Chapter 41:

There was nothing like true silence. It was a beautiful thing—that moment of pure nothingness that allowed one to hear their own blood, rushing within their bodies to the cadence of a systematic heartbeat.

Within that quietness, Sasuke could see the days from long ago. His memory was of the photographic kind, vast and perfect, viewing every detail of every insignificant scene he'd ever experienced. He can see the blues of a summer sky and the brown of worn bark on an old tree and grass so green it was almost blinding.

Throughout all of these still photographs of days long and not so long ago; two colors seemed to be more vivid than their surround landscapes—even among rivers of magma between different dimensions.

Pink and Orange; Sakura and Naruto

Sasuke can almost feel the tickle of her hair against his cheek. Long tendrils of overflowing puce, framing round cheeks and hiding the irises much brighter than that blinding green grass—a young Sakura, a teenage Sakura, an adult Sakura.

Naruto was bold. He was both lightning and the wind, thunderous in voice and brilliantly unsubtle, though the way of the ninja called differently. Naruto's extended fist is the most distinct scene in all of this sleep, right behind the puckered face he'd make after every one of Sasuke's powerful punches.

As Sasuke starts to wake, a new Naruto forms before him in a black haze. An older version, with a broken, earthen sake bottle flying straight towards Sasuke's head...

Sasuke wrenches his eyes open, just catching the end of a conversation.

"So, he was telling the truth then?!"

The rush of blood still flows heavily within Sasuke's ears. It's almost like he's underwater, swimming below layers of sticky grime. Damn…this hurts…

"I've already told you that! Now get Sasuke another towel, He's still…leaking. You've really done it this time. Sakura won't be impressed."

"Well, what was I supposed to do, Kakashi? Let him walk away from me after announcing a surprise like that?

"You weren't supposed to crack open his skull, that's for sure. How is that even an option that pops up in your head?"

There's a scoff. "I just hit him in a weak spot s'all. "

"A weak spot…? A weak spot? Your entire head is a weak spot! He's still bleeding!"

"That's because he's got a'lotta blood in 'em."

Sasuke's entire face feels numb, from forehead to chin, and even his teeth tingle like they'd been ground down to nubs. With a groan, the man reaches back to the base of his head, where it feels the least painful and strangely, the most wet.

"Oh, good, you're up."

Sasuke smells Naruto before he sees him. The scent of alcohol is enough to make the man want to vomit. Sasuke can't even mutter a proper string of curse words. Pulling his hand away, he's unsurprised to see red smudges on his palm and fingertips.

"Naruto," Kakashi chides. "Don't start with the questions just yet."

The man shakes his head, his blonde spikes much too short to move like they used to. "Sasuke doesn't have the luxury of time. You've already called Sakura. I'd say he's got five minutes before she comes in here, I tell her everything I know and she murders everyone on sight."

"That's suicide!" Kakashi mutters. "I should probably go…I've got an exam to host tomorrow…and there's an old lady that needs me to carry her groceries…and a black cat usually crosses the left entrance at dusk so I haven't much time…"

The throbbing from Sasuke's nape is starting to get stronger, but he lifts himself up despite the soreness. There's a deep red circle marked in the wood of Kakashi's bench. A familiar orange jumpsuit top clings to the body fluid flowing from Sasuke, and he realizes why Naruto's odor had been so strong.

With a disgusted sneer, he throws the jacket to the ground and pulls off his own top in one swift movement. As he presses the black material into his wound, he hisses. "You're a maniac."

"No, you!" Naruto retorts. He's been thinking of the right words to say for a good half-hour, but all of that is thrown out of the window. "You're a maniac and an asshole, and you've really done it this time."

"Get over it." The man snaps back. "Stop sticking your nose in my business."

"What are you not getting? It's not just your business. What happens when Sakura tries to get married to someone else and the village denies her request because she already has a HUSBAND who is out ROAMING THE WORLD a thousand miles away? Or better yet, flittering between dimensions…?"

Sasuke groans, squeezing his eyes shut once more. "It's not like that."

"Then what's it like? Tell me, or I'll tell her what I think it's like. I'll tell her everything I've got on you, and she'll grind you into dust. I'll scatter your ashes over Training Ground 3 and I won't even cry."

"You're going to cry if you don't shut up." Sasuke threatens, though he hardly looks menacing enough to do it properly. Everything hurt. Even thinking.

Kakashi stuffs several scrolls into a large leather satchel. "The Uchiha do things differently, dear Naruto. There's nothing that I can do to reverse, block, or otherwise worry about involving myself in. They're a very private peoples. Were. Are?" He clears his throat.

"So that's it then? Not even Sakura gets a say?"

Both Kakashi and Naruto train their eyes on Sasuke as they wait for an answer. Not even the Hogake knew the intricacies of the Uchiha. The history of Sasuke's people lay in ruin beneath Konoha. Halls, tunnels and undisclosed rooms gathered dust and decayed. There were places that no one but an Uchiha can enter, and Sasuke is too plagued by the past to cross those thresholds.

Sasuke stares at the blood on his hand—his own blood. Finding nowhere to vent his frustration properly, Sasuke kicks the nearest chair, making the plastic thing slide across the room, flip over and clamber to the ground.

Kakashi ties his satchel shut and then adjusts the strap over his shoulder, ready to abandon his office at the first sight of his former female student. This certainly wasn't how the Hokage offices were supposed to be used… Call him a pushover, call him nosy, but don't call him stupid.

Sasuke sighs. "The Uchiha…were often married to other Uchiha."

"Gross." Naruto interjects. Sasuke nods his head in agreement and continues.

"It kept the bloodline pure. It also kept things…in the family, so to speak. And while civilians and lesser clans would go to Konoha to bind themselves under law, Uchiha would go to the clan head. My father, Fugaku."

"Right, right" Naruto says, looking thoughtfully, speaking soberly though he'd just been drunk not but a half hour previously. "But your dad's dead."

Sasuke speaks through his teeth. "Yes, idiot, I know my dad's dead."

The blond grabs his hair in frustration. "Who's the patriarch then, if you're the only one left? This isn't making any sense!"

Kakashi, sensing Sasuke's annoyance, decides to offer the man help. It was nice to feel like a teacher again, instead of being bullied into submission. Kids grow up fast these days.

"Naruto, think for a moment." The silver-haired man begins, speaking as though Naruto were a child. "If Sasuke is the only Uchiha, he is also the leader of the Uchiha.

"Oh,"

"Oh…"

"Okay…so Sasuke can marry whoever he wants. Fine. But Sakura's not an Uchiha! I mean, maybe she is now, but she wasn't before they got married—"

"Sakura's not married," Sasuke interjects. "I am."

"WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN!? THAT'S NOT HOW THINGS WORK—THAT'S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS WORKS!"

Kakashi crosses his arms. "Sasuke's clan has a…different view on marriage. It isn't a piece of paper you frame and hang in your hallway—no offence Naruto."

"None taken."

Sasuke looks up at the ceiling, at the impossibly high walls, ignoring the steady throb from his Naruto-inflicted injury. "It's a spiritual binding. I'm sword to her, mamoru…to protect, and teikyo…to provide—I'll be hers, forever. It's been sealed."

"Like a jutsu?"

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, amused by the revelation that had obviously gone over Naruto's head. "Wow, you two…? Well, that's it then. Clan leader, consummation, congratulations. In the eyes of Konoha, Sasuke Uchiha, you're bound eternally to Sakura Haruno. See ya,"

Naruto throws his hands up into the air, catching Kakashi by the shoulder. "How is this OK! Sakura doesn't know! Marriage is a partnership… It's not just…just…belonging to someone."

"Sakura can still get married, Naruto. She can do what she wants. The only person…really affected by this is Sasuke. And I'm assuming he knows what the punishment is for violating his promise."

Sasuke nods. Death.

It's still confusing to Naruto. He couldn't understand… "Why would you do something like that without telling Sakura?"

Sasuke shrugs. "She doesn't get a say in how I decide to devote my life. Neither do you."

"And if she falls in love with someone else?"

"She'll continue to be entitled to me. Whatever she wants from me—whatever I can provide."

Naruto opens his mouth for one final retort, but it was too late. The doctor had arrived.

Sakura wasn't one for big entrances. That was a Naruto trope. Right now, she could understand why it was a favorite of his. She felt a little…flattered…to receive the full attention of the room. Her heart thrummed as she pulled on her black gloves and gestured Ino towards the hallway. "Water—and towels. The infirmary is right down the hallway."

Approaching Sasuke Uchiha, who was bleeding and pale, she gently moves his hands. He had been pressing his balled up T-shirt to the wound—a four inch gash that would need healing. She narrows her eyes.

"Can you explain to me why you have a hole in the back of your head?"

"…no."

Naruto looks at the floor, and Kakashi, at the wall.

Ino comes back with cleaning supplies and blue medical gloves. She sets her bucket down and squirts a foaming cleaning solution into the water, and with a covered hand, dips a cloth into the liquid. Before she starts to clean Sasuke, she asks, "Do you mind if I remove some of this blood?"

Sasuke doesn't answer. Head bowed, giving Sakura access to the bash on his head, he doesn't want to cause more work for her. Although he didn't quite understand the tiers involving medical personnel, the one fixing the wound usually didn't have to do the grunt work of cleaning it up.

As Sakura pokes around the tender flesh of his scalp, she feels him stiffen significantly just as the cool rag touches his skin. "I'm sorry, did that hurt?"

"No," he says through clenched teeth.

Ino is quick and professional, and Sakura nods as she sends chakra to the palm of her hand. Although Sasuke does not seem to relax, the blood coagulates and the skin mends together beautifully.

Sakura looks over her shoulder to Naruto, who looks guilty and disheveled. An elegant, pink brow rises up high on her forehead. "Did you do this?"

Kakashi, who feels as though he owed the kid just a bit of help, interjects. "Naruto said it was...a freak attack."

Sasuke scoffs, and the medic takes notice. She finishes healing him quickly and grabs a rag from the stack beside Ino, who had cleaned all of the visible blood from Sasuke's upper torso. Sakura moves the locks of Sasuke's hair and dampens it, removing the rest of the debris. Glass…no…clay?

Sakura steps back, sets the rag down, and places her hands on her hips. She eyes Sasuke intently, who meets her gaze guiltlessly. Then, she regards Naruto and Kakashi, who both refuse to meet her gaze.

"Who hit Sasuke in the head with a bottle of wine?"

Naruto whips his head upwards. "It was sake, not wine."

"Naruto,"

"Alright. It was me. But I didn't mean to. It was a knee-jerk reaction!"

"Okay," Sakura begins, crossing her arms now. "So where did this happen?"

"At the bar across town."

"Right. At the bar across town. Isn't my house closer to the bar across town? What made you skip not only my house, but the hospital as well, and run straight here to Kakashi?"

Busted.

With Kakashi and Naruto both tight-lipped, Sakura rolls her eyes and removes her black gloves. "Fine, don't tell me. You know I have a way of finding this stuff out. It's your funeral. You can leave."

Kakashi is the first out the door, even though it was his office in the first place. Ino gathers the soiled medical supplies and follows after. She drops a towel on the way out, and Naruto quickly picks it up. "I'll help!"

Now, they're alone.

Sasuke's shoulders visibly drop and he leans back on the bench, felling only a little soreness compared to the mind-throbbing pain from before. Although his eyes are closed, he can feel Sakura take a seat next to him. She timidly reaches out for his pinky, as if to say without words, Are you okay?

"So, did you really hit him?" Ino whispers as she crouches down low. The door to the Hokage's office is opened just enough to see Sasuke, but not Sakura, who sat beside him on a long wooden pew.

"Oh, hell yeah. I knocked him clean out."

"Nice. Wish I could."

Naruto is right above her, peeking in on the couple as well. Neither had bothered to actually put anything up. Both of them were curious, curious creatures.

"Can you see anything?" Naruto whispers.

"Just Sasuke. Can you hear anything?"

"Oh yeah, I can hear everything. Fox demon, remember? I can smell everything too. You got any more strawberries on you?"

Ino rolls her eyes.

Back within the room, Sasuke is quiet as he leans his forearms onto the tops of his thighs, successfully blocking his face and showing Ino and Naruto—who remain hidden—the angry red gash on the top of his head. He is thinking. He is thinking about what Naruto will say to Sakura given the chance. Or Suigetsu. Or Shikamaru. He squeezes his eyes shut again.

"Are you still hurting?" Sakura asks.

"Not physically."

Sakura places her hand gently on Sasuke's bare shoulder. "You can tell me if it was Naruto that did this. I promise not to kill him."

Naruto and Ino exchange weary looks.

Sasuke leans away from her touch but still refuses to speak. He reaches for his shirt which had been abandoned on the side-table, and starts to unravel it. It's dark enough to hide the stain of blood, but it feels gross and crusty in his hand. He tosses it on the ground by his feet and looks straight ahead at the chair he'd kicked earlier.

Sakura stands up and disrupts his glare, forcing him to look at her. "I don't know what's going on. I don't know what Naruto did, or what I did, or why you got hurt. But I didn't do anything wrong. I don't deserve the silent treatment. Or to be ignored."

Ino whispers as silently as she can, shifting from one foot to the other. "Uh oh, trouble in paradise. I've never heard her talk to him like that!"

Naruto shrugs. "She's been…really speaking her mind lately."

Sasuke reaches towards Sakura and pulls her in, keeping both hands on her lower back, and presses his forehead against her abdomen. Staring at her black, open-toed sandals, he breathes out exasperatedly. "I'm leaving. Tomorrow."

Sakura isn't surprised. She smiles, though happiness does not meet her eyes. She knew that the day would come when he would have to go back into the wilds, until Konoha needed him. She had expected him to just go—to not say anything at all. At least he was being polite about it.

"Of course,"

Sasuke feels like he's disappointing her. That's all he'll ever do, and be. Disappointing. "You're upset with me."

Sakura pulls away from him and shakes her head fervently, furrowing eyebrows together in confusion. "I understand why you have to go, Sasuke. I hate that you're leaving, but I know why you've made that choice. I can't be upset with you for that."

"It's not a choice," he says, pressings his fingertips into skin. He wants to explain. He wants to tell her that it has nothing to do with his feelings for her. "I'm obliged."

It's an intimate gesture, but Sakura is sure that she can get away with it in this moment. She cradles his face in her hands, letting strands of black hair wisp away and frame his dark, unequal eyes. He looks up at her and meets her gaze. They are communicating silently.

Color blossoms to his cheeks and both Ino and Naruto stare, still, like statues. The heat starts to spread over the bridge of his nose, and his eyebrows turn up while his lips turn down into a frown that holds sadness. Is this…a different person? Is this…the Sasuke only Sakura knows?.

"You're...protecting all of us." She begins. "You're protecting me, and I am so appreciative of that. Thank you for caring enough to make this sacrifice."

He can feel her hands begin to tremble.

"I am...I am so proud of you, even if it hurts me that you'll have to be away. You're doing the right thing. I just wish I…I just wish I could be with you."

Her fingertips glide over his cheeks down to his chin, where she can prop it up gently. Her body moves closer, craving his lips, because no matter how many kisses they share it will never be enough. She knows she hasn't much time before her friends show back up. She knows that she hasn't much time with him at all. And every moment counted.

Every second meant so much.

In amazement, Ino and Naruto watch as Sakura bends low and Sasuke grips the back of her shirt. He tugs, guiding the dainty girl atop his lap and deepening their contact. He cannot control himself in Sakura's presence, and it both scares and excites him. He wants as much of her as she will give. And when he breaks away, smoothing his mouth down along the curve of her neck to her covered shoulder, his black eye turns red and locks on to the eavesdroppers just beyond the slightly opened door.

Ino and Naruto have been caught.

It was hard for Sasuke to allow someone to see such weakness. This tiny woman, with healing hands and cotton-candy hair, has turned him red. She has sent him spiraling. She has captured him, like a bird in a cage. And he loves it.

And he loves her.

Ino and Naruto finish laundering the towels and putting away all of the medical supplies. It's late, and Naruto has a big day tomorrow. But they've both just witnessed a stunning event, and they bond over the shock.

"I've never had the sharingan on me like that. That was intimidating. I don't know how you got the guts to fight him."

"Meh," Naruto begins as he folds another rag. "That's the thing with Sasuke. If he wanted to kill you, he would. There's no point in worrying about it."

Ino re-folds all of the rags Naruto had bunched together. That…makes me feel worse.

"I bet he wants me dead. I think I've been an awful friend here lately."

"Me too,"

They both look at each other.

Sakura was so important to them. They understand that they both crossed boundaries, and that Sakura shouldn't have had to defend her point of view. It makes their stomachs churn—the guilt—and they share matching expressions.

After cleaning, they both walk out together. Naruto is chivalrous, and offers to walk Ino home, but she declines. He'd have to go the opposite direction of his and Hinata's house, and then all the way back. He had a big day tomorrow.

"I'll see you tomorrow. She says, plainly. She had much on her mind.

A trickle of moonlight seeps from between blackout curtains. Shadows move slowly around the room, dancing to the oscillating fan that circulates heavy, hazy air.

Sakura drags sleepy kisses along Sasuke's arm, sliding her fingers between his. She is too tired to sleep—too anxious, too sad. Today, The Jōnin Exams start. Tonight, Sasuke will leave her.

"Are you awake?" Sakura asks softly.

"Go to sleep." Sasuke replies.

It had been a long day for both of them, in between practice and drinking, and bar fights and healing. Yet, Sakura cannot even close her eyes. Instead, young woman turns away.

At this, Sasuke wakes. He blinks rapidly, adjusting to the grays of the bedroom.

"You'll pass the exams," He says groggily. "You're strong."

Sakura laughs. Oh, he had no idea how much his praise meant to her. It was music. Still, while she worried for her new rank in the ninja world, she also worried about the after. How much she will miss him.

"It's not just that…I don't want you to go."

"I love you with all my heart! If you were to stay with me…there would be no regrets. Because every day we'd do something fun. We'd be happy…I swear! So…I would do anything for you! Please, just stay with me!"

Sasuke turns, pressing his chest against her back and placing his hand upon her hip. It's the same person—although not a girl anymore. But it's the same thing, Sasuke leaving, Sakura not wanting him to go. That was all this relationship was destined to be, wasn't it? It was full of unspoken words, and daydreams of a future that would never be.

"Don't worry about later," His voice is low, his nose and lips press against her ear. "Be with me now."

Lidding mismatched eyes, the shinobi reaches out to the woman beside him and gathers her form tightly against his own. Through this closeness—chest to chest, hip to hip—Sasuke craves to be even closer.

Sakura presses her lips to his chin, and then to the corner of his mouth. "I want you."

He responds. "Me too,"

"No," No, Sasuke doesn't understand. She doesn't just crave his body, or his praise.

Shaking her head, she throws her leg over his hip and leverages herself upwards, pressing him deeply into the plushness of her bed. Sakura can feel his want at the apex of her legs. She knows this want. This is the natural reaction to attraction. Even strangers can share this want.

Sitting atop him, she bites her lip, trying to make him understand. "No, I want you."

Sasuke furrows his eyebrows. He's confused by the anguished in her features. Sakura's eyes seem to glow, shimmering with tears that were on the verge of spilling.

What did he do wrong? "I want you too, Sakura."

When he reaches out to her with his dominant hand, he frowns. This is not his flesh that is going to touch her. The tingling of that limb is unbearable in that moment, and more than anything he wishes to rip it off so that only he can touch her like this.

She is so beautiful, and mournful, in the obsidian of her bedroom.

Sakura wants Sasuke to love her. To be with her. She doesn't want him to find another woman to make Uchiha children with. She's worried that, on his travels, he will forget all about the whiney, depressed, too-strong-for-her-own-good girl that preoccupied his time turning these last few months. It terrifies her.

Sasuke is worried that he's not enough for her. He is worried that no matter how strong his feelings are, how hard he tries to get through to her, that it's all wrong. He is undeserving of her love, yet so appreciative of it. He craves it, bathes in it, devours it.

Two jumbled souls battle their own minds, unaware of the truth that is thriving in the womb of her narrowed abdomen— the proof of their love.

Rarely has Sasuke ever been afraid of anything. Yet, his hands tremble and his ribs are getting hammered by the nervous cadence within him.

What should he do to make her understand?

How can he show her that she means so much to him?

Her voice starts to catch and he chances a glance, only to have his stomach clench at the disdained expression that she portrays. It's so much like the girl he left behind. And it fucking sucks, because this time he is not leaving to fight his country, but to fight for his country. A good, just fight.

When Sakura's eyes open, she sees the fullness of Sasuke's face and the luminance in his divergent eyes. Her tears fall thickly and roll down the edges of his high cheekbones. He looks like a painting. Embarrassed, the woman brushes away her own saltine droplets before wiping his face as well.

Yet…somehow, wetness still gathers on Sasuke's face, and it takes her a brief, shocked moment to realize that it's not her tears she's wiping away.

He has never looked so broken to her. His voice had never been so feeble. "I'm sorry."

I'm sorry I can't be the one you deserve.

Sakura wraps her legs tighter around him, letting his wet face press into the dip of her neck as they curse this world they live in. It was strange, seeing the strongest person you knew in such a fragile state.

"Don't be sorry," Sakura says. "I'm the one who is sorry. We all have jobs to do. I shouldn't be acting like a spoiled brat."

"You're not a brat." He moves his hands low on her back and watches her hard, determined face as she speaks.

"I'm going to stop this hatred, Sasuke." She begins. "I'm going to become a Jōnin, and I'm going to open a mental health clinic for children. No more kids will feel alone. No one will ever feel like how you Naruto and many of our enemies felt. I'll stop it."

He is completely amazed at the change in her demeanor. Her hands squeeze his shoulders tightly. She is in a different world right now. He rarely gets to see this side of her, this fire.

"You need to leave, even if I don't want you to. You need to protect us, so I can protect them. Okay? So let's cry and say our goodbyes, and then tomorrow we can both become Jōnin and make a better future for everyone."

He nods, listening intently.

"Of course I'm going to miss you, but I'm strong. I can handle this! I'm not a child, I won't beg you to stay like one. And…and I'll be too busy with work anyways. My goals aren't going to be easy to complete."

"Sakura,"

"We can write you letters if you want. I'll send you photos when Naruto has his baby, and maybe if I have a mission we can meet up and—"

Before she can say anything else, Sasuke has claims the sweetness of her mouth. Sasuke consumes the sentences she will never get a chance to utter. His hands find her thighs, working up the hem of a black, silky nightgown that hid the silk of her skin.

pulls away briefly, only to tug off the material, but the rosy flush of her body halts him in his tracks.

Naked, straddling his upper legs, sits womanhood in its most perfect form. Tendrils of pink cascade over her breasts like a waterfall. Down the fleshy dip of a bare midriff and between the valleys of her legs sits black lace, shear enough to see only slight hints of peach. His hands reach out to touch her, following valleys and hills, settling on the tops of two deliciously powerful thighs. His fingers follow the path her stretchmarks had drawn.

"You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen." And for tonight, she's his.

Sakura tries not to laugh. Her smile holds humor, though. "You don't mean that."

He cannot possibly mean it. Of all of the women he's probably been with…the most striking about Sakura is her hair. She didn't have large breasts or long legs—nothing about her was conventionally attractive. Still, it was a flattering thing to hear. Especially from Sasuke. "But…thank you anyways."

Furrowing his eyebrows, Sasuke says firmly, "I do mean it."

"And when do I seem beautiful to you?" She asks. The woman moves his hands to the swell of her hips, where lacy cloths wraps around and covers her. She rolls herself along his pubic bone. "Am I beautiful when I do this?"

The friction is addicting. His muscles clench at her movements and he falls down in to her bedding. "You're always beautiful."

This time, she laughs aloud. "And when did you make that revelation? I bet you call all the girls that ride you beautiful."

Sasuke blinks. Suddenly he doesn't see Sakura anymore. He sees pure white skin and red-lined eyes. Black hair twists in a katsuyama style, adorned with flowers and trinkets that move with each naked bounce.

No.

"Only you," He replies just above a whisper.

"Since when?"

"Always,"

Always. When she was just a girl with ribbons in her hair—when she was a woman, writhing beneath him—when she cried, when she sang, and even when she slept. She was beautiful before he loved her, when they were children and innocent and pure. She's never been anything but.

"I am not…good…with these things." He begins, dancing his fingertips along the elastic of her panties. "I am not a poet. My words aren't as soft as you deserve them to be."

Sasuke wanted to bury himself within her. Fall into the warmth of her body; take all that she had to give.

"But I cannot think of a time in my life, from the moment I first saw you, when I didn't think of you as beautiful. Being your classmate, your teammate, your enemy—I have wanted you since I knew how to want." Sasuke turns, guiding the kunoichi onto her back and pressing his lips to hers urgently. "Let me show you how much you mean to me."