Elves

"How can a table be feminine or masculine? It's just a table."

LeBeau sighed. He'd rather do anything than teach these philistines rudimentary French. "I really don't know, Barnes," he groaned through clenched teeth. "I'm a chef, not a linguistics professor. Furthermore, English makes no sense."

"Hey." Newkirk stood up, chin out. "Watch it."

LeBeau spun around. "You add -s to make words plural, except for exceptions. Like 'feet.' There are crazier exceptions! The wooden elf up there? What if there were two? Shouldn't it be 'elfs'? No. It's 'elves.' On 'shelves.' "

Vindicated, LeBeau announced, "Your lesson, c'est fini."


a/n: Thank you Abracadebra for your assistance in tightening this up!