One more thing, remember to vote in the poll... just a couple more chapter until it closes
Chapter 7: Kiss of Marriage
Everyone stared at Luffy… they couldn't believe it… of all things that happened… this happened…
"YOU ATE ALMOST ALL THE FOOD!" yelled Nami.
Luffy only laughed a tiny bit, "Yeah…" he said.
"Is there any other island on the way to the Grand Line?" asked Usopp.
"There is one… but all I have heard is rumors." Said Tashegi.
"What sort of rumors?" asked Mari.
"It is said due to it's close proximity to the Grand Line that this island embodies the anything can happen sprit of the Grand Line. On this islands there is a place that if you go there you'll end up having some sort of curse." Said Tashegi, "Not only that but the only village on the island is a village of Amazons that have very little contact with the outside world… in fact they don't even use our language there… I don't know if the rumors are true or not…"
"They're true." Interrupted Kuina.
Tashegi and Zoro sweat dropped while Luffy had that look again.
"What's wrong?" asked Sanji.
"Nothing…" said Zoro and Tashegi, Luffy was about to say something but was blocked by Kuina… making everyone sweat drop as Luffy fumbled with his words.
"So are we going… I mean it's only rumors." Said Nami.
"Of course!" said Luffy, "One last hurray before we reach the Grand Line! Let's go to this island!"
Nami laid out a map and Tashegi pointed to the island, within a few hours they landed there.
"Okay! You guys go on! I'm going to watch the ship!" said Usopp shaking.
"Are you sure, those amazons might go after you." Said Nami.
"I'm fine!" said Usopp, "It's just that my I-can't-go-on-that-island disease is acting up again."
This made everyone sweat drop, and so the group headed to the island.
"So, who going to lead?" asked Nami.
"I will!" yelled Luffy.
"No you're not!" yelled Nami, "We need someone who will remember the way!"
"I'll do it." Volunteered Tashegi with Kuina nodded in agreement, meaning that Kuina was really leading them.
"So the reason you're leading us is that we won't go to this cursed training ground, right?" whispered Tashegi.
"Yeah, I can't way what will happen… but all I can say is Luffy can't know what goes on there." Said Kuina.
Luffy fortunately didn't hear that last part.
"So Butterfly?" asked Nami, "What are you going to now with Tashegi in the picture."
"Well I'm going to push myself! So that Zoro will notice me! And hopefully we'll be together." Said Mari.
Nami sighed, "Really what do you see in him?" asked Nami.
Mari just blushed… not saying anything.
That's when they arrived at the village gate… they entered the village and saw everyone began to stare that them.
"Why are they staring at us?" asked Sanji.
"We don't get many outsiders here!" said a voice.
They turned to see an old woman… well it looked like an old woman, she was very small, shivered and stood on a cane.
"It's a Monkey Mummy!" yelled Luffy.
The woman whacked Luffy in the head.
"I am one of the elders of this village, Lotion." Said the old woman apparently named… Lotion.
"Is that really you're name?" asked Nami with a sweat drop.
Lotion laughed, "Our name in you're language have a tendency to be health and beauty aids in you're language." Said Lotion she then got serious and turned to the three visible girls in the crew, "You three girls better be careful. If you value your lives then you will not accept any challenge from anyone"
"What about the guys?" asked Luffy.
Lotion laughed… well it was more of a girlish giggle, "I'll just let you find out on your own." She said, "So what brings you outsiders here anyways?"
"You see our ship is almost out of food. And we need to get some more before we head off to the Grand Line." Said Nami.
"But first I have a question to ask you." Said Lotion.
(Oh no! My bucket of water!) cried a young girl that was a carrying the bucket of water that flew out her hand.
The bucket of water splashed an area that was nowhere near the crew…
"Never mind, that answers my question." Said Lotion.
"What was that about?" asked Nami.
The other shrugged while Kuina just sweat dropped.
And so they broke off into two groups one went with Lotion to get food (which was Nami and Sanji) while the other went to the explore which was Zoro, Luffy, Tashegi, Mari and Kuina.
"This place is so interesting!" said Luffy as he watch various women spar with each other.
Nearby two girls were sparing, one of them had light blue hair that was put into two buns with braids coming out of them while the other had Lavender hair with two buns on each side of her hair and two long pony tails coming from them, the blue haired girl was using twin battle fans while the lavender haired girl used a sword.
(Look Pantene, outsiders!) said the blue haired girl.
The lavender haired girl named Pantene looked at them, her eyes went wide.
(Pantene what is it?) asked the blue harried girl.
(I found good outsider to fight.) said Pantene.
Pantene ran to the Straw Hats.
"I challenge you to a fight!" said Pantene pointing at Zoro.
"What, me?" asked Zoro.
"No I'm talking to invisible angel next to you." Said Pantene sarcastically
"What? Really?" asked Luffy.
"Um… Luffy… she was being sarcastic." Said Mari with a sweat drop.
"Why not." Said Zoro.
"What!" yelled Kuina.
"Let's fight." Said Zoro with a smirk.
"This is going to end badly…" sighed Kuina who began to message a headache.
Zoro and Pantene met in a circle where various town's people went to watch, whispering about it.
"Why would that girl just come out and challenge him like that?" asked Tashegi.
Before Kuina could answer the blue haired girl came up and said "She like him."
"What?" asked Mari.
"She like, Pantene never fight outsider, she must have crush him." Said the girl.
This sentence made everyone sweat drop.
"Fructis no talk outsider language good… Pantene really smart and know how to speak it perfectly." Said the girl.
"So who are you?" asked Luffy.
"Me Fructis, Pantene twin sister." Said the girl named Fructis.
"So I'm guessing the girl who challenged Zoro is Pantene, right?" asked Mari.
Fructis nodded with a smile on her face.
"The match is starting!" said Luffy.
Pantene ran towards Zoro who had drawn all three swords.
"You're pretty good." Said Zoro.
"I'm best with the sword in the village." Said Pantene with a smirk.
"But you're not better than me!" said Zoro who tossed her aside like it was nothing, Pantene fell to the ground and was quickly knocked out.
"Zoro won!" cheered Luffy.
"That good!" said Fructis.
"But your sister lost." Said Mari.
"This is bad… really bad…" sighed Kuina.
Both Luffy and Tashegi looked at Kuina.
Zoro walked over to Pantene, "Hey are you okay?" he asked.
Pantene woke and rubbed her sword head, she stared at him.
"I'm sorry…" said Zoro.
That's when she glomped Zoro and kissed him on the lips causing all the Straw Hats to gape at the site and Zoro's eyes to go wide.
"No… not another girl…" cried Mari.
Not too far away Nami was carrying over a bag large bag of food and dragging Sanji along, Sanji was pretty beaten up and unconscious.
"Sanji sure was popular with the ladies…" laughed Lotion.
"They all beat him up!" yelled Nami.
"I know… with the exception of one man from my youth, if a girl tries to fight an outsider male usually that means they like them." Said Lotion.
"What do you mean?" said Nami.
(I can't believe Pantene lost to that green haired outsider!" said someone in the crowd.
"Well looks like you're going to see for yourself." Said Lotion.
With Zoro he broke the kiss and yelled out.
"Why did you do that!" yelled Zoro.
"Please don't struggle… husband." Said Pantene.
"Husband!" yelled Zoro.
(Oh he's taken!) said a random Amazon.
(It's a shame… if Pantene won, I would have challenged him.) said another.
Kuina sighed… it looked like a lot more Amazons were caught under the spell as well… thank god for that first come first serve thing.
"Get away from me!" yelled Zoro trying to get her away.
Nami still dragging Sanji saw the others.
"What's going on!" she yelled.
"I don't know…" said Luffy.
"Oh Zoro…" cried Mari who then preceded to go into the fetal position.
"Pantene!" called out Lotion, "Bring your husband to my house!"
"Yes elder Lotion!" said Pantene, "Come on!"
"Get off me!" yelled Zoro.
"You should come too!" said Lotion, "You should learn the laws of the village."
"Okay." Said Luffy nodding.
Later on they were all in her hut, which was nicely decorated, all of the Straw Hats that had come to the island along with Pantene and Fructis were there… Sanji was once again conscious and steaming in anger at both the fact that Zoro fought a girl and said girl was now stuck on him like glue.
"So I should explain the laws." Said Lotion, "You see our village out a warrior clan… especially our woman the law concerning outsiders is when ever a woman defeat one of our warriors, she must give the outsider the kiss of death, a promise to hunt the outsider to the ends of the earth and kill her… however if a man were to defeat one."
"What is it?" asked Luffy.
"She must give the outside the kiss of marriage and marry him." Said Lotion.
"What!" yelled all the Straw Hats.
"That's right!" said Pantene, "I'm so glad everything's' okay! It's not like the Ranma incident!"
"The Ranma incident?" asked Nami.
"It's a long story involving another elder's Granddaughter." Said Lotion, "Anyways I'm amusing the captain will let her join you're crew of pirates."
"Wait how did you know we're pirates?" asked Sanji.
"Everyone who comes to this island are either pirates or martial artists… the World Government knows a lot about this island and wants to leave it alone as much it can…" said Lotion.
"Of course she can join!" said Luffy wit ha big smile.
"What!" yelled Zoro.
"Yay!" cheered Pantene hugging Zoro even more.
"No…" cried Mari.
"Great…" sighed Tashegi.
"Why does Zoro get all the girls?" cried Sanji.
"If memory serves… you're the one that wouldn't fight back." Said Nami with a sweat drop.
Sometime later the crew was sitting by the gates waiting for the newest member.
"So Butterfly…" said Nami.
"No! I will Zoro's heart! I will no matter what it will take!" yelled Butterfly pointing to the sun set.
"Okay…" said Nami with a sweat drop.
Zoro sighed at he watched Pantene say goodbye to her sister and several other girls.
"You know you got off lucky." Said Kuina.
"What do you mean?" asked Zoro staring at Kuina.
Kuina took out a strange clear sheet and placed it front of Zoro.
"Amazon language." Said Kuina.
That's when words appeared on the sheet Zoro sweat drop.
"What is this?" asked Zoro.
"Subtitles." Said Kuina.
Zoro sweat dropped eve more when he read them.
[You're so lucky Pantene, you got to him first
[He'd make an excellent husband
[Why couldn't I challenge him before you
Kuina took a away the subtle sheet and said "You're lucky that there's a first come first serve policy… otherwise you'll have a big harem of Amazons after you."
"Great…" said Zoro who sighed, "At least one is better than a bunch of them… right?"
"I should warn you the amazons are notorious for being clingy." Said Kuina.
Which made him anime fall.
"What wrong Zoro?" asked Mari.
"It's nothing…" said Zoro.
And so the crew left the village, with Lotion and Fructis watching them.
(Fructis, what do you know about Ranma?) asked Lotion.
(Not much… just that he beat sister Shampoo while under the Jusenkyo curse of being a woman.)
Lotion chuckled (there's more the Ranma incident than you know about… and I have a feeling that Zoro will have his hands full on that one)
Fructis blinked that the elder not knowing what she meant.
Back at the Going Merry… or Merry Go… the ship… Usopp was working on some bullets with the chemicals Mari gave him when.
"Hey did anything happen?" asked Luffy.
"No much… you?" asked Usopp.
"Zoro has a fiancé." Said Luffy.
"What!" yelled Usopp.
That's when he saw Pantene still clutching Zoro as if her life depended on it.
"Get off me Pantene! Please!" yelled Zoro.
"But you're my fiancé…" said Pantene.
"We're not getting married!" yelled Zoro.
"I should gone…" said Usopp with a sweat drop.
After setting sail (which was hard as Luffy wanted to investigate the curse of the island, which everyone else was against), Pantene managed to let go of Zoro and needed to talk to the two girls that seemed the closest to Zoro.
"You two… seem close to Zoro." Said Pantene, "Now let me warn you… first off… usually if a girl gets to close to our husbands or fiancés it's the law to kill them." Said Pantene.
Tashegi's eyes went wide while Mari cried out "What!"
"Normally… however now that we're on the same pirate crew… I won't be doing that… after all… it's a horrible crime to kill one's crewmates… however… if one of you challenges me to fight Zoro then I will take the challenge and should you win… then I'll be forced to kill you." Said Pantene.
"I'm in love with Zoro… I'm just watching over him for certain reasons." Said Tashegi.
"I promise I won't fight you! I lack any upper body strength… and I'm just and archer!" said Mari.
"Fine then..." said Pantene walking away.
"Thank god…" sighed Mari.
"I'm going to have to talk to Kuina and Zoro about this…" thought Tashegi.
Sometime later, she did just that.
"Great…" sighed Zoro rubbing his head.
"Well maybe, even though this won't happen for a while… but maybe when I gain my next reveal she'll be one of the ones that I reveal my self to and tell her about the spell." Said Kuina.
That's when suddenly a scroll appeared in Kuina's hands… she opened it and sweat dropped.
"What is it?" asked Zoro.
"It says: randomness factor has been added to Roronoa Zoro's case. Should someone try and tell a one of the effected about the spell, the Randomness Factor will take effect." Said Kuina.
"Randomness factor?" asked Tashegi.
"What's that?" asked Zoro.
"It's hard to explain… but someone go tell Mari or Pantene." Said Kuina.
Zoro walked over to Mari who was busy making one of her arrows…
"Mari there's something we need to talk about." Said Zoro.
Mari looked up and began to blush "What about?" she asked
Well you see…" said Zoro.
Before Zoro could explain a strange green thing landed on the deck.
"Finally! I got away from those kids." Said the thing which was a short man dressed in green… that looked to be a Leprechaun.
"Is that a Leprechaun?" asked Tashegi.
"Did someone say leprechaun!" yelled Nami coming to the deck.
"Yes… a random factor is when something completely random happens… it's rarely ever the same but it's will always be something to quickly change the subject." Said Kuina.
"I see…" said Tashegi, "You're going to tell Zoro later… right?"
"I know… I will." Said Kuina.
So Zoro gained another lover, and at the same time something prevented all girls from find out about it… And so the crew headed towards the Grand Line… while Nami chases the Leprechaun around the deck to get his gold… too bad all that Leprechaun has is cereal… god I hate that a Leprechaun…
Next Time: The crew is close to the Grand Line... but of course stuff happens... what sort of stuff... find out next time!A/N: Oh about the thing with the Leprechaun, that's a reference to They're After me Lucky Charms, it's a crack fic I wrote two years ago... two years ago today in fact. I needed something random then I remembered to today is St. Patrick's Day... so I decided why don't I make a reference to They're After me Lucky Charms when I introduce the randomness factor by the way, if you enjoy crack fics, hate Lucky Charms or Lucky the Leprechaun or just want to read a story involving leprechauns that's the story for you... which will be a reoccurring joke in this fanfic... oh and by the way... I will use the one from What If... yes it's gross... but it's a great joke...
