Hi all! I hope you're all staying well, safe, and healthy.
So, I'm not sure if you're aware but the last chapter absolutely killed me lol. Usually writing these chapters just flows, like poetry or maybe a song, but last chapter was more like pulling teeth. Every sentence felt forced, was overthought, nothing felt natural… in short, I was struggling. Partly because of that, and partly because I have original novels I'm working on (I actually published a sequel last week!), I'll be moving to weekly updates. Updates will occur Friday unless stated otherwise.
On that note, please enjoy the chapter! Lots of Cloud and Tifa in this one.
The Sector 6 slum hissed past the train window in a blur of gray and brown. It was cold out, the telltale sign of a changing season, and condensation spotted the window as the train rattled down the tracks. Each stomach-plunging bounce brought the sound of grinding gears and shrieking metal, and the few working lights in the car flickered as the car was thrown from side to side. Most passengers hunkered down in their seats to keep from being thrown off balance. Very few made any sort of conversation.
Tifa usually enjoyed the peace and quiet of the slum train. The quiet helped her collect her thoughts after a long day, but right now, she wanted a distraction. No; needed a distraction. Her mind was a whirlwind of memories and emotions, some good, some bad. All orbited a certain blond-haired man sitting beside her.
Her ruby gaze flicked to Cloud, who had slouched into his seat and leaned against the dividing wall. Her heart ached for him. Ached for his detached expression, his glazed eyes, the trickle of dried blood at his elbow. Clearly he was sick, or injured, and needed help. Tifa bit her lip, unsure what to do. Wherever he had come from, whatever world he slipped out of… it didn't take an oracle to know that it wasn't a good place. So should she even mention it? Should she ask what happened? Or would he bring it up on his own, even if even wanted to talk about it, and she should try for small talk instead?
Tifa tore her gaze away, her hands balled on her knees, and simply didn't know how to act. She hadn't seen Cloud in seven years. Seven! And while she had imagined their reunion, she had always pictured it as a warm, touching time. Not… whatever this was.
God, what should she even say?
"Are you okay?" she finally asked. Her voice seemed too loud in the car, too out of place, and she bit her lip to keep from saying anything more. This was a mistake. After all, Cloud had always been quiet. If he wanted to talk, he'd talk.
And she didn't expect him to. He didn't seem to have heard her, and instead stared at the opposite wall with a thousand mile stare. His thoughts were clearly elsewhere, clearly somewhere that pained him, and before Tifa's mind could catch up, she found herself reaching towards him, to offer some sort of comfort…
But then Cloud glanced at her, as if her question had finally registered, and smiled. Her hand froze between them. It was a small smile. A sad smile, barely more that an upward twitch of his lips, but it was a smile all the same. "Yeah," he finally said.
Tifa dropped her hand onto his arm, trying and failing to ignore how thin he was, how pale. Well, he had always been slender, and had always been fair-skinned, but… god. "Are you sure?" she asked. There was no stopping the worry that bled into her voice.
The mako in Cloud's eyes flared a bit, bright and luminous, before fading back into shades of sea glass. "Yeah."
"What..." The train car suddenly rattled, and cut Tifa off with a harsh squeal of metal. When it calmed, Tifa continued, "What… What happened to you?" Her gaze dropped to the crook of his elbow. "You're hurt. And..." She bit her lip, her voice trailing off.
After a moment, Cloud's gaze followed her own. He blinked at the dried blood, as if noticing it for the first time, before he suddenly winced and his hand flew to his temple. "I..." His breath whistled between his teeth. "I..."
Tifa's hand gripped his arm a bit tighter. Anxiety, mixed with a heady dose of regret, twisted her gut. "Never mind," she said quickly. She pushed him too hard, too quickly. She should have stayed silent. Should have waited for Cloud to bring it up. "Forget I asked."
But Cloud shook his head. "I…" He slowly lowered his hand, slowly blinked at the far wall. His thousand-mile stare had returned, but it seemed a little clearer now, as if he actually saw something wherever he was looking. "I left," he said simply. His voice was quiet but certain. "And I can't go back."
Tifa squeezed his arm, a silent show of support. "Go back where?" she asked, her voice soft. Swallowing, she continued, "Did you… did you leave SOLDIER?"
Cloud glanced at her, his brow furrowed with confusion.
"SOLDIER," Tifa repeated. Her gaze lifted to his eyes – those luminous, green-tinged, sea glass eyes – before dropping to her lap, to her hand fisted against her black skirt. When Cloud made no move to answer, she quietly added, "I noticed your eyes." Lifting her gaze, she continued, "You were in SOLDIER, weren't you?"
Cloud frowned, a mere twitch of his lips, before he nodded. It was a hesitant nod. Unsure.
Maybe he didn't want her to know about it.
"So how did you get to Sector 6?" Tifa asked, changing subjects. "If I had known you were in Midgar," she added with a faint smile, "I would have said hello."
At that, Cloud's expression skewed with confusion. Confusion and a hint of pain, and he pressed a hand against his elbow, an unconscious gesture. "Don't... remember," he finally managed. Her voice was tight with strain, and then he glanced about the train car, at the rows of benches and the scattered people, as if seeing it for the first time. His frown deepened. "Where…"
"We're going back home," Tifa quickly explained. "I'll take you to -" Without warning the train shuddered to a stop, a sharp hiss of brakes and steam. There was a few muffled curses as people were thrown into each other. Cloud, having been leaning against a divider, had been able to keep his balance. He didn't seem too pleased with the jolt though, and pinned Tifa with something that could have been a frown.
"I don't like trains," he stated at Tifa's questioning stare.
At that, Tifa blinked… and then chuckled. She wasn't even sure why, but his tone – the indignance in it – relieved her. Sure, Cloud was out of it for now, but with a clean clothes, a warm meal, and a full night's rest… he'd be just fine.
"I'm sorry," she said, swallowing another chuckle, and helped Cloud to his feet. His eyes suddenly glazed and he swayed against her, but only for a moment, until he was able to find his footing again. Even so, Tifa wrapped her arm around his waist to steady him, and made sure that he was close against her as they stepped off the train. She didn't want him falling into the tracks.
Sector 7 was different from Sector 6. Drabber. Dirtier, with less wood and more metal. Cloud squinted against the streetlamps before tensing.
"What's wrong?" she asked. But Cloud only relaxed, and shook his head in response.
Tifa frowned and glanced around the platform, trying to spot anything that would startle Cloud, but didn't see anything unusual. Maybe it had been the amount of people on the platform. Or maybe it was the constant Sector 7 scent of oil, sweat, and rotten eggs. Goddess above knew that she hated it.
Holding him a bit closer against her, both to provide comfort and support, she exhaled in relief when Cloud followed her lead and began to walk. His footsteps were unsteady and uneven beside her, but at least he was supporting most of his weight. "I live near here, actually," Tifa said, if only to fill in the silence. "It's just a few streets away." She inclined her head towards a path lined with rusting fences and metal sheets, and Cloud's gaze followed her own. "My apartment is a little small, but it'll work for now, until we can find you a place to stay. Unless…" A new thought occurred to her then, and she bit her lip. "Unless you need to leave soon?"
Truth be told, she didn't think Cloud had much of a choice in staying – he certainty wouldn't be going anywhere fast – but even so, it was a relief when he finally nodded.
"Good," Tifa said. The knot of tension uncoiled within her, but only slightly. "Are you hungry?"
At that, she felt Cloud tense again, and he wouldn't meet her gaze when she glanced at him.
"Cloud?"
He shrugged, a jerky movement.
That was answer enough for her. Her expression softened as she turned back to the turn road and said, "Well, I'm starving. And you're lucky," she cheerfully continued, "because I just got back from Sector 6. There's an open air market there. Maybe we can go together sometime, because they have the best apples, pears, and there's a woman that bakes this almond bread..."
Stark realization hit Tifa fast and hard in the gut.
Cloud noticed, because he suddenly turned to her with eyes bright with mako. "Tifa?"
His voice, small and quiet and concerned, jolted Tifa from her thoughts, and she forced herself to smile. "Everything's fine," she said, even as she thought, Damn it. She had dropped her groceries at the Sector 6 station and forgot to pick them back up. They were probably still there. No, no they wouldn't – someone would have definitely stolen it all by now. Her breath whistled between her teeth. That had been her favorite basket, too. Not to mention she had bought wine, whine that she had been looking forward to.
Damn, she thought again, just as Cloud shifted against her. "Tifa?" he said again.
She shook her head. "Sorry," she said quickly. Cloud's expression shifted from confusion to concern, but she smiled at him, and his expression smoothed back into blank indifference. "We have food at the bar, so we can get food there. And I think I have clothes that fit you," Tifa added, glanced at Cloud's thin frame.
Color suddenly spotted Cloud's cheeks.
Tifa frowned until she realized why he was blushing, and heat quickly burned her own cheeks. "No!" she said quickly. Cloud only turned away, clearly embarrassed, and she hurriedly continued, "No, I mean, I sometimes help with laundry for the team, and Biggs…" She sighed, a harsh sound. Cloud wouldn't know who Biggs was, and besides, she didn't want him to get the wrong idea. "I mean, I have clean men's clothes that someone forgot to pick up, and you can borrow them. That's what I meant," she added, her shoulder's slumped. "I didn't mean… my clothes."
After a moment, a long moment, Cloud finally nodded. There were still hints of color on his cheeks, but beneath the streetlights – and now the neon glow of the many Sector 7 shops and signs – it was hardly noticeable. In fact, if she didn't know what to look for, his blush wasn't noticeable at all.
Tifa's lips curved into a smile, soft and warm. "Hey, Cloud..."
He glanced at her, expectant.
I'm glad you're here, she wanted to say. But she held her tongue – she didn't want to embarrass him further, after all – and instead said, "We're almost there."
Back at the train station, a shrill whistle pierced the air as the train department.
In another sector, a different train hummed along the tracks. These tracks were modern, clean, and ran on mako-enhanced magnets so the train cars ran quick and silent along its length. There was no grinding metal. No hiss of steam, or scraping gears, or sudden jolts that clacked teeth together. Not at all. It was comfortable. Peaceful, even, and Aerith had a feeling that she could get used to this.
But perhaps with different company. Tseng sat beside her, his presence heavy and cold, his legs crossed at the knee and his arms crossed across his chest. As Tseng had escorted her to the hospital to visit Zack, he had declared that it was his duty to see her safely returned home for the evening. Zack hadn't liked that, of course. Zack had protested, argued with the Turk, and had even tried to stubborn his way out the door… until a nurse, small and petite and older, strongly told him that he needed to lie down and accept additional treatment to his chest. Or else.
Aerith smiled a bit at the memory. She had never seen Zack so… so admonished before, and it warmed something in her. At the sheer humanness of it.
And yet, the memory somewhat hurt as well. She wrung her hands in her lap, buried them within the pale fabric of her dress. Zack… worried her. She didn't need to Planet's guidance to sense how fragile he was, how brittle, like the slightest touch could break him completely. It had never occurred to her that Zack could be fragile, brittle, or delicate. In fact, he had always been the opposite. He had been… well, perfect. Perfect in every way. He was strong enough to fight monsters, brave enough to walk under a limitless sky and see the potential beneath it, funny enough to come out of any sort of tragedy with a hint of wisdom and a smile. In her mind, Zack had been something of a sun. Beautiful to look at from a distance, but a part of her was afraid that if she got too close, she would burn away. Burn away until there was nothing left of her but dusk and ash.
But she was not afraid of that any more. No, she was more afraid of what had made Zack so afraid, so – for lack of better word – breakable. What had he seen? What had he experienced? Did she even want to know?
"What are you thinking of?"
A voice, crisp and cool, jolted her from her thoughts. It only takes a moment to regain her composure, and she turned to Tseng, a hint of a smile on her lips. "Curious?" she teased.
"Not at all," Tseng deadpanned.
Aerith giggled at that. "I bet you aren't," she said, and glanced out the window behind her. To the jagged skyline of Midgar, bleak and cold, and the brilliant sunset behind it. At how the falling sun mingled with the grey metal and tinged it colors of red, and orange, and yellow. It hurt her heart to look at. Truth be told, she always liked the sky. She loved the way it changed colors. But every time she stood beneath it on the upper sectors, a basket of flowers dangling from her arm, she couldn't help but feel tense. Like something would swoop down and steal her away.
"Nothing," Aerith finally replied. Tseng glanced at her, startled, and it occurred to her that he hadn't actually been expecting a response. The realization warmed something within her, and she leaned her head against the window pane. Closed her eyes against its chill, and continued, "I'm not thinking of anything at all."
Thank you for reading! See you all again on Friday :) In the meantime, I'll be planning out new chapters and figured out something like a timeline. It looks like this story will continue throughout the original FF7 timeline (hopefully FF7R part 2 comes out before I get there, though its unlikely) so there will be plenty of content to come.
Until next time!
