A/n: Sorry for the long wait, if anyone is even reading this.
Trigger warning: mentions of suicide
Dr. Keppler decided that she would check on her patient again, later. She was relieved that they had managed to get Agent Jareau to open up. What the father had done was beyond her capacity to understand but she knew that admitting that it had happened to oneself and to others was a huge step in the right direction. She was confident that with the right help, she would eventually be okay. Not that she would ever be able to get over it or forget it, no this trauma would always be part of her, but it is possible to learn to live with it and then it will become easier eventually.
Back in the room JJ asked Emily who was wiping away her own tears: "What are you thinking right now?" Emily sighed: "I'm so proud of you for telling me."
JJ looked up to the ceiling at breathed out: "You know, there is more..."
"Okay... Jayje I don't want you to feel obligated to tell me right now but I understand if you want to get it out." "I know, but I want to tell you."
"That's okay, thank you for trusting me."
"So... it wasn't just a one time thing, he did it pretty regularly, maybe about once a week. And I knew that it was wrong but I didn't know how to verbalize it at the time..."
"That's understandable, I mean a child is supposed to be able to trust their parent."
"Yeah, I... did you know that I had a sister?"
"No, I didn't."
"Rosaline, she was six years older than me and she was my idol", JJ smiled sadly while remembering, " I never knew that he was doing the same thing to her and she told our mother but she wouldn't believe her; she and everyone else refused to see him as anything other than the perfect, loving, white picket fence father. When Ros asked me whether he was hurting me, too, I couldn't tell her because I thought that she would blame herself for it, so I pretended to be fine, but one day when she was seventeen and I was eleven, she caught him one night and the next day...", JJ was crying at this point, Emily didn't want to interrupt her so she silently reassured her by rubbing her hand,
"the next day she came into my room and gave me her favourite necklace and told me that she loved me. In the following night I went to the bathroom and she was laying in the bathtub and she had killed herself... If I had said something to my mother or a teacher or even just to Rosaline, maybe she would still be alive."
"JJ, it's not your fault. It's only on your father. You were just a child and you couldn't have known. You did what you thought was best for your sister and I'm so sorry that she was in so much pain that she couldn't keep going."
"My sister wrote a farewell letter to my mom and she finally believed her that he did these things and we left him. My sister sacrificed her life to keep me safe."
"I'm so sorry Jayje", Emily said not really knowing what else to do, "it must have been horrible to carry that with you all this time... I don't really know what you need right now, but I'm here. You just have to ask."
"Thanks, I just want to get out of here and go home.", JJ said, trying to brush it off.
"About that, is everything okay with Will?", Emily decided to breach the subject.
JJ sighed: "It has not been easy lately. We disagree about everything and argue most of the time that we actually do see each other. He...he said that if I don't change anything, he will leave. He doesn't like my working hours and says that I'm not a good mother to Henry..."
Emily was overwhelmed with frustration and sadness, couldn't this woman catch a break? As if recovering from sexual violence wasn't enough, it was also her unprocessed childhood trauma that she had literally just told someone about and now the strained relationship and the lack of support from her partner. She hoped that nothing else was going on with Will but decided to not ask JJ about that right now.
"JJ, you know that you and Henry are welcome at my place at any time, there is no limit, you could stay as long as you like, I don't know if this is what you want or if it is even an option for you, but maybe a bit of distance from Will is what you need right now, especially with everything else going on.", Emily proposed.
"I don't know Emily", JJ replied carefully, even though one side of her completely agreed with Emily and just wanted to feel save for once and wanted to let go, "he's still the father of my child and it always takes two people, I haven't put much effort into our relationship recently."
"I'm not forcing you, it's just an offer, but you should think about yourself for a minute, do you think that Will can support you right now? Because Jayje, I'm worried about you and recovering physically and mentally will take some time and whether you like it or not, you will need help.", Emily hoped that she didn't push her friend too much, but the recovery was going to be very hard, even without having to deal with Will. She just wanted her to know that there were other options.
"I... I just don't know, I...", JJ started getting restless, "I just need to get out of here. Can you try to find Dr. Keppler and ask her about it?", she answered exasperatedly.
"Hey, Jayje, it's going to be okay", Emily said, trying to calm her down by rubbing her arm, "you don't have to decide anything yet, and while I get Dr. Keppler, why don't you try to rest a little more, I can see that your ribs are bothering you, even though you're trying to hide it from me.", Emily smirked, trying to bring a little light to the situation.
"Stop analysing me", JJ replied equally playful, much to the other agent's relief.
A/n: Please let me know what you think and if you want me to continue this story, I would have some ideas for example talking about therapy etc. but I would appreciate any ideas.
