Hyperdimension Neptunia belongs to Compile Heart, Idea Factory, Sega and whomever else worked on it.

Sighing as she flopped, face first, onto her bed, Neptune groaned softly. "Urgh, been so long." She felt so tired and stiff. "Lousy ancient Tari CPU." After she had gotten back and dealt with the whole Rei Ryghts situation, Histoire had forced her to sit down and do a ton of paperwork.

Neptune pouted and grumbled at that, she had wanted to hang out with Plutia, catch up with Noire, Vert and Blanc of her home dimension, hang out with Nepgear and do stuff with her little sister some more. 'I really need to make up with Nepgear too, I was pretty mean to her in Plutie's world.'

Slowly rolling onto her back, Neptune groaned as she looked up at the ceiling. Even though she had gotten caught up on the work at a speed that impressed Histoire, she was so worn out. "At least Histy said I could take a couple days off to recover now. But I thought there'd be more paperwork."

"That's because I was covering for you."

"Noire?" Neptune turned her head and blinked as she saw Noire, her Noire, not the other Noire, standing in her bedroom in her dress and stockings with a pensive look on her face. Neptune smiled softly and sat up. "I missed you."

Noire huffed, crossed her arms and looked away in anger, causing Neptune to look at her in confusion. "No you didn't. You had the better Noire for all that time."

"Huh?" Neptune could admit that she wasn't the tastiest pudding in the fridge, but this was really confusing her. "What are you talking about?"

"You know what I mean." Noire gave Neptune an angry look. "Nepgear, Uni, Rom, Ram all say the same thing, even the other CPUs say that she's friendlier and easier to be around than I am."

"Noire..." Neptune sat up, a worried look on her face. "Come on, it's not..."

"Yes it is." Noire huffed in anger. "Go on, you're the only one who hasn't said it yet. Go on, tell me that she's more fun to be around and easier to understand or something."

Neptune pursed her lips, she was tired and really wanted to get some sleep, but she could see this was really bothering Noire. Patting the bed next to her, she gave Noire a smile. "Come on, sit down, let's talk."

Sighing softly, Noire looked at Neptune's expectant look before grumbling and walking over to the bed. Smoothing out her skirt, she sat next to the shorter CPU. "So talk." Her eyes widened when Neptune suddenly hugged her and rested her head on Noire's chest. "H...Hey!"

"Mmm... Missed you so much." Neptune rocked softly while she nuzzled her head on Noire's breasts while closing her eyes.

"H...Hey!" Noire's face was bright red. She looked at Neptune, who was just cuddling her and she slowly, gently, reached around Neptune and put her arm around Neptune's back, hugging her back. "You don't need to lie to me. You had better Noire for how long?"

Neptune mentally sighed. "I was gone for twenty years, Noire. Half that time I was getting my cute little butt beaten around by P-Ko. By the way, thanks for looking after Planeptune while I was gone." She shifted her head up and gave Noire a gentle smile. "But if anyone's the better Noire, you are."

Noire gave her a confused, but slightly hopeful look. "What do you mean?"

Neptune let go of the hug and sighed, stretching her arms over her head and groaning in pleasure. "Well..." She lowered her arms and smiled at Noire. "Imma compare you and other Noire, okay?" Noire nodded, wondering what Neptune was going to say. "Yeah, she's easier to understand than you are. She doesn't bottle up how she feels like you do, she's got a sharp tongue and doesn't put up with much."

Noire's face darkened at hearing that. "I see..."

"And, yeah, I got along with her just fine." Neptune smiled to herself. "We weren't enemies and rivals there, so it was easier for us to develop combination attacks and such."

"I guess you liked her too, huh?" Noire asked softly.

Neptune nodded. "Yeah. She was probably my best friend over there." She didn't see Noire's twitching at that.

"I see..." Noire sighed softly as she looked down, her shoulders slumped. "I guess you liked it better there, huh?"

"Huh?" Neptune turned to look at Noire and she paused at the sad look on Noire's face. "Noire?"

"I mean, everyone thinks she's a better me, right? I don't know why you bothered coming back then, you could just have the better Noire and..." Noire's rambling was cut off as Neptune tackled her onto the bed. "Ngh!" She grimaced and opened her eyes to see Neptune looking at her with watery eyes. "...What's with that look?"

"I don't want to stay there any longer. I wanted to come home ten years ago. Sure, I wanted to save P-Ko, but I missed Histy, I missed Nepgear, and I missed you."

Noire's face flushed slightly, but she had a troubled look on her face. "But you called the other me your best friend. You never once called me your best friend. And how many times did you call me your friend?"

"All the time." Neptune giggled at Noire. "Even before we got captured and tentacled for three years, I was calling you my friend."

Noire's face reddened a bit more. "You just made our getting captured and our shares being drained out of us sound perverted."

Neptune giggled at that. "Maybe a little, but, yeah, the other you is probably my best friend over there."

"...So what does that make me?" Noire asked before looking at Neptune in confusion as the shorter CPU's face turned pink.

"...You're my wife."

"HUH?!" If Noire's eyes got any wider, they would have burst out of her skull while her face turned bright red. "What do you mean? Don't tell me that you got your phrases mixed up again."

Neptune thought about it for a moment before nodding. "Like I said, the other you has a sharper tongue than you do, she doesn't put up with stuff like you do, she'll call anyone out when they're acting stupid, she doesn't hide her emotions as much as you do, even if she's a Tsundere like you. She acts like a really good friend, but you're a much better wife than she could be." Both of them were blushing at that moment as Neptune continued to ramble. "You're calmer than she is, you put up with me when I do stupid stuff, you're more shy than she is, which I find really cute, you never threw me out of your Basilicom when I snuck over and crawled in bed with you like she did."

Noire gave Neptune a flat stare. "You snuck into her bed?"

Neptune had a troubled look on her face and nodded softly. "I...I really missed you, sometimes I wanted someone to cuddle, and Plutie has a death grip when she cuddles at night. And, I'm sorry, but the other you smells just like you. Sometimes, I..." Neptune suddenly pressed her body against Noire's and trembled. "I really missed you, sometimes I couldn't stand it and snuck into her bed to cuddle with her. She threw me out every time she caught me in her bed."

"Neptune..." Noire sighed softly and hugged her. "Want me to spend the night?" Neptune nodded and Noire rubbed her back. "Can I ask you something?"

"Hmm?"

Noire had a troubled look on her face but she pressed forward. "If you were stuck there forever, would you have... Would you have made a move on her?"

"Nah." Neptune shook her head and lifted her head to smile at Noire. "It would feel too weird." Noire gave her a pointed look and Neptune sighed. "...Maybe I would have. Some days it was hard to be around her. But you know, she's a really hard worker, unlike you."

Noire gave her an annoyed look at that. "What was that? I'll have you know that I'm a harder worker than you are."

Neptune gave Noire an amused look. "Uh huh, and who kept coming over to my Basilicom every day after Nepgear killed the Deity of Sin to play games from morning until night and let her little sister run her country?"

Noire scoffed at her. "Just because I'd rather play games and cosplay doesn't make me lazy, even if I've gotten plenty of lectures from Histoire about doing my job. Besides, at least my level didn't drop to one like yours did."

Both of them looked at each other before they started laughing and Noire hugged Neptune again. "I know it was only three weeks for me, but I really missed you, you goof."

"I missed you too, Noire." Neptune hugged Noire back and felt herself relaxing in Noire's arms.

It didn't take long for either of them to fall asleep. When they woke up in the morning, they would both agree it was the best sleep they had in ages.

Why did I write this? I dunno, but it's nice.

And before any of you say "Noire's a really hard worker", you should know that Noire from the Hyper Dimension is about as lazy as Neptune is. Histoire got fed up with her, Blanc and Vert skimping out on their duties for three years as they came over to play games with Neptune constantly. If you remember at the start of Victory, Noire, Vert and Blanc quickly fled when Histoire started to go into a rant, meaning they've gotten her lectures like Neptune and Nepgear have. In VII, Noire wanted to give up being a CPU and become an idol and voice actress. Even Uni was shocked at Noire's selfishness. And then in the true ending, Noire was complaining about having to work hard after the CPU Shift Period and Neptune, of all people, wasn't.

I have more observations that I have written down if you want to know, I can PM them to you. Careful though, your image of Noire will be forever destroyed.