Chapter 4: Tequila

"LJ, what were you thinking?" Margo yelled over the phone.

Lara Jean sighed, " I wasn't. That's the problem."

It was Saturday and the day after seeing Peter. Lara Jean woke up early that morning, and decided to call her sister. She knew Margo would be up trying to get any wedding planning that she could in. She also knew this conversation would start and end with a lecture from Margo. She was thankful that she didn't have to get double teamed by both her sisters. It was way too early for Kitty to be awake on a Saturday.

"Why would you lie about something like that? What does that prove?" Margo questioned and Lara Jean could hear lots of shuffling in the background.

"I don't know, Margo," Lara Jean groaned, "I guess I didn't want him to think I was waiting around for him or something….. What are you doing?"

"Trying to make a wedding invitation mock-up. And why do you even care what he thinks? You haven't been waiting for him."

Lara Jean was silent for a moment.

"Right?" Margo persisted.

"Right," Lara Jean said quickly, "But I guess, I still wanted him to maybe feel a little of what I felt, you know? When he cheated."

Margo was quiet for a brief moment, "I get it. I really do. But Lara Jean, you're only complicating things more. I mean now you have to keep up some act."

When Lara Jean had explained the situation to Sugar the night before, she had a similar reaction:

"So let me get this straight. You guys started pretend dating in highschool after you little sister mailed out your secret stash of love letters. You fall for eachother, get together for real. He cheats and you guys break up. Now he walks back into your life," Lara Jean nodded without saying a word, know how ridiculous it all sounded. "And it's all become full circle because now you're pretend dating an imaginary man?" Sugar put her hand on one hip and raised an eyebrow. "Girl, what is wrong with you?"

Her phone buzzing in her ear snapped her back to her conversation with Margo, "I know, I know. It was stupid." she pulled the phone away to check the notification. "Oh my God, Margo. He just text me."

"You gave him your number?"

"Well technically, He already had it," Lara Jean mumbled. "I just unblocked him."

"LJ…"

She had unblocked his number as soon as she made it home the previous night and fretted over what to text him to reopen their communication. She went to her Jeanette for advice, but when she told her friend about the night, she made it a point to leave out the part where she lied about having a boyfriend.

"Hmmm. This is tricky, because you can't be too forward, because you don't wanna be too thirsty but you can't be too standoffish either cuz I get the vibe you still want to talk to him."

"I mean, if he wants to be friends with me. I'm open to that." Lara Jean said casually.

"Riiight. Well I never have this much trouble texting my friends." Jeanette looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey, I feel very judged right now!" Lara Jean replied defensively. "Weren't you the one that said I needed closure?"

"Well…Yeah, but this isn't really closure, LJ. It's like you're opening a whole new door. I hate to tell you this, but the door where he cheated, is still open."

"It's not! We talked about it."

"But did you though?" Jeanette who was popping popcorn pulled the bag from the microwave and shook it.

"We did. And I forgave him."

"Hmm, but did you though?"

Lara Jean sighed, "Yes Jeanette. Now will you please help me? Tell me what to say."

"Ok, ok sorry. Want some popcorn?" Lara Jean shook her head. "Maybe you don't need to use words."

"What?"

"I mean sometimes words make things too complicated."

"Ok you lost me. How can I talk to him without using words?"

"We're in the 21st century, babe. Technology is your friend." When Lara Jean still looked confused, "Emojis!"

"Really Jeanette?"

"Trust me, it's a great way to say a lot without doing a lot of work. She stuffed her mouth full of popcorn but continued to talk. "The other day, I was hungry, I text my sister the Ramen emoji and she treated me to lunch. When I'm running late, I text people the running emoji." She paused, "Can you guess what I use the cat and water drop emojis for?" She grinned mischievously.

"Jeanette! I don't need the details please," they both laughed.

"Seriously though just send him a wave or something."

"A wave…hm."

"It's perfect if you think about it. You're saying 'hi' but quickly throwing the ball back in his court."

"You know what that's not a horrible idea."

"Of course it isn't when do I ever have bad ideas?"

"Well there was that one time you"

"Don't say it! Or else I'm going to start charging you for my services."

"Ok. I can do this," she opened her phone and went to her contacts. With the blank chat open she searched her emojis. She hesitated and Jeanette watched her closely.

"You have nothing to lose LJ."

"I know, you're right. I'm just overreacting."

"What else is knew? But that's why I love you."

Lara Jean made a few taps on her phone, "K, done, sent. No big deal. Now I can have some popcorn."

Jeanette held the bag towards her "I'm proud of you."

Just as Lara Jean stuffed her mouth her phone buzzed. "He's already replied."

"Damn forget what I said about you being thirsty, he wins in that department. What he say?"

Lara Jean finished chewing, "He just sent me the winking emoji...what does that mean?"

"Oooh, he's good. He's trying to beat you at your own game," Jeanette said seriously. "a wink can mean so many things…what are you gonna say back?"

"I don't understand this 'game'. Should I wink back?"

"Hmm I wouldn't recommend. Two winks in a row could make the conversation turn more suggestive. Unless that's what's you're going for. It is a Friday night.

"No that's absolutely not what I'm going for. I thought that's what the drops and the cat meant?"

"Woah, woah, Lara Jean. The drops and the cat are not suggestive. They are explicit. Keep up, girl" Jeanette sighed, "We've got a lot to go over."

"This is too much. I'm just not gonna say anything." she put her phone face down on the table and grabbed another handful of popcorn.

"No reply? I like it. You'll keep him guessing for sure. Then you can really see how eager he is. He will probably text you again soon. Beware though anything you get too late at night is a booty call."

Lara Jean was relieved when she received no follow up text that night, but here he was following up the next morning. Can you get a booty call in the morning? She thought.

"So what did he say?" Margo said impatiently tearing her away from her thoughts again.

"Um he asked if I was working tonight and if he could stop by again."

"Wow stalker much?"

Lara Jean bit her lip, "I don't know, maybe he just wants to catch up."

"Well you're gonna tell him he can't come by the shop right?"

"Of course. Saturday's are super busy," she replied but she didn't tell her sister she was considering seeing him.

"And also because it's not healthy for him to be popping up all the time, right?" Margo urged.

"Margo, don't worry. I'm not going to see him. I have plans tonight after work anyway. With Jeanette."

"Oh really?"

"Yep she's taking me to one of her friends concerts." Just then her phone beeped, signaling a call, "Oh wait, hold on, it's Kitty."

"It's way too early for her to call you, is something wrong?"

"I don't know, I haven't answered yet. Hold on a sec before she hangs up."

"Put her on three way!"

Lara Jean merged the calls, "Hey Kitty, Margo's on the phone too."

"Hey Kitty, is everything alright?" Margo asked.

Groggily Kitty replied, "What? Yeah I'm fine." She yawned.

"Why are you up so early?"

"I'm not happy about it. But I happened to roll over and check my phone. Margo text me what happened."

Lara Jean rolled her eyes.

"LJ I feel partially responsible for all this mess since I'm the one that sent those letters years ago which started you on this path of repeated fake boyfriends."

"Kitty,"

"Wait, wait," she yawned again, "let me finish. I feel responsible so I'm sorry. But you gotta let this shit go LJ. If you want Peter back you should just tell him."

"I do not want him back!"

"Why else would lie about having a boyfriend?"

"I don't want him back," she repeated again more quietly.

"So you just wanted to make him feel jealous or something?"

"You know what I already went through this with Margo before you decided to emerge from your slumber and grace us with your presence," She huffed, "so since you guys are already talking about me behind my back, you can get the play by play from Margo. I have to go anyway.

"Defensive much?" Kitty snorted.

"LJ, come you know it's not like that. We're not talking about you behind your back," Margo inserted.

"It's fine. I have to get ready for work anyway."

"Before you go LJ, I did want to tell you since I do feel I played a part in this, I do know plenty of guys here at school that would play the part of your boyfriend."

"Bye Katherine."

"Seriously. There will be a small fee but they will be whatever you want. Artist type, athlete, you name it. I even know a couple people in grad school if you want a more mature date."

"Hanging up now."

"Love you!"

She hung up the phone and opened Peter's message. Tapping her phone she thought about what she should say and began typing.

LJ: Hey, I do work today. Saturdays are usually pretty busy though, so I don't think it would be a great idea for you to stop by.

She sent the message and waited. The "typing" bubbles appeared almost immediately.

Peter: Oh ok that's cool. Maybe another time?

Lara Jean bit her lip and mentally kicked herself before typing.

Lj: Yeah, for sure.

She paused for a moment before following up

LJ: Actually if you're interested, my roommate and I are going to concert tonight. One of her friends is performing at a bar. You could meet us there.

After she sent the text, she threw the phone down on the bed and burrowed her head in her pillow, squealing. When he didn't reply immediately she got even more nervous. She decided to distract herself by actually starting her day. Who cares when he texts back.

She decided to take a long shower and try out her new face mask. When she emerged from her bathroom she checked her phone and frowned.

"Really?" She said out loud. The only text she had was from Kitty who had sent her a picture of one of her classmates.

Kitty: LJ this is Ralph he's a theater major and totally down to be your fake bf. He likes long walks on the beach-

Lara Jean stopped reading the message and locked her phone. She would definitely get Kitty back for this when they were all back at home for Thanksgiving in two weeks.

A little while later when she was dressed and brushing her hair her phone buzzed. And buzzed again. And again. Lara Jean picked up the phone quickly and saw 3 messages from Peter.

Peter: Hey sorry I kinda fell back asleep lol

But that sounds fun, I'm in!

Send me the details?

Lara Jean smiled and let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding. She replied with the details of the event and sent a thumbs up emoji.

Peter: Awesome.

Am I gonna meet your special guy tonight?

Lara Jean's stomach dropped, but she quickly replied.

LJ: Not tonight no. He has a family thing. It'll just be me and my roommate Jeanette.

You can bring someone if you want.

She extended the invitation but she really hoped that Sophie wouldn't be his date of choice. After a moment he responded.

Peter: I'll see if my roommate wants to join. It'll be like a friend double date.

LJ: Cool! I gotta head out for work but I'll see you tonight?

Peter: You know it.

After work, Lara Jean rushed home to get ready. She showered again and decided to curl a little so when she brushed it out she would have loose waves. The dilemma, however, was what to wear.

"What are you wearing?" She casually asked Jeanette when she went into the kitchen. Jeanette was on the couch in a robe painting her toenails. Her hair was wrapped in a towel that kept unraveling so she had to tap it to keep it upright.

"Hmm. Well, I promised my friend I'd wear the band tee. So I'll probably rip it up or something and wear some ripped jeans," She shrugged. "What about you?"

Lara Jean was sipping her glass of water, "I dont know. Probably just jeans and a tee." She looked at her glass, "Oh by the way, um I invited Peter and I think he's gonna bring his roommate. I hope that's cool."

"Of course, the more the merrier," She looked at Lara Jean, "So I'm guessing the emoji method worked. You guys are hanging out." She smiled at her roommate.

"As friends."

"Any details on the roommate though? Is he cute?"

Lara Jean shook her head, "Nope. They're meeting us at the bar."

"Hmm. I might need to do my make-up then. I was gonna keep it casual,! but since this is a double date…"

"A double..friend...hangout." Lara Jean corrected.

"Whatever you say. Friends or more than friends. You gotta look hot. Show him what he's missing out on. Come on," she said standing up " Lets raid my closet, you are not hiding that banging body tonight!"

A little while later Lara Jean and Jeanette were walking up to the Bar entrance. They could hear music from inside and a few people were outside smoking cigarettes.

"There's Peter," Lara Jean pointed as they approached the door.

"Oh wow," Jeanette whispered, "LJ, he's gorgeous" Lara Jean agreed but didn't reply.

"Peter!" Hearing his name he turned around smiling. When his eyes met Lara Jean's his mouth opened slightly at her appearance.

"H-Hey, Covey."

Lara Jean smiled up at him. She had done her make-up. Nothing too dramatic, but she wore a bold red lip and a slight winged liner. Her hair loosely framed her face. She had a pair of Jeanette's ripped Jeans. They were slightly baggy and cuffed at the bottom, with bleach stains. She paired them with her favorite combat boots. She tied together the look with a black tank crop top. She tried desperately to bring a sweater to wear over it but Jeanette wouldn't allow it saying, "You are not covering up all my hard work. I don't care if you freeze!"

"Hey." She replied smiling at him. She suddenly felt self-conscious as he eyed her but fought the urge to cover herself.

"Uh," he suddenly snapped out of it "this is my roommate Jeremy, Jeremy this is Lara Jean and…" he looked at Jeanette unsure of her name.

"Jeanette." She held out her hand, "nice to meet you."

Jeremy smiled and shook her hand. "Likewise," before turning to Lara Jean "I've heard so much about you Lara Jean. This guy won't stop talking about you," he was slightly shorter and stockier than Peter and blonde. Lara Jean could tell that Jeanette was interested. Peter elbowed Jeremy in the ribs indicating that he should stop talking.

"It's nice to meet you, Jeremy." Pretending not to see the gesture from Peter.

"Well boys shall we?" Jeanette led them into the crowded bar. Standing on her toes she scanned the room before spotting who she was looking for. "My friend saved us a booth!" She shouted and linked her arm with Lara Jean's while the boys followed closely "The roommate is hot. Thanks LJ." She whispered in her ear.

They approached the table and Jeanette let go of Lara Jean to extend a hug to a guy who Lara Jean assumes was in the band.

"Everyone this Lucas, Lucas this is everyone. He's lead singer in the band," they exchanged hellos and thanked him for reserving them a table. After a few minutes of small talk Lucas excused himself as he had to get ready to go on stage.

"Drinks? First round is on me!" Jeanette asked and then looked at Jeremy, "wanna come and help me?" Jeanette twirled her hair flirtatiously and Lara Jean bit her lip to keep from laughing as Jeremy hopped up eagerly. "Be back sooooon!" she winked at Lara Jean before disappearing in the crowd.

"That guy is like a puppy a swear," Peter chucked.

"If only all guys were that easy to figure out," Lara Jean replied.

"Uh oh, trouble in paradise?" Peter moved closer to Lara Jean in the booth. She told herself it was because it was loud in the club and he wanted to hear her more. She caught a whiff of his cologne mixed with what she assumed to be his body wash and found herself leaning towards him more.

"What?" Then she remembered she was supposed to be in a relationship, "Oh no. Me and him- we're fine. I just meant in general."

Peter nodded, "Ah, well most of us are pretty easy to decipher. You guys are the smart ones," he put his arm on the back of the booth and leaned back. She just nodded not knowing what to say.

"Thanks for coming tonight." She said after an awkward silence.

"No thanks for inviting me! I love seeing local bands. Plus it's nice to get to hang out with you again so soon."

"Yeah." She noticed that he didn't stop staring at her, "What is my makeup running?" she went to look in her bag for a mirror but stopped when he felt his hand on top of hers.

"No no. You look beautiful. Amazing really. I've never seen you dress like this," he didn't move his hand from the spot on hers and she wondered if she could hear her heart speeding up.

"I guess I'm all grown up now," she joked.

"That's definitely not a bad thing," Lara Jean looked away thankful for the mood lighting in the club to hide her blushing cheeks.

"You've grown up a lot too," Peter grinned and moved his hand back to the seat behind them. She tried to hide her disappointment.

"Shots anyone?" Jeanette said in a sing-song voice while she pretended to showcase the tray carried by Jeremy. "Two for everyone," and then she dispersed the glasses.

"Shots? You know I don't well with shots," Lara Jean sniffed the alcohol and her eyes widened, "especially tequila!"

"Live a little LJ." She plopped down and grabbed one of her glasses and held it up to cheers, "To being young and good music!" Peter and Jeremy picked up their glasses but Lara Jean still felt uneasy.

Peter nudged her gently, "Hey, don't worry you're with friends. I won't let anything bad happen to you"

"Fine. I'm not taking both though," she raised her glass with the group and they clinked their glasses together and took the shot.

Lara Jean shuddered rushing to squirt a lime in her mouth. After a moment, "That wasn't horrible. Let's take the other one," she said feeling the immediate burn in her stomach. She picked up her second shot and everyone stared at her in surprise, "You guys better pick up your glasses before I change my mind."

So Lara Jean had two shots. Then she had four shots. Then there was the Long Island, followed by the fifth shot. Jeanette and Jeremy has moved closer to the stage once the band started, which left Lara Jean with Peter who had stopped drinking after the second shot.

Lara Jean was chugging her next drink through a straw, "Slow down there tiger," Peter gently pulled the cup away from her, "Come up for air."

Lara Jean giggled, "Ok." She looked up at him while leaning closer, "You know you have beautiful eyes, I always thought so."

Peter batted his eyelashes playfully which sent Lara Jean into a fit of giggles, " Why thank you."

She smacked him on the arm and he pretended to be hurt, "Don't be a baby," she said which caused him to exaggerate his pout. "Ok ok I'm sorry." she rubbed his arm gently.

"You're forgiven," he smiled.

"God, your smile too," She rolled her eyes, "it's not fair."

"What's not fair?"

"You just" she began but shook her head.

"No no no, you can't start a sentence and not finish it." She continued to shake her head and bit her lip nervously.

"You know Covey, you're adorable when you're drunk."

"I am not drunk," she hiccuped surprising herself and covered her mouth causing Peter to laugh.

"Right what were you saying?"

"Ok, so maybe I've had a little teensy too much to drink," she held her fingers in his face to emphasize the small amount, "but hey I'm having fun!"

"Nothing wrong with that." Peter smiled and brushed a strand of hair from her face.

"You can't do that" Lara Jean said quietly.

"Do what Covey?" his hand was still gently resting in her cheek.

"You can't do stuff like this," and she reached up and brushed his cheek gently and he involuntary leaned into her hand. "And you can't tell me I look 'amazing'," she put up air quotes "or look at me how you're looking at me right now or how you have been all night," he was staring at her intently eyes searching.

"Oh yeah? Why not?" He leaned in closer so now their faces were only inches apart and Lara Jean couldn't look away.

"Because,"she said almost breathlessly, "you let me go."

Peter gulped not expecting that response, " Lara Jean, I,"

"LJ! Come dance with me, the band is awesome!" Jeanette was back at the table with Jeremy not too far behind.

Lara Jean backed away from Peter quickly and grabbed her drink chugging the rest before hopping up and grabbing her friends hand and disappearing into the crowd. Jeremy plopped down next to a still stunned peter

"Whew that girl is….amazing. Thanks for inviting me tonight."

"Yeah… no problem," Peter mumbled.

"You and Lara Jean seem to be cozy over here. Good job man." He patted him on the back. "Imma grab a beer, you want one?"

"Naa I'm good," Jeremy takes off towards the bar.

A little while later Lara Jean plopped back on the bench next to Peter who had a glass of water, "Why aren't you dancing with us?"

"Not really in a dancing mood."

She grabbed his glass of water and downed it, "Come on Peter dance with me I'm tired of being the third wheel with Jeannette and Jeremy." She laughed, "Their names sound good together." she stood up abruptly and wobbled,

"Woah woah," he steadied her by gently grabbing her waist. She let his hands rest there as she bent down and to his eye level.

"Dance with me peter," she stood up and grabbed his hands, "Come onnnn," She whined

"Ok ok, let's go." he stood ignoring his lingering thoughts and allowed her to drag him to the dance floor.

Almost 3 hours later, Lara Jean was leaning on Peter outside. She was exhausted, tired and still very intoxicated. Peter had given her his jacket to stop her small frame from shivering.

"Peter you're so tall, what's the air like up there?"

Peter was annoyed, so he didn't answer. He had been trying to track their roommates down to leave for the past hour which was made more complicated by a drunk Lara Jean.

"Can we go now?" she whined.

"I don't know where you live, Covey, and even if I did, we can't leave without your roommate." he shifted slightly as was basically holding up all her weight.

"I can give you my address." she said looking up at him with tired eyes.

Just then Jeremy and Meanette stumbled out of the club linked together. Once they reached the sidewalk Jeanette wrapped her arms around Jeremy's neck and they began making out ignoring the cat calls from strangers and Peter rolling his eyes.

"Ahem, guys… guys? Jeremy!" That snapped the two a part .

"Oh hey, bro we've been looking all over for you." He had a dazed grin on his face.

"You ok LJ?" Jeanette said as Jeremy wrapped her arms around her from behind nuzzling her neck

Lara Jean nodded, "She's fine, but I think we should get her home,".

"Yeah we were actually gonna head to your place," Jeanette giggled as Jeremy placed more kisses on her neck.

"I don't think LJ can handle an after party," he said looking down at her swaying with her eyes drifting closed.

"Well, maybe we should split up! You can take LJ back to our place, right?"

"I don't know if that's such a good idea—"

"Peter please take me home I'm tired. I wanna go home." Lara Jean spoke up.

"See, she's fine with it! Give me your phone, l'll put in the address and apartment number. LJ do you have your keys?" Lara Jean just shrugged "here," digging in her purse "take mine." After putting the address in the phone "you guys good?"

Jeremy began to tug, her. "Come on I got us a cab. See you later bro," Jeremy said holding out his fist to Peter.

Peter tapped it, "Have fun?

Jeremy winked and they ran off to get into the cab.

"Still with me, Covey?" Peter asked while ordering an Uber. She just nodded and snuggled into his side.

When they finally got into the apartment, Peter was practically carrying Lara Jean.

"Home sweet home, Covey," He said sitting her down on the couch before moving to the kitchen to get her some water.

"I'm hungry," she mumbled.

"Here, drink this and I'll whip you up something," He handed her an open bottle of water.

She took a sip of water before laying back down.

He shuffled around the kitchen checking the cabinents and fridge for ingredients, "Grilled cheese it is." he mumbled quickly pulling out a pack of cheese. "How does grilled cheese sound? Covey….Covey?"

He walked over to find her softly snoring sprawled over the couch, he couldn't help but smiled at the sight of her mouth slighty opened mouth, wrapped in his jacket with hair all over the place. He sat on the couch next to her and began to untie her boots and pull them off. He scooped her up into his arms and headed down the hallway looking for her room. He knew he'd found the right spot when he spotted the pictures of her friends and family on her vanity. He later her softly in the bed and pulled the cover over her.

He turned to leave but stopped when he heard a small voice, "Peter?"

"Yeah Covey,?"

"What did I do wrong?"

He laughed quietly, "Nothing Lara Jean you're just drunk. Get some sleep," he replied and patted her hand.

"No, I mean, before. In college, Why wasn't I enough?"

Peter sighed and thought for a moment, "Lara Jean you were more than enough, I was an idiot,"

"Was she prettier than me?"

"No Lara Jean-"

"I know the other night I told you I was over this, but I lied. I'm not. It still hurts Peter. It hurts so much."

After that, she rolled over onto her stomach and drifted to sleep.

"I'm so sorry, Lara Jean" he whispered.

Peter shoulders slumped and he left the room shutting the door slightly. Not wanting to leave her alone he took off his shoes and laid out on the sofa, knowing he would not be able to sleep that night.

—-

So sorry this chapter took so long, it has been a rough week, but I was able to get this chapter out. As always please leave your thoughts. A lot of things happened that need to be addressed. What type of friend is Jeanette? Will LJ take up Kitty on her offer to rent a fake bf? Why did Peter cheat?

Answers and more ore to come soon!

Peace,

Pink