A/N: Happy Weekend! Weekend also means another update! Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter and for the follows! I'm glad you're continuing to enjoy it!

Let's see what goes on in Millie's head.

Elvish translations:

Arwenamin: My lady

Aier: Little One/Short One.

Chapter Nine

Acceptance

Thranduil's healing certainly seemed to work, but I was still out of sorts over the following few days. The infection hit me a lot harder than I expected, which surprised me at first, but upon further reflection there might be another explanation. I am not an expert on the subject but, even though my mind has accepted this new reality I'm in, perhaps my body has not. It was only a guess but it made sense to me because, by and large, this was a sort of trauma and maybe it weakened my immune system.

What surprised the most during my bedridden state, was that Thranduil kept coming to check on me and continue his treatment, whatever that really meant. I had no idea how elvish medicine worked and I had an idea that they weren't too keen on sharing their secrets. Maybe that was also why they wanted me to help them treat the people of Dale, so that they could keep their secrets amongst themselves. I didn't necessarily mind, it gave me something to do and connected me with other humans. I really liked Lady Signe's company and even with the death of the old woman, I wanted to go back when I felt better. However, his Lordship refused to let me out of bed even though I did feel better. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't perplexed by Thranduil's sudden change of attitude towards me. For weeks, he'd treated me with nothing but suspicion and went through great lengths to ignore me. I'd been certain he only allowed me to stay here out of pity and to save his own reputation. Now that we were actually on speaking terms, he seemed to enjoy our conversations and actually, so did I. Thranduil was well-spoken, intelligent and even had a sense of humor, though he'd never admit it to anyone else.

After I told him about Charlie, he never asked me about it again and I was grateful for it. That said, I was also curious about his wife. I knew she was the reason for his cold demeanour and why he was so detached from everyone. I wondered if that's the reason why he trusted me more now, because we had both lost someone we loved. In my fever induced state, I remember him saying that it was the anniversary of his wife's death. I couldn't help but wonder how long ago she died, but knowing the lifespan of elves, it was impossible to guess.

"You are quiet today, arwenamin." Thranduil noted "What are you pondering?"

At first, I wasn't sure whether to be honest with him, but something told me that if I wasn't, he would know. I honestly don't know why the story of his wife stuck in my mind the way it had. I wasn't one to let something linger, but I couldn't let it go. Thranduil was such a mystery in general that I just wanted to understand him. Being a nurse meant it was my job to heal people, but there was no cure for a broken heart. It wasn't the first time I'd seen sadness caused by love, but it was different with Thranduil. I couldn't quite describe it, but it was a haunting sort of loneliness that seemed to root itself in the very core of his being. Aerin explained to me that elves handled heartbreak very badly and it was the one thing that could kill them. Still, Thranduil was alive and hadn't allowed his own sorrow to drain his life. That spoke volumes about his character and it made me all the more curious.

In the months after Charlie's death, my life was nothing but a blur. I barely remember anything apart from waking up and going to bed. Eventually, it got easier and I was able to get on with life but it was lonely. Sure, I have friends but not much family to speak of. Charlie was everything to me. It was easy to imagine that if you were blessed with immortality, you committed to a partner in a completely different way.

"What makes you think I have something on my mind?" I asked, although I'm not sure why I wasn't just honest with him in the first place.

"You breathe much deeper when you are thinking." Thranduil replied. "I gather there is a question you wish to ask?"

I watched as he prepared the usual herbal tea as he had for the past few days. I wondered what was in it, but I had a feeling it wasn't just the herbs that made it all work. I was still trying to comprehend magic and how it worked, but it was so beyond anything I was used to. Thranduil was right of course, and more perceptive than he let on.

"I know it's not really any of my business, but I remember what you told me the other night." I started, and felt myself getting nervous. "You told me it was the anniversary of your wife's death and I wanted to ask you about her."

"What is it you wish to know?" Thranduil said "Speak quickly, you'll be feeling the effects of the remedy soon."

I sat up more properly as Thranduil passed me his herbal remedy. A small twitch in his face told me that speaking about his wife brought him discomfort and I wondered if I ought to abandon the subject entirely. Then again, he asked me w hat I wanted to know and if I didn't ask him now then I might not get another opportunity. My grandmother once told me that curiosity was a sin, but all I wanted was to know the person whose kingdom I was a guest in.

"What happened to her?" I asked quietly "I sometimes hear others talk about her as if she died long ago, but you speak of her as if it was only yesterday. I know your grief is still near and maybe that's why you are so distant from others."

"What does it matter to you?" Thranduil snapped "Why are you so invested in my private affairs?"

I had anticipated Thranduil's reaction, but to my surprise, his sharp words stung.

"You offered me a home when I had none." I explained "I just want to understand and to know you better. You told me you could trust me, but how can I trust you if you still see me as an enemy? For the past few years, my country has been struggling and now we're in a war where it's impossible to know who is a friend or a foe. I don't want that to be the case here."

Silence.

Thranduil paced across the room with his hands behind his back in that slow, graceful way all elves did. It was as though they floated ever so slightly above the ground. His long cascading blonde hair glimmered as though it was as magical as he was. His face with its strong cheekbones were ageless and whenever his icy blue eyes looked at me, I was certain he could see the very essence of my soul.

It was impossible for anyone to miss how attractive Thranduil was.

All elves were utterly stunning, but Thranduil had a different air about him and I couldn't quite explain it.

I know what you're thinking. "Millie Thomas fancies the elvenking." but I swear I don't. I'm just….fascinated by him. Wouldn't you be if you found yourself in a strange land where magic exists and then a guest in his kingdom? Besides, even if we might never become friends, I truly did want him to at least trust me and to not see me as a threat.

"My wife's name was Mithiel." Thranduil began, "We grew up together as children in Doriath. She was older than me by a few centuries and after the destruction of Beleriand, she fled with the remaining members of our kin. My father became the first king of the woodland realm, which back then was known as Greenwood the Great, before the darkness infected it with its sickness. My father was eventually killed in the battle of Dagorlad, one of the great alliances of men and elves that this world has ever seen. After his death, I became king and by then, Mithiel and I had been lovers for nearly five-hundred years. We married and not long after, she gave birth to our son Legolas. For a long time, we were happy together but in those days, darkness began to spread throughout Middle-Earth and we often fought the forces with whom we share these woods."

"The spiders?" I asked "Or something else?"

"There are far worse things in this world than spiders, Millicent Thomas. Orcs are some of the most vile creatures born out of the darkness and back then, they were growing in numbers. Tauriel, my former captain of the guard had long since been tracking an orc pack causing trouble in our land. My wife was away on a visit to Rivendell, where she had friends and on the way back, she was caught in an ambush. Her guards were killed immediately, but I suspect they wanted her death to be painful because they knew who she was. You see, orcs poison their blades and arrows so that when they pierce through your skin, the poison has already started working. If you're human, it will kill you within seconds. In fact, I believe Queen Maggie's brother was killed by an orc arrow at the battle of Pellenor fields a few years ago. Mithiel was brought home and, by pure chance Lord Elrond was visiting at the time, but not even his healing skills could help her. She died only hours later, in my arms. Something with which you have experience, I believe? Charles died in your arms, did he not?"

I must have had quite the expression on my face, because Thranduil's glance flickered away from me, almost as if he was ashamed. I had told him about Charlie dying, but I'd never told him that he died in my arms when I found him, clinging onto the last bit of life.

"How did you know….?" I asked as my voice quivered "I never told you that part."

"During your first nightmare, I saw a glimpse of your dream." Thranduil explained. "I saw you holding Charles as you tried to revive him, moments before he died."

"Is this something that elves do? See the private parts of people's worst nightmares without permission?"

"Some of us have these gifts and sometimes we can't control them."

"Is this the first time you've seen my dreams?"

I only needed to see the look in Thranduil's eyes to know the answer. He had seen it more than once and even though he said it was an accident, perhaps that was the case the first time. Most of the time over the past few days, I'd been out cold and it was easy for him.

"How many times was it truly an accident?" I asked although the silence was already enough of an answer. "What gives you the right? You said I could trust you but yet, you took advantage while I was in my weakest state."

"You must understand," Thranduil began "I was curious and it was clear that you did not want to speak about Charlie. I allowed my curiosity to get the better of me and I apologise."

Too late.

"How can I possibly trust you, if it is so easy for you to completely disregard the feelings of others! At least I had the courtesy of asking about your wife." I snapped "Perhaps the others are right about you."

A new emotion appeared on the elvenking's face. One I hadn't seen before.

Regret.

"Millicent, please-"

"Leave." I demanded "I don't want to talk to you, let alone be your friend."

I thought Thranduil was going to protest because he opened his mouth, but then promptly closed it and silently walked out of my bedroom.

Thranduil and I avoided each other over the next couple of weeks. I was grateful to be fully recovered from the infection but my heart was heavy with sadness. Upon finding out about what Thranduil had done, I felt so betrayed and violated that I couldn't look him in the eyes. Those final moments with Charlie was one of the worst memories of my life and incredibly private. I had told Thranduil the story, thinking he would respect it and perhaps trust me to open up a bit more. Now, I regretted asking him about his wife because for one foolish second I thought that maybe he had a heart after all.

What bothered me the most was how much this affected me.

I was a stranger in Thranduil's house. He kept me here out of politeness and pity, not because he wanted a friend. I had become friends with Aerin, Gwydion, Hallath and some of the other elves during my stay and I was happy about that, but I knew I couldn't stay there forever. I liked Middle-Earth but it wasn't my home.

My home was on fire.

I didn't even know if there was a London to get back to, if the Germans had won the war. There was nothing for me back home. No family, barely any friends that would miss me and no Charlie.

I was on my own.

Not to mention there was no sign of this Gandalf the Wizard and I was beginning to think he would never show up, so no matter how I looked at things, I was stuck in Middle-Earth.

The way I saw it, I had two choices. I could wallow in my own misery over Thranduil's betrayal or I could carry on with my life here. I didn't have to interact with him and he did a good job at not acknowledging my existence, which worked fine for me. Most days, I spent time with either Gwydion or followed Hallath when he went out on a daily patrol. He told me about the land and taught me a little bit about the various animals and creatures that lived in Mirkwood. If I ever got lost for some reason, he showed me how to find my way back and what landmarks to look out for. Sometimes, he took me to Dale so that I could spend some time with Lady Signe, who had become a good friend. When his patrol was done, he would pick me up and then we returned to Mirkwood.

On more than one occasion, Signe wondered if it wasn't better for me to stay with them in Dale and I really did consider it. Truthfully, I wasn't sure why I didn't take her offer. It made the most sense. Yet, I found myself strangely drawn to Mirkwood and couldn't help but feel I somehow belonged there.

Halfway through my third month in Mirkwood, at the beginning of December I sat at my desk, writing down notes in my journal. It had become a routine pastime of mine and I followed Mr Grayham's advice to write down my story, in case it mattered to anyone. Earlier that day, I'd heard Hallath discussing receiving visitors to Mirkwood and I was intrigued because Thranduil made it well known that he didn't like visitors much. I wasn't about to ask him, though. It was sometime in the early evening when I heard footsteps heading towards my bedroom and at first I thought it was Aerin bringing me my evening meal, but it was a little early. The sound of three careful knocks reached my ears and I didn't recognise them. My curiosity grabbed me by the shoulders and I when I turned around I was met by an unexpected sight.

A young woman carefully opened the door and walked in. The first thing that surprised me was that she was human and around my age, give or take a few years. Her wavy raven hair rested comfortably on her shoulders and I also noticed a few beaded braids in her hair. She

had kind, chestnut coloured eyes and wore a long green dress that was elegant but not too dramatic.

"Millicent, right?" she asked politely but it was clear she already knew the answer. "My name is Maggie, I'm a….friend of Thranduil."

I immediately realised this must be the Queen Maggie of Erebor, whom I'd heard so much about. The human woman who had married a dwarven king, which seemed strange to me but then again, many things in Middle-Earth were.

"Why did you hesitate when you said friend?" I asked, not meaning to sound accusatory but it stood out to me as strange.

"Thranduil and I have a….shall we say complicated relationship." Maggie explained "He is a good friend of my partner and his son is also a close friend of mine. However, Thranduil and I have always struggled to see eye to eye on...well everything.. He's very..."

"Difficult?"

"Ah, so you've picked up on that. I'll have to let Elrond know that it's not just me."

A slight chuckle escaped my lips and I found myself relaxing. Even though we had only been talking for a few moments, I already liked Maggie. I knew she was the queen of Erebor but she didn't look like any queen I'd seen and wasn't what I'd imagined. Most other humans I had met in Middle-Earth were almost medieval in the way they acted and spoke, but not Maggie.

"Something's different about you, you're not like the others." I said "You speak differently, almost like I do but not quite. You're not from here, are you?"

"Thranduil did say you were very sharp." Maggie said "No, I'm not from here. There's no easy way of phrasing this, but my friends and I are from your world. Although I understand there are some significant changes. What year is it, where you're from?"

Maggie's statement took me by complete surprise. I couldn't believe what I'd just heard. She was from my world? From Earth? How was that even possible? Then, another thing struck me and I felt my cheeks burning hot with anger. Thranduil must have known all this time that Maggie was from my world, but still he chose to keep it from me and keep me here when I could have spoken to someone else all along?

"1940, what else would it be?" I said, almost fearing her answer.

The look in Maggie's eyes changed and I suddenly felt worried.

"1940, huh?" she said calmly as she leaned against the wall next to my desk. That would explain why you're so afraid of the Germans."

"You're not?" I asked "Where are you from?"

"Not so much where, as when. I was born in Cardiff in 1993. The first time my brother and I found ourselves in Middle-Earth was almost seven years ago, by our time."

"What do you mean?"

A sigh escaped Maggie's lips as she was trying to figure out how to explain it to me. I'd rather she but it bluntly though.

"Time flows differently between our worlds, Millicent." she explained "My brother and I were sent home after our first quest in Middle-Earth, albeit not by our choice. We spent a year at home between 2018-2019 and when we suddenly came back to Middle-Earth, 60 years had passed. That's now 67 years ago."

I could feel my jaw hit the ground.

"That's not possible." I whispered "Such things aren't possible."

"After everything you've witnessed so far, is that what you truly believe?" Maggie asked

"...no."

"Why are you here, Maggie?"

"Thranduil wrote me a letter a little while ago, which surprised me more than anything, let me tell you." Maggie began "He told me about you and asked if I would come to visit because I gather things have been difficult."

I snorted and I wondered exactly what Thranduil had told Maggie in his letter. I wasn't angry with her at all, I believed she genuinely wanted to reach out and I was beyond happy to have someone who knew what it was like.

"What did he do?" Maggie asked gently "In all the years that I've known Thranduil, he has never once reached out to me. Least of all because he wants help. He is a proud and damned stubborn elf who would sooner rather die than admit his own mistakes. Honestly, I've never seen him care about anything other than himself and his son, so it makes me wonder what he did to seek help."

"It's a bit of a long story." I replied

"I have time, why don't you start at the beginning?"

I nodded and then found myself retelling my story to Maggie from my last day at work to my falling out with Thranduil. She listened intently without interrupting and I saw both curiosity and empathy in her eyes. I instantly liked Maggie and I was glad to share my story with somebody who understood and who had seemingly been through the same thing.

Perhaps there was some light after all.

To be continued…

Another chapter! I think this is the longest one I've written! This is a little bit of a crossover with my other fics set in the same AU. You don't have to have read them to understand what's going on but if you do it starts with "Castaways" and the continues with "Mélamar" and "All Bonds of Fellowship" the latter one you can find on AO3 under my username NerdWItch :)

What did you think about this chapter? Did Thranduil's wife's story make sense? I tried to look up some information about his backstory, but his wife is never named in Tolkien's works so I made that one up. Are Thranduil and Millie going to make up and be friends? I'd love to hear your thoughts so please leave a review!