disclaimer: I do not own the characters from When Calls the Heart. They belong to Janette Oke & Hallmark Channel. Anything that sounds familiar with dialogue is from the show.
Enjoy the story :)
Two days. It's been two days since Nathan Grant poured out his heart to Elizabeth Thornton. Two days since Elizabeth ran away from him and cried until she couldn't anymore. Two days since they last spoke to each other. And two days of questions remaining unanswered. Who knew two days felt like an eternity away from someone who meant everything to you?
The moment that changed things between them kept replaying in Elizabeth's mind on a constant loop. She kept feeling an immediate fear resurface when remembering Nathan speak those three simple but life altering words. Almost like the safety of their friendship was ripped away.
"Elizabeth I love you"
He loved her? Somehow she already knew that but the words spoken out loud felt too real. Like once they were spoken into the air, they held a weight of expectations to move forward into the unknown territory of a relationship. Which meant more pressure for Elizabeth to face the truth. And the truth was something she wasn't ready to face quite yet.
"I would quit…. I quit the Mounties"
"No"
Quit the Mounties? How could she let him do that? Would he even be willing to do that or was he caught up in the heat of the moment? No, she wouldn't let him do it.
The best course of action was to keep her distance. She couldn't get closer to another Mountie. That line of work was too dangerous. But what would be the difference of worrying about him from a distance? Just the thought of losing Nathan felt too unbearable to even comprehend.
A knock on the door interrupted Elizabeth's swirling thoughts. Opening the front door, it revealed the one person Elizabeth couldn't stop thinking about. Nathan.
"Hi, Mrs. Thornton. I picked these for you today"
Finally noticing Allie's presence, Elizabeth observed the small flowers bundled together with a string in the girl's hand.
"Thank you, Allie!" Elizabeth genuinely smiled at the young girl as she received the beautiful flowers.
"What have you got there Jack?" Allie's voice carried along through the row-house as she made her way towards the young boy.
Elizabeth barely heard the girl as she looked back at Nathan still standing outside on the porch with his hands in his pockets. Nathan looked over at her hesitantly with uncertainty flowing off him and hurt held within his eyes. Elizabeth broke the strained silence first.
"I didn't think you would still come tonight"
"I didn't want to break my word" Nathan briefly looked at the ground before looking at her again. "Though I didn't know if you still wanted me to come"
"Well I…." Elizabeth stopped herself from finishing her original thought and took a moment to collect her thoughts properly. Saying something without thinking would be her down fall. She looked at him again with a forced smile, "I've made roast. I hope you're hungry"
"Sure am" Nathan answered briefly as he stepped inside her home. Okay so dodging the elephant in the room was apparently what they would be doing tonight. He decided that this was going to be a long night. Observing his surroundings, he instantly noticed all the picture frames on the wall. Some of them were with friends but most of them were filled with Elizabeth's family. A noise in the living room averted Nathan's attention away from the pictures and to the children.
"Now what sound does a lion make Jack?"
"Roarrrrrrr" Allie loudly answered her own question directed at the boy as she tickled his sides.
The room immediately erupted with the boy's giggles mixed alongside Allie's laughter. The two looked wrapped in their own little happy world.
Elizabeth couldn't help but smile at the sight in front of her. She instinctively looked over at Nathan for his reaction and caught him already looking at her. Her smile fell as she noticed the intensity of his gaze. It took her breath away and made her insides turn to jello. They both longed for this kind of life together. But the feeling made Elizabeth's fear grow stronger inside. The same fear she would feel every time she watched him leave for an assignment out of town. Turning around to the kitchen, Elizabeth took a deep breath out to steady herself. It would be a long night.
Dinner went as smoothly as could be expected. With relief from both adults, Allie kept the conversation going through the meal. Speaking of what her friends thought of certain activities and how excited she was for summer break. Though the latter of the conversation normally would have hurt Elizabeth's feelings, it didn't faze her tonight. She kept watching Nathan in the corner of her eye and wondering how things would be between them now.
After the meal, Elizabeth excused herself to tuck little Jack in bed. Normally she would wait a little later but the young boy had a long uneventful day.
"Did something happen between the two of you that I should know about?" Allie whispered over to her uncle when her teacher disappeared upstairs. She gave him a confused expression as she picked up her plate.
Nathan gave her a "drop it" look in response and picked up his plate to put in the sink.
Ignoring the warning from her uncle, Allie kept pressuring him to speak, "I mean you have barely spoken to each other all night. And you both look like wounded puppies. What did you do?"
"Why do you think I did something?"
Allie stopped picking up the dishes to put one of her hands on her hip, "Because if you didn't do something than you would be asking her what's wrong by now"
Nathan blew out a breath and looked over at his niece. When did she become so observant? As much as he wanted to tell her the truth, Nathan knew it wasn't the time or the place for it, "Just drop it Allie."
"Uncle Nathan"
"I said drop it" Nathan firmly replied to her complaint and continued clearing the table.
"Yes sir" Allie respectfully replied as her shoulders dropped in defeat. She continued to pick up the rest of the glasses and bring them over to the sink.
Elizabeth shortly appeared at the bottom of the stairs and looked between the two with a puzzled expression. "What did I miss?"
"Nothing apparently" Allie said under her breath and turned back around to put the silverware in the sink.
Nathan gave her a stern look before returning his gaze back to Elizabeth,
"Are you ready to discuss the plans you had in mind for Jack?"
"Hmmm sure" Elizabeth looked skeptical of the two but didn't press them for further information, "Let me just get our dessert out" Elizabeth gave a nod of her head as she quickly made her way into the kitchen. She unwrapped the cover over the pie she made earlier in the day and set it on the table. "Thank you both for clearing the table"
"Of course" Nathan replied as he took the same seat he occupied for the meal.
Allie plopped herself down in a seat across from her uncle and replied to Elizabeth's praise, "You're welcome, Mrs. Thornton. Uncle Nathan always says that it's only proper to help clear the table after dinner when eating at someone else's home"
Elizabeth looked away from the young girl to her Uncle, "Well your Uncle is a very smart man"
The two adults held each other's gaze for a moment too long. Allie's voice quickly adverted Elizabeth's attention away from Nathan.
"Are we going to eat the pie on our hands or…."
"Allie" Nathan whispered over at the girl and shook his head with a small smile.
"Oh!" Elizabeth looked down at the pie cutter with a piece of pie on it, "no we aren't. Let me get us some plates"
While the three enjoyed a piece of pie, they discussed plans for Jack's gift. Elizabeth wanted Nathan to build a wooden train set for Jack's third birthday with it painted specifically red. For Jack loved the color red. The young boy wanted everything in red. It seemed fitting to Elizabeth for Little Jack's biological father wore red daily when he was among the living. Though it was a small painful reminder to Elizabeth that Jack sr. was no longer with them.
Elizabeth provided paper and writing utensils for Nathan to sketch a train set for Jack on. Allie was helpful in providing multiple ideas on wooden items and characters to add to the set. Some of those including animals, a schoolteacher, a coal miner, a lumber worker, and especially a Mountie. The three went to work on discussing the design of the train itself and the items included.
Elizabeth was specifically explaining how long the railroad tracks needed to be made when Nathan became alarmed by the smell of smoke.
"Did you leave something on the stove?" Nathan directly asked Elizabeth as he cocked his head back to look at the stove himself.
Elizabeth turned her body around to inspect the kitchen herself with a puzzled expression forming on her face. "No, why do you ask?"
"I smell smoke" Nathan answered her question as he stood up from his chair and walked around the kitchen.
"I smell it too" Allie titled her head to the side as she looked around the house for a sign of a fire.
"Maybe Rosemary and Lee built a camp fire outside to enjoy the night air" Elizabeth thought out loud as she quickly made her way to the back door. She opened it and looked across the yard at her neighbors property. She leaned her head back inside and closed the door. "No sign of any camp fire"
The two Grants looked puzzled at the revelation. Nathan looked upstairs and noticed a little smoke coming from the top. Nathan stiffened as his instincts surged into action.
"Elizabeth get Allie outside right now" Nathan ordered at once as he turned back to Elizabeth.
"Why….." Elizabeth followed his previous line of sight before the situation at hand clicked and sent alarms inside her head. "Nathan… Jack's up there"
Nathan grabbed a hold of her arm quickly as he spoke, "I will get him out. Get Allie and get out right now. Now Elizabeth."
"Nathan…"
Elizabeth felt paralyzed by fear as she watched him fly right upstairs. The fear only lasted a second as her own instincts kicked into action. Smoke from upstairs started spreading faster through the downstairs.
"Allie! Get outside. Now!" Elizabeth ordered as she guided the young girl outside. She instantly turned back around to her home as her eyes focused on the upstairs window to her bedroom. The red hot flames flared inside her bedroom window already as smoke flowed outside from the lower level of the house. She had faith that Nathan would come out with Jack safely in his arms. At least that's what she kept repeating in her head.
The two outside held tight to one another as they waited for Nathan to appear with Jack in his arms.
Minutes later Nathan appeared in the doorway with little Jack bundled in a blanket in his arms. "My sweet boy" Elizabeth reached out for her baby boy as tears of worry fell from her eyes.
Nathan gently handed over the boy into his mother's open arms as he spoke, "He's okay."
Elizabeth held tight to her son and repeatedly checked over his small frame for any injuries. She kept showering him with kisses to erase the tear stains that formed on his face.
Nathan took his gaze off of the reunited pair and looked over at his niece. He instinctively went into Mountie mode. "Allie go over to the Coulters and ask them to call for help"
"Yes sir" Allie immediately replied as she rushed over to her ordered destination.
Elizabeth vaguely heard the ordered command from Nathan to his niece. Her attention was solely on her son in her arms. Movement caused Elizabeth's attention to divert from her son to Nathan who was heading back towards the entrance of her home.
"Nathan. What are you doing?" Elizabeth questioned him as she stepped forward towards him with alarm because he was thinking about going back into the fire.
Nathan quickly turned back around and informed Elizabeth of his plans, "I'm going to try to stop the fire. I'm not letting you lose your home." He held eye contact for only a moment with her before rushing forward back into the burning building.
Elizabeth didn't have any time to react as she watched him disappear into her home. He immediately vanished inside the smoke filled house as the flames slowly spread throughout the foundation. The air in Elizabeth's lungs left her as the realization of Nathan's decision hit her like a ton of bricks.
"Nathan" Elizabeth shouted out with a desperate plea for him as her voice echoed in the air. Tears streamed faster down her face as fear struck straight through to her heart. Nathan went into a burning building. Nathan might not come back out. That realization paralyzed her as she watched her house burn into flames and waited for the person who held her heart to come out.
"Elizabeth!" a voice filled the air as it increased in volume with the voice drawing closer to Elizabeth. Rosemary quickly came into focus rushing forward towards her best friend with Allie and her husband by her side.
"Where's Uncle Nathan?" Allie instantly asked her teacher looking around in alarm.
Elizabeth heard the fear inside the young girl's voice as she turned her head to look at her. Not knowing how to answer the young girl, she switched the direction of her worry filled eyes to Lee. She didn't need to speak the words to communicate what happened. The man silently nodded his head in acknowledgment as he looked over at the burning house. He knew what had to be done. Without another thought, Lee Coulter rushed ahead towards the burning house without hesitation as he covered his mouth with the side of his arm.
"Lee" Elizabeth heard her friend shout after her husband. Rosemary covered her mouth with worry as her husband disappeared into the burning building. Allie let out a cry as she buried her head in the side of Elizabeth's body. The girl was terrified of losing her uncle. Elizabeth couldn't blame her for she felt the same fear for Nathan. She tightly held the young girl to her side.
People immediately started showing up at the scene. Many men followed inside the building with buckets of water and blankets to take out the fire. The commotion created a huge crowd around Elizabeth's house as the community joined together to help one another. The fire itself started to diminish shortly after the arrival of the men.
Elizabeth, Rosemary, and Allie kept their eyes solely focused on the front door as men came out of the once burning house and into the cool night air.
Lee appeared first with a relieved and worried Rosemary rushing forward to greet him. Nathan came behind him as he slowly walked out and coughed repeatedly. His face and clothes were covered in black from the smoke. His balance looked unsteady as he searched around for Elizabeth and Allie.
"Uncle Nathan" Allie shouted spotting her uncle and rushing towards him. Elizabeth hurriedly rushed behind her with little Jack still held tightly in her arms.
Nathan smiled as he heard the familiar voice from the loud crowd and instantly spotted them coming towards him. A cough sprang from him causing him to lose his breathe which caused his vision to blur. Stumbling to one side, he lost the battle of completely staying upright as he tumbled to the ground.
"Nathan" Elizabeth shouted with alarm as she watched him fall to the ground in front of them. Her heart sank. Elizabeth's body surged forward towards him as her knees buckled and fell onto the hard ground. "Nathan?" Elizabeth asked in a panic as she grabbed his hand that laid on the ground.
Barely hanging onto consciousness, Nathan struggled to open his eyes to ease the worry in Elizabeth's panic filled voice. His eye lids felt like lead and the pounding inside his head intensified by the second. With what little adrenaline he had left surging through him, Nathan opened his eyes and looked directly into a pair of hazel colored irises.
"Nathan" Elizabeth softly whispers as she catches his pained blue orbs staring up at her. Tears proceeded to fall down the sides of her face as she watches him struggle to remain conscious and with her. A tight pressure on her hand and the worry in his eyes communicates to Elizabeth of the unspoken question being asked. Searching his eyes, Elizabeth releases his hand and repositions it to the side of his blacken face. She instantly understands what he is asking her. "We're okay. Everyone's safe"
Barely nodding his head, Nathan lets out a shaky breath of relief and closes his eyes, finally giving into unconsciousness.
"Uncle Nathan" Elizabeth heard Allie's panicked voice as she watched him give into unconsciousness. Time stood still for Elizabeth in what occurred afterwards. People rushed forward immediately wanting to help the fallen Mountie. Elizabeth and Allie stayed among the people in the crowd to remain closer to him. The two never left Nathan's side the whole time as men carried him to be transported to the infirmary. Elizabeth vaguely remembered when Rosemary took Jack from her arms before continuing to follow along side Nathan.
The trip to the infirmary was a blur for Elizabeth. The only thing Elizabeth registered clearly was Nathan's hand grasped between hers. Time seemed to go by slowly after Nathan arrived at the infirmary. Reluctantly, Elizabeth and Allie were ushered outside to wait as the physicians worked on Nathan.
After a time Carson came outside and took Elizabeth aside to inform her of Nathan's condition. The doctor started off with saying how Nathan would be okay. Then drove in with explaining Nathan's injuries which included a concession from hitting his head in the fire and smoke inhalation in his lungs. Carson's explanation ended with stating how the next couple of hours were vital for Nathan's health and recovery.
Elizabeth took in all the information given to her with a nod of her head before asking permission to see him.
Which is how Elizabeth ended up sitting on the side of the bed beside a unconscious Nathan. Elizabeth held tightly to Nathan's hand as she put their conjoined hands to the side of her face. Tears fell slowly down the sides of her cheeks as she kept her focus on Nathan's breathing. She kept reminding herself that Carson said he would be okay.
Allie sat at the opposite side of the infirmary bed with her uncle's hand in hers. She kept her eyes solely on the most important person in her life. Her Uncle. Who was more like a father to her than a uncle. The moment she saw her uncle fall, her world came crippling down before her and a fear like no other pierced her heart. The young girl took a deep breath out before closing her eyes to pray.
After a short but genuine prayer, Allie looked up and observed the second most important person in her life. Her teacher. For the first time in her life, she didn't feel like it was only just her and her uncle who cared about each other's safety. Now it was someone else who cared about both of them just as much.
"You love him don't you?"
Elizabeth felt her body stiffen with the question being voiced before relaxing at who was asking it. She slowly kissed Nathan's knuckles before barely leaning back to speak.
"I do. I think I have for some time now" Elizabeth whispers back not taking her eyes off of Nathan. She rubbed her thumb in circles over the back of his hand.
"Then why haven't you told him?" Allie continues to observe her teacher's movements and listens intently on her next words.
"It's not as simple as that…" Elizabeth takes a deep breath and struggles to regain control of her emotions. "I guess if I'm truly being honest with myself I've been fighting against loving another Mountie"
Allie absorbed what Elizabeth was saying as she remained silent. Allie noticed how hard this whole situation was for her teacher and felt torn herself. If the young girl was honest with herself, she felt relieved and heartbroken over the revelation from her teacher. Relieved because she finally found someone who cared about her uncle as much as she did. But she also felt heartbroken. Heartbroken over her teacher's fear of loving another man with a dangerous profession.
"That pain of losing….losing someone so close to your heart…" Elizabeth closed her eyes as tears trailed down her cheeks. "I don't think I can survive that kind of pain again"
Tears filled Allie's eyes as she watched her teacher's pain and fear be vocalized. With a soft spoken voice, the young girl vocalized her own question, "but wouldn't it hurt worse to lose him without getting the opportunity to love him?"
Elizabeth remained silent as the young girl's words washed over her. Her inner thoughts immediately started racing over the statement as she kept watching Nathan's chest rise and fall. Elizabeth thought of the two things she has been trying to convince herself of. The first is that the only way she could lose Nathan is from the Mounties taking him away from her. The accident that occurred hours before opened her eyes to the reality of how wrong she was. Because no matter what profession Nathan had, she could still have the potential to lose him from life's day to day events. Life is precious and every day isn't guaranteed. But the deeper realization is that Nathan is a brave, selfless, and impeccable man, who always puts others needs before himself. Even if that means putting his life on the line for someone else. He would always be willing to make that kind of sacrifice even if he wasn't a Mountie.
The second is that distancing herself from Nathan would be the best way to lessen the pain of losing him. But the truth is that she would still love him even from a distance. Whether she would be in a relationship with him or not. And that the pain of losing him wouldn't lessen because of the distance between them. If anything, the pain would become even more unbearable because of the future she would rob them of.
"I don't know if I'm strong enough" Elizabeth barely speaks above a whisper. Turning her head to the young girl's eyes, she lets yet another set of tears fill her eyes.
Allie returned her teacher's pained filled gaze before switching it back to watching her uncle. Allie didn't know if her teacher had the strength to endure another relationship with a Mountie but she knew someone who had the power to give her some.
"Uncle Nathan always says that when we don't have enough strength, we should remember to lean on the only one who does" Allie relays her uncle's previous words to her teacher. Laying her palm in the air, the girl reaches over offering her hand. Her teacher only hesitates for a moment before enclosing her hand in Allie's.
Allie bows her head and waits for her teacher to follow before beginning. Taking a deep breath, Allie began to pray.
"Dear Lord. Guide us and give each one of us strength…."
Elizabeth held tight to Nathan's hand as she kept her gaze on his face. She switched her gaze over at Allie on the cot beside Nathan's bed. Bill came in after a while and somehow convinced the stubborn young girl to eat, and eventually to rest on the cot beside her uncle's bed. Now the young girl was passed out from exhaustion.
Observing the young girl sleep, Elizabeth thought back to the girl's belief in the power of prayer. Nathan was raising the young girl well, tonight alone proved that. The young girl had been a blessing over these few years to Elizabeth but especially over these last few hours.
Taking a deep breath, she wipes a tear off her cheek with her hand. Turning her gaze towards Nathan's face once more.
"Do you remember when you came riding up to Jack and I by the pond?" Elizabeth whispered the question out loud. "You asked me what was in my heart?"
Elizabeth reached out with her free hand and put a hand on his cheek. After a moment, she leaned back and returned both her hands to holding tightly to his.
"Ever since Jack died….I have felt like a piece of my heart was missing. That my heart would never be able to heal from the pain of losing him." She gently landed a kiss on his knuckles before leaning back with a small smile. "But then you walked into my life and changed everything. Your kindness, selflessness, and protectiveness have slowly began to mend the broken pieces of my heart….and you have woven your way into my heart" With tears filling in her eyes once again, Elizabeth placed her hand over Nathan's heart. "Im afraid of losing you, but I'm even more afraid of losing you and not getting to love you. And I do love you"
Nathan gently placed his free hand over Elizabeth's that laid on his chest. A moment passed before his eyelids slowly opened revealing his blue orbs which immediately searched for one specific set of hazel eyes.
"I love you too"
Without waiting a moment more Elizabeth leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she put one hand to the side of his face. A touch to the side of her face indicated Nathan's hand found it's place on her cheek.
Leaning back, Elizabeth looked into his bright blue eyes with a smile.
"Nathan"
"Elizabeth" Nathan breathlessly replied with a wide smile as his thumb wiped away a tear falling from her cheek.
And in that moment Elizabeth was no longer running from their love. Instead she was finally embracing it. And for the first time since Jack's passing, she finally could see a future worth holding onto.