Reminder:
"This is spoken English."
"This is spoken Czech."
This is a thought.

Previously: Anna realized that she has no idea when Radek's birthday is, though now she does. Meanwhile, Radek can no longer ignore the recon team in his future (chapter 61).


Chapter 66. Many Unhappy Returns.

It looked like another one of those days: eventful for everyone but Radek. They went offworld to do something about Iratus bugs. Or bring some piece of one back. Because Colonel Sheppard was turning into a bug?

Two people died. Two people that Radek didn't know were presumably eaten alive by the insect cousin of the Wraith. He hoped they died quickly.

This was why Radek never wanted to leave the lab. Things didn't make sense in here, no. But they made even less sense out there. In the lab, people could be erased from existence, yes, but not turned into bugs. Exotic particles could be created and destroyed in pocket universes, but no one was getting the life sucked out of them with the touch of an alien palm. Things like that just didn't happen and he wasn't looking forward to the day when that became commonplace.

He lived in a world where, at least, he could explain things. It was his job to explain things.

The world he was being inducted into was one in which things could be explained… he'd just never have the time to do so.

Because he was being inducted into that world. He was almost certain of it. Elizabeth told him to come to the conference room at thirteen-hundred hours and she wouldn't do that unless they were making some ceremony out of that chalkboard blue uniform.

He could no longer concentrate on this. Who was he kidding? He hadn't concentrated all day.

Thirty minutes until that dreaded hour. What was he going to say?

He knew himself well enough. He'd just nod. He'd do what he was told. He might even thank them, as though this wasn't the last thing on all of Atlantis he wanted. He'd survived killer viruses and… yeah. That was it. Killer viruses, hurricanes the size of Earth, and the first three months with his daughter living on Atlantis.

"Radek!" Rodney stormed into the lab and looked directly at him. Looked almost pleased. Or smug. Rodney of all people knew that Radek would be less than pleased to be placed on Lorne's team.

"Welcome back," he said quietly and hoped Rodney would leave it at that.

No such luck. "Thank you. What do you think?"

What a complicated question. He sighed. "Not now."

"Come on." Rodney said. "Haven't you always wanted something like this?"

Radek stared beyond Rodney, trying to figure out just what he meant. And why he would ever think that Radek wanted to go offworld. "What? Since—?" he sputtered. "I only went offworld twice, and one of those only because you were explicitly unavailable." He only barely counted Doranda, and the other trip predicated the most disastrously humiliating experience of his recent life.

"I don't mean to steal all the glory, trust me." Rodney slouched into a chair and turned toward one of the computers. He seemed confused about what he was doing there, probably because it wasn't his console. But Radek was using Rodney's and he wasn't about to give it up. "Going offworld is much, much harder than it looks."

"Really." Radek didn't doubt that.

"Yeah. So, uh, let me know if you want any, you know, tips."

Radek laughed. "From you?"

He shouldn't have laughed. But why not? If the stories were true, Rodney had no idea what he was doing out there. Almost every military officer on Atlantis had a cherished story about Rodney's complete inability to shoot anything he aimed at. Unless he was aiming at some distant point in the sky.

"You think it's easy?" Rodney scoffed.

"No, I think it's incredibly difficult." Too difficult for Rodney, but for some reason they kept letting him go along. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and checked the time. Minutes ticked by much faster when Rodney was doing his level best to lay the groundwork for an aneurism.

"Hm." Rodney looked around like he was trying to figure out some sort of wisdom to impart. "Well, the uniform kinda bunches up under the arms, so watch out for that."

Radek smiled on his way out the door. "Ah. Well. Thank you. That's good to know."

Rodney reclaimed his console and his lab. He could have them. Radek didn't want Lab 01 if it was accompanied by a spot on a reconnaissance team. On the other hand, he was getting the latter without the former.

He slammed his hand on the map of Atlantis, careful to hit the dot for the Central Tower.

The conference room was mostly empty when he sat in the nearest chair. Just Elizabeth and Caldwell, but Caldwell was doing his "fly on the wall" act. He worked on his tablet and sorted through papers under his left elbow from time to time. Trying to give the distinct impression that he wasn't involved here and, honestly, he wasn't.

"I heard Colonel Sheppard will recover?" he started when the silence didn't move itself.

Elizabeth looked relieved as she set aside her tablet. There was a faraway look in her eyes. Maybe she was writing condolence letters to the families of the men that died. "Yes. Unfortunately, Walker and Stevens didn't make it back."

"I heard," Radek said. First time he'd heard the names, though.

Caldwell coughed a little, but otherwise said nothing.

"It's been undecided for a long time whether Major Lorne's team needs a science team member. I recognize this is a horrible time to do it, but he would need a replacement anyway."

Radek hadn't considered that. Seemed like the perfect breeding ground for resentment, especially when Major Lorne already didn't seem to like him that much. But, in the light that there would never be a good time, this was as good as any. Radek was used to working with people who didn't like him.

Elizabeth picked up her tablet and scrolled through it. She shook her head as though she'd come to an inescapable conclusion. "You're a good fit, Radek." At least she said it like she knew how unfortunate that was. "You have practical Ancient and Wraith knowledge, you have good marks with your firearms assessments." Radek didn't know whether to be encouraged by her slight smirk or not. "And your personality evaluation doesn't lead me to believe you'll be destroying a solar system in the near future."

What does one say? "Thank you?"

"And all the other members of Major Lorne's team have the ATA gene, so he doesn't need another," she added. "You are exactly what we wanted."

Now, that was nearly insulting. He didn't say anything about it, though. "That's it then? I'm a member of Lorne's reconnaissance team? Just like that? No training, no tests?"

"Oh, there will be training," Caldwell put in. "But you'll do fine, Doctor."

Radek had no doubt he'd "do fine." He was a better shot than Rodney and could keep his cool in most situations… even those involving almost certain death. He knew when to try, when to give up, and didn't lose his head when infected with a killer virus.

This was significantly different.

What would he do under Genii weapons fire? What would he do face-to-face with a Wraith?

"Do you have any questions?" Elizabeth asked.

He had a million. What to ask first? Why not Kusanagi or Kavanagh or—hell, anyone else? Who would be doing this training? When would it be? How would this affect his other responsibilities—not only as the head of a science department, but…

Well, Elizabeth was in no position to tell him what to do about Anna.

Radek was hardly in that position.

"When will this training be?" Simple question. Concrete answer. Hopefully.

"Since Major Lorne will be doing the training…" She consulted her tablet. "Next week. Early morning."

The way she said early made Radek think that it was an hour not even coffee would help. But who wanted to drink coffee before running laps around the Central Tower catwalks? He shrugged. "And the first mission?"

"Also next week. Don't worry. Should be easy."

Wasn't that what they said about the mission to the planet with the Wraith girl? People in the Control Tower had a delusional definition of easy. "That's reassuring."

Elizabeth offered a smile that he didn't reciprocate. She took a breath. "Well, we'll have your uniform to you tomorrow. It's up to you which you wear."

"Thank you." He looked around helplessly, not wanting to ask if he could leave now or in any way look rude. He'd try his best to live up to expectations, surpass them if at all possible. It usually wasn't possible. Rodney had low expectations, and was never impressed, even when work was truly exceptional.

He almost wanted to tell her not to bother with the chalkboard blue. He was keeping his khakis. Lest Lorne ever forget Radek was an Atlantis scientist first.

He smiled a little and stood. "I'll get back to work, then. Next week is looking busy."

Elizabeth smiled, looking genuinely hopeful that he wasn't taking this as badly as she might have imagined. Don't react. He could sort it out later. After training, probably, and dying of a heart attack because he was actually woefully out of shape. He hadn't been shaping expectations from the beginning like Rodney… perhaps there was a benefit to outspoken hypochondria. If everyone thought there was something wrong with you, even if just psychological, they might expect less.

Radek reveled in his average genius maybe a bit too much.

But maybe not average. He always thought he was just as good as Rodney, but he never knew if that was true. Not in practice. Rodney was under constant pressure in the field to stay alive. Would Radek do as well? Would Radek abandon ship, as it were, as soon as things got bad? He wanted to think he'd stay, keep working, try to save everyone with little care for his own wellbeing. He wanted to save lives and he'd destroy solar systems if that was what it took. Just… not like Rodney.

Radek took a deep breath. So that was that. No second guessing, no asking questions. Just, "Your flak jacket, Atlantis reconnaissance team blues, and get used to running with your weight plus seventy or so kilos." Little to no ceremony, and he joined the unfortunate few.

More unfortunate today than usual.

Radek hesitated outside the conference room. Elizabeth said she'd meet him for dinner later, which meant he probably had an hour and a half to two to kill. The control room across the way was mostly empty, except Major Lorne sat in one of the chairs. Just looking at the Stargate.

Radek crossed the room, stepping up the stairs to the Control Room. "Hello, Major."

Major Lorne glanced over his shoulder to see who was coming before returning his gaze to the Stargate immediately. "I assume they gave you the news?"

"Yes."

Major Lorne cracked his knuckles, one at a time, and nodded. "Well," he said without a hint of congratulations. "Welcome to the team, Doc."

It seemed too ironic to thank him for that, so Radek didn't. "I was sorry to hear about Stevens and Walker." Even though he didn't even know they had names just a few hours ago.

The major heaved a sigh, set his jaw with a grimace. "Yeah." Suddenly, Lorne leaned forward, rubbing the creases from his forehead. "Damnit," he hissed.

Radek didn't know what to say, so he didn't. As far as he knew, Walker and Stevens' bodies hadn't been recovered. Radek could only think of a handful of worse ways to go. He could only think of a handful of worse things to have on one's conscience.

"I should be grateful," Lorne said a second later. "At least you aren't McKay."

Radek chuckled. "Yeah, I remind myself of this whenever things are bad."

To his surprise, Lorne laughed, too.

Radek didn't want to make any assumptions, but maybe he and Major Lorne would get along, after all.

#

Anna glanced up when the door from Radek's room slid open. Radek wandered in, looking like he'd just run a marathon, but he'd actually just taken a shower. But that was only after probably running a marathon, training with Major Lorne. He looked up toward where she was sitting in front of the window.

She smiled apologetically. "How was the first day?"

His first day of training. His first mission was in four days. It was apparently going to be very boring, just to let him "get his feet wet," as Elizabeth put it. In Radek's mind, Anna didn't doubt it more resembled patting a snake with bare feet.

Something about a meet-and-greet with friends of Teyla's that Atlantis had already made contact with. Periodically, they would check up on their friends and trade with them, just to keep relations welcoming. The culture seemed to revolve around borrowing and gift-giving, very open and friendly as long as they brought something shiny to give.

"You know… it wasn't awful."

Anna didn't know how to take that. His tone said it was terrible, but he sounded slightly surprised. The way he moved said he had muscles hurting he didn't know he had. His head bowed in an attitude of embarrassment as he sank down onto the couch. He winced as he picked his feet up to prop them on the table in front of him.

"I'm glad?" she said finally. "So… what's wrong?"

"I just have a lot of work to do."

She set aside her book and watched him. He turned his face toward the ceiling and closed his eyes. "What kind of work?" she asked. "Just the running and jumping stuff?"

He picked his head up a little, smiled at her description of the physical training. "Mostly. I also doubt my ability to ever handle a gun with any proficiency. I doubt I'll ever need it. But if I don't practice, I will need it." He slid his feet back off the table and they fell to the floor like he had no strength left. "Ah, which reminds me, I should probably be practicing. I have so much catching up to do."

"I don't think Major Lorne expects you to be a marine," Anna offered.

Radek shot her a glance. Anna wasn't sure what it meant, but he didn't look pleased.

"It's true," he said finally. "But he expects me to not be a nuisance, either." He picked himself up from the couch and looked around. "Right. The range. Um. Where is it?"

Anna gave him a small smile and went to stand next to him. "I'll come with you."

He shrugged like that wasn't the worst idea. The last thing he probably wanted was to get lost on the way to the firing range. He might eventually have no choice than to just lie down on a bench and hope someone dragged his body back to his quarters or the infirmary… whichever was most convenient.

There were plenty of voices at the firing range this morning, which wasn't all that unusual. The Atlantis reconnaissance teams took cycles on weekdays to keep their physical condition in top shape and their shooting in pristine form. Major Lorne's team was here, along with the seventh reconnaissance team. Anna didn't know any of their names. There were still three tables and target clips open.

Radek stood in the doorway for a moment, looking lost. He found himself again quickly, and started for the gun locker.

Major Lorne hadn't missed his sudden appearance. "Hey, Doc, training's over."

"I know," Radek answered. "But there is always practice."

Radek picked out one of the training handguns. Sheppard told Anna it was basically a weighted BB-gun, but he never used them because it didn't have the same firepower, and so it didn't have the same kick-back. It was fine for recertifying scientists, but that was about it.

"Oh." Major Lorne nodded, apparently trying to hold back a genuine laugh. The rest of his team seemed amused, too.

Anna shrank at the realization that they had no respect for him. They were laughing, weren't they? Even if it wasn't out loud.

"You must be Anna."

Anna nodded, and went to the locker next to Radek. Whatever else they must have been thinking, they were right. Seeing Radek in the shooting range was so out of place, it could have easily been funny. It barely felt right to see him handling the training handgun. It didn't feel right to ask Radek if she could shoot, too. She spun, locking Major Lorne in her gaze with a pleasant smile.

"Can I shoot, too? Colonel Sheppard's been teaching me," she said.

Major Lorne frowned, obviously not considering this question a possibility. Or, maybe, a question she shouldn't have asked. Anna only knew that she shouldn't use any weapons in here without permission… and Radek didn't seem qualified to give that permission.

"Uh. Sure," Major Lorne said uncertainly.

She thanked him and spun back around, nudging Radek with her arm as she picked up one of the handguns and a box of bullets. "Let's play a game."

"A game." Radek didn't sound enthused. "With guns. Anna, you worry me."

She laughed, but said, "Yeah, a game." Anna went to the first open table, the one next to Major Lorne, and loaded the clip. "Makes practice more fun. It's not fair to play with Ronon when he's using his gun, though. He just blows the whole target away and you can't tell what he hit."

"Um… yeah…" Radek sounded like he had no idea what else to say.

"Okay. Here's the game. We shoot at our targets together on mark. After I empty my clip, we count how many points we get by how close we are to the center."

"Is this retaliation for that chess game?" Radek asked. Still, he was smiling a little. It was better than just blindly lining up shot after shot, anyway.

Anna smirked. "Maybe." She clipped the target to the cord and sent it out to the other end of the range. "Připraveni?"

Radek sighed and sent out his own target. Put his goggles on. Earplugs.

Anna rolled her eyes. "Teď?" *

Radek nodded and stood straight, raising his gun. He looked so… awkward. Anna supposed she could help with that. At least fix his stance a little. Maybe later, though. Major Lorne and the others were watching. Pretending they weren't. This wasn't the time for Anna to correct him.

"Okay."

They both fired. Anna could see her shot went off perfectly, just like she'd aimed. She glanced immediately at Radek's target. He was in the second ring from the outside, which was only one point. She was in the fourth ring, only one ring away from center, three points.

"Not bad," she offered. Better than her first try, anyway. "That would be one point for you, and three for me. But I think it's not fair to start right off, so that's the practice round. Now you call it."

Radek sighed and raised his gun. "Teď."

Anna fired again. "You don't have to sound so enthusiastic," she mumbled. But she couldn't help but smile when she saw this time he had three points, too.

"I'll try to restrain myself." He pointed at his target. "Better though."

"Much. You'll be hitting the center every time before the game is done." She checked the clock on the desk next to the weapons locker. "You're already good at this, you know."

Radek was already much better at shooting than Anna when she started, and she couldn't figure out how. Military service was compulsory when he was eighteen, but it was waived since he had much better things to do with his time. The science team had to maintain certain certifications with firearms, but they never had to actually use the weapons except for their biannual test.

Major Lorne and his team had gone back to their own practice. She was probably imagining it when she thought she saw Major Lorne glance in their direction a few times. She didn't know why.

The game was over and, like Anna predicted, Radek started hitting the center relatively quickly. He didn't beat her in points, but he was close enough to call it a win. At least in Anna's eyes. Anna took him through how to clean the gun.

Major Lorne's team split up to put their guns away and they all left separately. By that time, it was lunch and everyone was leaving the shooting range. Major Lorne stayed back.

"I didn't expect dedication like that, Doc," he said tentatively. "I don't think any of the other scientists put in any extra work. At least, not that I see."

Anna smiled. If you couldn't be good, at least be dedicated.

"It helps to have someone to practice with," Radek said.

Major Lorne just smiled. "Yeah, I guess." Maybe he said something like "have a good day" or "see you tomorrow." He left pretty quickly after that.

Anna followed Radek to the mess hall. "I'll practice with you all the time, if you want," she offered as they picked up their tacos, tortilla chips, and tiny little bowls of salsa. Taco Monday?

"That is very generous," Radek said.

Anna shrugged. It wasn't really generous. It was an opportunity to do something with him except work on Doctor McKay's science problems and eat lunch. "Well," she sighed as they sat down at the long table together. She spied Major Lorne sitting at a table by himself, eating a sandwich and apparently contemplating the wall.

She looked back at Radek with hardly another thought for it. "What is family for?"


Czech Things

* Připravení = Ready / Teď = Now

~many thanks to payaxy for setting me straight about some mixed-up words


Next time: Things are happening. I'm not sure if it's good or not.