A/N

Did I worry all of you? Were you afraid that I was gone forever? No, nothing like that, I'm not one to abandon something I've started so unceremoniously.

Unfortunately, life tends to get in the way of hobbies - hence why I've been radio silent for the last few weeks. I'm working six days a week and I've hardly had any time to write; sometimes you need to cut something loose if it means keeping your sanity. I enjoy writing, I do, but there comes a point where writing begins to feel more like an obligation than a hobby.

Rest assured though, I am back and will try to stick to the usual weekly upload schedule. Today's chapter is "short-ish", but there's only so much I can squeeze into a chapter before it starts to feel bloated.

Anyways...

Chapter 56…

Ashley couldn't remember that last time that she had been this lazy…

Hospital visits didn't really count, as Ashley was confined to her bed during her stays. No, but this was apathy of a completely different sort…

The tousled sheets of her bed were all bunched up and pressed uncomfortably against the small of her back. Yet Ashley felt no compulsion to shift her body and fix it; nor did she really feel any care. Her left left leg hung limply off the side of the bed, her heel very gently tapping against the wooden floorboards below. Ashley's eyes were stuck facing upwards, gently scanning the dark roof of her room.

Her left arm, like her leg, was hanging off of the bed. The bandages on her hand occasionally scraped against the rough floor; but a more noticeable sensation was the gentle pressure of the card being squeezed between her fingers.

She was a lazy squatter now…

… how things had changed.

Ashley wasn't sure if she was still allowed to sleep in the inn. The owner had been killed in the attack - technically speaking it wasn't even a business anymore. Ashley's dark, dank little room hadn't been properly cleaned or aired out in weeks.

It sort of reminded her of her temporary room on the IMC Medusa. The inn was considerably nicer, unlike the utilitarian little broom closet on that particular ship - her one place of respite and isolation during her stay with the IMC.

She rolled over in her sweaty, unchanged covers, pulling her hanging arm and leg onto the bed. The small card was still clenched between her fingers, but the surprisingly durable plastic that the chip was made from did not bend.

"ANGEL CITY ELITES"

The words were emblazoned on the card in bright grey font. Underneath the lettering sat a giant spade - the ones seen on a playing card - adorned with two crimson wings and featuring the letter "A" in it's center. Red markings adorned the symbols and fonts.

Recruitment… what a twist of events the last few days had turned out to be. Ashley should have expected the offer to come through at some point. Mercenary groups were always looking for new talent; and those on the side of the Frontier Militia were no exception.

It was difficult to hold the card in her bandaged fingers. So Ashley released the small plastic chip, allowing it to flit gently onto the ruffles and folds of her stale sheets. There it settled on a slight angle, the image of the spade still invading Ashley's vision.

Ashley considered sleeping but knew that she couldn't. The room was dark and cool - reasonably comfortable - but the silence was deafening. Simply by closing her eyes the dark haired woman could sense it - the thump of her heart and movement of her diaphragm.

But what other alternative was there? Outside? With it's overbearing warmth, the townspeople - who true to Dima's word - were giving her strange looks?

Ashley rolled over in bed again, not wanting the image of the spade to haunt her any longer. Now turned over, Ashley's vision was craned towards the closed door of her room.

The distance appeared impossibly long in the low light of the room. There was a large stain on the wooden floorboards in front of the door - wide reaching and dark red. Ashley hated the bloodstain, there was a sticky sensation whenever the soles of her boots pressed down onto it.

In a long moment… the silence and darkness no longer felt comforting. Ashley had the strangest sensation come over her - the feeling that she was being watched by something. She was alone, of course, but the shadowy corners of the room hid something unseen to her.

Frowning to herself, Ashley slipped on her clothes and tucked the business card into the breast pocket of her jumpsuit. She left in a hurry, stepping over the old bloodstain and closing the door behind her.

The silence and darkness were no longer comforting… and she feared what hid within them…


She didn't stay within Okraina's limits for long…

There were too many people - people that Ashley didn't want to have to deal with. The townsfolk, who whispered about her in a language she couldn't understand; and then the soldiers, who gave her curious looks as they wandered around in their green and yellow uniforms, R-201 rifles hanging loosely from their hands.

So many people… so many eyes… it turned Ashley's stomach in knots…

The dark haired woman stuck to the alleys and footpaths until she was out of town entirely. She now found herself wandering through the open fields; the sun beat down on her, and her legs were tickled by the sensations of Antheia's blooming wildflowers. Her mind was not present on the trip, her awareness left behind in the dark room of Okraina's inn. Instead, her legs moved… seemingly of their own accord…

Ashley was carried by her legs all the way up a hill, where she finally sat down to rest. Antheia's sun hung overhead, and the dense thickets of woodland to Ashley's back shielded her from the most oppressive of the star's rays.

In front of the dark haired woman sprawled one of the many valleys that surrounded Okraina. The fields were a patchwork mixture of tilled farmland and wild, unkempt flowerbeds. Hills and outcroppings raised and lowered in the valley, a ruffled appearance similar to the tousled sheets of a bed. In the middle of it all, Okraina's lazy river snaked through the low lying areas; it's watery surface glittered a bright blue in the midday sunlight - a colour so rich that it put the skies to shame.

Antheia truly was a beautiful planet. One massive garden… it's wildlands had that touch of chaotic beauty that only nature could create.

Ashley pulled her legs close to her chest and looped her bandaged hands around her knees. A dark wisp of hair fell in front of her face, and Ashley realized in an instant that several strands had come loose from her ponytail. Pausing for a moment, the woman reached up and undid the tail; for the first time in a long time, Ashley did not have her hair up.

The long dark strands tickled her ears and neck… it was a strange sensation to her; she had not felt it in a very long time...

She looked upon the vista again…

Why would she ever want to leave this place? It's blooming valleys, it's pleasant climate, it's fertile soils, it's glittering rivers… paradise…

Ashley felt the weight of the business card in her breast pocket. Growling to herself, the woman worked her fingers into the compartment and withdrew the card.

"ANGEL CITY ELITES"

What a stupid name…

Placing her fingers on either side of the card… Ashley considered tearing it in half…

It wouldn't be impossible… plastic could be snapped and weakened if enough force was applied…

This wasn't just a business card, it was a doorway, an opportunity. In her hands rested the culmination of ten years of her life; tens years of strife, struggle, and violence. Violence enacted for her own personal gain.

And yet… something was stopping her…

What was stopping her? What was preventing her from breaking the cycle?

In some strange way, the business card laying gently in her hands reminded her of a pistol. Deadly, and easy to abuse… something that needed to be respected…

"So, why are you here then?"

Ashley frowned, her lips curling tightly at the edges.

"You want to know what I think? I think… that deep, deep down you know that this job is the only thing you're good at…"

The voice echoed, as if from long ago. There was a spiteful edge to it… and edge that made the delicate little accent all the more noticeable…

Ashley curled her hands into the grass, tearing out fistfuls of reeds… she hated that delicate accent, and the woman it belonged to...

"You can't live normally… you can't leave this life behind…"

She had tried… she had tried…

An honest life, repairing and operating a loader titan in service of a small frontier town. A place where she could put down her roots and then be left alone - forgotten by the Frontier and all the crimes of her past.

But that wasn't really possible anymore… was it?

A town that had been soaked in blood… much of which had been spilled by Ashley herself. Townsfolk that didn't look at her the same way… soldiers who were suspicious…

Perhaps Okraina could never be her home now. Like the bloodstain in her room, it was a spot that would never be clean again, no matter how much she scrubbed… scrubbed until blood from the wounds on her fingers seeped through her bandages...

Ashley abruptly stood up, shoving the business card back into her pocket. She marched away from her spot and stormed down the hill, her black hair whipping behind her.

Her intention had been to return to the dark little room of the inn… but something caught her eye…

Something large, sitting on the outskirts of one of the tilled fields…

Ashley's eyes softened as her gaze fell upon the tree stump. The oaken body it had once supported was long gone - either rotted with time or seized by Okraina's townspeople for lumber.

The woman ran her bandaged hands across the gnarled wood. She stood on her toes and then peered into the remains of the stump, noting the hollow interior. It was just wide enough to fit a person - assuming that they were in a fetal position...

"Last week some of the workers found you outside of town. You were curled up in a hollowed out tree stump and acting quite deranged…"

Here… of all places? What strange things the human mind could concoct when under the influence…

Ashley didn't climb into the stump… what would be the point of that? Instead, she removed her hands and leaned against the long forgotten roots.

Cain had said something to her once when they were discussing his programming. The titan had compared his protocols to strings… binds which dictated his every move and thought; and try as he might, there was no way to circumvent that.

How had the titan justified saving her? A loop in his programming? Or perhaps just a blindspot the technicians who had made him forgot to cover up?

How did it feel, she wondered, watching as his pilot flew off, her fate uncertain? Did he feel pain, fear, regret… when the broadsword sheared through his optic…?

Ashley looked down upon the stump once again, at it's hollow interior. From what little she remembered from her river water induced haze… she remembered that Cain had been one of the few sources of comfort - a place to hide.

Perhaps Ashley was covered in her own strings. An upbringing that she looked back on with regret. Her many crimes while under contract with the IMC. Abandoning her teammates, watching as they and everyone else on Demeter was wiped out in one big flash of light…

Ashley frowned and crawled into the stump. It took some maneuvering, but she managed to settle herself inside - pulling her knees up to her chin so that she could fit.

It was quiet inside… and the stump's angle meant that Ashley was spared from the heat of the sun. If she closed her eyes and concentrated… she could imagine that she was inside the insulated cockpit of a titan...

She pulled out the business card again…

"ANGEL CITY ELITES"

One day, the cycle would be broken...

Maybe she wasn't done playing soldier… not just yet…