Ahsoka's Private Journal
*sigh* "The last few days... kriff, is it almost a week? I've lost track..."
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"It's been...rough, to say the least. I-It started on Orron, Wraith and I had another argument. He got really angry... and I guess I did too. Things seemed to keep going south from that point onwards..."
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"And then I stabbed him. Not on purpose, mind you, it just sorta... happened. I-I didn't know what to do, I got scared and I froze so I just... ran. I don't even know if he's still alive. He probably is, though.
"But... then it got worse."
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"A new Separatist super cruiser destroyed Master Plo's ship... and killed him in the process."
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"I've... never felt something so horrible as sensing someone in the Force and then losing them the next. It was like he was there one moment and gone the next, just a... a-a hole left behind where I used to sense him. Like a bridge had been half-destroyed and there was nothing on the other side of it.
"I... I couldn't help myself. I couldn't be stoic and detached, I... Master Plo wasn't just another Master, he was my friend. He found and me and brought me. to the Temple, without him I wouldn't be who I am today.
"I spent days mourning him, just lost in my grief. But... then someone came to talk. Trilla Suduri, a friend of Xur's. She helped me come to terms with my grief, helped me understand... It was... nice to just talk about things. I feel a little better now... but... Master Plo is still gone."
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"I hope you're at peace, Master Plo."
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*sigh* "It's been one thing after another, really. Now that Master Plo's gone, I don't feel like doing much right now... especially when it comes to my other problem. What am I supposed to say to Wraith anyway? Hell, why should I even say anything? I don't love him, not after what he's done. I mean, think about it: what he did to Apex Company, what he did to the Bonteri family, what he's done to Rex and what he did Torrent Company, what he's done across the galaxy! I shoud've known better than to fall for him. After all, just look at reality: we're on opposite sides! He's... H-He's the... the enemy..."
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"He's the e... e-enemy. I'm supposed to want him dead. B-But..."
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*sniff* "Why do I feel this... immeasurable pain in my heart every time I try to convince myself I don't love him?"
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"Why... do I still crave his touch? Why do I miss his smile? Why do I feel like crying every time I remember what I did to him on Orron? Why did I want it to be him, not Trilla, to be there for me when Master Plo died?"
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"I'm supposed to have nothing to do with him... but why do I just know that I still love him?"
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End of Entry
