BPOV
I've come to the conclusion that Edward is an old-school gentleman.
When he picked me up for our date, he came with an assortment of dahlias in hand, he shook Charlie's hand and was respectful as dad tried to interrogate him. Another thing he did a lot of was holding doors open for me, it wasn't just the car door either, it was all doors the whole evening.
I also learned a lot more since the date started.
Edward wasn't a hand holder but liked to wrap his arm around me as we walked, he had the perfect nook that I fit right into.
He had this sweet smile he'd give me from time to time. It was crooked and didn't show much teeth, but something about it was endearing.
He was most definitely a leg guy, because he kept eyeing mine. I wanted him to ogle a bit, because I wore my shortest navy skater dress.
He was also a food sharer, so far we had only had appetizers, but he offered me a bite of his spinach and artichoke dip more than once.
"Are you a dreamer?" he asks, leaning forward a bit, his forearms resting on the table, the sleeves of his cream thermal are pushed up.
I grin.
"I have a tendency to get lost in thought, I don't know if I'd say I'm dreaming," I tease, taking my straw between my lips for a pull of my water.
"What kind of thoughts," he asks seemingly interested.
"I'm observant— a people watcher," I say thoughtfully. "It's a recent thing I've started doing. I think maybe I was ignorant to the people around me before, but now I'm constantly aware."
I see the flash of understanding in his eyes.
"Being observant is a good thing," he says.
"I suppose it is, I've been thinking I want to be a therapist," I tell him, leaning back in my seat. "Last year I was focused on English Lit programs but I think psychology might be my destiny."
"I wish even now that I knew my destiny," he says with a tinge of bitterness.
"You're only taking a year off right?"
"Yeah, I got into UDub's law school," he says.
"To study Environmental law," I add.
He nods in confirmation.
"See, you are now on the path to your destiny," I tell him knowingly.
"Do you know where you're going?"
"I got early acceptance to UDub over the summer,"
"Was it your first choice?"
I shake my head thinking of my answer.
"I got into Penn and NYU but changed my mind about going that far. I like the idea of staying close to my dad, three hours seems like an okay distance to spread my wings and if I need him he's still close," I explain.
I made the decision after rehab, when I was nervous for myself, when I thought I might be like my mother after all. I've reflected on this a lot lately and I know I was masking when I started binging. I'm not sure what Renee's relationship with alcohol was, but I knew my reasons were different.
"So we'll be on the same campus," Edward grins.
I nod with my grin growing.
The waitress comes with our entrees, Edward steals a couple of bites of my mushroom ravioli.
"What if I didn't want to share my food?" I ask taking a twirl of his linguini.
"Hey, you're stealing bites of mine too, so an eye for an eye and all that jazz," he teases.
I roll my eyes, chewing my food.
He laughs because he assumes he's funny.
I'm mid-stab of my ravioli when I see Jess at the hostess stand. She wasn't here when we arrived and looks like she works here. She didn't have a job last year, so maybe her parents made her get one.
She must feel my eyes on her because she looks up surprised, her reaction of course is fleeting before she turns away.
"Do you miss your friends from Chicago?" I ask Edward once I'm finished chewing.
"In a way, but most of the guys I grew up with were driven by networking, which is more important than friendship. Friendships are secondary to the bigger picture for them," he explains. "To be honest, my relationship with Emmett is really what I think normal friendship is."
My eyes have widened and he laughs.
"I had like two close friends in Chicago, Garrett, and Marcus. They were like younger versions of my father. I am not, if that makes sense."
"So no White Sox games?"
"Those were activities I did with my mom," he says as his smile softens. "In a lot of ways my mom was both mom and dad to me."
"I get it, that's how my dad is too, except raising a girl has made him go awkward where it counts," I say with a laugh remembering when I got my first period and dad's reaction to that. He fumbled his way through an abridged bird and bees talk.
"I wish my mom was like that, but she was comfortable with all the adolescent milestones, almost unshakeable," he snorts.
"You mean with puberty and sex talks?" I ask curiously.
"Yeah," he laughs. "my dad was physically present but not really. His work always came first, that is part of the reason they got divorced, well that and he had a lot of extracurriculars going on at work."
"Does your mom still see your dad?"
"Unfortunately," he says, giving me a rueful smile. "He works for my Gramps so she sees him at functions and because of me, family events, but since I turned eighteen I've tried to not subject her to him."
I nod.
Luckily Renee signed her rights over to Charlie, so neither of us have to deal with her. There was one time when I was five that she tried to reach out but that's all she attempted to do as far as communicating with me.
"Are you liking Forks?"
"I am, it's a different atmosphere for sure, but I think I needed this kind of pace. Everything in Chicago was becoming more or less— fucked," he says with a frustrated laugh.
"That's how I feel about going to college, I need to get away," I explain.
He nods, I can see the empathy written all over his face.
I don't know why I ask the next thing that I do, but I do, and there is no turning back. "You were engaged?"
"I was," he says, taking a quick sip of his beer.
"Must have been pretty serious," I say.
"I thought we were, until I caught her cheating on me," he says. I watch him run his hand through his hair, a habit I've noticed he only does when frustrated. "We were together throughout college but knew each other even longer. It was hard, because we shared our lives for two years, with living together and all that—"
He has trailed off and I feel the bitterness rolling off him.
I almost question if he's ready to start dating but he takes my hand in his. His stare is sweet and sincere.
"I probably sound like some jaded asshole, but I promise you I'm not," he starts giving my hand a squeeze. "I wanted to be, like when I got here, I tried to have casual sex, but it turned out that I couldn't be that guy. Even with Jane persistently seeking me out, that isn't entirely on her as much as it was on me."
"Is that why you're so old school with me?"
"Old school?" he snorts with disbelief. "If by old school you mean respectful, then yes that's why I'm so old school with you. You are gorgeous, but you are also a great person."
"Right, my snarkiness makes me such a sweetheart," I comment dryly.
He flashes me that crooked grin. "It really does," he says.
"What was your ex like?"
"Smart, too smart— one might liken her to a Stepford Wife but that's where her intelligence shines, people underestimate her when they shouldn't."
"Did you underestimate her?"
"I thought I knew her and that was my mistake."
"So you don't trust easily now?"
"I trust, I just know now the kind of people not to trust."
"How can you be so open when someone you thought was your forever cheated on you?"
"Because sometimes Bella, you need to believe the good in people. I need to know that just because I thought she was the one, doesn't mean that she was," he rationalized.
I wished that I could see people for what they were like Edward does. To a point, I know that most people aren't shitty, but the truth was some people really were though. I needed to get better at figuring out the difference.
The heavy past lives conversation breaks once we have dessert. We split a slice of tiramisu, which Edward playfully forks into my upper lip.
"You got something there," he laughs, brushing at his own lip.
I roll my eyes licking off the mess he created.
Another thing about Edward that gave him points is he was an excellent tipper. I caught the bill and what he wrote down for the tip before he turned the receipt over and helped me into my coat.
He even gives my nose a quick peck as he straightens out my collar.
His SUV is parked down the street. We walk in casual conversation with his arm wrapped loosely around me. Once we are near the bookstore next to the parking lot I hear loud arguing, curious I turn my head to seek out the people in a heated conversation.
I see Jazz's hair first, thrown up in a man bun, he's at the side of the building with— Alice. She's grabbing for his hands, clearly crying.
I'm a little thrown and Edward has caught on to what holds my attention since I've stopped walking.
At first, I'm confused as I watch the familiarity pass between them. Jazz is trying to keep his space from her, but it is Alice that surprises me with the way she's trying to touch him like they have or have had an intimate relationship.
When Jazz throws his hands up yelling louder, Edward nudges me. "I think we should head to the car," he says gently.
I nod.
For some reason, I feel betrayed, because to my knowledge he had never spoken to Alice before and vice versa. Alice was never one to share her exploits either, but surely if they were seeing each other when we were friends she would have said something.
"Want to talk about it?" Edward asks once we're in the SUV.
"I'm not even sure what there is to talk about," I sigh because it is true.
"Maybe you should start with talking to Jazz," he offers.
I nod.
"You're right, there has to be a reason he was talking to her," I say, not entirely convinced.
"Now let's get you home before your dad decides to never let me take you out again," he says.
I laugh but he's right, if I'm even a minute late Charlie might take it as a sign of disrespect. The flutter in my stomach helps me realize that Edward might just be one of a kind. The kind of someone I need in my life.