Pyrrha used to think lying came naturally to her. It was part of her job, after all: a confident grin whenever she had to face dozens of flashing cameras no matter how uncomfortable they became. A cocky, winning smile whenever she filmed a commercial for Pumpkin Pete's or whatever bland, fake health food brand wished to sponsor her. All of it was necessary for her to continue competing, after all. These smiles, these little lies were just part of the package that came with the celebrity she'd gained along with her championship trophies.
But when it came to people she loved? A pure soul like Jaune, with his bright, beautiful aura, ripe with potential, who was only ever wonderful, sweet and kind to her for no other motivation other than because that was who he was? It was impossible. You couldn't practice something like that, not if you wanted people to trust and want to stay close to you, the kind of closeness she'd yearned for years, with people that weren't family.
So today would mark her first great failure. Because what doesn't come with being a world renowned fighting champion and celebrity is the ability lie to people you love.
Pyrrha was a winner. Thus, she'd never been trained to lose. So even the worst Grimm could not compete with what terrified her now.
"Something about that moment felt...wrong," Jaune spat out the last word with an uncomfortable grimace, his eyes cast downward. "Like I wasn't using my own strength to help me win." He looked up and glared, accusing. Yet there was pain obvious in his eyes as voice as he asked, "So...did you?"
He might as well have been a different person from the way he looked at her, his kind cerulean eyes hardened into an accusatory glare with a hint of anger. Pyrrha felt as if his gaze could render her transparent, and it extinguished any drop of desire she had left to follow through with her lie. She was as exposed as a deer caught in headlights, and she was dangerously close to getting rammed.
No, of course it was all you, she wanted to say. More like a plea. That's how amazing you've become. Of course it was all you. In her head she repeated it to herself like a mantra, as if it was an any less futile attempt to believe in her own lie.
Jaune had become quite amazing, that she couldn't lie about. Even though only less a month had passed since she'd begun tutoring him privately, those rooftop sessions had blossomed results that were much more than she'd expected of him. Even on the days he didn't always see the product of his efforts himself, she always looked at him with pride in her heart. He was always amazing, in her eyes.
Which was why she couldn't possibly tell him what he wished to hear. Not when she was certain she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she did. And so, there was only ever really one path laid out in front of her.
"Jaune," she began, voice cracking from the words she found tough to chew on. "It was a matter of life and death. I had to do whatever I could to make sure you were safe. You haven't unlocked your aura yet. What if you haven't managed to beat it in time?"
"That's not what I'm upset about." Jaune clenched his fists. His eyes scrunched, water forming from his eyelids and spilling down his cheeks. "How do I know you haven't used it during our training sessions?"
Pyrrha bit her lip, trying hard not to let the crescendo of tears in her own eyes let loose. During their first few practices together, Pyrrha did on occasion use her semblance. Only so Jaune could get a few successful blocks whenever he wasn't doing so well. It was too tempting not to. Whenever he did, he's eyes would light up, his mouth widening into a grin that would always brighten her spirits. To her, that didn't take away from his very real improvement, but could she believe that he would agree?
Her stomach sank, a sign, a warning she recognized as that of danger knocking. The danger of losing a friend she valued so much. Those were the consequences of wishing to shield him from his own feelings of self doubt. Her efforts to make him happy with himself could backfire now, and result in even more crushing self loathing and doubt, as well as an additional wound: mistrust of anyone who'd ever wish to help him from here on out. The memory of her, of Beacon as a whole, possibly, would only result in a scar on an already damaged heart. But she knew that could still happen if she kept on lying to him.
"I did, though only for less than a handful of times when we first started out," she explained, and she did so knowing she was now treading on tumultuous waters. "But that was so you could build the muscle memory necessary to know what it felt like to get it right! Jaune," she said, voice soft, a bit of a plea. "You know I would do anything to help you become the best you can be. Why would you expect me to do anything against that? And even if I had to help you a little bit, that doesn't mean you haven't been learning and growing. Plus, it's not easy to tell how much you've improved when you're just starting. And that's normal. You're not weak for feeling that way either."
"I'm just..." Jaune sniffed. He wiped his eyes and continued to stare at the floor, on his feet. "I'm wondering if it wasn't enough. If you weren't enough to help me. And if you aren't enough to help me, then...what if no one is?"
"Everyone makes progress at their own pace," Pyrrha assured. "You being slower than everyone else doesn't make you any less capable of being a great huntsman. Being able to fight well is important, but your heart is what truly counts. And you have one of the biggest hearts I know."
For a while, Jaune remained silent, eyes glued downward. He bit his lower lip, lost in thought. What was he feeling? Pyrrha wondered. Contemplation? Denial? Anger at her lies? Were her words enough to dissuade him from giving up entirely? An agonizing moment in which Pyrrha started gnawing on her own lip.
"You're right," Jaune finally said, and his sullen expression morphed into a small smile. "I'm sorry, Pyrrha. I know you just wanted the best for me."
Pyrrha sighed, elated. But Jaune's eyes hardened, and the lingering frown he had dampened her spirits again.
"But..." he trailed off with a sigh. "I can't have you holding my hand anymore. That's not going to let me truly grow. And there's...I think I'm going to be mad at you for a little while. So I think...for now at least, we should stop with the nightly lessons. Keep our distance unless it comes to team stuff."
Pyrrha nodded. She swallowed the lump that had begun to form in her throat and rubbed her stinging eyes. However much time you need, she promised to herself. I deserve this. A thought which she decided to keep hidden, because how could she even consider making it about her at all?
"But I will say," Jaune continued. "As exhausting as it can get, Yang's training is definitely going to help. It's not that bad, really. Besides, I like knowing how much effort I've been putting in by how many shirts I go through in a session."
"Many?"
Jaune grinned and pointed to his chest. "This is just a spare shirt she let me borrow. One of two I got drenched in sweat, actually. Pretty gross, right?"
Gods, Yang, Pyrrha thought, wrinkling her nose. You really want to put Jaune through the wringer, don't you? Though she admittedly was impressed that Yang had been considerate. But that didn't mean that there was nothing to fear. Pyrrha promised to herself: If Yang ever stepped out of line, if she ever ended up pushing Jaune too far, even if Jaune himself allowed it, Pyrrha would have a very, personal word with her, the blonde beauty's fiery temper and strength be damned. She had no fear of the girl's Semblance or Ember Celica. She wasn't a champion fighter for nothing.
But for now, she would let it go. After all, wasn't this what she dreamed of? To eventually see Jaune finally realize his potential, swell with confidence, and maybe even rival her in combat? To live up to the legacy of the grandfather whose weapons he bore?
So she just smiled back and promised, "Okay."
Blake could never forget the day she'd gotten her period.
She had been twelve. It had arrived at dusk, on an otherwise unordinary cool spring day, and it had arrived when she otherwise would have been catching fireflies in the woods surrounding her home without a care in the world. She remembered the panic, the frenzied mix of confusion, fear and pain that had overwhelmed her when she felt something cold drip down her leg and the panic when she recognized its color.
Yet despite how traumatic and shocking such an event would usually play out, it was actually one of the fonder memories she had of her childhood on Menagerie, one that wasn't tainted with the fears that came with being part of a revolution. Because after the initial screaming, crying, the constant insistence that she wasn't going to die, her mother sat her down for a talk.
"Every time you put on your makeup or hustle your blades," her mother had hushed as she wiped a towel soaked in warm water around her inner thighs, "—Remember that you're putting on armor from those who could take advantage of the fact that you are a child no longer. Though they may shower you with kind eyes and honeyed words, a creature they can be masking with those things as well. As you come of age, into power, you must make sure that power remains your own."
She kept that warning to heart, like a charm that could ward off any feelings of doubt or moments of indecision. Even Adam hadn't changed that for her, when they'd first met at least. She'd tried her best to keep herself distance emotionally, no matter how much she enjoyed watching him move, how much she enjoyed listening to his gentle assurances and honeyed pleas.
But then... "I need you," he would whisper whenever she expressed doubt over their odds of success or the merit of their deeds. Too many times she would put those thoughts aside and imagine behind his mask, his eyes twinkling like the fireflies from her childhood, until she no longer had any reservation towards him, letting her gates open for him to invade and consume all she was.
It took her too long to realize that those words were his poison.
But now she was far from him, from the Fang, farther from home than she'd ever been. And yet, somehow, happy. There were no fireflies at Beacon, but that didn't mean she couldn't make new memories with her team and her new friends. And, if the need came, she wanted to ensure that they had good memories of her as well.
She hadn't exactly known what to think of Jaune being paired up with Yang. She knew so little about him, aside from what Ruby had told her. His awkward proposal to Weiss hadn't helped either. So, her protective instincts remained unsheathed. She'd immediately started considering just how she would approach him. Somehow get him to be alone with her without him getting too afraid.
The process was wracked with indecision. That was, until one afternoon, two days after Port had given out his assignment, that Jaune strode by her favorite corner of Beacon's library, looking down at thick graphic novel in his hand. When that happened, any reservation she'd had disappeared, replaced by a newfound confidence. And when that happened, she'd begun instinctually acting upon it. This was a sensation hardwired into every faunus. The newest volume of Ninjas of Love could wait.
"Hello Jaune," she greeted at him curtly, without looking up from her book.
From the upmost corner of her eyes, she saw Jaune's head snap up to attention. "Um, hey Blake," he greeted, bashful, meeting her eyes with his own. He had pretty eyes, she had to admit. Shy, but they shone a brilliant cerulean. "What's up?"
"Can we talk?"
Jaune's eyes widened, and Blake could read the fear in them. She knew that he knew she was not one to be crossed. She seemed to naturally had that effect on people, which made it difficult for her to meet and talk new people sometimes. That benefitted her much more when she was still a member of the Fang. "H-how important is it?"
"Well," she said, closing her book and putting it on the desk in front of her, "I'm taking time off of my leisure reading time in order to come to you, so it's important to me."
Jaune nodded. "Where to then?"
"You know," she began. "A lot of boys would've killed to getting paired up with one of the coolest and hottest people in the school."
Jaune swallowed. "I have no idea-"
"Oh, don't deny it," Blake said, grinning at him. "Anyone with eyes can tell that."
Jaune chuckled nervously. "Right. And you're worried I'll be too distracted by the eye candy in front of me and possibly take advantage of her, right?"
"That is a concern," Blake admitted. "But I doubt you'll get away with anything that malicious, especially the way you asked out Weiss to the dance..."
Jaune cringed, covering his face with his hands. "Oh gosh...I was cocky, okay? I've never asked anyone out in my life. I got some tips and learned to be myself, sure, but when that wasn't enough..." he trailed off."
"What exactly do you see in her?" Blake asked, curious. Weiss didn't seem like his type, to her at least. And aside from his rather unremarkable combat skills, he honestly wasn't bad looking himself, though he was a little on the thin side for her preference. Still, he'd been the kind of person she'd though would already have a girlfriend by now.
Jaune had stars in his eyes as he described Weiss to her. "She's smart, beautiful, confident...even the idea of her bossing me around is something I can live with. After all I grew up with seven sisters."
Blake's jaw dropped in awe. "Seven?"
"Having lots of kids in the family," Jaune chuckled. "Just so happens I got to be the only guy of the bunch, lucky me."
An image of a very young Jaune fawned over by a sea of blonde-haired girls appeared in Blake's mind, and it made her chuckle. "And yet none of them ever gave you dating advice?" she teased. Growing up surrounded by girls must've been quite an experience, one which Blake found herself in envy of. If she'd ever had a sibling, one who would look up to her or for her to look up to... gods, how things might've changed.
"They would've been sooo annoying about it," Jaune grumbled. "Especially Saffron. She met her wife when she was my age. Most of my family has, actually. But as it is...I don't know if I'll be so lucky."
Blake smiled. She began to reminisce the tales her parents told her of their own love story. How her father started off as a young aspiring activist, had a chance encounter with a pretty cat faunus who was a new arrival, and get adjusted to the island. The memories came flooding back. Her mother, teasing of how awful he'd been with courtship, and it had been her who had to ask him out, much to his embarrassment. Jaune, she realized, was just stuck in the same boat.
"Well, either way, I won't be pulling any stunts like the song with Weiss anymore," Jaune sighed. "Yang pretty much made me swear not to, and well, I'm pretty sure Weiss would shoot me down anyway..." he trailed off. "Does...does Weiss know I like her? I mean it's obvious to you, so..."
"I think," Blake began, "that you should come over to our dorm sometime and talk to her. Explain yourself."
"Um..." Jaune swallowed. "You sure that's a good idea?"
"You're not a bad guy," Blake said. "You're just kind of an idiot when you're lovestruck. I would know, I've been there. But right now, given that you and Yang have to work together, maybe it would be nice if we could setting the weirdness between you and Weiss and put it behind you? It mustn't feel nice to have that in the back of your head all the time, right?"
"Yeah..." Jaune sighed. "I guess it...just sounds scary, is all,"
Blake put a hand on his shoulder, and was glad when he did not recoil from her touch. "Talk to Yang about it. I'm sure she'll help you too, if you take that risk. No pressure though." She took out a notepad and pen she usually used to take notes for her diary, tore off a corner in the pad and then wrote her number on it. She held it out to Jaune. "Here. So you can let me know when you want to talk. Or...even potentially dating advice if you end up meeting someone else."
Jaune chuckled and took the scrap of paper. His mouth formed a sunny smile as he stared at it in awe, like he'd never seen a phone number before. "I'll think about it. Otherwise...thanks a lot, Blake."
Blake nodded, smiling as her initial fears dissipated, replaced with relief. She could finally relax knowing that Jaune was someone she, and therefore Yang, could trust...for now at least. But she swore to not allow herself to lose sleep over mere possibilities. Yes, sometimes boys could be cruel. Though now thousands of miles separated them, the wound Adam left on her heart wasn't anywhere close to healing. But she knew that locking away her heart would only let it fester. And she would only be missing out on the kindness the world had to offer her. After living in fear for far too long, it was just one of the many perks of no longer having to look over her shoulder.
