Hello there...


I walk through my days like a ghost in a dream,

but the field carries on and my past follows me.

It's hard moving on from the things you've done wrong,

when they play in your head like an old fashioned song.

Brandi Carlile, "The things I regret"


6. THE TRUTH

There's something that Caroline told him once, and he recalls it when he sees her descending the stairs, smiling brightly with those clean eyes he loves so much.

This was important to her, winning the pageant, but he wouldn't know because he'd been trying to kill Amber Bradley somewhere else. Even when they could have made their own memory years later, he was a monster trying his best to keep his emotions buried deep underneath it all, and that meant pushing her away and hurting her the most.

Caroline forgave him then, like she always did. She was more forgiving with him than he was with herself or anyone else. But Stefan knew he had to spend his life making it up for her… and he never got the chance to do it. No, he has to admit, he wasted his chance to do it.

So maybe now he's gladly stealing a moment that should belong to her boyfriend, and he can feel her brother and Elena's stares on him, but he doesn't care.

When they dance, it's just as it's always been, and things are right back in their place. Only it doesn't last, and he is forced to wake up when the party's over.

"Thank you for today, Stefan. I can't believe I won, and it wouldn't have been the same if you weren't here too." She smiles at him. "But… I think our friends are getting weird ideas, so… there are more events related to Founders' Day, but I hope you understand, I'm going with Matt."

It physically hurts to pretend he's okay with this.

"Of course. I just stepped in because this was important for you, but now you have the title, my job is done."

He stays away so as not to put her in a difficult situation, so the result is also his fault.

It's unfair to blame Bonnie for refusing to help them with the Gilbert device, or Elena for not driving Caroline home that night as she said she would. Stefan knew, too, that there were certain things that needed to happen so his brother would open his eyes, which is why Pearl and Anna are dead, why he didn't do more to stop John Gilbert from getting it in the first place.

But somehow it's always because he's trying to be a good brother that things like this happen.

He did not expect Matt and Caroline to go together with Tyler like they did last time. After all, they didn't come together and things between them did not seem to be okay. So Stefan relaxed a bit too much, and this is the result.

Even though he knows it is the perfect chance to catch Katherine and maybe end her for good, he still runs to the hospital when he hears about the accident.

He should have stayed closer to her.

"She's weak. They don't know if she's going to make it." Bonnie's words are echoing in his head while they keep discussing what to do.

"I can give Caroline some blood…" Damon suggests, then glances at him, "or Stefan could."

"It's too risky," Elena argues "I can't agree to that."

"This is Caroline. We can't let her die." Bonnie turns to him, perhaps because she still trusts him more than she trusts Damon at this point."Do it."

No matter what her reasons are, she loves his friend at this moment.

"I'll look after Caroline. You should look more into what happened with John."


He becomes the watchdog by her bedside all through the night, even with Matt and Liz around.

"Listen, Stefan, I understand you are friends, but you don't have to stay here, you know that." Matt tells him. "I'll take care of her."

To be honest, he fantasizes about compelling Matt to go away, but then he would have to give many explanations one day, and he'd rather avoid that. It's not his place to be there so he pretends to leave but remains close enough to take care that Katherine doesn't pay a visit again.

Thankfully, humans like Matt need to sleep, so he gets to be the one there when she wakes up.

"Stefan… what happened?"

"You had a car accident, but it's going to be okay."

"What about Matt?" She is quick to ask. "And Tyler?"

"They are fine. You got the worst part."

Her gaze falls on his hand that is resting on top of hers. He didn't even realize it, but it's just one of the natural reactions that come to him when he's around her.

"What are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you to wake up. I was worried about you. We all were." There's a pause when he just feels her relax and their eyes meet again. "I should probably call your mom."

"She's not here, is she?" She sighs, "forget it, I know already."

"Your mother cares about you, Caroline."


"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you have feelings for the blondie. It was strange when you two started to hang out, and you decided to keep the high schooler facade, but the Court's dance?" Damon seems to have been waiting for this moment, leaning on the wall of the hospital corridor with that smug look on his face. "What I can't understand is why. How can you like that bubblehead? Didn't you reject her when you had your chance?"

"Please stop talking."

"I mean, it's hard to forget because she was heartbroken, I remember. It gave me the perfect chance to get fresh blood for a while, but st-

The punch in the face sends him to the other end of the corridor, but Damon is back on his feet fast enough that no one notices.

"Shut up."

"You are hiding something."

"So what if I am? Can't you just be happy to confirm I do not have feelings for Elena anymore? And that you don't have to feel remorse for being in love with her?"

"I kissed her."

Nothing new there either.

"I thought it was Elena, but it was actually Katherine. She's back."

"Do you still think she deserves you waiting for her?"

"I don't know." Damon acknowledges. "I guess we are going to find out soon enough who it is that she really wants. But if it's you, brother… Well, you are putting a target on Caroline's back."

Without his brother's warning, Stefan would still be aware of this truth. Right now he feels time pass as a ticking bomb, because even if Katherine doesn't have the chance to turn Caroline at the moment, she's in danger just by being associated to him. He remembers everything that woman did to Elena back then, so what could happen to Caroline who doesn't even know what's happening around her?

"Just so you know, I'm going to kill Katherine Pierce as soon as I get the chance."


She looks so serene in her sleep, and he's almost swept by his memories again. He has to remind himself this is not the Caroline that loves him, and so he's always holding back, but…

"You are still here." She barely opens her eyes at first, but they are looking straight at him. "Stefan, you don't have to do this, you know. I already know you care."

He smiles at her. "Mayor Lockwood is dead, and your mom has to go to investigate that. And Matt just went to change his clothes at home. I'm sorry, but you are stuck with me for now."

"Tyler's dad is dead? What happened?"

"Someone killed him. We don't know who or why…" Another lie.

She sits on the bed and searches for a glass of water.

"I don't understand how all these bad things happen at the same time. You'd think this town is cursed or something, but I swear, nothing out of the ordinary ever happened here."

He sighs.

"How are you feeling now?"

She frowns.

"I know I went through surgery, but I'm actually feeling quite well. I can't believe I almost died."

"That's because I fed you my blood."

There would never be a right time to do this, but at least for now it's just the two of them, and any minute she stays ignorant of the truth is something Katherine could use to her advantage.

"What?" The confused look in her face is quickly followed by a chuckle. "Are you trying to joke right now? I have to say you suck at it."

"I'm a vampire, Caroline."

It's not something she can easily believe, but he keeps his face straight, and she's unsettled by this confession even when she doesn't believe it.

"Ok. That's enough. Just because I said I like Twilight you don't have to make fun of me like this."

"Damon is a vampire too. All the animal attacks that started around the time we arrived? It was him. But there are others too."

"Stop it."

"Vicki was turned into one, too."

She shrinks in fear, just for some seconds until she grabs a hold of herself, and he knows that deep down she knows it's true. How many times has she woken up without remembering what she had been doing before?

"You can't be a vampire. You don't have problems with the sun."

He waves his hand to show his ring. "Daylight ring created by a witch."

She laughs. "Now you're saying there are witches too?"

"Bonnie, for example."

Her laugh fades and it's like time freezes right then and there.

"Get out."

"I can't. Not until someone else comes to stay with you. It's dangerous."

"I said, get out!"

She throws a pillow at him, and Stefan flinches. Maybe it's because he's done plenty of awful things, some that even deserved her hatred, but if there is one thing he'd never experienced… that was Caroline being afraid of him.