the ground in desperation and agony.
She couldn't calm down…
Was it true? Was any of it true? Was she and Five really destined for such a terrible faith? She wanted to keep him save, but could it be true that there was no way to stop it all, to stop her?
She covered her mouth trying to hold all the noises while choking on her own tears. She felt like she couldn't breath. She wanted to scream, but not even that. She just…she just…she wanted her pills again. With them she at least got confused by the numbness of it all and didn't have to feel how everything hurt so much right now. She felt the crushing pain inside her of brutalizing her as she cried on the ground seemingly without an end.
She wasn't sure how many time has passed, but she must have used up all her tears because she slowly rose up and shook her head. If the woman was right, if she wasn't lying then…then there was only one way to stop this all.
'I can't…I can't….I can't do this…'
But she had to…
17 years ago – now – new timeline
Thirteen year old Vanya watched in horror as Five spoke with their father about time travelling. She could feel something inside her demanding to be left out as she anxiously anticipated what would come out of Five's new confrontation with their father about time travelling.
She dreaded the worst, which was confirmed the moment Five looked at her. She barely managed to shake her head the only indication of what she thought of the whole madness. She felt her insides on fire as she watched Five's jaw set with determination before he stormed out of the room.
'NUMBER FIVE!' called their father through the room.
She had been numbed the pills for days now the first time to waken up when Five's knife hit the table close to her. Her thoughts were still unfocused but how could she just let him leave like that? Leave her? Abandon her like this after all they have been through? She thought...she assumed they were close...or was it all in her head. What if it was all a dream caused by the pills? What if it wasn't real?
Her mind was a mess, but she knew one thing. She couldn't just let him leave like this...
She rushed from her seat briefly hearing Ben and father call after her before she was outside on the street, something she never done on her own before. Before she at least had Five by her side and the rest of their siblings or their father, but never just her alone.
'Five!' she screamed at him just as she saw him disappear in the flash of blue light completely.
He was gone...
Vanya felt like someone sucked the air out of her lungs as the realization hit her. He was gone without a goodbye. He left her here alone. He was gone...
Gone...
She spun around suddenly ready to run herself home or down to the opposite direction she wasn't sure yet, but before she could for her eyes got momentary blinded by another flash of light, 'Oh.'
'V-vanya,' she heard and forced her eyes to open and look at Five flinching as they caught his appearance.
What happened to him?
Vanya opened her mouth to ask about the dirty uniform and messy hair and cut lip and bruise before she felt him almost collapse against her in the most soul crushing and desperate hug she ever received from him.
'Five,' she breathed his name against his shoulder as she hesitantly put her arms around him. They slept together in one bed, and occasionally took each other's hands or brushed cheek, but Vanya couldn't remember the last time if ever she received such an intense and desperate hug from Five.
'W-what happened to you?' she asked so confused. He was just here and then he was gone and now he was here, but all dirty and smelled like dust and-
'Number Five! Number Seven! This behaviour is inexcusable. Come inside at once!' said their father as he walked outside, his cold eyes making Vanya shiver.
'Please,' she heard in her ear as Five pressed even closer against her. Even his voice sounded different. So small and weak and just...defeated...
'Please, come with me...let's go away...please Vanya-'
'Number Seven, step away from Number Five immediately,' said her father his voice cruel and dominant. She never misbehaved before at least not to an actual order. She might have slept in Five's room, and she stole some sweets and skipped some practises and study seasons, but she never actually did something he specifically told her not to or ignored an actual order. But Five sounded so...weak and small. She was torn by the dilemma.
'NUMBER SEVEN!' her father's voice cut her like a knife hurting her in the most vulnerable part of her soul. She was already such a disappointment to him, she didn't want to be even worst...but...but...
She wasn't sure what would be her decision, but she found her arms tightening around Five's body nodding not sure if at Five's pleas or her father's orders, before she felt the worst feeling yet of being jerked like she was a raggedy doll and then force to crawl through the smallest places imaginable sucking all the air out of her making her stomach twist like inside a washing machine.
She let out a gasp trying to catch her breath or learn how to breath again as if she wasn't sure how to do it. She held onto Five for dear life trying to compose herself before she opened her eyes and found her father was gone. In fact, the whole house was gone as she realized what happened.
'Five, did you just teleported with me?' she asked looking at the unfamiliar buildings and neighbourhood over his shoulder knowing it was the only explanation how did they turn up there all of the sudden.
'There's a motel near. It will take him a while to find us,' mumbled Five against her before he let her go her body immediately cold as if on protest from missing his warm. Vanya watched with concern as he started to limp toward what she assumed was the direction of the mentioned motel.
'Five,' she called rushing after him, 'please stop. Look at me,' she took his hand which finally made him pause and look at her hand for a moment before he looked up at her face. He looked so...broken?
'Are you really here?'
Vanya didn't understand then question, but she furiously nodded, 'Of course. You can see me can't you? You can feel me, right?' she asked and squeezed his hand while lifting it so he would look at it.
His eyes were different, distant, unfocused. They moved to their joined hands for a moment before he said, 'I suppose...Klaus used to say dead don't feel like anything. You can't touch the dead.'
Vanya was so confused even more by this. She looked around them. Perhaps, it wasn't the smartest thing to do to run from their father, but now they were away from the house and Five obviously needed to lie down for a moment. He looked so wrecked it scared her to the bone.
'You said there is a motel?' she asked before she looked at him, his eyes were still on their hands, 'You were so cold...'
Vanya licked her lips feeling the fear creep into her heart before she put her hand on Five's shoulder causing him to look at her once again.
'Five, focus for a moment, alright?' she asked softly hoping it would help him a bit if she spoke calmly with him. She had no idea what she was doing, 'We'll get to the motel and talk,' she suggested hoping it would sound assuring enough to get them off the street as she noticed people walking by staring at a boy and girl in school uniforms as Five looked like he just crawled out of an demolished building.
'You will come with me,' he asked and she nodded, 'Of course, lead the way?'
Vanya wasn't sure about it, but Five snatched the key from the unattended desk and lead her to one of the rooms before he locked it and pushed the curtains shut groaning in pain as he did the last one.
'Five, seriously, what's wrong?' she asked worried. This was not alright. None of this was alright. Five ran from the house determinate to time travel and disappeared in a flash of blue light different than he used to teleport in. Then he came back but from a different direction and he looked so shaken and all his clothes were ruined and he was hurt. The whole point of Five's argument with dad was that he believed he could time travelled. Could it be that he did? If so how much time had passed since he left and where the hell did he go to end up like this? She had so many questions running through her mind, but the only one which really mattered was...
Was he alright? Was he hurt?
'It's nothing. Don't bother with it. Just-just please...don't leave,' he said and closed his eyes his lips twisting in a pained expression.
Vanya shook her head, 'I'm not leaving, but Five...you don't look so good. Maybe...maybe mom or Pogo if not dad-'
'Don't tell anyone. Just...let's stay here...just for a while,' he said looking incredibly tired all of the sudden almost pale on the face.
'I-I just need a moment to think and rest and then I'll be good,' he said nodded several times his eyes slowly closing for good.
'Five?' asked Vanya stepping closer to him.
'It's nothing-,' he said before he fainted to the ground.
'FIVE!' she half-shouted before she rushed to his side. He was on the carpet looking so damn small and hurt she wasn't sure what to do.
She rolled him on his back something familiar to instinct and years of watching their Mom treat their wounds kicked in.
His jacket came open and she saw the red soaking through his white shirt from under it. Vanya pulled it open only to reveal a terrifying wound with torn stitches.
'Oh God,' she said feeling her stomach ready to protest against the sight of the wound, but somehow deciding not to. This was a mistake. She needed to go call dad or mom or Pogo or anyone. Five was bleeding out in front of her. It was so surreal for a moment she wasn't even sure it was real.
She got up and rushed outside hearing a baby cry from the next room.
'Hello,' she said at the front desk as she spotted the woman behind the counter who eyed her suspiciously.
'Can I help you?'
'I-I...,' she should have told her about the wound. She should have told her to call her father or the ambulance, but instead the first things which came out of her was, 'M-my mom asked if you have a first aid kit.'
The woman blinked and Vanya's ears burnt with embarrassment. She never lied like this before. She never lied at all before. What the hell was she doing honestly?
The woman didn't say anything after that and reached under the counter before she pulled out the kit and hand it to her, 'Which room?'
'105,' blurred Vanya the room she heard the baby inside.
The woman nodded and Vanya hurried back to Five. He was still on the ground where she left him without movement.
'I have no idea what I'm doing. Please be okay,' she said as she kneeled next to him and opened the kit.
Please if there is a God please do not let him die like this...
Vanya silently watched the muted TV in front of her. In the house they didn't have one only a radio which was only one if father allowed it usually when the report was talking about the Umbrella Academy's heroic acts.
She watched the cartoon characters a mouse and a cat run around the house trying to catch or prank each other. It was funny, but she barely enjoyed it as she constantly kept on looking over at Five who was lying on the bed tugged in. She didn't want to wake him up by the TV sounds so she kept it muted. She still didn't know what was happening, but even without the wound, he looked like he have been through hell and needed to rest.
She still couldn't believe what was happening. Maybe the pills started to cause her hallucinations and none of this was real?
It sure felt surreal when her fingers pushed away his jacket and shirt to reveal a massive bleeding injure. It took everything inside her not to throw up or faint. Good thing she didn't even have time for breakfast that day.
She looked down at her fingers. No matter how much soap she applied in the small bathroom of the motel room, she could still see the dry blood under her fingernails. She should be grateful for the pills in a way because somehow she was sure that if she was without them completely she would probably freaked out on and froze or maybe she was in shock or maybe it was still a hallucination caused by the pills.
She looked at Five again.
I will always come back...
He did come back. He kept the promised, but at what caused? She was desperate to know what happened to him. What did he go through...why was he saying all those things which made no sense and not wanting dad around?
It was the second when the animated cat crashed into the wall that the bed jerked with the abruptness Five sat up gasping for air.
'Vanya,' he said looking all over the place as if he didn't even see her.
She leaned closer to him almost completely in front of his face, 'Five-Five, it's me. I'm here.'
He blinked at her for a couple of moments before he put his hands covered in dried blood on her cheeks, 'You're here. You're alive.'
This terrified her to no end. Where else would she be? And why wouldn't she be alive?
'Of course,' she said wanting nothing more than to smooth the panic behind Five's eyes even if she would have to lie to him or something. His eyes didn't look like his own, they felt different like eyes of a stranger or a very old friend she hasn't seen in a long time and forgot how he looked.
He let his hands fall from her face to and looked around, 'What happened? I fainted?'
She nodded, 'Yeah.'
He looked at his shirt which was unbuttoned before he pushed it open to look at his wound.
'You stitched me up again?' he asked surprised and confused which made Vanya want to laugh.
'Yeah, I saw mom do it like a million of times after your missions so I just...I don't know. It was like a reflex. You said people in traumatic situations either shut down or the adrenaline kicks in and they find a way to solve the problem. I guess I did the second one.'
Vanya chuckled a bit the stress from the situation finally letting her go a bit and lightened up. Five was awake and alive as well which was absolute relief, 'Not bad for a first timer.'
He looked up at her and his face was just so full of emotions, it caused her to shut up for a moment not being able to find the right words. He just looked so...stunned and sad and yet hopeful and desperate all mixed into one complex expression on his face. She felt like he was millions miles away running through so many different things, she would never be able to catch up with his mind. She never minded it though, as long as he found a way to get back to reality of the moment, and her.
His hand was on her cheek suddenly and she blushed under his intense look. She felt...she wasn't sure what she felt, but her heart was beating insanely fast and his gaze made her want to look away and yet not? She felt warm and funny... she wasn't sure if she liked the feeling or not.
'Uh, F-five?' her voice sounded ridiculously strange.
'I love you,' he said and her eyes widened as the shock fell upon her.
He what-?
This was the strangest thing she ever heard him say even more since he said it so...carelessly as if it was a matter of fact, a common sense. She didn't understand why he said it thought. Of course, they cared for each other, they were raised together and grew close for one another, he was more like her best friend than a sibling, but he never said he loved her. Not in those words. He showed it in sleeping next to her when she was having nightmares and taking her out on adventures and being nice and good to her, but he never said it. And she honestly didn't know what to tell him or what it meant.
'Wh-'
'I love you, more than I love myself, and I know that you don't understand it yet. You're so young now, but I love you. I always loved you and I always will,' he said with confidence which was too much even for the Number Five she knew.
Vanya blinked confused by this confession...
Why did he say it? And what did it meant? No one ever told any of them those words. Not even Pogo or mom. She thought I love you was just some formula used in books they read in the library, but even when she read those stories and those words she didn't really understood what them meant. She thought about it for a moment though not wanting him to just say it like that and her not reacting in some way. If people said those words to express how much they cared for one another and felt close to another other and wanted to keep safe one another then it made sense that she felt the same because she wanted all those things for Five as well.
'I...I love you too,' she said slowly even thought the words felt weird on her tongue, not because she didn't mean them, but because she wasn't sure if she fully understood their power and meaning yet.
'You don't understand what that means yet,' he said catching her off guard and causing her to frown a bit annoyed. He could always read her so easily, but now he made it sound like she was a child when they were same age. She knew he was smarter than her and often acted like the more mature one out of them, but she still didn't like such behaviour from him,
He looked away before he took a deep breath and let his hands fall from her face. Before she could say anything to him he continued, 'Listen to me very carefully alright?' he asked.
Vanya nodded making a mental note to talk about this with him as well as...think later about what his previous confession meant.
'There is something which is going on. Something bad and you have to trust me, do you trust me?' he asked carefully.
'Always,' she said in a heartbeat and saw the pain flash through his eyes. What was wrong with him?
She took his hand again, 'Five?'
He shook his head fighting away the pain, but it was obvious it wasn't of physical kind.
'That's not important right now. The only thing which is important is that you do as I tell you. First do not take two pills. Don't tell dad, take one and the second hide, alright?'
She blinked.
'Alright?' he asked his voice very demanding and a bit scary.
Vanya nodded, 'Alright.'
'Good,' he nodded too squeezing her hand reassuringly, 'Second, under any circumstances what so ever do you speak or get close to anyone named Leonard...,' suddenly he stood talking blinking several times before a horrified expression came over his face, 'What? Five, what is it? Who shouldn't I talk to?'
'I...I can't remember his name,' said Five slowly after a moment. He let go of her hand before his eyes widened, 'I'm an idiot. Jesus fuck, I'm such an idiot!' he snapped causing Vanya to flinch embarrassed as she never heard Five curse like that.
He looked over the room, 'I need something to write to a notebook, a piece of paper anything.'
Vanya stood up and looked over the small room before she found some paper and a pencil. Five instantly took it and started to write down something. She watched him feeling for the first since forever like they were in completely different worlds.
She knew better than to disturb him, but he was really scaring her now, 'F-five?'
'Can't talk, I need to figure this out first,' he said and Vanya nodded even though she wasn't pleased with the reply.
She looked around the room before her stomach let out an upset groan. She hadn't eaten almost anything at breakfast, 'I will go try to get us some food alright?'
'No!' he suddenly snapped looking up at her, the same desperation and sadness as before returning. When he spoke his voice was weak again, 'You can't leave me. Don't leave me...please'
Vanya opened her mouth to say she would be right back, but his eyes...they looked so scared.
She sat back down on the bed this time next to him, and put her head against his shoulder as he continued to write down formulas and equations which she didn't understand even if she peaked at the paper.
'I'm such an idiot, I will never fail to amaze myself,' he said after what felt like hours.
Vanya rose her head from his shoulder, 'Why?'
'Because I didn't just time travel, I completely changed the timeline which already happened which is causing me to forget the previous timeline. I thought that I time travelled in my old body so I wouldn't be affected by it, but this isn't my old body, it's my thirteen year old body which I got when I time travelled to 2019. The reason I didn't lose my memories then was because I wasn't at 2019 before not the first time at least.'
'You lost me completely,' said Vanya shaking her head feeling like she would get a headache soon if not from Five's words then definitely from the lack of food in her stomach.
He turned fully toward her.
'Careful,' she said minding his stitches.
'Vanya, I need a notebook. I need to write things down before I forget the timeline which already happened, but didn't happen yet,' he said concerned. Vanya wished she was brighter enough to understand what he was saying because so far she was as lost as ever.
'What will happen if you forget?' she asked slowly.
'I...I don't know. Best case scenario is I will simply go back to the mentality of my thirteen year old else before I first time travelled to the future.'
'And worst?'
'I will forget everything...everything at all,' he said and Vanya swallowed hard. Father warned Five about what could time travelling do to his mind. Could this be the punishment? Was he really losing his mind already with his talks about time travelling to the future and past and 2019? But then again she saw him teleported into the blue light and way he was now, all wounded and in dirty and dusty clothes not to mention the terrifying look in his eyes.
'H-How old are you?' she asked after a moment of thinking all of those things through not that she could fully process them yet, 'You said this is your thirteen year old body, but not your old one?'
He hesitated before he said, 'Fifty-eight.'
Vanya watched him for a moment before she crocked one eyebrow at him, 'Ah, so do I get to call you grandpa now?'
The shock on his face lasted for good two second before he chuckled and covered his face. For a moment she smiled thinking she finally calmed him down a bit before she heard the second sound. It wasn't a chuckle.
'I'm sorry, it was a joke-'
He pulled his hands from his face and shook his head a small tear rolling down his cheek, 'It's nothing, I'm sorry. I...I need a notebook. I need to write everything down before it will be erased from my memory.'
Vanya nodded even if she wanted to tell him that it wasn't nothing, and he should tell her, 'Alright.'
He grabbed her hand again, 'I-I know this is all too much, and too fast, but...I really need you to trust me...I can't...I can't do this without you.'
He was just so...broken Vanya felt like her heart was bleeding for him. What happened to him? What happened to that confident and cocky boy who made her laugh and never backed down?
She looked into his eyes. They looked so hurt. He was so hurt and not just on the body, but also on the mind and soul and Vanya didn't know how to help with those wounds. She wanted to. God, she wanted to help him so much, but she didn't know how and she was scared and confused by all the things she didn't understand.
She wanted to ask him about it all. She wanted him to tell her, but perhaps that was not what he needed right now, he needed a notebook and pen to write things down, so that was what she would give him.
'I trust you, Five,' she said with far more confidence than she thought she had left inside of her.
She watched as something shifted behind Five's eyes again, but for the first time since this broken boy pulled her into a crushing hug, it was something positive. He looked relieved and a bit grateful, so Vanya knew she was making the right call by waiting. Maybe all could be well...
The door despite being locked was suddenly broke open causing Vanya to jump from the bed and Five to kneel up to see who was the intruder.
Luther walked inside the room with his mask on before he looked to the corridor, 'Found them.'
'What happened?'
'Is Five really messed in the head now?'
'Why did you run?'
'What were you two lovebirds doing in the motel?'
'W-why did you run after h-him?'
She ignored all of her siblings and instead run to the medical room once Luther finally let go of her elbow as he dragged her like a caveman back to the house with Five wrestling with father all the way trying him to let them go screaming at him that he didn't understand and he had to write it all down. It was a horrifying image with people looking all around them before they finally got to the car.
'Vanya, wait!' called Ben.
'Let her go if she wants,' said Allison which was the last thing Vanya heard as she finally got to the hallway.
'A-a-a! Young lady, I told you all to stay downstairs,' said Grace as tried to hold her in place. Their usually nice and caring mother now gripping her arm a bit too tight.
Five's screams became louder and more violent as apparently he realized Vanya wasn't by his side anymore.
Vanya's ears almost bleed from Five's horrifying screams. It was impossible to listen to them. It was like he was being skinned alive, and it made her close her eyes feeling as if she was hurt along with him. It was like they bled the same.
'VANYA! No! I WANT TO SEE HER! Pleeeease let me see her! I need to see her!' filled the hallway and most likely the whole house.
She broke free from mom's hold and rushed to the medical room, 'Stop. Please. Let me be with him!' she screamed right before their father grabbed her elbow, 'Leave the room now! I will decide your punishment later, Number Seven.'
Vanya looked from her father's cold eyes to Five who looked her way and reached his arm for her.
'Vanya...Vanya Vanya please, don't...don't leave me again...,' he kept on repeating his voice softer this time, no more screaming as his eyes kept on hers.
She felt like she couldn't breathe. She needed to be there with him. He needed her. He looked so hurt and broke, she couldn't leave him, not when he was so desperate about staying.
She felt so powerless being held by the iron grip of Luther, Grace and now her father like she was cuffed or locked and she couldn't get out. Her mind brought her back to the dark room with no one around and no way out and she felt like screaming.
The monitor which they attached with electrodes to Five's head was beeping in a rhythmical sound probably recording his brain activity.
She heard her father tell her something probably more words about how she should leave and listen to him, but it was like the sound of his voice was fading into the background with the only thing with a clear sound in the room the rhythmical sound of the device. She felt strange. She felt like there was some kind of bubble filled with pressure inside of her growing and growing until it couldn't grow any further and just...burst.
'NO!' she screamed and suddenly a few bottles in the shelves broke all at once startling their father who took a step away from her almost as if he was the one who was afraid.
Vanya literally stamped her foot down feeling what felt for the first time in her life actually angry about her father's behaviour more than anything else.
'I'm not leaving him! I won't leave him alone!' she said upset and she would have sworn she felt the room shake a bit.
'Five needs me and wants me here. I'm staying,' she said finally surprised at her own boldness which was so unlike her she for a moment wasn't sure if she actually said it.
Her father looked over at Pogo who was still holding down Number Five who was trying to reach for her mumbling her name and calling for her.
'V-very well, number Seven,' said her father for the first time in Vanya's life sounding unsure about something.
'You...you may stay with number Five...for now,' he said and Vanya rushed toward Five without a second to spare, Pogo stepping aside so she could take his hand.
'Vanya?' asked Five sounding so tired all of the sudden all the fight inside him probably gone, now that he knew she was there and could stay.
'I'm here, Five. I'm always here,' she told him quietly hoping it would bring him some comfort to know he was not alone.
She heard her father tell Pogo what to do after that but he still sounded shaken. She ignored him keeping all her attention on Five who's eyes never left hers until the sedative kicked in and his eyes closed.
Old man or not, his eyes still made her feel the same...a connection, and belonging. Nothing and no one else in the whole house full of people ever did that for her. He made her feel like she was worth something and like she was a real person. He just...she couldn't explain what Five did exactly, maybe it was just that he included her into his life, but it was enough to make her feel real, cared for and...loved. The more she thought about it, the more it made sense, whatever love was...this must have been it.
She leaned her forehead down to his and pressed it against his as if somehow she could see what he was dreaming about right now and if possible making all the potential nightmares go away standing guard for him just like he did for her when he came to sleep next to her.
17 years after – old timeline
When they were younger Vanya always assumed she would be the damsel in the situation like this, not the hero, not like her siblings who could all take care of themselves in any situation and beat the bad guys saving the day. Vanya knew she wasn't like them, no matter how much she played pretend that she was. In her mind whenever Vanya logically looked at it, if she ever found herself in a heroic scenario, she would always be the damsel, victim, the one who needed saving. It proved to be true when she was mugged when she was twenty-five, when she was attacked by Hazel and Cha-cha a couple of days before and when Peabody kidnapped her.
Yet, now she didn't feel like a damsel. Not at all, she made the most heroic move of her entire life, and she had to say being a hero sucked.
It was a moment which felt like a lifetime, as Vanya looked over at the armed man she knocked out of her way with her uncontrollable powers. The gun was left on the ground. She just picked it up. She never held a gun before, but she watched in secret as their father showed her siblings how it was used. The safety was already off, so she just pointed it against the side of her face, her eyes landing on Five who had his back to her struggling with one of the guards. She remembered wishing he would turn around, but then she pulled the trigger before he would. It was better if he didn't see what she did. There was no pain, no agony, she didn't even hear the gunshot really or felt the bullet. There was just nothing, but the feeling of all that raging power in her veins suddenly being gone as if it was never there in the first place.
Vanya looked down at herself. She felt so strange like she was…just shallow…empty. Just nothing really. Not even the numbness from her pills ever made her feel like this.
Oh…so this was how being a ghost felt like.
'Vanya?' she heard a voice she hadn't in almost a decade.
'B-ben,' she breathed out and smiled. Ben, was here. He was looking almost the same as when he passed away, and even considering everything she felt a bit grateful that she got to see him now.
'Ben,' she said with the smallest painful smile, 'I missed you, so much.'
He was by her side in an instant and tried to take her hand.
'Oh,' she said as their hands went through each other. Apparently ghost couldn't find comfort even in each others' touches.
'Vanya, what did you do?' asked Ben his eyes so sad. It made her want to cry if she could, but it felt like her tears just…wouldn't come out.
She heard Klaus's desperate cries now. He was looking at her. So he really was sober now.
She watched as Five's head snapped to the direction she was standing, but with how unfocused his eyes were she knew he didn't see her. He looked right through her. It broke her heart more than anything in the world ever would.
I love you.
He said he loved her. All her life she wished for someone to say that to hear and mean it, and he did. She felt like cheated. She felt like the world pulled the last unfair move against her with all of this. All her life wanting powers to belong, only to get them and either end the world or end herself. All her life wanting find someone who would care for her for who she was, and now having that someone only to have to leave him.
How is this fair?
She pressed a hand against her chest as she realized all her life she wanted something and she actually had it, both the powers and Five, she just never realized it until it was too late.
'Vanya, this is not good. Why did you do that?' asked Ben.
'I didn't want to be the damsel for once,' she said and shrugged her shoulders, 'I…I couldn't' do it any other way. The Handler said…she said I would destroy the world. I always destroy the world,' said Vanya and shook her head before she stepped closer to Five who was holding her lifeless body in his arms cradling it with such love she had to shut her eyes. She couldn't keep on looking at this.
She loved him so much she never thought was possible. She never thought she was capable of loving someone like that let alone that someone returning her feelings.
'Vanya,' spoke Ben again always the voice of reason and honesty, 'You broke his heart.'
'I…I broke mine too,' she said as she opened her eyes watching Diego try to talk to Five but he wouldn't let him flinching away from him and standing up.
'I love you,' she whispered her voice shaking even if she knew he couldn't hear her.
She rose her hand and put it on his shoulder her eyes widened, 'Ben? I'm touching him.'
'What?' asked Ben confused as he tried to take a step closer, but Vanya was sure. She actually touched his shoulder, 'I'm touching hi-'
Suddenly she felt something very warm sucked her in.
17 years ago – now – new timeline
Vanya sat up confused and startled from the dream. Her fingers immediately started to exam the side of her head as if they were looking for an entry wound of a bullet, but there wasn't any. It was just a dream. Still, she couldn't help feeling so shaken by it even with Five soundly sleeping by her side in the medical room now. Could it be...could be...
No, it was just a dream caused by everything which happened that day. That was all. She looked over at Five's sleeping form before she laid back down, her hand reaching over to take his which was also leaning from his bed.
Grace prepared a bed right next to his. She would feel better if she could sleep in his, but Pogo warned her about pulling one of the wires to the machine, so she settled for being close and holding his hand. Father didn't look pleased, but he also didn't look as angry as before just lost in thoughts. She was half expecting him to cut her off dinner, but he order Grace to bring her something after the rest had dinner. She noticed Grace brought her pills after she fell asleep.
The memory of Five's words echoed in her mind. She took the pill and pretended to put it into her mouth as if someone was looking before she crushed it in her wrist turning it to white dust she then brushed against her PJs.
After that she linked her fingers with Five's hoping he would wake up soon her mind still a mess from all the questions she had running inside. For a moment she found herself once again touching the spot on the side of her head with her free hand. Still not bullet wound.
Just a dream...
A.N: So it's April the 3rd here so we survived the apocalypse. Yay?
I would like you thank you all for the AMAZING feedback I got through the course of this whole story and especially the last chapter because it was very emotional thing for me to write. I 'killed' characters before but never main ones and never in such brutal way that it really made me think about all of it. I know I started all of this with cute moments and then basically threw a bomb with the gunshot, but I really felt like doing so for this story to carry on.
Anyway, I hope you will find some clarity and answers in this chapter. I also hope you are still interested in reading the story even if I broke many of yours hearts.
To be honest this chapter and this new plot was one of three possibilities when I started writing for where the story would go, and this one was the one I decided to stick with. I know I changed so many things and basically threw the canon out of the window, I am not sure if this won't suck in the end. I hope not because writing this is super fun and interesting even if sometimes exhausting and sad. Still I have many things I want to let out before the final chapter. So far as you know I was mostly doing chapter with plots per day. Like a new chapter was usually happening the next day from the previous one except for the one where Vanya was kidnapped, now however I might skip a bit forward. The next chapter will be still the next day/days kind, but it is possible I will write the one after that which will be forwarded a couple of years into the future. This is something I have been thinking about lately and I think it might come out pretty good. I hope… ah anyway, enough about that.
Enjoy :)