Chapter Eighteen: Finally Home
The ride back was tediously long as we pulled the makeshift cart behind us. It would be worth it, but I was more than ready to get home. Our saving grace was that the silence that had filled the space between us on our way out here was now filled with talking and laughter and even a few tears. The tears were from me, of course.
"It's your turn to sleep." Rick told me as we made camp for the night.
"Maybe." I smiled as I set the traps to warn us of walkers.
He stepped up to me, sighing with concern, "You need sleep, Caroline."
"I know." I nodded. "I just – I don't sleep well out in the open anymore."
"Anymore?"
Nodding again, I smiled up at him, "I used to sleep like a baby when I was out here all alone. It was just me and Mozzie. Only then I met Ben."
"What changed?" He asked.
Sighing, I started to put together a small fire, "I had a family again. I focused so hard on keeping them alive that sleep took a backseat. I needed to protect them and I'd do whatever I had to."
"It's not like that anymore." He told me as he brought over a can of baked beans.
"Isn't it?" I asked him. "There are still people who need to be protected. People who can't defend themselves as well as they should." I went on. "People that I've grown to care about."
He nodded, "We can look after ourselves."
"I know." I smiled. "I do know that, Rick. But it still doesn't change the fact that I want to watch over and protect people."
He smiled, "You found yourself."
"I did." I told him. "I went dark but with the help of Ben and Michonne and Daryl and Maggie and you," I added and grinned at him, "I found myself again. Who I'm supposed to be."
"Good." He nodded. "That's good."
"It is good." I replied.
Once the fire was going, we heated some of the beans, eating fruit while we waited. There were even a few boxes of granola bars that we had decided were our consolation prize for going through what we went through. Then as the sky started to darken, we were quiet as I started to journal for a while, writing all my thoughts down until I couldn't concentrate anymore. Fatigue was starting to set in and I caught Rick smiling at me more than once.
"Fine." I finally smiled at him. He raised a brow at me. "I'll sleep."
He chuckled lightly, "It's about time."
Settling down, I rested my head on my arm, looking at Rick across the fire. "Thank you, Rick."
"For what?" He asked.
"For not being the asshole I really wanted to think you were." I smirked at him.
He laughed moving across the fire and sitting next to me. "Go to sleep."
Curling into myself, I sighed and shut my eyes, falling asleep quickly.
Waking to the rattling of cans, I shot up, grabbing my knife from the sheath at my thigh. Rick was already on his feet, his knife in a walkers head. Another one was moving toward him, reaching its arms out. Darting forward, I stabbed it through its temple, letting it fall as I readied myself for the next one. Listening to the woods, it was quiet. Looking at Rick, I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. My eyes felt heavy and puffy.
"How long was I out?" I asked him.
"Not even an hour." He replied sadly.
Nodding, I went back to the sleeping bag, "That would explain the lingering exhaustion."
"Go back to sleep." He told me kindly.
"No, no, I'm good." I stated. "Maybe we should just keep going."
He smiled and stepped up to me, "Linny."
"Rick."
"You need to sleep." He stated. "If something does happen, I need you to be able to handle it."
Frowning, I crossed my arms, "I can handle anything. Even if I'm tired."
He smiled, "I know."
"So don't doubt me now."
He nodded, "Okay."
"Okay."
He chuckled before he sat down, patting the bag next to him. Sighing, I sat down, narrowing my eyes at him. He simply looked at me with a knowing expression. Smiling, I laid down with my back against him. I twitched as he put his hand on my thigh, resting his arm across the length of me. Taking a deep breath, I shut my eyes, falling asleep again with more ease than I thought I would.
When I woke up, Rick's arm was around me, his chest pressed against my back. For a moment I tensed, not sure how I felt about it. His body heat was nice. I'd gotten the opportunity to grow accustomed to it, and it was definitely something I would miss if I didn't have it. But I didn't feel anything romantic toward Rick and it made me feel awkward letting us stay this way.
Putting my hand over his, I attempted to gently move his arm from me. Though as soon as I touched him, he was already waking up, momentarily gripping me tighter before he swiftly removed his arm, sitting up and running his hand down his face. Doing the same, I ran my fingers through my hair, offering him a smile.
"How'd you sleep?" He asked.
"Amazingly. Thank you." I replied.
He nodded, "Ready to get moving again?"
"Yeah." I nodded and got to my feet.
Handing him some jerky for breakfast, we started to load everything up, getting the cart ready. Mounting, I waited for Rick to finish whatever it was that he was doing, finally mounting next to me. Smiling, we started out again, happy to be moving. I loved riding. I always had. There was something about the movement of a horse that I found comforting.
Going a different way than we'd come, we passed a field and to our great surprise, we came across a field of cows. There were several carcasses but all in all everyone was looking pretty healthy. Stopping the mare, Rick was forced to stop with me.
"Seriously?" He asked.
"Meat. Milk." I stated. "And…" I said meeting his eyes.
"And what?" He smirked.
"There is something I've always wanted to try." I grinned at him. He just frowned at me. "Come on."
Dismounting, I rushed to the fence, dipping between the barbed wire before walking toward the nearest cow. They'd been eating well and I had no doubt that they would taste amazing. Not only that but we'd be able to get some milk out of them. Reaching out for one, I had to step back as it kicked at me. They'd been on their own so long that they had become skittish. Moving to another, I was met with the same results. I approached nearly a half dozen before I found one that wasn't going to run away or kick at me.
"Linny!" Rick called after me.
"Come on!" I called back to him.
He shook his head, making his way toward me, "Are you kidding me right now?"
"Nope." I beamed at him. "I'm going to ride a cow."
"You grew up on a farm and you're telling me you've never ridden a cow?"
"My dad didn't like the idea and when my sister tried and nearly got trampled, we were officially forbade from trying it ever again."
"Sister?" He replied.
"I'm the middle of three." I stated.
"That explains a lot." He nodded.
"Meaning?" I frowned at him, stroking the cows head, feeling drool going across my arm.
"You take care of people. You mediate." He replied.
I nodded at him. "But what you don't know is that I also know how to have a shit ton of fun." I told him, grinning again. "Now let's ride a cow."
He laughed and nodded. Shrieking a little with excitement, I went to the side of the cow and quickly leapt up onto it before it could move. Though the second after I'd made it up, I was lying in the mud. Laughter burst from him like I'd never heard before.
"It's not easy." I smiled getting up. "Now you try."
We both rushed to the cows nearest us and launched ourselves onto their backs. Being launched off repeatedly, I was once again sitting on the ground, looking up as Rick strutted over on top of a cow. A cow that seemed to be perfectly happy with its situation.
"How the hell did you beat me?" I grinned up at him, getting to my feet again.
"I'm just awesome like that." He smirked down at me.
Looking at him, I just grinned, "I don't think so."
Smacking the cow's ass, it bucked, sending him to the ground. Laughing harder than I had in god knew when, I stumbled as I moved to run from him. Looking over my shoulder, I was met with mud in the face, making me shriek before I was hit again. Stumbling, in the next second he had my waist, spinning me repeatedly before I felt him trip, sending us both to the ground. Bursting with laughter, I was on top, bracing myself on either side of him. Still laughing, I tipped my head back before meeting his eyes. He looked at me for a long moment, his hands gripping my arms.
Beaming down at him, I raised a brow, "We are not leaving until we successfully get on a cow and race across this field."
His hands gripped my sides, making me scream as they lit up, finding myself now underneath him. "Then what the hell are you waiting for?"
He got off of me and started to sprint toward a cow. Yelling after him, I got up, doing the same. Failing the first time, I finally managed to get on and stay on a cow. Finding it much harder than I had anticipated, I managed to lead it to one side of the field. Rick was already there looking rather cocky. I didn't care though. He was having fun. That's all that mattered.
"Ready?" I grinned at him.
"The real question is, are you?" He grinned back.
I dipped my chin, "I was born ready."
In the next second, we kicked them and they lurched forward, racing across the field, we were nearly to the other end when Rick's cow bucked and sent him to the ground. Reaching the fence, I threw my hands in the air.
"I win!" I called to the sky, laughing as I looked at Rick. Resting myself against the cow, I hugged it. "Thank you." Sliding from its back, I stepped up to Rick, putting my hands on my hips as I looked down at him. "I am officially cow riding champion."
He laughed and reached his hand out to me. "Well earned."
Gripping his arm, I helped him to his feet, "Okay. I guess we've had enough fun for one day."
He smiled, nodding, "Grab a couple and hit the road?"
"Yup. But not these guys. They earned their freedom." I told him.
He laughed and gently shoved me as we made our way back to the horses. Grabbing rope, I made two makeshift halters before finding two of the friendliest cows I could, leading them to the gate and out onto the road. Attaching them to either side of the cart, talking to them all the while, we were finally on the road again.
"Thank you." Rick told me after a few minutes.
"For what?" I smiled at him.
"Having fun with me." He stated. "I can't remember the last time I've had that much fun."
"Me neither." I told him, taking a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It's a good day."
Despite how dirty we had become, it really was a good day. The sun was out. The sky was clear. Rick and I had finally reconciled. The only thing that could make it better was to finally be back at the prison. The anxiousness I felt to get there made the sight of it all the more relieving. Seeing it in the distance sent a sense of home flowing over me. This trip had started rough but ended so well that I thought I was actually going to be able to be happy. This was a turning point.
Rick stopped his horse, sighing before he looked at me, "Almost home."
"Finally." I smiled at him.
"Then you can get back to avoiding me." He smirked.
Laughing, I shook my head, "I think I can officially stop doing that."
"Good." He nodded. "Because I didn't like it."
"You weren't supposed to like it." I smirked at him.
He nodded, "I'm still sorry. I'll probably forever be sorry for it."
Sighing, I shook my head at him, "Let it go, Rick. That's what I plan on doing. Dwelling on the past won't help us in the future."
"That's a good way to look at it." He nodded.
"It is. I'm going to do my best to put it behind us. But I can't deny that there may be moments when I can't."
"I accept that."
Smiling, I cocked my head at him, "I feel a little more put together. Thank you for that."
"Me, too. Thank you." He told me.
Smiling wider, I stroked the mare's neck, "Let's go home."
Moving forward, as soon as the trees gave way, people were rushing toward the gate. Grinning, I was completely anxious and excited to get past them and to see everyone. We came back with a shit ton of food and with the cows, I'd say we were a hundred and ten percent successful.
"It's about damn time." Daryl said as he closed the gate behind us.
Passing through the second, I dismounted and turned in time to embrace him, laughing as he hugged me tightly. "I know. But we made a pit stop that was very much needed. Not to mention well-deserved after everything we went through and found."
He nodded, "Tell me all about it."
"Over a drink?" I replied as I wrapped my arm around his waist.
"Hell yeah." He smiled.
Looking at Rick, he smirked, helping me lead the horses back to the barn. Daryl followed, listen as Rick and I talked back and forth, actually laughing, watching as Rick and I unloaded the animals before recruiting him and others to help with the cart. When it was done, we finally made our way to our cell block, feeling like we could finally rest.
"We stink." I stated.
"You more than me." He smirked. "You were on the ground more than I was."
Laughing, I put my hand on his arm, nodding. "I'm ready to get cleaned up."
"Me, too." He said and disappeared.
Momentarily leaning against the wall, I went over the trip in my head, wrapping my head around the fact that I didn't hate him anymore. Carol had been right. A weight had been lifted and it felt amazing.
Grabbing clothes, I went to the showers, finding him already there. "As an upgrade, we should really build some more private showers."
He chuckled, the water running down his chest, "I don't know." He replied as he looked me up and down.
"Stop it." I smirked and shoved him.
"You weren't shy when I first met you." He smirked back at me.
"I'm still not." I replied. "Doesn't mean I want everyone looking."
He laughed lightly, turning away from me. Appreciating his discretion, I showered for as long as I possibly could, Rick having left several minutes before I was done. But showering made me feel like a million bucks after being coated with all that mud and whatever else was in the mud. Having finally finished and pulled on clothes, I went to find Maggie, ending up in one of the towers that she was keeping watch in.
"Not having fun with everyone else?" I asked her.
She smiled, hugging me, "It's getting crowded."
"It is." I smiled.
"You came back with a lot." She stated. "How was it?"
"It was annoying, then hard, then scary, and then…it was pretty damn good." I smiled at her.
"Details." She grinned at me.
Laughing, I nodded, telling her everything. Down to the very last detail. She was one of few that I could bare my soul to and would never be judged and always loved. Not to mention she had excellent advice and she was my best friend. I adored her with all of me.
By the time I was done, we were down by the fire, enjoying dinner with everyone else. It really was getting crowded but it wasn't a bad thing. Several cell blocks had been cleared, reinforced, and made into homes for those we had brought in. They were good people. All of them. They deserved a better life and if we could offer that than we would.
Conversation had died down, making it quiet, when Maggie nudged me, "I'm glad you two are doing better."
"Me, too." I replied. "It definitely makes me feel less bogged down. I finally feel lighter. I'm free." I told her, smiling fondly.
"Hey." Daryl said coming up to us with a bottle in hand, showing it to me.
"It is time for that drink?" I grinned at him.
"Get your ass up and let's go." He told me with that gruff voice of his.
Smiling at Maggie, I stood, "I'll see you later."
Stepping away from her, an arm moved around my waist, lips against my ear, "Don't have too much fun."
Laughing, I shoved Glenn away from me, watching him take his place at Maggie's side. Looking at Daryl, he nudged me as I fell in step with him. Walking to where we could be alone, not wanting to share, he made us our own little fire, settling down next to it.
"So what did you two do out there?" He asked.
"Looted. Found some goods. Played with cows." I smirked at him.
He nodded, taking a drink, "So are you two like…together now?"
"What?!" I exclaimed, taking the bottle from him. "No. Not in the slightest." I added with furrowed brows, taking a drink.
He nodded. "Good."
"Did you think I slept with him out there? Is that what you're getting at?" I asked. He didn't say anything. "Wow. I'm glad you think so highly of me."
"I didn't mean it like that." He replied as we passed the bottle back and forth. "You two were enemies when you left and best friends when you got back."
"Well, what about you and Carol?" I shot at him. "Have you two ever slept together?" He shot me a look back at me. "Same thing, buddy. Don't jump to conclusions."
"Sorry." He told me.
"It's fine." I told him. "And we're not best friends. Rick and I are in a better place. That's where it ends. It's not like I'm going to jump into anything with him."
"He likes you."
"He can like me all he wants. Doesn't mean I'm going to like him back."
He offered me a small smile, "Good."
I narrowed my eyes at him, "You don't – you don't feel that way about me do you?"
"Nah." He smiled. "Doesn't mean I want you to be with anyone else either."
Laughing, I shook my head at him, "So possessive."
"I've lost enough people in my life. I just don't want to feel like I've lost you."
"Never, Daryl." I told him with seriousness. "Never."
"Alright." He said taking a swig before handing it over.
Taking a long drink, I smiled at him, "So, tell me what I've missed."
He shook his head, "Nothing. Same old, same old."
"Really?" I asked with a raised brow. "Nothing happened?"
"Nah, Linny." He replied. "I want to hear about your trip."
Smiling, I nodded at him, "We fought with each other. We fought some walkers. I finally told him my story. We rode some cows and now we're home."
He smirked, "You gotta do better than that."
Laughing, I nodded and told him a much more detailed version. I didn't know why he wanted to know so badly but he did. I wasn't about to deny him. Though, for wanting to know so bad he didn't seem to like the majority of it.
"You almost look jealous." I stated as I downed more of the liquor.
"Nah." He said and waved my comment off.
"Good." I stated.
"It's nice though." I told him softly, getting him to look at me. "Not hating him anymore. It definitely makes me feel freer."
He nodded, "I know."
"But you're my person, Daryl." I added. "You and Maggie."
He smiled and nodded at me, "Yeah. Same."
I smiled and shook my head, "A man of few words."
Come morning, I woke up pressed against Daryl's chest. His arm was around me, the sound of his steady breathing against my ear. His heart underneath it. Feeling warm, I sighed, nestling closer to him, only to fly out of my skin as my leg was hit. Daryl's arm was across me a second later, his knife out as we looked up at whatever was attacking us.
"Jesus." I said as I looked up at Hershel.
"Good morning, sunshine." He smiled.
"Hey." I said and rubbed Daryl's back, running my fingers through my hair before I got to my feet. "Nothing happened." I told him.
He chuckled lightly, "I wasn't assuming anything, Caroline."
"That's what makes you the best dad ever." I grinned and pressed a kiss against his cheek.
"Come on." He said. "Fill me in on what happened."
"Maggie didn't tell you or anything?" I frowned as we headed back toward the main part of the prison.
"I want to hear it from you."
"Why?" I asked. He shot me a look. "Sorry."
"Rick seems to have changed his whole mood around." He stated.
"We had a good trip." I told him.
Daryl appeared at my side, pressing a kiss into my hair before he moved past us, putting plenty of distance between us and him.
"What's going on with you two?"
"Which two?"
"Daryl."
"Nothing and you know it." I told him. "He's one of my best friends."
"Linny!" Michonne said coming forward.
Wrapping my arms around her, I made a soft noise, hugging her tightly. "It's good to see you."
"You, too." She told me.
Smiling, I tilted my head at her, "You're not going to make me retell my story a third time are you?" She laughed, only then I did a double-take as Patrick walked by us. "Hey." I said immediately gripping his arm. There were cuts, bruises, and scrapes covering much of his visible skin. His glasses were askew and dirty. "What the hell happened?"
"Nothing." He told me anxiously.
"Bullshit." I frowned. "Where is she?" He averted his eyes. "Patrick." I said exasperatingly as I dragged my fingers through his hair. "Why do you keep doing this?"
He just smirked at me, "She's amazing."
Sighing, I nodded, gently pushing him away from me. Taking a deep breath, I looked at Michonne. Shaking my head, I went from fine to pissed off in a matter of seconds, starting to walk toward the one place I knew she would be.
"Linny." Michonne said following me.
"I thought Maggie was going to keep an eye on her." I shot at her.
"She did." She replied. "But you know how she is."
Sighing, I nodded again, "I do know. I wish I didn't, but I do."
She laughed lightly, nudging me, "You know that's not true."
"Why is it that every time one of us brings someone in it's as if they are immediately our responsibility?" I frowned at her. "Can't they just be a part of the group? Why do I feel like I have to babysit every person I bring in?"
"Because that's who you are. You're a good person." She replied.
My anger started to ebb, only to intensify as Daryl moved toward us, gripping the arm of the most infamous teenager in the prison. "What the hell, Ray?" I shot at her.
"What?" She frowned, not meeting my eyes.
"I'm gone for a few days and you just can't keep your shit together?" I went on. She just shrugged at me. "No." I said gripping her arm and dragged her toward the gates.
All eyes were on me as I moved toward the gardens and animals. Shoving her toward the toolshed, glaring at her all the while, I watched as she gathered what she would need. She knew what we were here for. That was probably part of the problem. She knew what her punishment was and it didn't matter to her anymore. But I had to do something. She was only sixteen and the ending of the world had made her angry and bitter and just an unpleasant person to be around. I wanted to help her. I wanted her to get better and be an asset to the community. But all she wanted to do was shoot a gun and run off in the woods. She wanted to be an adult and she was the furthest from it. Mika was more of an adult than she was.
"Why do you keep making me do this?" I asked her with an edge of sadness.
"You clearly like it." She replied under her breath.
"Knock it off." I told her exasperatingly.
She was on the ground, pulling weeds, but got to her feet and frowned at me, "You're not my mom, Caroline."
Frowning back, I stepped toward her, "You're right, Ray. I am not your mom. Your mom was the woman I told that I would look out for her little girl. The woman who you lead into a walker hoard and got killed." She deflated and started to weed again. "Listen, I get that you're angry. I'm angry, too. You aren't the only one who lost someone out there. You aren't the only one who resents the way the world is."
"Yeah. Whatever." She replied.
I could feel my anger and frustration in my throat. I needed to step away. "I need to check on a couple things. Keep weeding. If I come back and you aren't here or if the job isn't getting done, there will be hell to pay."
"Gonna go get someone else blown up?" She retorted.
I couldn't take it anymore. Turning, I quickly walked away, going back inside and to my cell. Pacing it, shaking out my hands as I cracked my neck, I rolled my shoulders to try and calm myself down.
"You okay?" Rick asked, making me jump.
Frowning, I shook my head, "I am fed up, Rick. I cannot be responsible for her anymore. She is vicious and pushes every one of my buttons. I haven't had one happy moment with that girl and she is driving me crazy."
"There have been a few happy moments." He smirked at me.
Sighing, I dropped onto my bed. He came and sat next to me, his leg pressing against mine. "It's not getting any better, Rick. She's not getting any better."
"It's only been a month."
"Six weeks." I told him. "Six. Weeks. Most people come around in a matter of days. She's just…not."
"She's got you. She'll be okay." He said gently rubbing my back.
Looking at him, I took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, "I'm not sure that's enough anymore."
He put his hand against my hair, pulling me to him as he pressed a kiss against my forehead. "It is."
Gripping his thigh, I nodded at him, "Maybe. Either way, today she's getting to me. Today her words hurt."
"Linny." Mika said rushing into view. "They need you in the field."
Giving Rick a knowing look, I stood and was running. Going back outside, there were several people in the field. Ray was screaming, attempting to swing the garden rake at Daryl. Maggie and Michonne were there as well, Hershel making his way. Passing him, Carl was close to me and I could see red on the side of his face.
"Carl!" I yelled, rushing around him, taking his head in my hands. "What happened?"
"I told her no." He replied.
Anger was free flowing now as I looked back at Ray. Rushing forward, pushing through the others, I gripped the rake as she swung it toward me. Her eyes met mine and for a moment I thought she was almost afraid and regretful of her actions. Only then she screamed and tore it from my grip, swinging it again. Leaping back, one of the spikes caught my shirt, ripping it open.
"Linny!" Daryl yelled, darting toward me only to drop as Ray swung it yet again.
"What is the matter with you?!" I yelled at her. "You're hurting people, Ray!"
She stopped, frowning at me, "What makes you think I care?"
"Because you're better than this." I told her. "You're not a bad person, Ray."
She just frowned harder at me, "Tell that to my mother."
She turned to walk away but I gripped her shoulder, "Don't walk away from me."
"Just leave me alone!" She yelled and spun again.
A gasp escaped me as I gripped the handle of the rake as it collided with my abdomen, the spikes imbedding in my skin. Then there was a flurry of action as I fell to my knees, almost immediately feeling hands against me. Ray was screaming but I couldn't concentrate on her as both panic and pain pulsed through me.
There were voices coming from all sides, only then my head was taken and I finally focused on the person in front of me. "Caroline."
"Told you so." I smirked at Rick.
"Linny?" Carl said from next to me.
Meeting his eyes, I smiled, putting my hand against his face, "I'm fine."
"Caroline." Hershel said and Rick moved from in front of me.
"It's not so bad." I told him, gripping his shoulder. "I think it just surprised me more than anything."
He gave me a look, "You have four spikes sticking in your skin."
I laughed, only to have pain move through me, "Ow."
"Linny." Rick said taking my hand.
Squeezing it, I nodded as he helped me to my feet. "It's not so bad."
"Let's get her back to the cell block. I can't treat her out here."
"It's superficial." I told him.
He nodded, "I'll decide that when we get back inside."
Rolling my eyes, I gripped the handle and yanked the rake from my body. I groaned but smiled as I handed the rake to Hershel. "I wish we had tetanus shots." Both of them were looking at me with both shock and concern. "Okay, I need to flush and disinfect." I said before looking at Rick. "Help me?"
He nodded and followed me, "That was stupid."
"Did Daryl take her to the holding cells?" I asked.
He nodded, "Where she belongs."
Keeping my hand over the puncture wounds, my blood was annoyingly warm and they were bleeding more than I thought they would.
Hershel caught up to us, frowning at me, "I wish you would have let me do that."
"They are superficial."
"And they tend to bleed more."
"Yeah." I said looking down at them, seeing the red on my hand. Rick's arm found my waist and he pulled me against him. "I'm not going to fall over." His grip tightened. "Rick." I said making him look at me. "I'm fine."
"Linny." Daryl said walking toward us.
"Is she okay?" I asked stepping away and swiftly moved to him.
He nodded, taking my face in his hands, "Are you?"
"Superficial." I smiled at him.
"Can't take you down that easily." He smirked.
"Nope." I grinned.
He wrapped his arm around my neck, pulling me to him, "Come on. Let's get you fixed up."
Wrapping my arm around his waist, I leaned into him, "Okay."
Sitting on my bed, I leaned back; taking a swig of liquor as Daryl meticulously flushed and put antibiotic ointment into each of the four puncture wounds. Only groaning a few times, I managed to take it without becoming a difficult patient. I only cried out when he started to wrap them, pressing against them to make sure it was tight enough.
"Phew." I smiled when he was done. "Help me up." Gripping his arms, I stood without bending my stomach, already annoyed. "Thank you." I said kissing his cheek. "Hey." I said as I practically ran into Hershel.
"Here." He said handing me pills and a bottle of water.
"Thank you." I smiled, kissing his cheek before taking the meds.
He nodded, "Let me know if you have any symptoms that should be concerning."
Smiling, I nodded, "Okay. Thank you, Hershel."
Moving past him, my hand was still against my abdomen as I strutted toward the holding cells. Daryl was right behind me as we reached them. Gently pulling on his hand, he looked at me, nodding before he hung back, letting me approach her cell alone. Opening the door, I crossed my arms as I leaned against the doorframe. She looked up at me, her cheeks wet with tears and her eyes were red.
"So, thoughts on today's events?" I asked her.
"I'm sorry." She told me and started to cry again.
All of me wanted to rush in and comfort her, but I stayed back, knowing that I couldn't do that. Not yet.
"I am so sorry, Linny." She said and met my eyes. "I don't know what to do."
I shook my head at her, "You don't have to know what to do. That's kind of what I'm here for. I will help you if you'd just let me, Ray. I want to see you through this but you aren't doing yourself any favors. You're only making it ten times harder. We're not your enemy here. We're trying to be your family but you won't let us."
"I killed my family." She said sadly, growing distant. "I don't want to get close to someone else only to lose them again." Sighing, I stepped forward, carefully sitting down next to her. "I'm so sorry, Linny." She told me again. "I didn't mean to hurt you."
"I know." I told her, leaning against the wall. "I know that deep down you're actually a decent human being." I added, smirking at her.
She laughed, wiping the tears from her cheeks. Leaning against the wall next to me, she took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "I know I'm screwed up." She told me. "I know it. I get it. I'd like to say that I can change, but…I'm just not sure I can."
"You can, Ray." I told her. "You just need to try."
She nodded, "Okay."
Then I was frowning at her, "And stop trying to hurt people. Whether you realize it or not your words hurt. They hurt people. Now it's grown from not only verbal but to physical. You hurt Patrick. You hurt Carl. You hurt me."
"I know." She nodded.
"I get wanting to hurt me. I'm nothing but a pain in your ass that won't let you get away with anything. But everyone else does not deserve your wrath. And I can tell you right now that if you ever lay a hand on Carl again I will kill you myself." I added, talking fast. "Do I make myself clear?"
She nodded, "Yes."
"Good!" I yelled, rolling my shoulders before taking a deep breath. "God, Ray. You frustrate the living hell out of me. Your words hurt and you push me away at every turn. I get not wanting to lose anyone else. I've been exactly where you are. I've been there, Ray, and I know what it feels like."
"How did you get over it?" She asked.
"By letting people in." I replied softly. "I let people in, Ray, and that's how I got past it. That's how I managed to move on and get better and grow stronger. People are what matter. People are how we survive this apocalyptic world. You just need to realize that and to try. Even if it's just a little at first. Do that and things will get better. Can you do that?"
"Yeah." She nodded. "I can."
"Thank you." I told her, taking a deep breath again. "I would very much appreciate it."
"I'll do better." She repeated.
Patting her leg, I awkwardly got off of the bed, moving toward the door before I turned back to her. "You're staying in here until I say otherwise."
"Linny." She frowned as she stood. "Please."
"No." I told her, holding up my hand. "You need to think about your actions and make a new plan on how you're going to be a part of this group."
"Care." She said sadly.
Smiling, I shook my head, "Sorry, kid, but you're stuck here."
"Can I have something to keep me busy?" She asked.
"Nope." I told her. "Three days with nothing except food, water, and your own thoughts to occupy your time."
"Please?" She said pleadingly.
Frowning, I crossed my arms, feeling the wounds twinge, "How are you going to learn your lesson if I simply let you have what you want? How is giving you amenities going make you see that you can't keeping going on the way you've been going? How am I supposed to prepare you for this world when you refuse to let me?" I paused, taking in her defeated expression. "So, no, Ray. You do not get anything unless you can prove to me that you've earned it. I've been lax considering how you came to be here but I'm done. I'm done trying to be nice and kind and understanding. We both know I haven't been very nice or kind when it comes to you. But my god I've tried to be understanding and to show you the way. I'm done. I'm over it. Now, you can get the light side or the dark side of me. I can tell you that the dark is darker than you've ever seen."
She smirked at me, a tear sliding down her cheek, "Star Wars?"
"There is nothing wrong with Star Wars." I pointed at her.
She nodded, "I know."
"Good." I smiled. "Now get some sleep. I need to find some pain meds."
"I really am sorry, Linny."
"I know." I told her. "But whenever you decide to get all fired up, I'm going to lift my shirt and show you what you did. Rein it in, Ray. Rein it in or I'll do it for you. And that will be considerably less fun."
She laughed lightly, "Okay."
Stepping toward her again, I pressed a kiss against her forehead, "Rest."
She nodded. Smiling, I ran my hand down her hair before I left, closing her in. Taking a deep breath, I walked away from the door, looking up at Daryl. He smiled, nodding as he wrapped his arm around me.
"It's been a busy day and it ain't even noon yet."
"And I'm exhausted." I said resting my head against his chest. He laughed, pulling me tighter against him. "She's gonna be okay."
"I know." He said rubbing my arm.
Going back to my cell, I laid down, grabbing some jerky. I was alone for only a few minutes when I heard steps. Shutting my eyes I attempted to ignore them, feeling the bed shift as they rolled over me. Opening my eyes, I met those of Maggie, smiling as she smiled back at me. Grinning, I shook my head, taking another bite of jerky.
"Our lives are weird." I told her.
She laughed, "Yeah. They really are."
"She didn't act up while I was gone?" I asked her.
"Nope." She replied. "She always saves her outbursts for you."
Sighing, I shook my head, "Who knew because of one act of kindness I'd have to keep track of the most unruly sixteen year old in existence?"
"That's family for you." She replied, smiling at me. "Welcome home."