Thanks to everyone who read and to Ghostwriter, Callisto's Moon, and MelsieR for reviewing.

Jamie blinked slowly, confused why his eyes felt like they were somehow bruised from the inside. And then he registered a hand resting on his shoulder and flinched away instinctively.

"Easy, kiddo."

He blinked again. Alex. Duh, especially since he'd apparently fallen asleep in the living room. Alex was sitting at one end of the couch, though, instead of in his usual chair, and Jamie frowned and struggled to sit up as he realized that his head had been resting on a pillow against Alex's leg.

Alex didn't try to stop him, staying still until Jamie was upright and a few feet away again. "Hey. Are you back with me?"

For a moment Jamie was confused as to why he wouldn't be—he was confused about several things right now, including why Alex sounded so strange—and then everything came rushing back, and he choked.

"Easy," Alex repeated, reaching out slowly to rub Jamie's back. "Breathe, kiddo."

"Kenny," Jamie managed to croak.

"I know." Alex moved a little, sliding close enough to put an arm around Jamie's shoulders.

Normally Jamie didn't like it when adults touched him, but right now he found himself huddling closer to Alex. Or at least trying to since he was a little bit taller and didn't exactly fit tucked under Alex's arm very well. Kenny was—

Alex tightened his arm as Jamie's whole body shivered. "I know."

The television was on, but Jamie couldn't focus on anything on the screen, and he wasn't sure how long they sat there before Alex spoke again.

"It's getting late. Do you think you could manage a little soup if I heated some up for us? I'm have a feeling that neither of us are up for that pizza."

Jamie shook his head immediately. He wasn't hungry. And he didn't want Alex to go anywhere.

"Okay."

Silence returned, and Jamie gave up on the screen entirely and stared down at his hands and tried to figure out what was supposed to happen now. None of this...none of this made any sense. He and Kenny were supposed to have spent the afternoon hanging out doing nothing, and now he and Alex were supposed to be eating pizza and watching a movie, and everything was supposed to be fine.

Not that anyone had every really said that it wasn't fine, not even Alex, but Jamie had been the one doing CPR. And he'd been there when Ryan and his team had been trying to get a response out of Kenny in the ambulance. And he wasn't stupid.

"You and Kenny had known each other for a long time, it sounded like," Alex said quietly.

It was the past tense, and Jamie found himself biting his lip against the tears that suddenly threatened again. "It's for—for sure, then?"

Alex sighed. "I asked one of the nurses I know to let me know when they'd located Kenny's mother. I got a text an hour or two ago. I'm sorry."

Jamie shook his head, biting his lip, and then gave up and buried his face in Alex's shoulder as Alex turned him gently and pulled him into a real hug.

"Shhh. I know. I'm sorry."

Jamie was too old to be clinging like a stupid little kid, and he knew it, but somehow it still took him a few minutes to let go. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do," he said when he'd finally managed to pull back again.

Alex let him go and went back to rubbing his back as Jamie scrubbed his hands against his eyes. "That's okay. You don't have to do anything right now."

"But should I call Caitie, or Faustus, or..." He shook his head and swallowed hard against the tears. "I don't think Kenny's mom even knows their numbers."

"Somebody will need to tell them, but it doesn't have to be you, and it doesn't have to be right now," Alex said firmly. "Nothing's going to happen tonight."

"But—"

"Do you want to talk to Caitie or one of your other friends?" Alex interrupted.

Jamie hesitated for a moment and then shook his head. He kind of doubted he'd be able to say anything even if he got one of them on the phone.

"Okay, then. We'll see how you feel tomorrow—or if you'd rather, I can make a couple calls—but it might be a good idea to see what Kenny's family's plans are first anyway." It was quiet again for a few minutes, and then Alex sighed. "I'm sorry, kiddo, but I'm going to have to get up for a few minutes. Do you think you could go put some water on for tea? I know you prefer chocolate, but that might not be a good idea if your stomach is upset."

Jamie would kind of rather have slid back over by Alex even if he was too old, but he knew perfectly well that Alex couldn't sit still for too long before his back started stiffening up, and he swiped at his eyes and nodded. "Okay."

"Thank you."

Judging by his slow speed and the wince that he tried to hide as he stood Alex was already stiff, and Jamie rubbed his eyes again and turned for the kitchen as Alex headed for his room. He was pretty sure that Alex was right and chocolate would put him him danger of throwing up right now, but he could at least make whatever tea Alex wanted.

Alex insisted that Jamie take a mug of mint tea too, and then the two of them went back to the couch. And Alex didn't seem to mind that Jamie stayed close since he went back to rubbing his back lightly.

"How long were you and Kenny neighbors?" he asked after a few minutes.

"Seven or eight years, I think." Jamie shrugged. "Something close to that, anyway. I know we lived somewhere else when I was real little, but I don't remember much about that except that we had to move when Mom left. And then we stayed there until I was in foster care."

"And you were climbing in and out of each others' windows, huh?" Alex ruffled his hair lightly. "I suppose that's when you developed your fascination with roofs."

"Maybe," Jamie admitted after a minute. "But we didn't really go up there too often. The ladder on that corner isn't attached very well at the top, and sometimes other people were up there that we didn't like. He mostly came over when his Mom and her boyfriends didn't want him around, and I hid at his place when Dad wanted to punish me, so it was only when neither of us could go home that we climbed all the way up."

Alex's hand stopped for a moment and then he sighed and tugged on Jamie's shoulder lightly, and Jamie scooted a little closer and let Alex wrap an arm around his shoulders again and tried not to cry. It wasn't fair. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Kenny's mom turned to walk away with the priest guy, and the half-dozen or so other adults who'd been standing with her started to leave too, and Jamie tore his eyes from the grave to look down at Caitie. "I guess it's done." It didn't seem like it should be, just a box and a few words, but... He closed his eyes hard and pushed his sunglasses back up his nose. He was very glad that Alex had suggested them.

Caitie's fierce grip on his arm didn't lessen, but after a minute she sniffled and nodded.

"Yeah," Brianne agreed at the same time from Caitie's other side.

"So do we just leave?" Micah, standing on Jamie's left, finally asked. "I mean, I guess they all did." He gestured vaguely in the direction the adults had gone.

Jamie shrugged. "I think so." He'd been little when Grandmere had died, but he was pretty sure that once the coffin was in the ground, that was it.

"Unless there's a reception or something," Donny, at the opposite end of their line, said. "And I don't think there's one of those." He shifted a little. "I guess...I guess we'll see you guys later."

Jamie nodded and muttered a goodbye as Donny and Erica turned to walk away. In another year they might already have their plans set for the first weekend after school was out—a weekend that started tomorrow since it had taken almost week for all of this to get organized—but that just...all of them were too shook up to think about anything like that right now. Or at least he was, and Caitie seemed to be too, and there was no reason to think any of the others were any different. Jamie had no doubt that they'd all meet up at the park or behind the old theater or something eventually, but it might take a little time.

The rest of them stood in silence for a few minutes longer, and then Jamie twisted to look at Alex who was waiting a bit behind the group.

Alex stepped forward when Jamie met his eyes, reaching out to touch Jamie's back lightly. "Are you all right, kiddo?"

Jamie shook his head.

"Would you like to stay a little longer?"

Jamie hesitated and then shook his head again. "I don't think so. Caitie? Brianne?"

They both shook their heads as well.

"Okay," Alex said. "Does everyone else have a ride?"

Alex and Jamie—well, Alex, technically, since he'd said that he didn't want Jamie riding his bike this morning—had picked up Caitie and Brianne on their way over, and Jamie looked over at the others. "Faustus, you've got a way home, right?" Micah's bike was parked just ahead of Alex's car, and Tom's dad had been back with Alex so obviously he had a ride, too, but as far as Jamie knew Faustus was still on his own two feet.

"Hm?" Faustus seemed confused for a moment, although it was a little hard to tell given that he was wearing sunglasses as well, but then he shook his head. "Oh. Yeah, I'm good. I caught a ride with Tom."

Jamie turned to look back at Alex. "Yeah," he echoed.

"Okay, then."

Alex stepped back, and Jamie muttered a quiet goodbye to the other boys before turning to follow. For a minute he thought that Caitie—Caitie and his arm with her—was going to stay behind, but then she turned as well, and Brianne followed.

"Do you girls want me to take you straight home, or would you like to come over and visit for a while?" Alex asked, shifting his gaze between them and Jamie as they stepped out of the graveyard and onto the street. "I have a shift in the emergency room that starts at six tonight so I could drop you off on my way in if you'd like to come over."

He'd really been supposed to have the night shift on Monday, but with everything going on he'd traded around so he could stay home. It would have been better if he'd let Jamie skip therapy too, but Alex hadn't been willing to go that far even if Jamie hadn't wanted to talk and they'd all ended up playing some board game Dr. Laura had had. And despite his best attempts he hadn't been able to get rid of the shift entirely hence working tonight, but it wasn't like Jamie was a little kid.

"I guess if it's okay," Caitie said after a moment, looking at Brianne and then at Jamie. "I mean, if it's okay with you. I don't think anyone's home at my place right now, everybody is at work or at summer school or at the babysitter's or whatever."

"My parents are at work too," Brianne said.

"Okay," Jamie agreed. He'd never had a friend over before, even though the other day hadn't been the first time that Alex had said it was allowed, but he wouldn't mind their company right now. They hadn't known Kenny as long as he had, maybe, they'd only really all met up when they'd ended up at the same middle school, but they'd still been his friends. And while Alex had been pretty great this past week, sitting on the couch with Jamie every night even though it was nowhere near as comfortable as his chair, and even staying up when Jamie had nightmares, Jamie knew full well that he hadn't liked Kenny very much. And Jamie definitely couldn't talk about the times they'd wandered off at night to throw rocks at boarded-up windows or cut school to go to the arcade or whatever with Alex.