Chapter 35

It's breezy outside, and Sakura's thankful for her coat and umbrella. The meteorologist had predicted rain, and the skies looked like they could weep at any moment. Everything smelled like wet cement and freshly cut grass.

Somber weather brought out somber thoughts. Each step beside Sasuke felt like she'd been captured in a very elaborate genjutsu that she certainly didn't want to break herself from.

For some reason, although she'd expected to lose her virginity to Sasuke, she'd never dream to walk by his side through the middle of town. Becoming a tangled mess of hormones was understandable—Sakura knew how romance could become strictly chemical given the right situations.

Those situations happened repeatedly.

Sakura feels lava rise across the bridge of her nose and pulls at the sleeves of her jacket, covering her hands as if they were too shy to be exposed. If only she could crawl into her covering and hide from everyone.

They knew, didn't they? Everyone knew…

"Um," She begins, nibbling on her bottom lip, because she can't take the silence any longer. "I didn't mean to leave you alone with the baby, last night. I…hope you weren't uncomfortable."

"I wasn't." He replies dismissively.

And just like that, he's the old Sasuke again.

She grows quiet, fidgeting with the loose threads on the collar of her shirt. There's an especially long one jutting out, and she follows the string to the curve of her neck. It's then that Sakura feels it—the soreness of a bruise over the steady pulse of her vein.

It was the spot that Sasuke went to over and over; tasting her throbbing heartbeat as she writhed beneath his body. She had discovered already that he refused to be healed—he wanted to keep her marks just as much as she wanted to keep his.

What happened was more than chemical... It was more than animalistic instinct…

This is all Sakura needs to flip her mood back around. With a happy gallop, she steps by his side. She notices how his speed slows and his obsidian orbs dip towards her, if only briefly, but it's enough to flutter her core.

He wasn't bold with affections, and he would never be. But Sakura was content with the little things…like when he slowed his pace to make up for hers.

As they continue farther and farther into Konoha, Sakura can't help but notice that Sasuke's eyes dart around as he weaves between people that gave him a wide birth. The smells of street food and perfumed shops meet her nostrils hungrily, and Sakura can't decide if she wants to buy a new outfit or stuff her face with some syrupy dango.

Or, both; both is good.

The deeper they went into the village, the denser the traffic became. Woman and children meandered from shop to shop, the steady carving of metal on whetstone swayed around the air, and bits and pieces of unimportant chatter meet her ears powerfully.

Sasuke is still monitoring their surroundings. He's reactive like he was as a young man, taking in the environment apprehensively. It was something he'd done for as far back as she could remember. In any new building he'd immediately search for exits. In any new town, he'd memorize the alleyways between streets.

But this is Konoha. This is home.

With the slightest of movements, Sakura's pale hand extends from her sleeve and reaches for his pinky. He turns his head, peeking from over the high color of his coat.

"Do you sense someone, Sasuke?" Or do you really feel like an outsider?

He exhales and his puffy outbreath floats around his face. "…No one of interest."

His finger slips from her grasp and he continues onward through the hoard. Sakura would have to take his declaration at face value. He would tell her how he felt when he was ready. If he'd ever be ready.

But she could wait. She would always wait for him.

It's easier for Sasuke to walk than it was for her, mostly because is height and arrogance helped tremendously. With Sakura's chin propped up high, trying to look over the shoulders of ninja and civilian alike, and her feet working overtime to stay by Sasuke, she didn't notice the huge wet patch of slushy mud until it was too late.

The gunk captured her ankle completely. With an unsuccessful tug, she tried to wrench the appendage out. She could feel her heel start to slide and her sock fall down in the process. Annoyance floods her veins.

"Are you kidding me?" She asks aloud to no one in particular.

With her focus otherwise preoccupied, she doesn't even notice the approaching danger until it's too late. He peels his lips back into a sneer. "What a lame ninja."

Sakura looks up to see pastel blue skin and a mouthful of razor-sharp fangs. Suigetsu's eyes are closed tightly because he's smiling so big—and it's unsettling and…gentle at the same time.

Both hands are propped on slender hips, and his feet stand apart as if he were making some sort of battle pose. Perhaps it's a precursor of what's to come.

Sakura is curt, but cordial. "It would seem like it."

She had a mixed opinion on the man before her. While handsome, his fake attitude reminded Sakura of Sai, except Sai couldn't help it. And as much as this guy tried to hide his bloodlust, it mingled in with the air poisonously. Forced grins and murderous intent didn't give off the best vibes—especially when Sakura was trapped like a fly on sticky paper.

He was flirty in an odd, relaxing way, though. It didn't really send chills up her spine so much as it made her stutter—even if she wasn't attracted to him in the least. Danger and good-looks seemed to be her downfall.

The man steps her way and drops down low to wrap cold hands around her covered calf. He looks up at her with his strange, oxymoronic charm "We'll pull together, okay?"

The two yank simultaneously and she is freed! But the hideous purple and yellow of her novelty sock glares back at her, and her shoe is left to fester in the icky muck. Cold hair hits the freshly exposed limb hungrily. Trying to keep her balance, Sakura places her hand on Suigetsu's shoulders.

"Man, that's bad luck ya know? How did you get into this mess?"

Sakura feels Sasuke before he even speaks, and she's not quite sure how. He rarely gave off much of a signature these days. Sasuke had an ominous, scary amount of power that would tempt demons and hunter-nin alike if let free. It was common practice for higher-ups to conceal most of their chakra.

It wasn't the heat he gave off, or any type of palpable authority either. It was simply Sasuke, and his proximity sent tingles throughout her flesh and made her hair stand at attention. If Suigetsu made her stutter, Sasuke made her shake.

"What is bad luck?" Sasuke asks.

Though her back is facing him, she could tell that he was undoubtedly looking from her polka-dotted sock, to her abandoned shoe. Perhaps even to the grip she had on his former teammate.

Suigetsu stands lazily, brushing Sakura's palm from his shoulder as he flashes his old boss a toothy smile. "Yo. What a surprise to see you here. Running some errands?"

As if Suigetsu was simply a lamp post—an object not worth Sasuke's time—the sable-haired man regards Sakura with a sigh and reattaches foot to boot by tipping her towards the puddle. Squatting down, his fingers pinch the tongue of her shoe and he jerks it free from the slosh in one swift heave.

Yeah, like it was sooo easy…

She doesn't have much time to huff, because there's something gloomy in the air. Sakura can feel some sort of…animosity between the two that stand beside her.

They were teammates previously, and at one point Sasuke had trusted this man with his life. Team Hebi/Taka had seen Sasuke at his worst, and he had been a force to be reckoned. But, throughout all that time, Sasuke still regarded them as companions.

What reason was there for this…threatening static?

Sasuke doesn't even bother responding to Suigetsu's question, and instead turns his back and continues on his way. His ex-teammate was used to such responses. Rolling the tension off of his arms with a lethargic stretch, Suigetsu speaks again.

"I bet you two are ready for the grand finale, eh? We should train together sometime."

Sakura bounds passed, determined not to lose track of Sasuke again. As she floats by and her hair bounces in succession, the collar of her shirt whips harshly against the wind and exposes the flesh she'd covered minutes before.

Suigetsu sees it, in that moment—the maroon stain on her neck. It clashes heavily with the alabaster of the girls' skin, making it all the more noticeable. It seemed that the strange ramblings and video Karin had showed him did hold some truth, after all.

"Oh…I guess you two only train one-on-one now?"

The mood shift is dizzying to Sakura. It goes from gloomy to all-out rage. Sasuke spins around, letting his cloak billow at his sides like the wings of a bat, sending his most heated glare as he successfully steadies his voice.

"What do you want?"

Out of everyone on his old team—even Karin—Suigetsu was the most observant. He knew what this revelation would cost them. The fish-man was devious and would use anything to pry his way under Sasuke's skin.

Flashback

"Man, that Orochimaru's an even sicker psycho than I would have thought."

They'd been traveling towards the newest lead on Itachi, passing through thick bouts of fog from The Land of Waves. It was always wet and humid there, and Sasuke hated the way his scalp would itch and bouts of rain would soak him straight to the bone.

"Quiet," Sasuke had warned.

Suigetsu had normally taken the hint. He was pretty subservient in most cases. But he had this…way about him. He was always watching, waiting for a slipup that would give him some sort of authority.

"No way. Any leverage I get on you, I'm holding it over for the rest of my life."

Sasuke considered this to be a pretty confident admission. He stops and looks at the man, trying to decide whether killing him would be worth the waste of chakra. It wasn't the first time he'd thought of ending one of his teammates. In fact, it was almost a sick rite of passage.

Karin steps out from the haze by Jugo's side, looking furious and wounded at the same time. "Just shut your fucking mouth already, Suigetsu! You're such an asshole!"

"You're the one that told him." Jugo says softly.

Sometime during the night, after Sasuke had left to wonder until daybreak, Karin had found the time to tell Suigetsu of the secret documents she'd come across while working alongside Kabuto. Why she'd felt comfortable enough to divulge the information to Suigetsu, however, was still a mystery.

And why she thought it was any concern of hers was just as perplexing.

"I don't see what the big deal is. So, Sasuke killed his old lover." Jugo speaks again, trying to settle the hostility. He'd only heard bits and pieces of the argument, but had figured out the outcome. "Why is this pertinent information?"

"Because," Suigetsu drawls out. "Sasuke is so hell-bent on making sure I don't kill anyone. He can't even follow his own rules!"

"It's not even like that! I already told you. She wasn't his lover—she was—"

"Rules were made to be broken." Sasuke warned.

Sasuke remembers his threat to Suigetsu, as his lightning hands wrapped around his icy throat, ready to kill again. He'd learned to yearn for it and that's what scared him most of all. He was becoming the old Gaara. He was becoming bad.

And Suigetsu could bring it out of him.

Flashback

Civilians try to watch the exchange secretively, but Sakura is a ninja, and she notices their intense gazes. The woman adjusts her shirt and zips the jacket all the way to the top, sighing when the cold metal teeth brush against the bottom of her chin. Dipping her nose into the fabric, she tries her best to hide her blush, hoping it goes unnoticed.

"I just haven't seen you in a while. I can't throw a few pleasantries out to an old friend?"

"We're not friends."

Sakura takes a deliberate step away from Sasuke as the silent battle ensues. She didn't think actual fists would fly—Suigetsu was too smart to attack and Sasuke was too headstrong to let his words affect him.

Or, was he? He's not the same person he used to be. She feels it's a good time to get some distance, just in case.

For the time being, they'd both hoped to keep their affair hush-hush. It was something of an unspoken understanding between them. Sasuke didn't want to bother with her boyfriend until long after he'd left the village. Sakura still deserved…someone…to keep her company, and as strange as her reasoning may be, she'd chosen Hojo.

A breakup, on top of his departure? That was just depressing.

Sakura simply didn't know how her mother would handle the news. It wasn't as if Sasuke had many good marks in his favor from her point of view—hero of the village or not. Sakura's mother had held her hand and force-fed her meals in the days after Sasuke's…defection. That woman knew more about Sakura's feelings and love than Sakura did at the time.

Thinking quickly, Sakura bites out a random question. "How did the exams go for you?"

"Jugo and I flunked out."

Sakura gulps at the quick, dismissive response and Suigetsu can see the turmoil within her. His senses pick up on every poorly concealed gesture—the way her lip dances between her bottom and top teeth, the way her fingers pull and tug on the sleeve of her jacket, the way her eyes meet his gaze only seconds at a time.

Flicking between the calm, collected Sasuke—who is coiled and ready to pounce—and his mess of a lady friend, the man smiles cunningly.

Sasuke could kill him, but he wouldn't do it here. In fact, killing him would be the exact opposite of what his journey of redemption was about. Sasuke certainly wouldn't want to backpedal, lest his girlfriend see him for what he really was.

"O-oh…you didn't?" Sakura continues, stepping closer to Suigetsu. "It was hard! I hate that you guys didn't make it to the final round…but I doubt I would have passed either, if Sasuke wasn't there. The system…uh…freaked out on us. You should have seen it—"

"Oh, I saw it, pinky." Suigetsu interrupts with a smirk. "Everyone in the village saw it. I told Jugo, I said, "I bet those two are a thing." and what do you know? You're walking around with all sorts of territorial bites from the most unemotional guy in the Land of Fire. At least I won 50 ryo."

Sakura feels her face heat up and this only seems to egg Suigetsu on more. He can see the stiffness of Sasuke's shoulders, the way his eyebrows draw together and the dark irises of mismatched orbs peek from behind narrowed slits.

It's a threat, a warning.

Still, he continues. After all, when would Suigetsu ever have such a hold over the invincible Sasuke Uchiha again? For the second time in his life, Suigetsu is grateful to Karin and her big mouth. She really needed more friends to talk about work with.

…Friends that weren't into blackmail.

"I kind of always figured he had some dime piece waiting for him back home. He was always sighing and batting his eyelashes."

"Shut up," Sasuke warns.

Suigetsu continues. "Always so…pent up and annoyed. He couldn't have gone is whole life acting that way. He must have cared for someone."

Sasuke thinks of all of the things he would have done to Suigetsu a year ago. He thinks of the person he used to be, the many times he'd wished to take a life and the very few lives he'd taken.

Then, he thinks of his final battle with his best friend.

He thinks of Naruto, lying beside him with their dominant arm blown to bits. His face was swollen from relentless poundings, just like his own was. But he was forgiving. He forgave Sasuke for all of his misdeeds and trusted him all over again with happiness etched over his features.

He thinks of Sakura's healing chakra as she stopped their blood from soaking into the shattered rock beneath their almost-dead bodies. He thinks of the way her eyes spilled tears as she fixed him up once again, proving that she'd always love him even when he fucked up.

Sasuke didn't want to betray Naruto's trust. Sasuke didn't want to fuck up anymore.

He was no longer the child that jumped into battle blindly with fists clenched and sword shining. Things like "revenge" and "betrayal" held no bounds over him any longer. Sasuke was a man. Suigetsu thought he had some sort of grip over him—a teasing chess piece that he could slide around a game board and set Sasuke's soul ablaze.

Wrong.

Instead, he wraps his hand around Sakura's wrist and pulls her nearer to him. He can see the soapiness in her eyes now—the confusion that threated the rims. She doesn't know that he's given himself to her yet.

She doesn't know that Sasuke would never do anything to hurt her anymore.

She doesn't know how much he loved her.

"Let's go," He tells her, and runs his thumb along the inner swell of her wrist. She doesn't need much pushing, because she'd follow him anywhere if he'd let her.

But, this was not any old chess piece Suigetsu cradled within his grasp.

The fish-man opens his mouth and sends fire to the pit of Sasuke's not-so-black soul. Coyly, the blackmail is revealed. "Oh, I wouldn't say that. How…does—would— it make you feel if you found out that he actually kind of did care?"

Sakura is taken aback by Suigetsu's strange, impossible question, and the randomness of the outburst.

This ex-teammate understood Sasuke, and saw him in a different state that Sakura had only come in contact with fleetingly. He was deeply wound into the Curse of Hatred at that time. Even as a boy, Sasuke had fallen into the spell and only rarely did the Uchiha dither from his lackadaisical archetype. The emotion and caring he displayed was only brought on by dire situations.

So what did Suigetsu see? Did Sasuke mention her during his travels? Did Orochimaru uncover some secret from their Genin days? Like…like when Sasuke had almost kissed her on that stone bench, perhaps?

Her head feels bubbly, but she wouldn't speak from her heart.

"What exactly are you getting at?" Sakura bites out.

Sasuke had intense feelings for Sakura as a Genin, that much was true. She was an important person—a precious person—just like Kakashi and Naruto.

Things had swayed Sasuke from his righteous path. Your brother murdering your entire clan, and finding out that the village you'd called home had orchestrated the whole thing tended to bring the worst out of people.

With this information, Sakura knew that Sasuke didn't have time to worry about unwanted affections and love confessions.

But Suigetsu knew something that Sakura didn't.

Suigetsu knew about the night Sasuke left.

The cunning man senses her turmoil. Thinking quickly, he makes up a story that will tease Sasuke, but keep Sakura out of the loop at the same time. It was best not to divulge all of his intelligence at once.

"Ah, well, I'm just curious. I left a girl back home, you see. I was distant and cold most of the time. I put up my shields and purposely locked her out, because I had more important things to do."

Sakura frowns at this, removing herself from Sasuke to cross her arms and face Suigetsu fully. "…More important things than playing around with someone's feelings?"

Suigetsu folds his arms behind his head. Like a tuna trapped in a fishnet, she's been ensnared. He takes a deep breath and leans in close, so close that Sakura can smell the saltwater of his skin. "These…things…were my reason for existence. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I hadn't have done them."

She furrows her eyebrows.

"Before I left, I never told her how I felt. But I did something."

He can feel the pins and needles of Sasuke's glare, brought back up full force. Oh, he knows what Suigetsu is talking about all right. The white-haired man walks a lazy circle around Sakura, keeping well out of Sasuke's range, because he knows exactly how to play this game.

With an overly dramatic, heavy sigh he says: "I kissed her."

Sasuke's mind is reeling. Who did he have contact with? Questions pop in and out of his psyche as he roams through the short list of people who actually knew about his last contact with the emerald-eyed, pink-haired young woman.

Kakashi wouldn't blather about unimportant things, especially to ninja he had no meaningful connections with. He was immediately ruled out.

Naruto had always been a loudmouth, but he respected both Sasuke and Sakura enough to keep their past private. Besides, he rarely left Hinata's side now that she was pregnant, and Sasuke couldn't see the two of them hanging out with someone as ill-tempered as Suigetsu.

He and Shikamaru had no more qualms, right?

So then…who?

Who?

"Anyways," Suigetsu finishes, looking guiltlessly towards his Boss's girlfriend—or whatever the hell they were. "How would you feel if you were in my situation? How would you feel if you found out that you really meant something to Sasuke all along?"

Sakura curls her fingers into a fist as he toes his sandal into the wet ground and draws invisible hearts over the soil.

Che, like she'd fall for that.

Sakura didn't find Suigetsu's expressiveness all that random. As a kunoichi, and as a doctor, she had held cold hands by airless bedsides as people confessed all sorts of misdeeds and revelations. She was bright and open, giving off the appearance of trustworthiness from the clarity of her jade eyes.

Sakura was an analogist, too. She saw every corner of a situation, top and bottom, to find the answer hidden amongst context clues. Perhaps this was why she was so great at genjutsu aversion. Perhaps this was why she saw right through the flirtatious advances a handful of men had thrown at her.

Perhaps this is why Suigetsu's fake timidity does not fool her. Suigetsu isn't as good at reading her as he thinks. She can see his ploy just as easily as Sasuke can.

The blue-hued maniac is playing sweet, rubbing his thumbs together and throwing his eyes downwards to give off the appearance of purity.

Sakura doesn't know what's going on—there's no way she could guess it. She can still sense the underlying ruse, and she figured that he just wants Sakura to say that his actions were completely understandable. Suigetsu wants her to make him feel better about being a shitty person…perhaps something had happened between him and Sasuke during their travels that brought this out.

Whatever this was, she wasn't buying it. So, when she finally forces out the words, both Suigetsu and Sasuke are both equally surprised.

"You want to know how I would feel if Sasuke kissed me before he left the first time? Alright, I'll tell you." And in this moment, she thinks of what Suigetsu's woman should say to him, for being such a pig, and for speaking so easily about her heartbreak. "I'd hate him."