*For Kittie, thank you! I love all my reviewers, few that they are. You guys make me think its worth it.
Nobu had given me a kimono.
Not unusual for a Danna to give his mistress such a gift. Certainly men in the past, including the Baron had given me such fine gifts of garments.
Nobu's however, exceeded them all. The Baron had given me an antique black five crested dragon Kimono, all fine designs done in first rate threads and silk. The Baron's gift was an expensive one, but given the circumstances in which I received it, it was not a treasured gift. It rated little in my mind. I was glad when mother laid it away, probably to be sold somewhere for an exuberant price.
I would not have cared if she threw it away in the street. Something that I doubt Mother did.
She liked money too much.
The Kimono that lay in the box in front of me was not black. I think Nobu was hoping to find some fabric to match my eyes. It was an ice blue Kimono with designs of the sea at the bottom. Whales and dolphins leapt over waves while golden suns and strands of sea weed waved about in the distance. Sea shells and starfish littered the hem. It was truly a work of art.
I felt that I was looking at a piece of the ocean when I beheld the spectacular gown.
"What a beautiful Kimono," I breathed. Nobu watched me with impassive eyes, trying to discreetly gauge my reaction.
"The color reminded me of you. I think it would be fitting for you to receive my guests wearing this."
"Surely they would be impressed as well," I murmured, touching the silk and marveling at its quality.
"It was crafted at my desire by a friend of mine. Arashino. He was at the Baron's party a year ago."
"Beautiful."
"There is a matching gold obi to go with it," Nobu commented offhandedly. "Arashino said he would have it delivered before the party. I gather it was taking him longer to complete than he thought initially."
I turned around and bowed low to Nobu, thanking him for the gift.
Nobu was annoyed with my gratitude.
"I am your Danna, Sayuri. Get up. I am supposed to shower you with gifts. It is not an uncommon occurrence."
I got up, slowly.
"All men like to be thanked, Nobu-san."
"Haven't I always told you that I am not like other men?" he growled.
I smiled at him.
"You have told me such things, but I would like to treat you like any man that has done me a kindness."
"Do you go around thanking every man that has ever done a kind thing for you?" Nobu asked sarcastically.
I thought of the Chairman and the day that he gave his handkerchief.
I had yet to thank him for his kindness that day.
"Not all men," I answered. Nobu gave me a look.
"I have some business matters to attend to. Amuse yourself for the rest of the day. The maids are at your disposal and there are paths outside that lead into the woods."
"Are you not going to take advantage of being away from Kyoto? Nobu-san has been saying that he has been working a great deal. Perhaps you should rest..."
"When I seek advice about how to handle the timing of my business affairs, I will ask for it. But until then leave me be."
I bowed my assent.
Nobu walked briskly out of the bedroom and downstairs. I imagined he had an office somewhere in the house devoted to affairs of business. It seemed even in this beautiful country estate, surrounded by woods, Nobu was determined to work, undeterred by matters of nature and beauty. Even myself was no obstacle to work where Nobu was concerned.
I thought of other men and how they would have sought to be cosseted and entertained constantly by a geisha. Every hour of the day would have been spent looking at this man or that one, telling him all the wonderful things that he wanted to hear.
Few understood just how demanding and tiresome a geisha's schedule was. They rarely had time to themselves. I supposed that I should have thanked Nobu for this respite, in my mind of course. But I didn't. I was a little off put by the abrupt manner in which he dismissed me. I suppose my ego had been inflated by years of being the center of attention. It's true that I had to listen to every man that I entertained as if the sun set and rose at his command, but it was also true that I was watched as if I myself brought the sun by my very presence.
I called the maid and asked her to bring my shawl before I set out to go wandering outside. She brought it quickly to me and I fastened it with a pearl enameled pin. Another gift from Nobu.
At last when I was wrapped and ready, I found myself excited. In Gion, I had walked by myself to the hairdressers, the paper shop and to Mameha's apartments a well as to my many engagements, but I was usually chauffeured by my dresser, or one of the maids.
Due to Hatsumomo's wild behavior, I guessed Mother did not put it past us to try to find boyfriends and meet them somewhere by ourselves.
Now that Nobu was my Danna, she did not have to worry anymore. I could not safely think in my mind of meeting with another man while being with Nobu-san. The thought of what he would do or say made my blood run cold.
That is why I decided to give up the Chairman. In my heart of hearts, I did not allow myself to love him.
The fact that I thought of him occasionally bought icy shivers to my spine.
Nobu was my Danna.
I belonged to him.
As I walked outside, I amused myself by keeping watch of all the novel things that I had not seen since childhood.
Rabbits were one. I saw big fat brown ones rushing in the high grass. Their big fat bodies moving like wild specks of dirt.
I smiled as a childhood memory, long forgotten, came to mind. My mother had loved rabbits. It was because she was born a rabbit, like I was born a monkey.
There were few rabbits in Yoroido. I guess it was because of the salty ground from the ocean.
I watched the rabbits until they all shied away from me, scared by the long shadow that I cast.
I made a turn and walked into a grouping of trees. There was a fluttering of birds in the distance, but other than that, the soft shuffling sound of my feet was the only noise heard. I walked for several minuets.
Quiet. Pure quiet.
The pine trees smelled fresh and their sap glistened on the outer edges of the bark. I put my hand on one of the trees and rubbed my fingers against the sap.
Like a hard sticky perfume, the scent clung to my skin.
I bent low and gathered some pine cones that had fallen at the base of the tree. I wanted some to bring back to the house. Like the tree, they carried the scent of the sap. Perhaps I could put them in bowls and have the maid place them in the bedroom.
I pondered something to carry them in.
It was a bit chilly, but I thought I would be fine without my shawl. I took it off, carefully clipping the pin to the undershirt of my kimono.
Spreading the shawl out on the needle covered ground, I began to toss cones into the middle of it. I thought that if Nobu would not come outside to see the trees, at least I could bring the essence of them to him.
I sorted through the pine cones, taking care to choose only the largest and most fragrant.
Another flock of birds passed overhead. I looked up to see their V formation in the sky. I smiled and then a raindrop landed on my nose, quickly followed by another.
It began to rain in earnest. It was not like the gentle spring rain that Nobu and I had experienced a week ago. This time, the wind blew from the north with hard gusts.
I gathered my pine cones into a bundle and the shawl to me.
It was not a far walk from the house. I had not gone far in the little woods.
Still, it was awkward walking briskly with the wind blowing the rain in my eyes. The width of my kimono only allowed me to take little steps.
Holding my hand in front of my eyes, I made it back to the house. The maid exclaimed frantically while she brought some towels and tea.
"Sayuri!" Nobu shouted.
He walked briskly towards me. I saw that he had his outer coat on.
"Where were you?" he thundered.
"I went outside," I said, puzzled. "You had told me that I might amuse myself."
"You were amusing yourself in a thunderstorm?" he asked. I made a face.
"I was outside when the rain came."
"Without a shawl? Your kimono is soaked through!"
"I had a shawl on when I left...but,"I gestured towards my bundled pine cones that now laid on the floor next to me.
"Please Nobu-san. Do not reprimand me like a child," I told him calmly. The maid hovered in the doorway.
"Run a hot bath," Nobu barked at her. She fled upstairs.
"You acted like a child, being in the rain without a shawl. Wouldn't you say?"
"It was not raining when I was going outside. People get caught in the rain Nobu-san. It happens."
"People also have the good sense to wear something more weather proof than a silk Kimono when that happens," he shot back.
"I'm going upstairs to change, Nobu-san" I told him getting up. He growled like he wanted to say more but I turned my back to him and left. I feared that if I stayed there too long, I would lose all politeness.
The maid had done as Nobu had asked and had drawn a hot bath.
I took my time in the bath tub, brooding over the angry words that Nobu threw at me. I felt his concern, but I also felt his derision.
When I was done, I had the maid summon my dresser and I was dressed in another Kimono. I choose a nondescript grey one with a dark blue obi. I took care only to make sure that the rain did not ruin my hair. The wax had protected it from getting wet and losing its shape.
For once I did not bother with make-up. I suspected that I was not going to be seeing much of Nobu tonight.
I looked at the window and noted that it was still raining. The sky had lost all sunshine and now it was as dark as night.
The maid had left a candle in the bedroom. I heard the phone ringing downstairs. I guessed Nobu would turn again to his matters of business.
I wished I had bought a kabuki magazine or a book, but I had none. For some reason, I did not bother the maid by asking her if she had any.
I sat by the window and watched the rain fall against the glass. Inside, I felt as heavy as the rain.
The maid knocked on the door and came into the room bearing a tray of tea and some small sweet cakes.
She set them before and inquired if I needed anything. I told her no and she went away.
The tea looked hot and inviting but I did not drink it. My lips were pressed into a thin tight line.
After an hour or so had passed, I gave up watching the rain and went in search of my dresser.
He undressed me and took the kimono away. I wore a light cotton sleeping robe when I entered Nobu's room again.
It was empty.
Nobu must be still working.
I perched on the futon and then laid myself back.
The room seemed chilly. I thought of asking the maid for another blanket. Once again I decided against.
I sighed in the dark room and then I drifted off to sleep.
