Hi everyone ! December sure flew by quickly, but it's also been a bit harder to get into writing these days. I'm not calling it a writer's block, maybe just, you know, the lowest point of the wave. Anyway, back on track and I hope you'll like this chapter ! Thank you all for your comments, new and long-time readers !
I hope you had a lovely Chirstmas, if it's something you celebrate, or that you at least get to spend quality times with your loved ones for the end of the year. You are great, you are wonderful and unique people, and you deserve to be loved.
On with the story...
CHAPTER 76
Varian wasn't sure he wanted to wake up from what had been a peaceful sleep of recovery. Refusing to crack his eyes open, he gradually became aware of the unpredictable sounds of crackling fire and the softness of the sheets covering him. His pillow felt plump and welcoming, like his head just belonged there and was never meant to leave it. An inviting smell was lingering in the air – stew, maybe ?
Clatter came suddenly, startling, irritating. It came with an audible gasp and then the turmoil ended as quickly as it started with one last clang.
No… Just… just let me sleep, just a little more.
It was too late, and he knew it. With a groan he was unable to repress, Varian stirred and rolled onto his side. It felt so nice and warm, too bad he was tugged awake this way.
Something small connected with his cheek, both soft and spiky. Heavy eyelids opened half-way to reveal in a blur the furry face of Ruddiger.
"Hey, buddy…", Varian slurred in a sleepy voice, letting his eyes close again. "…knew t'was you…", he added, referring to the familiar feeling on his paw on his skin.
"Varian !"
The boy had no time to process where the spontaneous cry came from, as his whole body was forced onto his back again by someone rushing over to him and embracing his frame into a fierce hug.
"Varian, you're awake !"
Varian tried to open his eyes but had to blink several times, the soft glowing light from candles and fireplace too much for him after so many hours of sleep. It took him a few seconds until a round, beaming face swam into focus.
"E… Elora ?" he stuttered. Somehow it felt like ages since he last saw her and he couldn't pinpoint why. "Uh, hi ! What's up ?" he asked sheepishly.
"Oh, Varian, are you kidding me ? You are ! You're awake at last. Well, I'm sorry, I dropped that bowl and I probably woke you up, but… after all I'm not sorry ! You're out of danger. Your fever broke last night and Remyus said you'd be fine once you'd wake up and…"
"And you should let him come back to his senses and rest, young lady", another voice interrupted, which Varian recognized as old Ethel's. "You'd better get him some fresh water now."
"Yes, Grandma", Elora grudgingly replied and hopped off the bed.
"Oh, no, she doesn't have to… I mean…I'm fine, really…", Varian started, but a fit of coughing seized him and left him unable to say more. He could only grimace through the burning sensation in his lungs.
Ethel sighed and came closer to rub his back.
"Easy now, lad. You haven't quite recovered yet. You'll have to give it time", she soothed while pushing him firmly back on the bed. "Elora, we really need that water now", she added over her shoulder to the young maiden who was still standing there, wincing at Varian's pain. She nodded and rushed out of the room.
"Varian, listen up. The pneumonia is receding and you're no longer contagious, Remyus said. But that's no reason for fooling around. No straining yourself. And until further notice, you follow my instructions, understood ?"
"Um, oh, ok", he quickly acknowledged, taken a bit off guard by Ethel's forceful ways. Sure, she was often straight both in words and body language, and that made Varian feel very much like a little boy who'd better heed her words and reply when prompted. But at the same time, there was care in her voice, and gentleness in her touch. He remembered feeling such gentleness before….
That's when realization hit him like a bolt.
"The Queen ?", he gasped, sitting up once again and looking around frantically. "Where is the Queen ?"
In response, Ethel laid her hands on his shoulders to calm the boy down.
"You're not being reasonable, Varian. Lie back down now. The Queen… is not available at the moment."
Varian gave her a questioning look, eager to know more. When Ethel remained silent, he came up with a logical explanation by himself, like he always would.
"Right… right ", he repeated, his shoulders sagging under the lady's hands. It made sense. She had spent so much time with him lately, nursing him back to health with all the energy she had... Now he was better, she was probably back to her royal duties. Or did she go and get the rest she clearly deserved ? He could only hope so.
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Frederic was pacing up and down the hall, his hands clenched behind his back. For those who knew the King, they knew it was a sure sign he was being nervous.
At least, the Captain knew it too well. Feeling thickness in the air, he cleared his throat before speaking.
"I have followed your orders, Your Majesty. My most trusted men are assigned to the prisoner's keeping until Alden and Phil are back on duty. I have specified they need to keep a watchful eye on him, of course."
No answer came, not even a nod as the pacing continued.
"And Hans will go on with the stable chores until further notice, so we minimize the chances he can get to the boy. Until we have all the information about that incident, that is."
Frederic came to a halt, not even bothering to look at the Captain. Instead, he turned to the window and gazed outside as if there was something deeply interesting in the garden. It was only mid-morning, and the Captain of the Guard knew it was going to be a long day for all of them. Of course, the King had been under a lot of stress since coming back from Epoisses. Having to accept his wife's choice to take care of Varian herself was not an easy thing to do for a start, and now… Frederic feared he and his wife would both pay the price for that.
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Elora came back swiftly with a jug of water which Varian drank eagerly. Panting for more with every gulp he took, he realized only then how much he needed it. Then it took more coaxing from Ethel to convince the boy to lay back down until his food would be served.
The truth was that, although still weak, Varian was feeling fine enough to dread having to lie awake with nothing to do expect be bored to no end. He knew every bit of this room by heart, every small crack in the ceiling or missing stones on the walls. Besides… now he was fully awake and conscious, he knew that unwanted thoughts and feelings would come back, taking control of him and dragging him down to a pit of darkness again. His father was still trapped in amber (or at least, he supposed so, it was too scary to ask), and he was still responsible for it. He was still a prisoner in this castle for committing high treason and threatening the Princess and the Queen's lives. After a few weeks within these walls, he was still getting nowhere.
And there he was, lying in a bed that, even though it was plain and simple, was more comfortable that any he had known. It was too comfortable, when all he deserved was a hard cot in a prison cell.
His hands balled into fists as his whole body started to tense again.
He was pulled out from his dark thoughts by voices he didn't recognize at first. Two voices, two men, by the depth of their tone. But they were bickering like children and didn't even bother to stop as they came in.
"And I'm telling you, the King was looking at ME when he underlined very clearly how he was putting all his trust in us", claimed the skinny one, "He knows I'm the clever one, admit it !"
"Funny you should say that, because I distinctly recall that he gave ME a nod, his eyes into mine, as he dismissed us. Body language can be more eloquent than words, you know", his colleague with a moustache assured him.
"You've always been jealous of the attention I get from the King !"
"Look who's talkin-"
"Stan ! Pete !", Ethel interrupted, exasperation in her voice. "Can't you two knock it off for a minute ? There's a patient who needs rest here !", she argued, her hand pointing to the boy.
Though she had managed to silence the two guards pretty well, she became silent herself, as she saw that Varian had rolled on his side, his arms wrapped around himself.
He had recognized the two men. They were the same guards who were standing by the rear of the cart, looking at him with scornful eyes as he was arrested and taken inside the tiny, moving prison.
His back still turned to everyone else in the room, Varian brought his knees to his chest. He felt bitterly disappointed with himself. He naively believed he was over this, he really did. He shouldn't care one bit for what those dumb guards thought of him. And yet, there he was, shaking nervously and wracked anew with frustration, anger and… sadness. The mere sight of their faces had brought back so many memories to the surface, and not even Ruddiger's gentle pats or Elora's spontaneous concern could snap him out of it.
"There !", Stan interjected. "You've done it now !"
"What, me ? You have upset him with your voice !", Pete replied vehemently.
"Excuuuuse me, Sir, but you have the most nasal tone of voice, here."
"Well, at least, I'm the one the King is trusting with the prisoner while the Queen is sick !"
"PETE !", Ethel shouted out to him.
"What ?", Pete shrieked.
"We weren't supposed to tell, clever one," Stan spelled out for him while smacking the back of the thin guard's head with this gloved hand. "Remember when the King said : "do not mention her having contracted pneumonia" ?"
Ethel facepalmed.
"Out… the two of you…. Just get out," she mumbled, barely containing her frustration.
"Varian, no !" came Elora's desperate cry. Ethel whipped her head and saw the little girl trying to make him stay in bed. But the teen was already swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, determination back in his eyes. Ignoring Elora, he stood up, but he immediately felt like he was on a ship. His body would not obey him, and the world around him was spinning. He lurched forward and then reeled, eyes rolling at the back of his head. He didn't even feel Ethel's plump arms catching him just in time so he wouldn't hit his head on the floor.
"And where do you think you're going, boy ?", she lectured the limp form.
"Do you need help, Ethel ?" Stan ventured.
"No. Absolutely not. You two are assigned to his watch, so go watch the door for now", she replied dryly without casting a glance at them. "And try not to argue for the next five minutes. Help me out, Elora, will you ? Take his feet."
Stan and Pete knew there was nothing else to say, and left the room, a little bit ashamed, but not before checking the two maids were able to haul the boy, skinny as he was, onto the bed.
"Wh... what happened ?" Varian stammered as he regained consciousness.
"You have nothing in your system, that's what happened," Ethel replied casually. "How do you expect to walk out of the room, let alone go to her ? Besides, Remyus would never allow it."
"B-but after you've had a sickness, you can help others with the same disease during the days after recovery. I've witnessed this a lot in my village, I haven't found why quite yet, but that's a fact. I-I can go to her, if you just get me the wheelchair-"
"Absolutely not, Varian. If you're not strong enough to walk, then you're not strong enough to help her."
"But I….". The teen trailed off. He had to admit Ethel was right. But he had to, he needed to…
Suddenly, his small frame convulsed as he felt his gut twist and churn in such a pain that he sat up and immediately doubled over, clutching his middle.
"Please… please bring me something to eat," he hissed through clenched teeth, his body cruelly reminding him how much it needed food. Or was it that his fragile mind only allowed him to notice it now ?
"Varian ?", Elora said, confused.
"I'll get my strength back in no time," he whispered, more to himself than to her, tears prickling at the corner of his eyes. "I'll do whatever it takes and I'll go to her. I must. She was there for me when I needed her. Now it's my turn. She needs me."
