Thanks to everyone who read and to MelsieR for reviewing.

"Jamie, come on, head in the game," Hank snapped. "Where's the tape?"

"Right. I...sorry." Jamie pushed himself to his feet and hurried back to the ambulance. On another day he might have joked that a game was about the last thing that he'd involve himself in, but right now he was so far from his best that he'd probably be of more use if he just sat in the ambulance. Not that he had any idea what he was supposed to do about it.

Well, he could try to get some sleep, which was what he'd been attempting before this call had come in, but so far that hadn't been going any better than it had last night and he didn't see that changing until he was so exhausted that he fell over. Experience said that that would be tonight at best.

Or at least he really hoped that it happened tonight. If he was still this out of it tomorrow when he was working with Alex he didn't even want to think about how much trouble he'd be in. Not that he'd ever actually worked with Alex before, but Alex was the one who checked him off as he finished various levels of training, and he wasn't patient or forgiving even when the 'victim' Jamie screwed up with was just a dummy. Jamie screwing up in front of him when an actual human was involved didn't bear thinking on. At least Hank mostly just rolled his eyes and sniped at him a few times if he did something stupid. Well, normally, anyway. Today had been unusually bad and it was probably just as well that he wouldn't be seeing any of the rest of the squad for a few days after this.

The visit with Grandma could have gone better yesterday, but it could have gone worse, too. It had before, especially the couple times he'd visited in the evening. At least yesterday she'd recognized that he was her grandson, even if it had taken a couple tries to get to 'Jamie' and she'd seemed to think that he was around twelve or so. She'd been happy enough to chat with him, though, and he'd stayed to have lunch with her and then headed back when one of the nurses had come to take her to some art class.

Except he'd ended up back in town so early that he'd decided to swing by Kenny's to see if anything interesting was happening there, and what he'd found...

He'd suspected that Kenny was using before, with the mood swings and the quick glimpse of needles everything else, but somehow knowing it made things a hundred times worse. And he didn't know what he was supposed to do about it, either. Tell Kenny that drugs were bad? It wasn't exactly news, especially since they'd both watched Kenny's mom shoot up with every drug under the sun over the years. Nor was Kenny likely to care about Jamie's opinion even if Jamie got in his face about it. Jamie had practically had hysterics the first time Kenny had gotten drunk in front of him, and even knowing everything Kenny had still found that funny.

Tell someone else? Who? Their friends, sure, at least a couple of them if only to give them a heads-up, but it wasn't like they'd be able to do any more than he could.

Some adult? Yeah, right. Kenny's mom might put on a good show when other people were around, but beyond that she didn't give a damn, and the teachers at school would probably just throw a party celebrating the fact that now they had a reason to kick him out. Nor would Kenny care about any of their opinions any more than Jamie's anyway. And Jamie wasn't about to even breathe the word 'drugs' around Alex. Somehow staying with him was still going all right, and Jamie had no desire to end up homeless and hungry and cold again any sooner than he had to.

Jamie had tried swinging by Caitie's right after leaving Kenny's, mostly because he'd wanted someone to talk to, but her house had been quiet. Apparently they'd already taken off for their visit. He'd thought about going to see one of the others, but with Christmas right around the corner they were probably too busy to talk to him even if they were still in town, so he'd ended up just wandering around the park for a little bit before going back to Alex's with no new ideas about what to do.

Alex was too smart for anyone's good and had figured that something was wrong immediately, not that Jamie had done a very good job of hiding it, but fortunately he hadn't pushed beyond that initial, awkward offer. His conference thing meant that most of his focus had been on his laptop for the afternoon even to the point of letting Jamie pick what was on television, but he hadn't showed any inclination to leave the living room, and somehow the light tapping and occasional grumbles directed at the screen had been weirdly okay.

Those hours stretched out on Alex's couch hadn't given Jamie any ideas, though, nor had tossing and turning all night in bed. Avoiding Kenny might make him feel a little better, at least temporarily, but it wasn't like he was going to forget. Nor was ignoring it likely to change the situation unless Kenny decided to knock off being stupid on his own. Kenny might be his oldest friend, but Jamie already knew that he wasn't one for that kind of self-reflection.

"Jamie!" Val yelled..

Dammit. "Coming!" He grabbed the tape and hurried back to Hank and Val who were currently holding bandages on the woman's arm, trying to ignore their twin glares. The woman's injuries were more painful than severe, but Hank wasn't the only teammate that was irritated with him, and he was not looking forward to the call critiques on everything that had happened today. He'd managed to avoid completely screwing anything up, but that was about the best that he could say.

Part of him almost wished that Tyler had been around to trade shifts with, but that was stupid considering that it would have meant that Tyler would have missed the holiday with his father that he'd been looking forward to for forever. Or at least for the past month. Jamie wouldn't put that on him ever. He'd just...deal. Somehow.

Val helped their victim up from her seat and out of the house towards the ambulance—the burns weren't deep, but she was old enough that transport to the hospital was very much recommended—as Hank spoke to her husband about where to tell their children and grandchildren to meet them. Jamie kept his mouth shut and did the cleanup. At least they only had a six hour shift today, and it was more than half over.

When they left the hospital Hank and Val had taken the seats at the front of the ambulance, and Jamie closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat in the back. He'd drink more coffee when they got back to the station and worry about trying to sleep later. Or figure out a solution tonight. Or do...something. Why did life have to suck all the time?

"Jamie?"

A hand on his shoulder woke Jamie with a start, and he jerked away, looking around quickly.

"Easy, just me," Alex said, stepping back and holding up his hands. "Your shift ended about an hour ago, but I didn't want to wake you up while I was still finishing paperwork. Are you ready to go home?"

"Oh." He swiped at his eyes. He vaguely remembered picking up a magazine and a cup of coffee and taking a seat at the table, but after that everything was pretty much blank. "Yeah. Hank and Val?"

"Already gone, along with Brooke. I got the impression that they were in a hurry, although Brooke says that you owe her some reports."

Jamie groaned. He knew that he was a couple days behind, he was pretty much always a couple days behind, but he hated reports. And for today's he'd probably have to sneak a look at Val's or Hank's just to know what the call-outs had been anyway.

Alex smiled. "There should be plenty of time to work on them tomorrow."

"Great." Jamie rubbed his eyes again and then pushed himself to his feet, snagging the magazine from the floor and the cup of coffee gone cold from the table in front of him. Not that the coffee had done him any good, clearly, but leaving dirty cups lying around the station was a pretty big no-no. "I've got to grab my backpack. Meet you at the car?"

Alex nodded and started to turn, only to stop with a quick hiss.

"Alex?"

He waved it off. "I'm fine, just a little stiff. It happens sometimes when I spend too long sitting in one place. I wasn't thinking or I'd have gotten up and gone for a walk yesterday afternoon." He nodded to the kitchen. "Go on, I'll be outside."

It only took Jamie a minute to drop things off, and Alex was just getting the car warmed up when Jamie joined him.

"Do you think you're up to helping me with dinner tonight?" Alex asked as Jamie buckled himself in. "It's a roast so it's going to take some time to cook, but I'd prefer to have something better than lunch meat to take to the station tomorrow. And I probably shoudn't be lifting pots in and out of ovens right now." He didn't look very happy admitting that, but if he was already stiff it kind of made sense. Alex was usually pretty clear about when he could and couldn't do things.

"Yeah, sure." Jamie mostly just picked at whatever was in the fridge when Alex wasn't cooking, there were always sandwich supplies or leftovers or cereal or whatever, but he'd watched a little when Alex did cook. He wasn't going to touch the stove himself since that probably would result in catching the house on fire, but it kind of looked like fun. Plus, food. He still wasn't exactly hungry, but he felt a little better after his nap. And if he didn't start eating normally again, Alex would definitely know that something was up.

He dropped his backpack in his room when they got home and then headed for the kitchen to join Alex.

"Can you get me the Dutch oven?" Alex asked, looking up from a recipe book.

"Uh..."

"In that cabinet down there," he said with a nod to the one by the dishwasher. "It looks kind of like a deep pot with a glass lid."

It took Jamie a minute to find it, tucked away at the back as it was, and he was surprised by the weight when he pulled it forward. No wonder Alex didn't think he should be lifting it if his back was already sore. "What's this even made of?" Jamie said as he pulled it out.

"Cast iron. I shouldn't keep it down there given how hard it is for me to get it out, but I don't use it all that often, and it's heavy enough that I'm not sure it's safe to keep it up higher." He patted the counter, and Jamie put it where he indicated and took the cutting board Alex handed him.