4/14 Afternoon


"Just a decaf for me."

"Coming right up." Sojiro said in place of grumbling at the simple order. He knew that some people just couldn't handle caffeine, but it always managed to irk him whenever he was asked to brew such a basic set of beans. Took no skill to make it, so it was just like doing a chore around the café. About the only thing it did for him was just make time to think on whatever was on his mind, which usually wasn't much. 'Then again, I guess I do have more to think about these days.' He let out a tired sigh as his thoughts drifted towards his newest charge, as he was doing more and more often the last five days.

He had to remind himself that it really only had been five days since he moved in. Felt way longer than it actually was. Sojiro honestly wished that the kid was more of a hassle, because at least then he would have a better understanding of what kind of person he was instead of feeling like he was walking on eggshells every time they interacted. Granted, considering how their first real interaction with each other ended, it's not like he had anyone to blame but himself.

'I did apologize, but he didn't even really accept it.' What he said was that it wasn't wrong for Sojiro to act that way, even though it clearly pissed him off something fierce. That wasn't the same thing as forgiving him, let alone even being forgiving. More along the lines of being dismissive, which just made Sojiro all the more confused. 'I didn't even really tell him the truth.' Sojiro's eyes scrunched up as he began to pour water onto the beans, the flowing scent from the steam doing little to alleviate his mood like it usually did. After he finished making the cup, he let out a long, exhausted breath as he served the cup of decaf.

"Rough day?" The customer asked as he took a cautious sip of the fresh brew, nodding his head in satisfaction. His dislike of decaf notwithstanding, Sojiro would close shop if he ever made a poor cup of coffee.

"No, just a lot on my mind." Sojiro grumbled as he put a hand up to his neck, stretching it against his grip. He let out a surprised breath when he managed to pop a kink that had been bothering him for a couple of days. Feeling slightly more conversational than he typically did, he decided to vent to this random guy he didn't know. "Got this kid I'm looking after. Having trouble figuring out what to do with him."

"Why not just give him his space?" The man took a longer sip of his coffee, wincing slightly after a second too long. "Teenager, I take it?" Sojiro hummed in response. "Yeah, figured. You think they're a handful when they barely reach your knee," he let out a mirthful chuckle, "it's a whole other world of headaches when puberty sets in."

Despite himself, Sojiro couldn't help but chuckle in agreement. "Trust me, I know that much." The man raised his cup at that, taking another swig before Sojiro continued. "Thing is though..." he looked away from the man, fumbled with his lips, his eyes furrowing in contemplation. "I've tried the 'give them space' trick before. Don't think it's the best plan for this case." His thoughts drifted to home, the one door in that long hallway staring at him in silent condemnation. He couldn't even remember the last time he opened it.

"Well, what's even the issue then?" Sojiro quirked his brow as he looked back at the stranger.

"That's between me and him." He cautioned, to which the customer raised a placating hand. Even so, Sojiro felt compelled to continue. "It's just..." He took a moment to search for the words, not wanting to reveal too much of his private life or Kurokuya's. "I want to help the kid out. Just don't know how to go about it with him. Doesn't help that I upset him not too long ago."

"Ah, that certainly puts a damper on things." The customer took to spinning his mug of coffee by the handle, the steam from the fresh brew dissipating into the small café, fading in tune with the soft jazz that could scarcely be heard over the sound system. "Well, I won't act like an expert, but if I were you, I'd just give it time to breath. Let tempers die down, make a routine to settle into so they feel comfortable." He took a longer sip of coffee. "Sooner than later, they'll forget all about it."

"... Just go with the flow?" Sojiro clarified, his lips falling with every word. "That's it?"

"Yeah!" The man perked up, sounding mighty pleased with himself and his sage wisdom. "Worked out fine enough with me and my kids." He finished his advice and coffee both. "Besides," he got up from his seat on the bar, placing his payment on the table, "doesn't sound like your kid's doing anything dangerous. Lots of crazy stuff in the news these days, so I'd just be grateful it's not my kid they're talking about." Sojiro's face grimaced as the man turned to leave, waving as he left the door.

"He's not my kid." He muttered to himself in the empty café, shaking his head as he brought a hand up to rub at his eyes. Taking a deep breath, he grabbed the cup from the counter and deposited it in the sink, turning the tap on. 'No wonder I hate talking to customers. They love to talk, but they never really say anything, do they?'

Sakura took the time washing the dish, languidly rubbing away the spots of coffee and buds of soap. 'Just go with the flow.' His eyes strained as the words repeated in his head, the past couple of days playing out in his mind. "What the hell kind of flow does he even have?"

Sojiro Sakura liked to think he was good at getting a read on someone after only a few interactions. It was a necessary skill to have in the restaurant business, particularly a café. Yet in all the time he had interacted with Kurokuya Kouzai, he felt as though he only understood him less and less. He was quiet and polite, but push the wrong button and that side of him went away in a flash. He was a damn good cleaner if the fact that the attic looked as though Sakura never once used it as a forgotten storage area was any indication after only a day and a half of Kurokuya living in it. Yet he refused payment after washing the dishes he left after a busy day and needing to head home, doing his job for him.

He turned the tap off, depositing the clean mug onto the drying rack and let out an exhausted sigh as he stretched his worn out back. 'Then again, given my past experience with troubled kids, it's not like I should have any reason to believe I'm any good at this.' He began to think why he even bothered taking him in. He already had one kid to take care of, was already doing a poor enough job with just one, so why add another?

His chest tightened, the image of a scared little girl with orange hair flashing in front of his eyes before shifting to a spot of clipped black, a playful smile on the woman's face. It quickly distorted into the face of a woman who had completely been broken down by the world, her eyes hollow and face set in an impassive mask, before then morphing into the face of his newest charge. There were little differences between the two. Perfect reflections of the other.

As they all flashed before his eyes, a creeping sensation slowly spread throughout Sojiro Sakura's entire body. It sapped him of any strength he had, a dull throbbing beginning to take root in his head as his eyes became heavy. It felt as though those faces were constantly judging him, only serving to increase the all too familiar feeling that overtook him.

The feeling of guilt.

He just finished drying his hands off as a phone started to go off. He looked to the one sitting on the corner of the bar before realizing it was his cell phone. A smile crept up on his lips, thinking he knew who it was one the other end. She was really the only person who called him on his cell, given that she was the only person who had it.

"Is this Sojiro Sakura?" So he was quite surprised when he heard the hesitant yet professional voice speak up, blinking at the clipped tone the unfamiliar caller had.

"It is." He clicked his tongue, hoping that this wasn't just some telemarketer that he carelessly answered. "Who is this?"

"This is Michiko Sasaki, I'm the administrative assistant at Shujin Academy." The woman paused, Sojiro hearing the sound of her lips straining together through the phone.

"What is it?" His mind drifted to his earlier topic of conversation, a twisting feeling in his gut he couldn't explain creeping up on him.

"Well, you see... Ah, how to put it?" Sojiro felt his temper begin to surface, letting out a short sigh through his nose.

"Is it about Kouzai?" His answer was silence on the other end, which he took as confirmation. "What's the problem?" Brining up his free hand to rub at his head, he heaved a heavy breath. 'Speak of the devil, I guess.'

"... I have some bad news for you, sir." Sojiro tried to ignore his stomach continuing to lurch and twist as his impatience continued to grow.

"He's not in trouble, is he?" He liked to think that Kurokuya wasn't the kind of kid to start causing problems simply because he was upset. Given how quiet the kid was he probably wasn't, but Sojiro really had no idea what to make of the young man in the short time he knew him.

"... He's been involved in an accident." The growing tightness in Sojiro's stomach was suddenly gone, leaving an empty swirl of air as he heard the words. He blinked once, twice before remembering to answer.

"What do you mean accident?" He sounds calmer than he felt, his chest filling with ice as worry began to take over.

"He's been sent to the hospital-"

"The hospital?!" The shout he lets out could be heard from outside the café, a prospective customer walking away from the door just before their hand could grasp the handle. "What the hell happened?!"

"There was an incident at school, he was involved, he's been sent to the hospital because of it." The woman's voice is rushed and strained, clearly struggling to find the words to mollify Sakura.

A thousand questions flow through his mind in seconds. Is he alright? How long ago was it? Why is he only being contacted now when he had reached the hospital and not before? "Which hospital?!" Is what he settles for.

She tells him. Sojiro hangs up the phone and rips his apron off, grabbing his coat and leaving his hat behind in the rush. He only barely remembered to flip the sign to closed as he locked the door and rushed home. He dropped his keys on the ground as he scrambled to unlock the door, letting out a stream of curses he was shocked came from his mouth as he snatched them back up. All but ripping the door open, he rushed to the garage, hitting the button for the door to start opening.

"Futaba!" He yells out as he runs back inside, stopping at the stairs that led to the second floor, hesitating as one of his feet landed on the first step. "Look, uh, something's come up, so I'm probably going to be home late! There're some leftovers in the fridge if it gets late!" He stays rooted to the spot, left confused on what to do next. He knows he needs to get to the hospital as soon as possible to understand what the hell was going and whether Kurokuya was okay, but he felt the need to do something else. Like he was forgetting an important step he needed to do before he left.

His felt his pocket buzz and he nearly ripped the cloth open as he tapped the screen, reading the text he got. "I'm fine, it's just something happened to that kid I took in!" He heard the garage door finish opening, compelling him to take his foot of the staircase. "Look, I need to go! I'm sorry about how sudden this is, but I promise I'll be back as soon as I can!" He felt like an idiot for saying that, but quickly dashed those feelings away as he ran to his car, sliding the key into the ignition and driving on the roads as fast as he could get away with.

Traffic is terrible, causing his temper to flare up in an ugly combination with the sheer panic that was coursing through his mind. A cold sweat breaks over his entire body, sickly contrasting with the sweltering fever that was washing over his body from his anger.

Then he remembers that he has to do something and all feelings of anger fade away in an instant, a tense dread making his chest nearly implode in realization. The stray idea to not do it enters his thoughts, but he quickly dashes it away, resolving himself to the decision.

A wry, derisive chuckle forces itself out of his parched throat, making it flare up in pain. 'Never thought I'd making a call like this.' He dials a number, and the other side rings a few times before answering.

They pick up. "Hello?" She sounds as tired as she did the first day he met her.

'Sojiro Sakura. We regret to inform you, but one of your colleagues has regrettably passed away,' was what those people from so long ago told him.

"Hey, it's me. Look, I'm sorry, but I've got some bad news." Is what he says. He couldn't tell which version sounded worse.


4/14 Afternoon


Sleep never came easily to me. Whenever it did, I'd be lucky if I lasted more than an hour before the nightmares and memories that I'd rather forget took over and woke me. Usually, I would just get up no matter the time and set my mind to some task I could do to keep occupied. They all involved vigilantism, so I was never without plentiful distractions. But in the few moments before sleep overtook me, before my mind truly faded away and let my body get what rest it could, everything would suspend around me. A pause, one that I somehow always recognized when it came, signaling that I was finally about to slumber. My senses would still be active, even in the recesses of my night terrors, but dulled. Diluted.

That's how I knew that what I was experiencing now wasn't sleep, but something else entirely. Instead of a slowly easing drone, what I felt was more akin to being submerged. I felt, but only what was truly around me, and even then, the effect was so thick that all I knew was that I was in contact with something, I just couldn't tell what. Panic began to settle in, my heart beating against my ribs in a slowed intensity as I try to find out what's happening to me. As I searched for an answer, the strange thought that maybe I had lost my powers entered my mind.

A slow, rhythmic beeping noise made its way into my ears, and instantly I knew where I was. Dead resignation replaced the panic in my chest, accompanied by every muscle in my body going tense. At least, I know they do without truly feeling it, because it was the reaction I always had in this environment. A place that I spent the most of my time when I was younger, every visit telling me the same thing over and over again, and despite knowing this, hoping that I would hear a different answer.

Perhaps this was what I wanted. The answer I hoped for. This weightlessness, this nothing around my body. Was this what it was like for other people? No pain, no overstimulation?

No noise?

Then it beings to creep back. The sharp sting of my ears picking sounds from far away, the cool and warm brush of air prickling at my skin. All of the old familiar feelings, creeping their way back in, letting me know that there was no escaping it.

My hands clench against something soft – fabric, latex, metal edges, muscles taught/sore/overworked - fingers snapping in a series of popping clicks. Groaning, my eyes move back and forth behind their eyelids. I try to reign in my senses, forcing them back under my control. Feeling slowly begins to flow back into my body and -

Scalpels digging through skin, forceps spreading wounds open, digging for glass cutting muscle/skin and - I twitch at the sudden influx, sharply breathing through my nose. Every muscle goes tight, making every wound that I have known in that moment.

"... he just move?" A voice drifts to my attention. My eyes slowly peel open, immediately the action bringing a train onto them at the high beam lights reflecting on the floor in the room.

"... A REFLEX." Another voice stabs into my eardrums, causing me to whine out in pain. My eyes open all the way and only now do I realize that I'm lying on my stomach as I stare at reflective flooring. I open my mouth, a choking gag echoing in the room and in my ears. I try to speak up, but another piece of glass being pulled from my back turns my voice into a droning whimper. I can feel the forceps stop a few inches above my skin, blood dripping from the glass back into the open wound.

"DOCTOR?" The voice stabs into my head, like a cold knife being driven into my brain. The forceps get put down and a set of thundering footsteps come round to my head. A man in full surgical garb enters my vision, his eyes widening when he sees mine open.

"HE'S AWAKE!" He half shouts, making the pain in my head worsen into a descending spiral of ringing static. He blurs when he exits my vision, a chorus of shouting and orders being thrown around the room.

"... the correct amount?!"

"What do-?!"

"GIVE HIM ANOTHER-!"

They all merge into a discord that overtakes me, transforming the slowly encroaching rush into a cavalcade of invading sensations. I start shaking uncontrollably, instinctually reacting to the pain, every twitch making my wounds scream out as the shards of glass shifted inside them. Tears formed on the edges of my eyes, further blurring the image of a doctor that told me calming nothings.

A cold flow invades my arm, a choked sob escaping me as it spreads throughout my system. My metabolism makes the anesthetic take affect soon after it enters my bloodstream, my arm going completely numb in seconds. Ironic, considering it's what caused me to wake up in the middle of surgery. Soon, the numbness from before returns in full force, every inch of my body feeling as though cold water has replaced my muscles. Yet instead of feeling calm at the knowledge I would no longer be awake during a surgery, all I felt was dread at what was waiting for me after it was over.

And above all, there was only one person's wellbeing that I was invested in. "Shi...ho..." Her name dies on my lips, my eyes quickly shutting closed soon after.


Atuhor's Note

What's this? A new chapter in just a little bit under a month? Why yes, it is! Granted, it still took me just under four weeks to update, but hey, baby steps.

My main focus with this chapter was, as you can see, to give more of a dive into Sojiro's character and what he thinks of Kurokuya. He's rather contrarily acting much kinder to the protagonist due to the fact he can quite clearly see that there is just something very wrong with him, but he also is still testing the waters so to speak, so he has no idea how to interact or reprimand him. That, and I also wanted to give some quick peeks at his own personal reasons for even accepting Kurokuya to begin with, hopefully dropping some hints at his yet undiscovered past with a certain someone and their research.

Please comment and critique, and I hope to see you till the end.