Cereal

After a while, I made 100 iron blocks, just in case if I needed them for later, as iron sounds like a rather important material to have for, you know, engineering.

However, while doing all of this crafting, a realization hit me.

...How am I going to get into Mondstadt looking like this? I'm literally a robot in some kind of medieval-renaissance era world. I'm like the most suspicious person on the planet right now.

Want to test if you can swim or not?

Jaeger, I'm not going to swim across the lake to get to Mondstadt.

It would be funny though.

It wouldn't. Why would it be funny?

Just picture the wonder of u swimming across a lake. The flow of calamity just casually swimming toward you.

Shit, that would be kind of funny…

Uh, that's beside the point. It's still morning, and I can still do things like… Uh… Jaeger, how do I level up?

Level up? For heroes, I think it was… Saving people is the best way, but you can just beat 'bad guys' unconscious and it should give a decent amount of experience. Or I think beating them up and sparing them and letting them go also gave experience… I dunno. You have a help menu, check it.

Oh, I do have a help menu… Is it reliable?

You think our help menu doesn't give help?

I don't know if you've realized this, but you've kind of been on a rant about your own company and the gamer system in general. It's not really putting a positive image in my mind.

We're bad, but not that bad.

Well, whatever, find some hillichurls or something, and beat them up. Wait for night, and enter Mondstadt to get my 50 exp, and probably just leave.

Throw down a waypoint there while you're at it.

Yes, true… Well, let's just get out of the whispering woods for now, I kind of want to see Mondstadt in its true glory.

Starting to walk further, I start up another conversation.

The city will be bigger than it was in the game, right?

Yeah, making the main cities was one of the most basic things to do in game worlds, and since Genshin was considered 'big enough', I think they just added a small size multiplier on important locations, put in a few food sources, and called it a day.

Huh… Neat. So, in the standard system, the trash one you were talking about, the cities were small?

They were exactly like the game versions, so big, but unless if they had a big backdrop or something, kind of small.

Huh… Where did people without actual homes live, then?

They disappeared at night, or just didn't exist. The standard system is a mess, I tell you. We saw the word gamer and thought of all those fanfics, but instead, we got some kind of shitty yard-sale version of the system. God knows what we would have done if we couldn't modify the system ourselves.

Damn, that's kind of sad…

I tell you, if there are other gamer universes out there, we probably got the worst version of the system, honestly.

Yeah, okay, you might have a point there, but what about the classes and skills? Surely whatever god made the system couldn't have made it worse?

Don't get me started on those… We just got the option of warrior, mage, and rogue, and the only good option was mage, because the other 2 classes suffered from lack of good skills and abilities, and mage literally got everything.

It was a good day when people figured out we could start making our own classes and abilities. It was a revolution, I tell you.

You make it sound like you were there, were you?

I was technically in the "first wave" of gamers, but I was kind of bordering on the first and second wave, so I saw all the progress, but I was still kind of dicking around in my own worlds before losing a bet to Skryb and joining his team.

Damn, you really sound like a crippled gambling addict with how much you talk about bets and how it seems like every time I hear about them, you lose…

Why do you think I use so much copium?

I pity you.

Please don't.


After a bunch of walking, I finally get out of the whispering woods and see Mondstadt in its full frontal glory.

Honestly, it was bigger than I thought it would be… I can even see houses around the walls, and the land before Mondstadt had a lot of farms and farmland as well, it's pretty cool.

Now, anyways…

[Waypoint created]

Jaeger, your opinion on the next step? I was hoping 'Mondstadt' would also count out here, but I might need to actually enter the city somehow…

Well, you could always just assert your dominance by entering the city, getting the 50 exp, and then leaving without elaborating.

...That does sound entertaining, but I kind of don't want to freak out the civilians or guards too much…

Well, Klee probably told everyone about you, right? Might as well make the first impressions count.

Jaeger, I sound like a moron whenever I speak.

Hey, at least you don't mispronounce the words.

Fine, sure, let's walk into Mondstadt in the middle of the day and introduce myself to everyone. If it gets dicey, I can always teleport out of there anyways.


Lawrence

Lawrence sometimes wishes guarding the front gates of Mondstadt weren't so boring. Sure, he was technically the first line of defence against any would-be attackers of Mondstadt, but what kind of idiot intending to attack Mondstadt would just walk in through the front gate?

Well, the geographic location of Mondstadt would make that the only way, but…

"Uh, Lawrence, are you seeing what I'm seeing right now?" The sound of Swan, his guard buddy, said with a nervous tone.

"Eh? What are you-" I replied before looking at the bridge.

Only to see what seems to be a… Silver gentleman, casually walking across the bridge as if he owned it. But there was an odd aura around him that gave him goosebumps…

This isn't what he meant when he said he wanted his guarding duties to be less boring, Barbatos.


Cereal

Lawrence

Canon NPC

Level 25

Hp: 750

Stats:

Str: 40

Dex: 20

End: 50

Huh… Level 25… Well, if it came down to it, I could probably take him on. Although, it would be a tragedy if my first impression ended in a fight. Well, now here comes the moment of truth.

Walking up to the guards, who had their hands on their swords with a wary look on their face, and other civilians crowding around me, curious and slightly afraid at my appearance, I began to speak.

"WELL [Sayonara] THERE, FELLOW [MEN]! IT IS I, CEREAL, AND MY [Good Friend], [GOD]! I AM HERE TO [Eat] AND MAKE [Kromer], AND I NOW ASK YOU, HAVE YOU SEEN ANY [Two-faced lying scum] AROUND HERE? [Abandoned like the villain they are]?"

What the fuck, myself. That wasn't close at all to what I wanted to say!

Hehehe…

Stop laughing.

The guard I observed just a bit earlier, Lawrence, had a confused and nervous look on his face before responding, "Uh… Hello… Cereal. I… Welcome you to Mondstadt?"

You know, now that I think of it, why do they all look either nervous or afraid still?

Oh, I think that's because of me. You know the trope where the supervillain just emits an aura of fear and people can feel it?

I'm willing to ignore that for a bit.

"[Thank] FOR YOUR [Niceness] BUT COULD YOU-"

"Mister Cereal!" A voice interrupted me, but I could tell from a mile away that it's Klee.

In hindsight, maybe I shouldn't have pulled the trigger and ran away from Klee. Then again, I wasn't fully expecting to reveal myself like this so early… Well, she didn't seem bothered when I ran anyways so it might be fine…

"AH! MY [#1 Customer]! Klee!" I said, turning to her voice and…

Oh shit, is that Kaeya right behind her?

Kaeya

Canon Character

Level 59

Vision: Cryo

Hp: 4,000

Stats:

Str: 75

Dex: 80

Int: 60

Wis: 65

End: 50

Oh, uhh, Jaeger, you will save me if things go south, right? I mean, I think he's a good guy, but I just wanted to make sure…

Lmao no.

Throw me under the bus, then.

"Well, well, well. What an odd person to suddenly show up at Mondstadt's gates!" Kaeya said before introducing himself, "My name is Kaeya, and your name is… Cereal, correct? If I remember correctly, isn't that the name of some kind of prototype food over in Fontaine?"

I froze at those words that I've been hoping to avoid.

I've been beaten to the name of Cereal.

Hehehe…

Jaeger, please stop laughing.

"WELL! I CAN'T [Believe it!] THAT THE [Man himself] WOULD SHOW UP! WOULD YOU LIKE MY [Advertisement #2] [Just for 5 Kromer]?" I said, my words being twisted around, making me sound like a dumbass saying random things. I just wanted to ask if he wanted me to say my introduction again…

"See mister Kaeya! Mister Cereal speaks all funny!" Klee happily said to Kaeya, himself with an amused look on his face.

"Kromer? Perhaps you mean Mora?" Kaeya asked, I have no idea how he somehow managed to get that, but I'll take it.

"SURE THEN! [GIVE]" I said, holding out my hand. Sure, it might be a bit rude to just take money when I probably don't need it, but this was probably simpler to do. I'll repay him back later somehow.

He hands me the money, and I reintroduce myself to the crowd, which had apparently gotten larger somehow. I can even see other playable characters in the crowd, but I could always observe them later.

"MY [Code name] IS CEREAL, AND INSIDE [my soul] IS MY [Good Friend], [God]! I AM [EXISTING] TO [KILL] [PLAYERS]. DO YOU HAPPEN TO [found] [Any]?" I said, internally panicking at my words again.

Kill players?! I mean, yes?! No?! That sends the completely wrong message!

Kaeya just stood there with a thoughtful look on his face, before asking, "Hm, can we see this 'god' person inside your soul?"

...What?

You know, a thought crossed my mind earlier…

This isn't the time, Jaeger!

So, if you, hypothetically, of course, summoned me into the world, couldn't I just give you more of my summoning stones for situations like these? I don't think my coworkers would like it if I actively gave you weapons and stuff, but I might get away with it if it was just the summoning stones and didn't really 'interfere' too much…

Jaeger.

Yes?

You're stupid.

What the fu-

"I'M SO SORRY." I said after a long pause to everyone around me, "BUT I'M AFRAID THAT [god is a vengeful spirit.]"

Kaeya had a disappointed, but expected look on his face, "Is that so? A shame. Then, would you please come with me? I'm sure our acting grandmaster has a lot she would like to say to you…"

...Well, I did say that I wanted the 50 exp. I guess I'll be entering Mondstadt this way, then.

I gave Kaeya a thumbs up as a confirmation, and he begins to disperse the crowd away as I enter Mondstadt.

Cereal.

Yes?

Fuck you.

What the fu-

Quest completed.

Enter Mondstadt.

Reward: 50 exp lmao.

Cereal [Exp: 82/92]

[Waypoint created.]


An:

I haven't read my own fic in a while, so maybe a few details are off here and there, but at the end of the day, I decided at like chapter 3 this was going to be mostly a fic where I wrote for shits and giggles. Maybe I was going to go somewhere a bit more serious, but I decided that I am definitely not the type of writer who can do that.

Also, I don't remember when I changed the exp increase and stuff on my stat sheet or whatever for this fic, but I guess that's what I'm going with now lol.

I also realize the waypoints were supposed to be blue instead of gold, proving that my memory is shit, but I can't be bothered to change the previous chapters a little bit lmao.

[I was extremely close to using the 'jaeger has all his skills and items so he can give stuff to cereal' thing, but then I decided not to, because idk, I wouldn't want to write the consequences of that.]

[Best part about fanfics is that I can come up with bullshit and it might end up working, like that part about the standard system in this universe being shit.]

[FaBI probably uses a different system then their players do.]

[Probably? I'm literally the writer wtf.]

[Cereal sometimes doesn't feel so heroic... I should probably fix that.]