Here's an extra-long, extra-fluffy chapter, if you please ! Enjoy and share your thoughts !

CHAPTER 95

Varian was surprised to find out that his new room was composed of two separate chambers, much like the sick room he had been living in for far too long. A major difference was that the first one was rather empty, compared to the Remyus' no-so-organized display of books and potions. Only a bare table, a few tools and bits of leather remained here and there, and Varian's guess was that it must have been used as a cobbler's workshop at some point.

The second chamber would be his new bedroom from the looks of it and, unlike the first one, it was all set up and there was a welcoming atmosphere to it. Ethel was already there, smoothing the fresh sheets she just put on the large bed. She caught a glimpse at Varian, who was wet from head to toe, and she rolled her eyes. Whatever the reason for this new mess, clean, dry clothes were in order. The teen's shoulders slumped with embarrassment and he looked out the window. No metal bars were separating him from the breathtaking view on the sea, but the place was high enough to discourage any attempt of escape, should he get any ideas.

"Who would have thought, hey ?" Alden asked casually, as he stepped into the new premises.

Varian blinked at him in confusion.

"What do you mean ?"

"Well, no offense, kid, but it's no secret that the King and you are not the best of friends at the moment. And yet, he had this room prepared just for you after… you know, Hans' attack. He probably thought you could use a change of scenery after that."

Varian looked at the floor like it was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world and shrugged, the sarcastic tone back on his tongue.

"Yeah, it only took him two madmen to brutally attack me to finally figure out that I may not be comfortable with staying in that room," he countered, memories of Nigel's poisoning and choking attempt back in his thoughts.

"Varian,' Alden sighed, "I'm sorry it took so much time, but don't you see the King is trying to help here ? From what I know, this decision came from him and him only."

"Well," Varian spat, "it will take more than a new room duly prepared by his servants to prove he wants to show kindness, let alone compassion. Not his strong suit."

"I understand that you're upset, Var-"

Varian scoffed.

"No, I don't think you understand, Alden," he answered, exasperation clear in his voice. "So maybe he was starting to open up, but whatever chances I had with the King, I've just ruined them by lashing out at him just moments ago !". He paused, his chest heaving with hyperventilation he couldn't stop. "…I… I should know by now. I always ruin everything", he trailed off.

Alden pondered for a moment. It was obvious that the kid kept blaming himself more than the King, and that was an understatement.

"Well, you didn't say anything that wasn't the truth. That was quite brave, you know."

"Don't mention it," Varian replied with a hint of irony. "I didn't really plan it. I… I don't know what I was thinking", he murmured, his hand finding his upper arm for comfort, as his body started to shiver with cold again.

Alden sighed and rubbed his face with his gloved hand. "You know what ? You've been through a lot today. And you should start getting undressed", he pointed out, noticing suddenly how much Varian's lips had turned blue. "Ethel should be back any minute with new clothes for you."

Unbeknownst to Varian, Alden was getting concerned about Phil. The younger guard should have been on his heels, but he was staying stubbornly behind. Giving Varian some privacy, the mustached man left and in a few long strides, found his friend and colleague just outside the chambers, in the hallway. Leaning against the wall, the young man had retrieved his gloves and was twisting and crumpling them between tense fingers.

"Come on, Phil, you know you can't avoid him forever, right ?"

Phil sighed.

"Easy for you to say. You're not the one who's responsible for Hans being on the run and still a potential threat for the boy whose watch is under your care."

"I know – and he knows- that you meant no harm. Besides, he never mentioned it. Believe me, if he was mad at you, he would have spat his venom to your face by now !", Alden tried jokingly, to lighten up the moon.

Phil stayed quiet for a minute, staring at his boots like it was the first time.

"It's all my fault," he said softly.

"So why don't you brace yourself, go in there and have a chat with him ? It will do some good to you both, you know. You'll get the chance to say how sorry you are and check on him. Because at the end of the day, what does matter most, Phil ?", Alden asked, raising an eyebrow indicating that Phil perfectly knew the answer.

He earned a light chuckle from Phil, who pushed himself away from the wall to rest a hand on the other guard's shoulder as a thank you gesture.

"You're right, my friend. He does. And he deserves that I care for his well-being after all this. It's just… I don't know what to say…"

Ethel appeared at the end of the hallway, a bundle of clothes in her arms. The two men looked at each other and Phil knew what he had to do. At least, he had a good reason to go to Varian.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Varian was putting on the dry clothes behind the dressing screen, and Phil was waiting for him to be done, silently racking his brain for a good way to start the conversation.

"So… looks like we both got wet today," he started but winced as the words left his mouth. Now that was a stupid introduction.

"What are we doing now, a contest about the awkward situations we get ourselves into ?". Sarcasm mode. Of course.

"Well, I guess I'm not bad at it, then", Phil admitted, rubbing the back of his neck, even though Varian couldn't see him.

"And I thought no one could beat me at this !", Varian replied, and Phil relaxed as he heard the smile in his voice.

"Don't you think you'll get away with it so easily."

"Try me !", Varian peeked out of the screen, a malicious half-grin on his face. It didn't quite reach his eyes, though.

Phil gave a soft laugh before getting serious again.

"Look, Varian, I…. I'm sorry for what happened. Hans is out there, and it's all my fault he could still be after you. I know today must have been traumatiz-"

"No problem," Varian cut him hastily, sharply but with no anger. "I'm fine." Then he repeated, forcing a chuckle out. "No problem, I'm fine."

Phil wasn't entirely convinced. Varian had never been good at hiding his stress. His body language betrayed him every time. The tense shoulders, the way his eyes were avoiding the person who was trying to get through him, his hands picking at his shirt… not to mention that his unsure tone and choked out words made it obvious that he was telling a fib.

"Varian, there's nothing to be ashamed of if you are afraid. Anybody would feel so after such an experience, and Hans has been pretty rough with you."

"I'm not afraid. I'm fine", Varian insisted, his eyes darting to the corner of the room.

Phil wasn't buying it, but he could see that the boy was on the verge of snapping. The only reason he hadn't, he supposed, was that he was desperately trying to believe his own words himself.

A chittering sound suddenly changed the whole atmosphere.

"Ruddiger !", Varian exclaimed, his excitement genuine at last as he knelt on the floor to welcome his furry friends into his arms. "Where have you been, buddy ?"

"It took a while to convince him, but I told him that you would give him a fair share of your dinner, and that a skinny squirrel would only be a mouthful anyway."

Varian looked up at the chiming voice and met the gaze of the little handmaiden.

"Elora ! You… you brought Ruddiger back ! Thank you !", Varian stutters, tears picking the corners of his eyes. He mentally slapped himself for being so emotional when he was trying to put up a brave face moments before.

"Don't mention it," she replied, her mood darkening fast. "It was the least I could do."

Varian gave a start at the girl's brutal change of demeanor. He searched her eyes, words unable to come out.

"I never should have left you alone, Varian," she said plainly, hurt and sorrow caught in her throat.

"Okay, what is this about, you two ?", Varian called out. "So Hans attacked me, he had crafted a perfect plan to get back at me and leave uncaught. Not your fault. Neither of you. Besides, again, I'm fine. So now can we move on ? Please ?". There was impatience in his voice, but also determination. Determination not to talk about this again. At least not now, he thought.

"Sorry, Varian, we… we just wanted to make sure that you're okay", Phil apologized.

"And I'm fine. The only thing I'm worried about now, is the bag with the glass shards we started to carve for the Queen's present, do you know where it is ?", Varian started to check frantically under his bed and on the table, his mind blissfully on a new matter. "I hope nobody mistook it for a trash bag."

And thus the rest of the day was peacefully spent. Alden, Phil, and even Elora helped on the Queen's gift under Varian's supervision. None of them noticed how much the sun was low on the horizon. But when Ruddiger started squeaking in alarm, they all shoved every piece into the bag and under the table. The two guards resumed their position on either side of the door and Varian pulled out a book as Elora scootched closer, both pretending to be enjoying a captivating story. One second later, the Queen stepped into the room, Friedborg in tow, a tray in her hands.

As adorable as the scene was, Arianna came in there with a purpose. With her usual royal demeanor, she gently yet firmly dismissed everyone for the night, asking them to let Varian get his rest.

"I'm not tired yet, Arianna," Varian protested like a 4-year-old as they all left the room. He tore his gaze off of her, and started to tuck in chairs that were already tucked. He couldn't just lay down and close his eyes. In the dark, there would be nothing else to do other than think about Hans, the attack, and his threat. There would be no rest, only his imagination running wild behind his eyelids. Those thoughts were already constantly barging in, unwanted, into his head, and he was still wide awake.

"Varian," Arianna spoke his name with great tenderness as she saw him walk over to his journal that Elora brought back for him and be obsessed that it should be completely parallel to the sides of the table, "it's been a long day. We brought you some soup, and then you should definitely get some sleep."

She knew what the teen was trying to do, how he wanted to avoid going to bed, and she knew why. Changing rooms was a good idea, she conceded and she was thankful to her husband for that, but that wasn't enough to erase the horrible memories of the day.

"I'll stay with you, Varian. All night," she asserted. "And –", she pulled out a vial from her dress and Varian recognized it immediately, but he didn't answer as his jaw clenched. "Remyus gave me this for you. Some white poppy seed concoction. It will help you go to sleep, if you wish."

Varian's eyes darted back and forth, still not locking with hers. His tired eyes blinked a few times, and he chewed on his lower lip, debating silently with himself.

"No… no, thank you," he finally blurted out. Gosh, he was feeling so restless inside, overwhelmed by things he couldn't name nor escape. His brain was on overdrive with anxiety, drowning out all sense of logic. He hated how fear was paralyzing his thoughts, how Hans was manipulating him like a puppet, even when he wasn't even there anymore. He felt unspeakably exhausted, and knew he couldn't hide it (especially not from Arianna), and would give anything to get out of his own head. And he knew how potent that potion was. A deep, blissful slumber was guaranteed, and yet…

The distraught teen shook his head.

"I can't have it. I want to be able to wake up and fight back if…"

Arianna sighed but chose to keep her thoughts to herself.

"Very well, Varian. You don't have to if you don't want to. But I still need you to try and eat a little and then go to bed. Deal ?"

Varian struggled to fight against the urge to scream his anguish and frustration. He forced himself to focus on one thing : she said she would stay. She said she would stay.

"Ok," he relented half-heartedly.

Moments later, Varian was finally in bed, lying down but his whole body tense and eyes wide open. Arianna pulled up the blankets up to his chin and with her hand, cupped his head right behind the ear and stroked his cheekbone with her thumb.

"You're okay, Varian, just go to sleep. I won't leave your side."

Varian felt his eyes water, even though he promised himself he wouldn't. He let himself be engulfed by the wonderful feeling of having her near, her and her love. Fear was still gnawing at him, but exhaustion won the battle and he let himself slide into the nothingness he was longing for.

Yet, there would be no easy sleep for Varian. Every few hours, he would wake up, shaking violently with nightmares which were getting worse every time. More than once, he ended up sobbing and crying in Arianna's arm. After the third time, he lifted a shaking arm toward the nightstand. For the first time in months, he chose to believe the promise that was made to him : she would be there, no matter what. She had proved it, many times over, and not only tonight.

Arianna pressed the vial against his lips and he swallowed the whole content in one go, choking back a sob. She wiped his tear-stained cheeks and held him close, letting him fall back asleep in her arms as the potion worked through his system. When the boy was completely limp in her embrace, she delicately laid him down, holding his head like she would do for Rapunzel when she was a newborn infant.

There were steps behind her, but Arianna didn't turn around. She knew those steps, and the sweet smell of chamomile was enough for her to know that her faithful Friedborg had brought something warm for her. She ran her hand through the thick black hair, not looking up.

"If it were up to me, Friedborg, I would keep him here with me, forever. I don't want anything in the world to hurt him again."

….

"But I know it can't be. And I wouldn't want to. Varian… he deserves to live his own life, even if it means that I have to lose a child again."

"I will not… I will never be like that woman, the witch who stole my daughter. Had Rapunzel never escaped from that cursed tower, she… she would have been nothing but a doll in her hands, existing only to keep her young and live forever. But Rapunzel… she would never have gotten to live her life."

….

"I know I will have to let him go, it's just…. I don't know how."

"You're right, he'll be in my heart… and I hope I'll be in his, wherever he will go."

….

Arianna quickly brushed away a stray tear on her face.

"Thank you, for listening, Friedborg."

And the Queen sipped her drink slowly as dawn came, her eyes never leaving the sleeping boy next to her.