Ben paced the inside of his cell. It wouldn't be long now, between whether or not Rey had been serious about leaving-if her medically intoxicated state hadn't just been what she'd thought a strange fever dream-or if the resistance would stop by to escort him off planet. Maybe even that was a mere excuse to shoot him down when he was out of sight, and finish what they started.

He only hoped that Rey was serious. With her at his side, maybe he would finally be making a step in the right direction.

Another step.

He decided that following her back to the resistance didn't count.

But he would have an approximation of happiness, some semblance of peace in a new start somewhere. Away from the eyes of the resistance, away from anyone that would know him as Kylo Ren. Maybe he could find work using his abilities for something worthwhile. Maybe he could finally tell Rey…

Rey.

He halted, fists unclenching at his sides as he exhaled a breath. She would be there, and that gave him some semblance of peace, guiding him like a light throuh the dark that seemed hellbent on snuffing what little part of Ben Solo he held out again. In truth, he mostly anticipated never being in such a small enclosed space again, had made a promise that he wouldn't.

That was enough to calm his jumbled nerves, get him to look ahead rather than behind, and he breathed and thought and wondered where that small sliver of his hesitation remained.

It was the only connection he had to his parents, where his future was planned originally, and he didn't exactly know what kind of life he could make for himself out there. Ben couldn't support both of them, didn't know if she would be safe out there and no doubt her face and name were known to enough interested parties. First Order sympathizers, thieves, killers…

He grimaced.

He had the luxury of others thinking he was dead.

And he was, but that same thing was arching to graze against the part of him that was still dark, that clung to what had existed of him before, trying to bring him back out. Ben no longer sensed conflict in him, but something that had been taped down and smothered, trying to climb out and trade him places. It was subdued by the light for now, as little a part of him as that was, but he was determined to keep it under, even if every part of him yearned against it.

Ben shook his head. Rey was coming, her mind reeling, much less level than him who had accepted his fate from the start-before they had even made it to Exogol. As soon as she'd stepped foot through the durasteel door, R2 beeped curiously beside her, a gesture of which she ignored. She was already motioning him out, tears prickling the corners of her eyes and noticeably grappling for some form of control. "Let's go."

There was no care for hesitation, and she looked so sure despite everything, and his heart for the moment was in the same place. Rey had spoken the previous night of her yearning to leave, to start over with him, to be free of the judgment that remained within the resistance. It'd been her home once, unlike him, and yet because of him, she was so sure in leaving it.

He followed her out without protest, his saber passed into the palm of his hand where he held it in a white-knucked grip.

The halls of the Tantive were silent, fluorescent lights passing above them in a blur. Despite their rushed pace, Ben had to maintain a careful stride in order not to tread over the back of her heels. R2 rolled at their side, flashing a series of beeps and whistles that echoed throughout the hall in warning.

Rey shushed him. "Be quiet, R2." She hissed. "I don't care."

R2 whistled low.

"I am not being harsh." She answered. "I'm not going to argue. If you want to tell Poe, then do it but I am not going back."

R2 beeped, his wheels working double time to push himself in front of Rey who was forced to a stop. Ben came to an abrupt halt just behind her, towering.

"Move out of the way R2." Rey hissed. "You're very small; I can probably step over you if I wanted."

The droid whistled, turning its mechanical head back and forth.

"Move," Rey whispered. "This is your last warning."

"Rey-" Ben started, their thread cracking like a whip, demanding and insistent, tugging harder at one side, tugging him.

The loud resounding roar echoing through the ship's hallways interrupted what he had been about to say.

A cry of outrage that sent shivers up his spine, enough of a push for Rey to shove herself at his front, holding up her hands, her saber in one, deactivated but thumbing the activation switch.

"Chewie!" She acknowledged the Wookie as he barreled down the main corridor. Seeing his father's oldest friend gripped at his heart, shoved him back into memories he had long since buried.

Chewie had been there when Ben Solo was born, when his father had insisted on calling him Han Jr. before his mother had settled on Ben. One of the few times he had seen Luke smile was when they recounted the story; he had been fond of it.

He had been there when Ben called Leia mom for the first time, had laughed at how jealous Han had been when dad hadn't been his first words; he'd been there when he'd referred to Chewie as an uncle, had rode on his shoulders while they ran around the resistance base pretending to take flight.

Through all of the strange creatures Ben had brought home, when he had helped clean the ship after an incident when a particular one he'd found ripped through and he'd been afraid of his parent's scolding. He let Ben play on the falcon, taught him the basics of flight controls and agreed to convince Han to teach him how to fly, no matter how much they had been against it at the time.

He hadn't been too angry when Ben had accidentally shot him with a blaster, and Ben also never learned to play Dejarik correctly because the wookie always let him win.

Chewie had been there when his parents hadn't, had hugged him through his childish nightmares, when he was scared of himself and dreaming of a dark future, comforted him when his parents hadn't been home, held him when the voices didn't let him sleep.

When Ben learned how strong he was with the force, when his parents spoke of their fear of him, how his bad temper wouldn't let him control it.

Chewie was there when they sent Ben away and didn't come back.

And he was there when Kylo Ren killed his best friend, and for his mother to cry, when Luke became one with the force and still held hope that Ben would come back to them no matter how much he probably believed that he wouldn't.

Ben had, and he stood there now looking his outraged uncle in the eyes trying not to flinch back with the memory of the bridge. Deft fingers wrapped around Rey's bicep and tugged her out of the way. He faced him, hands held out to his sides in a show of truce.

"Chewie-"

A furry paw collided hard with the side of his face, hard enough to snap his head sideways. While disorienting, he winced and rubbed a hand across his jaw and looked up.

"Chewie!" Rey gasped.

"I deserved that." Ben noted as Chewie erupted into a series of growls and grunts.

"I deserve that too."

Another harsh growl.

"I know what I did." The memory had been a constant plague on his mind since it had happened, had been a flickering point in the rising of his own internal conflict. "Everything that I did."

I want to be free of this pain.

I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I have the strength to do it.

"But I can't atone for it. There is nothing that I could do, but I am asking for you to at least let me try."

Gentle fingers wrapped around his arm, and he could see Rey just outside of his peripherals, a gesture of comfort as her feet scuffed across the ground to move closer.

He flinched but didn't pull away.

"We have to go." She urged softly, eyes flicking to Chewbacca who leveled the two of them with a stare, R2 standing just on the other side, whistling low. "Chewie, we're taking the Falcon."

Chewbacca growled.

"It is the only ship that we have." Rey pointed out. "Luke's fighter did not survive the trip back. You can come, but either way we are taking that ship. We will go through you too, and honestly I thought I killed you once and I'd rather not repeat it."

Chewbacca looked between them, huffed a grumble of defeat, and only with great reluctance did he motion R2 aside, the droid obeying with a series of curious clicks and whistles.

"Thank you." She murmured, her feet carrying her further down the corridor.

R2 and Chewbacca remained on their heels as they stepped out of the Tantive onto the rocky crags of Crait, sun high in the sky making it muggy and hot, one wide ray heating up the rocks under their feet and coating them with sweat. It seeped through the abhorrent green uniform he had been forced to wear, but he could only imagine how much worse it would be if he had been in his black robes.

The resistance uniforms had that going for them at least.

Ben squinted against the light, but he couldn't stop to take it in, nor the fresh air, the freedom. Instead, his steps remained in tow with Rey's, moving urgently toward the Falcon. Neither looked behind them, didn't entertain what they may have been leaving behind-what Rey may have been leaving behind. He would be escorted off planet either way, but the brief memories he had of the Resistance were few that he couldn't see now.

He stopped. There was another presence there, more prodding, more insistent, stubborn. One that he knew all too well when she had carelessly barged into Rey's room and asked them not to be doing anything inappropriate. Not that they had been.

And Rey felt it too, as she stopped, whipped around with wide eyes as the voice of her friend rang out.

"Rey, stop!"

Rose stood there-noticeably alone-her eyes fixated on Rey, a flickering insistence in them pleading. Bewildered, as if her entire world had come crashing down, non-understanding, unwilling to accept the hand that she'd been dealt. "Stay."

"Don't get in the way." Rey warned. "If Poe is exiling Ben, then where he goes, I go too."

"You don't do this!" Rose insisted. "Rey, your place is with the resistance. We can't do this without you."

"So was Ben's, and Poe kicked him out despite everything." She thumbed the ignition switch, the blade whirring to life with its glowing light. "I will go through you if I have to." Her voice dropped low, harboring the same malice aboard the remnants of the Death Star. "Go. Back."

"No."

"Go. Back."

"Come. Home."

"It's not my home." Rey spat with utter defiance. "Not anymore. You would all do well to remember that when Finn returns." She backed up, shoving against Ben's arms, but he didn't budge despite her ushering him backward.

"Make the right choice."

"This is the right choice."

"You'll be marking yourself as a fugitive."

"So be it." Rey stiffened and lifted her weapon, the line on the horizon by the cave growing wider, darker with the outline of bodies, their hazy blotches through the sun's heat wave becoming clearer.

The resistance was coming.

Ben came to stand at her side. If there was any other chance to go against the resistance again, it may as well have been then. He thumbed the ignition switch as his own saber thrummed to light, held out his hand and tuned into the force.

Rose didn't see them, holding up her hands and still begging incessantly for her to come home.

The blasters smoked with the sudden gunfire, R2's screeching piercing his ears, Rose turning to look over her shoulder as Rey screamed at her to move out of the way. Everything moved in slow motion, a wave of different variations of light barreling across the crags toward them.

With one quick flicker of his hand, Ben channeled into the force, a sharp wave throwing itself into Rose's side and sending her barreling across the cracks, holding her down to prevent catching a stray blast in the back. It meant he had one hand to use, but he wouldn't fight to kill.

Ben would fight to run. "Let's go, Rey."

She didn't budge.

"Rey," He said, more sharply.

"They'll follow." Her voice laced with frustration, a sharpness very unlike her. The thread between them crackled and spat, and tugged through her side more violently, opening up something darker, something he couldn't bear to look into.

"What?"

"I said they'll follow."

She threw her hand up, a crackling in the sky rumbled like thunder and shook the ground beneath their feet. A blinding light flashed, and Ben threw up his hand to shield himself from it, the deafening thrum of electricity barreling toward the ground at the running resistance fighters. The force held on Rose released as she scrambled to her feet, Ben throwing his hand skyward, willing the force to come to his aid.

It obeyed, a large shove of energy intercepting the lightning and careening it into the cave. A loud resounding crash and a cloud of smoke billowed in the air, remnants of rock and clay sliding down the cave's foundation.

Ben breathed as he stumbled back, his heart thrumming in his chest, the adrenaline roaring in his ears.

What was she doing?

The force bended equally to Rey's will as it kicked up sand and rock, a blast wave erupted in front of them, whipping their hair and clothes back in one abrupt push, shoving old allies out from under their feet. One in particular rolled over, head bashing against a stone as he cried out, grasping the base of his skull.

Ben watched with a sense of bewilderment, bafflement, disbelief.

But he didn't have time to process it. Rey grabbed his hand and bolted the remaining distance for the Falcon. They passed the threshold as the door sighed open, Ben looking over his shoulder to catch Chewie and R2, outside, watching them. R2's lights were flickering left and right in a series of colors, but his eyes remained on Chewie who offered him nothing more than a nod that he returned pressing the hatch button as the door sighed shut in front of him.

When Ben turned and maneuvered after Rey-who wasted no time in making a break for the cockpit-he took in the surroundings of the Falcon.

The old ship hadn't changed, if not more run down than it had been before. It creaked underneath every rushed step that he made through the hall toward the cockpit, Rey several paces in front and already throwing herself in the pilot's seat. Her hands flew over the switches, and he found himself in a momentary pause.

Pads of his fingertips brushed against the walls, and for a moment he reminisced in a time when the ship had been promised to him, when Han had taught him for the first time, every moment spent with Chewie on the ship's maintenance, his mother commenting numerous times of their need for a new one.

It could never be replaced of course, but it had almost become an inside joke amongst his family. One of the few things that they could all share together.

One of the few things they had.

"Ben, come on let's go!" Rey waved sporadically to the co-pilot's seat and with a nod, he obeyed.

His back slumped against the chair's rough exterior, grasping for the controls and thumbing buttons as the ship rumbled to life. It trembled and quaked with strain, but it was levitating, pumping more furiously to remain airborne, but soon enough they were barreling toward the atmosphere, Crait's scenery passing by in a blur, replaced instead by the vastness of space with various different stars and surrounding planets.

In the pilot's seat, Rey slumped back as well, running a hand down her face with a soft hum.

As much as he wanted to shake it, he couldn't. What she had thought of doing, what she'd almost done. That dark tug on the thread was one he knew too well, one he didn't think he would ever see on the other side. Rey's light had become something he was so used to looking into, one that blinded him when he was feeling lost.

Never once had he entertained looking into the opposite.

"Rey."

"What?" She turned her head to look at him, seemingly back to normal, or as normal as one could be in their situation, he guessed.

"What happened on Crait. What were you expecting to do?"

Contemplation marked her features, straightening in the pilot's seat with a huff. "I was trying to scare them. I was hoping that they would run away."

"You nearly hit them."

Rey's lips parted, and worked several explanations in her mouth that didn't quite come through, eyelids fluttering as she seemingly came up with nothing. Nothing but dismissal. "I don't want to talk about this now. I was frustrated, and angry and I just wanted us to be left alone. If you can spare this conversation for when we exit the ship, it will be most appreciated." The pilot's seat spun away, and he heard her back hit the seat again as she absently thumbed the different controls.

She left them in silence.

Ben did leave it for now, but the possibility still scratched at the back of his mind, yearned him to entertain the possibility. He turned his head to look out the window, at a scenery that he had seen so many times before in his travels. Before, he had never taken the time to appreciate it, the openness, that façade of freedom, opening up a whole world of possibilities that echoed a life somewhere for Ben Solo.

He did so now, reveled in it, appreciated that he could look without being in the cramped confines of a star fighter.

"Naboo." He said.

"What?" Rey leaned back and peeked out from behind the pilot's seat, furrowing her brows.

"That's where we agreed. My grandmother was from there. It's vibrant. There's a lot of seas, a lot of grasslands." Lips cocked back into the barest trace of a half smile he added. "And not a lot of sand. Not like Tattooine or Jakku. We could go there, when things settle down."

And for the first time that day, he saw Rey smile. An actual genuine smile that did not echo with the façade of trying to offer comfort or to pull light into the otherwise rough situation they had been plagued with the last few days. Rather, it was something more her, completely absent of whatever part of her he had seen back on Crait. The part of her that reminded him that they were two complete opposites, barreling toward whatever end.

For a fleeting moment, Ben believed that he had misunderstood, saw a possibility rather than a truth.

Ben had also been fooled before, and with the subtlest of smiles that didn't quite reach his eyes, he prepped the falcon for takeoff.