Growing Up A Loud: Take Me Out of the Ball Game
So Full of It...
Welcome everyone to the fourth chapter of Take Me Out of the Ball Game!
DreadedCandiru2:
1: Indeed, trying to force things can have a massive backfire.
2: In some ways the sisters really embody the concept of "I'm from the Government and I'm here to help you."
3: I assure you if the sisters read this point they'd reply, "That's different!"
4: [note taking intensifies]
5: I couldn't help but take some pot shots at the season where "everything is different!" Only it's not really. Planning to take a few shots at that shitty movie and the horrible live action special. Only good thing about it was the actresses playing the kid sisters were utterly adorable, (okay they reminded me of my nieces when they were little) and watching Lisa's actress Lexi Janicek have the time of her life.
364wii: Lynn crosses the line so many times she's all but obliterated it. As for lying well, read on!
Sammtastic3.0: Poor Lucy indeed, thanks for giving me the idea and showing me that fanfic, 'Behind Closed Doors!'
Alix: Seeing as this is almost a copy and paste of another persons comment I'm betting money someone is block evading, but just this once I'll humor. We've seen the sisters use violence to enforce a rule he was never told about (Brawl), jump him nine on one over a quarter (Loud, Loud, House), steal his organs (Garage Banned), threaten him with a weapon (NSL), Luan sinking wild animals on him (April Fools Rules) compared to all that this is rather tame.
FanBOIs Ghost: She's threatened her brother with a bat and done worse to him than a gut punch for "fun." I'm not even the first author to consider this and use it. Mind you this is the series that considers it funny to imply that Ronnie Anne has beaten Lincoln in the past (look at how in some episodes he cowers down when she raises a hand.) We will be exploring that and some other things as the series goes on. Now then, there are about 7,700+ Loud House fanfics on this site alone, give one of the others a try.
MegaRiderKnux: Short indeed, I was really wanting to get something into the reader's hands. Also part of it makes more sense being put into this chapter.
As for the sisters, love the term Sports Tyrant. But yes one thing I get from the show is the girls can have very Mercurial natures, you can't tell from one moment to the next if the girls are going to hug him or hit him. I'll also agree fan content beats the show at this point, even though you have the fandom police trying to enforce canon and make fan works conform to THEIR interpretation of later seasons. Speaks volumes about how they cannot tolerate people holding different view points.
As for my stalkers, Lynn Jr stans, Salunatics and ther Luenny shippers are some of the worst. Did you know the Lynn Jr stans even bullied the poor girl that played Lynn on the live action show? I mean for fucks sake she seems like a sweet kid and they go and pull that shit.
Between the Salunatics going after everyone for not shipping Saluna hard enough, the Lynn Jr stans attacking everyone that doesn't worship the Sports Tyrant and the Luenny shippers attacking and driving the Luaggie shippers out of the fandom. Well there won't be much of a fandom left at this rate.
*~*~*~Loud House: Growing Up a Loud~*~*~*
Lori exploded, "what's got into him!?" She'd whirled around facing Lynn, "HIM!? Young lady you punched your little sister, then lie about your brother of beating you. NOW you have the gal to ask what's wrong with him!?"
Lynn pinched her nose, "Lori, he didn't hit me, he beat me. Big difference."
"I literally do not see how it's different," Lori glared down at her.
"It happened back in the fall," Lynn started to explain…
"It had been a long day of practice at school, and my adrenaline was still flowing, I really needed to cut lose. That's when I saw him, Lincoln, sure he's a wuse and no way he'd ever overtake ,e but still it was something. Besides maybe I could shame him giving up comics and finally doing manly stuff like sports.
"I ran up right beside him and yelling ' HEY STINCOLN! Catch me if…' before I could finish the little cheat took off like Usain Bolt," Lynn noticed the confused look on Lori's face.
"The world's fastest runner," Lynn explained, "and yes he was moving THAT fast, I never would have thought I'd see the day I had trouble keeping pace with him. I don't mind telling you I just stood there mouth hanging open like I'd seen Blake Bradley naked. Finally snapped myself out of it, thinking, 'so you want it that way Stincoln!? FINE!' I took off, but for some reason Lincoln was faster, the boy leaped over flowerbeds, pallets of merchandise being delivered, the corner of a fence never touching the ground on the property…" A distant look came over Lynn's face, "a crossroad had the no walk sign come on, he just leaped right into a tree, jumped onto the… Whatever you call those metal poles stoplights are mounted on…"
"There literally called traffic poles," Lori patted her sisters back, the devastated look made her forget about Lucy for the moment.
"Thanks, he ran along the one stretching across Carruthers Ave, landed on the other side and kept going without breaking pace. One block become two, then three, then he was out sight…" Lynn shook her head, "he's been lying to us this whole time Lori."
"Okay," Lori nodded, "I believe it happened, but I do not believe Lincoln has been lying to us."
"Oh no?" Lynn glared up at Lori, "what about when mom made him play football? He sucked when I tried to teach him."
Lori meet her glare, "well for one thing your lessons were literally pathetic, how about when Lucy pulled the ball away at the last second? An in case you have forgotten Lincoln can carry you, and Luan on his shoulders with no effort. For that matter I never understood just what mom's problem was… He walks all over town, bikes all over town yet that's not enough…" Lori sighed privately she worried her mother had very old fashioned gender views, at least when it came to boys, that wasn't unusual even in the most progressive families sadly.
"Beh, I still think he's lying to us…" Lynn said.
"Yeah and you think Lola never read Lincoln's diary no matter how much evidence you're shown!" Lori replied.
*~*~*~Loud House: Growing Up a Loud~*~*~*
The thin walls of the Loud House often meant if you listened just right, and if the house wasn't it's normal level of noisy, you could overhear anything, Luna had more than once called their home 'the place secrets go to die.' Today the sounds of the house kept Lori and Lynn's argument to a dull murmur.
In their shared room Lincoln relaxed on his bed pondering what just happened when his phone buzzed.
There was a message from his chat app, apparently Skyla had changed her name to VampirePrincess, seconds later a she messaged him, 'me again!'
'I thought you weren't a Vampire or a Kitsune,' Lincoln replied.
'I lost a bet to my sister Victoria and had to tell the truth. Well actually she just said my username was to long and I needed to shorten it. So I have time to chat now if you want.' She replied.
Lincoln smiled, she was cute, 'sure!' he typed.
'Glad to hear it! So I and some friends will be moving to Royal Woods soon and maybe we'll need help from the famous Girl Guru,' Skyla replied, Lincoln's heart sank at those words, that was an old shame.
As Lincoln looked up he was unaware of a tiny figure looking over his shoulder and typing into her own cellphone, Lily sighed, someone had to look out for Lincoln and if the other sisters wouldn't, well that left her to do the job.
The phone buzzed again, 'just kidding! Anyway we could use a hand finding our way around the school and it be nice to have some other friends. I mean sure there is Kat and Jordan but the more friends the better.'
'I'd love too!' Lincoln smiled, he really did want to get to know this girl better, 'so you wanted to be a Vampire Princess and not Kitsune Princess?'
'Kitsune's are awesome and all but Vampire's have immortality and hypnosis powers,' a picture came over, a close up of Skyla's almost violet blue eyes, 'look into my eyes.'
'Those are some of the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen,' Lincoln saved the picture, "eye's like that she probably could mind control me, I could look at those eyes all day." Lincoln said not realizing Lily was typing those words.
'Maybe we can have lunch sometime, there's a little stream and park where I'm at, we could relax and if you're good you can look into my eyes all you want,' Lincoln blinked and looked around, did the girl have cameras on him? All he saw was Lily reading a comic… Upside down, well not shocking he knew that issue all to well, "the secret is in the third panel," he told her.
"Ahhh! Thank you Dearest Brother," Lily nodded then turned the comic right side up, 'that was too close,' she thought to herself.
Lincoln turned back to the phone, Skyla was asking about his home and family, which Lincoln told her about in detail, before giving her his social media contacts. The fighting seemed to be getting worse from Lynn's room, then silence and then the sound of the front door opening and shutting.
"That was a scary fight," Lily said.
"Welcome to the Loud House," Lincoln replied, sending Skyla friend requests.
'I gotta get going again, but see you in school soon!' Skyla replied.
'See ya soon!' Lincoln replied laying on his back with a dreamy smile on his face.
"Huh, well someone looks happy," Lincoln and Lily jumped to see Lori leaning against the door frame.
Lincoln was about to yell about not knocking but the door was wide open, "hey…" he said turning a deeper red.
"Yes, this Skyla girl Lincoln is talking to is making him rather happy, I think our dearest brother has a new girlfriend," Lily grinned.
Lori sighed, "Lily he has a girlfriend, Ronnie Anne."
"She's not my girlfriend," Lincoln replied.
Lori decided to shelf that for later and get to the point, "so, we got a few things to talk about. First off, I am going to have a chat with Lynn and whoever else laid hands on you about the Monster Truck mess."
"Lola, and Lucy. While we are at it, I was also denied food, and use of the bathroom all over rules I was never told about and…" Lincoln was cut off.
"It was literally none of your buisness and if you had stayed out of it you'd have been okay," Lori said.
"I didn't…" Lincoln started.
"I don't want to hear it," Lori said, "for now I want to know about why you've hidden your athletic talents for so long, Lynn told me about how you showed her up in that foot race, why? Did you think you were getting payback for that night? Maybe payback over that badluck incident? Well?"
"Wait what foot race?" Lincoln confusion was written all over his face.
"Lynn challenged you a while back, you jumped over kind of obstacles and parkoured over the stoplight pools across Carruthers," Lori said, "ring any bells."
Lincoln blinked twice, then a few moments later replied, "I remember that, but I didn't see or hear Lynn, this one of her challenges where she yells it out while running right past you and it takes a bit to realize what she said, and that the rest of you and our parents will enforce whatever terms she sat even if you didn't agree with them?"
"This is true," Lily muttered, "I don't remember much, but I remember that."
"We're getting off track," Lori said, "if not Lynn why did you run, and why are you hiding your skills from us?"
Lincoln sighed and muttered under his breath.
"What was that," Lori said trying to loom over him, but this time Lincoln met her glare.
"I said it's always next time, or 'she's sorry,' but when I put a toe out of line everyone comes down on me. What about Luna's earbuds? You all gang up on me for my earplugs and even when I went to talk to Lola that wasn't good enough. You had to," Lori tried to interrupt but Lincoln kept going, for some reason Lori just didn't seem to scare him right now, in his minds eye he saw her striking at him and responding with a punch to her throat, "rub my nose in it. Make sure IT knew it's place…" Lincoln took a deep breath not knowing where that came from, "I know, I know, off topic, talk about it later… Well with that run I…" he blushed his emotions seeming to turn on a dime from enraged to embarrassed, "saw… I saw a raccoon…"
Lori had a list of things to say to her little brother, to put him in his place, but that last bit made her brain do a blue screen, "You saw a raccoon?" an eyebrow went up a fraction of an inch and her mouth was left slightly open at those words.
"Umm yeah…" Lincoln was looking at the floor.
"After that one 'Pranksgiving of Luan's when she had the raccoons attack him he's been deathly afraid of them, and squirrels," Lily volunteered, "also question," Lori nodded her lips pinched and brow furrowed, Lily went on, "what do you mean hiding? He's carried every one of us even you around before, he walks all over town and when not walking he bikes."
"Ummm, good point. We will talk about the rest later, and I mean it Lincoln," Lori sighed, "you have to understand you aren't the only one that gets a raw deal in this house. We'll talk about it at a meeting okay?"
"So a struggle session then," Lincoln replied his shoulders slumbing.
"Excuse me?" Lori put her hand on her hips, this was getting on her last nerve.
"You know, like in Communist China when," Lincoln started but Lori held up her hand.
"No need to mansplain," Lori said, of all the nerve, she'd taken the same courses he had, she said as much.
"Huh," Lincoln nodded at what seemed news to him, "we haven't covered anything about Struggle sessions, if nothing else my teachers try to make Communist China seem like a paradise, I read about it on my own and if you hadn't know what I was talking about it would be mansumming or some other ridiculous term, and hey why is it when I do what you girls do to me all the time it's mansplaining and sexist? Never mind I know it's different, like how it's perfectly okay for you to keep cutting me off mid-sentence but I can't do that to any of you, just one more double standard for the pile."
Lincoln took another breath, "now then, as for the struggle session, we both know what'll happen. It'll be me against ten…"
"AHEM!" Lily said glaring at him arms crossed like a mini-Lori.
Lincoln chuckled, "apologies, it'll be me and Lily against nine of you. That's not a discussion that's a struggle session were you keep going until I give in and agree with you, even if I don't really agree."
Lori was speechless, "I'll… We'll… Look let's just take a break to calm down okay?" With that Lori left them alone shutting the door behind her.
"This is going to be a long couple of weeks isn't it?" Lily asked.
"Yeap, they'll keep going until I, 'see reason,'" Lincoln replied, "happens a lot."
*~*~*~Loud House: Growing Up a Loud~*~*~*
Lori came back her and Leni's room, her best friend and sister was sitting on her bed, Lucy in her lap as the older girl played with her hair.
"You okay?" Lori asked.
Lucy nodded, "still hurts…"
"She has a bad bruise," Leni said, "Lisa looked over and she almost cracked a rib."
Lori nodded, "Look send a text the girls, let them know we need to have an emergency sister's only meeting. It seems like Lincoln is starting to think he is some sort of Saint that doesn't do anything wrong and thinks we are heartless harpies ruining his life. What's more it looks like he is bringing Lily around to this line of thinking, worse he's cheating on Ronnie Anne with some girl named Skyla, or he is getting ready to cheat.
Leni sighed, she loved her brother but he could be so silly sometimes, she supposed it was their fault, maybe she should spend more time with him? Could just be he was feeling ignored as the only boy in the house. Well one thing at a time, she took out her cellphone and started sending out texts.
*~*~*~To Be Continued~*~*~*
Well now you know Lynn's issues with Lincoln, she is the God Empress of Sore losers with an inferiority complex the size of UY Scuti, for those who don't know that's the largest known star, so the idea of her lashing out at Lincoln after being so utterly beaten seemed to make sense.
The line about Lola taking Lincoln's diary is a nod to the original One Magical Weekend. One of my troll reviewers kept saying it never happened even when I pointed out the source I used, namely the Instagram interviews that were done a few years back. I finally gave up trying to please that canon fundamentalist after they kept going "that's just an excuse."
BTW new policy if I haven't mentioned it, if I think you are acting in bad faith. Auto-blocked.
I redid the chat system in story as it seems to fit better than my original style, it flows better this way I think. Also felt that Skyla's user name needed to be changed so came up with an in story reason, plus hints at what's to come.
The mansplaining thing was inspired by a recent conversation on instagram. I gave a user an answer to what I thought was a legitimate question and got the usual mansplaining line, even though I thought the user was a dude.
Now as a rule not big on politics but we are gonna see that and religion factor in here, it has to do with a pet theory on why the Louds are the way the are. Namely Lynn Sr and Rita are very left of center and decided to have a big family as they worried conservatives would have more babies and thus more numbers than liberals. I should warn you, while I'm not going to be bashing people over the head with this those themes will be showing up a lot.
The religious one, well Skyla is a priestess in training so expect lots of themes tied to Shinto, Buddhism, Daoism, Confucianism and from Haiku and Jordan Western Occultism. You have been warned.
