As Nicholas made the somewhat lengthy walk from Kivar's chambers to one of the ship's lowest class quarters where they stuck Zan, he dwelled on several thoughts he didn't expect to ever have. The events of the previous few weeks were like a whirlwind. Since he mostly remained cut off from Kivar and anyone else from their star system after The Summit of 2000, he felt abruptly thrust back into his home world's affairs when he heard word of Kivar's ship arriving. At first, Nicholas found this exciting and correctly assumed that it could lead to an opportunity to shed his husk and return home at last.
Time moves much slower on Antar, and people age at a slower rate compared to life on Earth. Nicholas's people could live hundreds of Earth years, which is of course why Kivar and Larek and all the others waging the war that resulted in the deaths of the Royal Four still maintained their same roles despite the death of the Royal Four happening in the 1940s on Earth. If time passed the same way on Earth as it does on Antar, then Kivar and Larek and all of the others would've given way to a second—or possibly third—generation by now, nearly 80 years later. Nicholas's husk not only protected him from Earth's atmosphere, it also prevented his biology from succumbing to Earth's different time perspective. While Nicholas could conceivably return to Antar, ditch his husk and return to his typical form as if he'd aged his whole life on Antar, his perceptions and experiences on Earth all these years made up a significant chunk of his lifetime's worth of memories.
When Kivar's ship first arrived, Nicholas got fully briefed on the current political climate and why Kivar needed to commit the time and resources to personally come to Earth to retrieve the Granolith. He initially embraced these circumstances as highly fortunate because during so much of his time on Earth, Nicholas aimed to embody the qualities of a good soldier and a good leader to foil the Royal Four. For the first 50-60 years, Nicholas found it easier to stay mission-driven because he regularly heard from Kivar. Living with the other Skins in Copper Summit also allowed him to maintain a community and connection to home.
However, the last 20 years were different. With little contact with home and no other Skins in his life, Nicholas needed to bounce around foster care and other Earth families to survive. He never bonded closely with any of them, partly because they felt so alien to him and partly because he couldn't stay with any one family for more than a few years to ensure no one realized his husk never aged. He often took on the persona of the quiet, anti-social loner. Nicholas felt superior to humans, so rather than express that feeling and offend everyone or torture himself by pretending to enjoy spending time with humans, Nicholas chose to withdraw.
Nicholas tried to make the most of his life, realizing that he may never be recalled back home and his final husk would fail at some point in the 2050s. He read a lot and would sometimes look for clues to the whereabouts of Max and the others, but he wasn't equipped with the ideal resources to do that. While he never felt compelled to befriend a human, Nicholas still felt isolated and lonely at times. The dream of returning to Antar felt more and more like a pipe dream with each passing year.
The sudden reintegration into Antar affairs and a useful role to Kivar highlighted for Nicholas that much changed since he last lived on Antar. And that included Kivar. Nicholas knew Kivar could be cunning, ruthless and harsh, but he never saw Kivar so consistently angry. The years of intense war seemed to take their toll on Kivar, and Nicholas couldn't recognize any of the joys he took from his relationship with Vilandra and other hobbies back home. Nicholas reasoned that prolonged and brutal warfare could do that to probably just about anyone. He might share a similar outlook on life if he stayed on Antar instead of following the Royal Four to Earth. However, while aware of the state of the war for much of his time on Earth, Nicholas experienced it all from such a different perspective.
As Nicholas's pipe dream of returning home increasingly seemed possible, he began to question if reality would prove as fulfilling as the dream scenario he clung to all this time. Nicholas wondered how other people in his life changed, or how many of his friends and family lost their lives to the battle. He thought about how he may struggle to adjust returning to Antar in some ways. When Nicholas first arrived on Earth, the dream of returning to Antar involved quickly wiping out the Royal Four, coming home with the Granolith to help Kivar solidify his rise to power and crushing all of their enemies swiftly.
During those years of relative isolation, Nicholas dreamt of returning home to a world at peace and a high-ranking position in Kivar's kingdom as a reward for his loyal service. When the dream felt distant, Nicholas could easily overlook the fact that he knew the wars raged on and for more years than he ever would've anticipated before taking the Earth mission. As more time passed since Kivar arrived with his ship, he considered that trying to fit in with everyone worn down by years of relentless war could wind up being just as difficult as getting along with humans.
Nicholas arrived outside Zan's door. He came to retrieve Zan and take him to Kivar. Nicholas took a moment to clear his mind and prepare for a conversation with Zan. He opened the door and stepped inside.
"Nicky," Zan exclaimed. "I was wondering when you'd come!"
For a moment, it looked like Zan could charge the door like a dog looking to greet his owner, but Nicholas shot him a tentative look. Zan seemed to push any such notion away.
"Hi Zan," Nicholas greeted him with a slight smile.
"Are you here to give me a tour of the ship?" Zan asked eagerly. "Or take me to meet other friends of yours that are onboard? After everything you showed me of your home, I never thought I'd get the chance to see a ship like this."
"If I knew this would get you so excited, I would've told you that a ship was on the way much sooner," Nicholas said.
"So then what's the plan?" Zan asked with a beaming smile of enthusiasm.
Nicholas cracked a slight smile in return, "I'm here to take you to Kivar."
Zan's smile faded, and he suddenly looked nervous. The honor of escorting Zan to Kivar after Nicholas convinced Zan to willingly go with them at the general store didn't give him the type of joy and satisfaction it did with other prisoners.
"Oh," Zan said somberly, "I know you told me that Kivar is benevolent and reasonable, but it definitely seems like he's very much still at odds with my parents."
"That's because they don't do as Kivar wants," Nicholas explained in a sincere attempt to help Zan. "It'll be smart for you to cooperate with what Kivar asks of you."
Nicholas found it difficult to maintain the chummy illusion with Zan since he didn't know what Kivar would do once Nicholas brought Zan to him. Before Zan could appeal to Nicholas's friendship, he turned and went to a panel a few feet to the right of the door to Zan's quarters. He activated a communication channel.
"Tell Kivar I have the boy and we'll arrive at his chambers shortly," Nicholas relayed to a sentry posted outside Kivar's chambers.
"The boy?" Zan questioned, "Nicky…"
Nicholas didn't enjoy the look of heartbreak on Zan's face, but he felt embarrassed at the notion of Zan appealing to their friendship in front of Kivar. Nicholas figured it could also help Zan to clue him into how their friendship was Nicholas's mission.
"Come on," Nicholas gestured toward the door, "Kivar doesn't like to be kept waiting."
Zan didn't speak during the walk to Kivar's chambers. Nicholas sensed a nervous energy between them.
When Nicholas discovered Zan and Ava, he saw it as an opportunity to draw out Max and re-engage with Kivar. Upon doing so, Nicholas learned Kivar would arrive on Earth shortly. Even before the ship reached Earth, Kivar ordered Nicholas to befriend Zan. Of course, he didn't know Zan, so the assignment didn't bother Nicholas at first.
One of the aspects he enjoyed about the assignment was being able to talk so openly and freely about home with someone. And Zan provided a genuinely captive audience. Nicholas enjoyed that too and didn't quite realize just how much he liked playing the role of friend until a couple days ago when he arranged to meet Zan so he could trick him into coming to Kivar's ship. That plan nearly worked, but Max and Ava arrived at the last moment to prevent Zan from going with him.
At that time, Nicholas didn't let himself think too much about Kivar's plans for Zan. However he did feel somewhat bummed to end the façade. After all, that meant losing the aspects of their fake friendship that Nicholas found refreshing after not spending time with any of his own kind in years. He felt this made no rational sense since bringing Zan to Kivar would subsequently allow Nicholas to go home, where he could spend time with his actual friends and family. Nicholas tried to dismiss his feelings and chalk them up to weakness that rubbed off on him as a result of so many years spent around humans.
In many situations in his life, the honor of bringing Zan before Kivar would please Nicholas greatly. But he didn't feel that sense of pride and accomplishment this time. Instead he found himself feeling sympathy for Zan because of how foolish and naive he was for trusting Nicholas so easily and failing to heed the warnings of the Royal Four. Even as they neared Kivar's chambers, Nicholas felt pity for Zan's ignorance in not truly realizing that Nicholas served the function of bringing one of Kivar's enemies before the king.
Upon entering Kivar's chambers, Nicholas made a b-line to stand beside Kivar's seat.
"I've brought you the boy, your Majesty," Nicholas said.
"Excellent work," Kivar applauded him.
Then, Kivar turned his attention toward Zan. Nicholas stood beside Kivar watching the exchange while feeling uncharacteristically tense.
"Uh, it's nice to formally meet you," Zan offered.
Nicholas quickly mimicked the look of amusement on Kivar's face as they looked down on Zan.
"I suppose you wouldn't know, but you should always kneel before a king," Kivar advised cruelly.
Kivar reached out a hand and used his powers to force Zan to his knees. Zan winched in pain and then looked into Nicholas's eyes. Any look of amusement faded from Nicholas's face. He didn't enjoy seeing Zan struggle with both Kivar's physical dominance and the emotional disappointment of Nicholas's betrayal. Nicholas imagined at this point, Zan regretted his decision to willingly flee the general store with them.
"What do you want?" Zan asked Kivar with a slight quiver in his voice.
Kivar took a deep breath and answered Zan's question with a relatively calm tone, "I want you to tell me where the Granolith is."
Zan looked nervous. Nicholas wondered if that was because Max and Ava surely advised him not to divulge the Granolith's location, or if he didn't quite know what or where the Granolith is. Zan appeared either unwillingly or, more likely, incapable of providing an answer and made eye contact with Nicholas again.
"Things will go better for you if you just tell us," Nicholas advised.
While Zan turned his attention back to Kivar, he didn't provide an answer. Nicholas got the impression that fear paralyzed Zan into a silence he couldn't overcome.
Kivar rose and walked forward to Zan, who still knelt before him. Kivar placed a hand on Zan's forehead and began probing his memories. Nicholas watched with somewhat of a cringe as he knew neither Zan nor Kivar would notice. Zan struggled like someone who wanted to resist but didn't know how. Nicholas gave that look to some of the Royal Four and many others over the years, but he didn't directly cause or witness it on the face of someone who he got to know the way he got to know Zan.
After perhaps 30 seconds, Kivar pulled his hand back and took a seat once again.
"So," Kivar mused, "even your beloved parents didn't trust you with the Granolith's precise location."
"No," Zan stammered, "I don't know where it is, I swear."
"Yes, I know," Kivar said, with hints of both boredom and impatience in his voice. He didn't display an inkling of sympathy for Zan's clearly terrified body language. "You wouldn't have been able to hide it from me even if you had the knowledge. But we know it's somewhere near this Roswell location, something we already suspected since the Royal Four didn't appear to have it with them."
Zan seemed surprised that Kivar pulled that information out of him. Nicholas knew that someone stronger would see the memories being accessed flash before their eyes, but someone inexperienced with forceful mind probing like Zan sometimes felt so emotionally violated by the experience that they failed to perceive what specific information they gave up.
"On your feet, boy," Kivar commanded.
"Wait," Nicholas blurted out, as Zan obediently stood up just as Kivar asked.
"What is it, Nicholas?" Kivar asked.
That anger returned to Kivar's voice, though he did not raise it. He clearly didn't expect or appreciate Nicholas interjecting.
"What are you planning to do with him?" Nicholas asked after a brief pause.
Kivar sighed. "I'm going to kill him."
"Wait, What?!" Zan became exasperated.
Nicholas figured Zan didn't see that coming. Of course Nicholas knew from the moment Kivar asked Zan to stand what that meant. In scenarios like this, Kivar preferred to kill a prisoner on their feet. What Nicholas didn't quite expect was how strongly he felt compelled to do something when Zan's execution appeared imminent. He knew he felt some unease, but, as that moment arrived, Nicholas felt an intense urge to stop it.
Kivar looked suspiciously at Nicholas, and it felt like a probing stare as if Kivar struggled to understand why Nicholas stopped him from killing Zan. Nicholas needed a moment to come up with a suitable reason for his request to pause on Zan's execution. Luckily, Nicholas exceled when he needed to think on his feet.
"The Royal Four have a strong emotional attachment to the boy," Nicholas explained. "It could take precious time and resources to scour the large area around Roswell. If we can locate Max Evans and the others, they'll take us right to the Granolith in exchange for Zan here. Once we get the Granolith, then we can kill all of them before returning home."
Kivar took a moment to consider Nicholas's line of thinking. Then, he smiled devilishly.
"I like it," Kivar declared. "I never should've doubted your capacity to devise such a crafty strategy, Nicholas."
Nicholas fought to mask the feeling of relief he experienced. He still wanted to stay in Kivar's good graces and return to Antar. However Nicholas didn't want to watch Zan die in front of him. Maybe Kivar would ultimately leave with the Granolith and not take the time to locate and kill the Royal Four. Or maybe just killing Zan without Nicholas around would make it easier for him to push it out of his mind and focus on reclaiming his old life.
"Take the boy back to quarters," Kivar instructed.
For the first time all day, Nicholas complied with an order he wanted to follow.