If only you had taken your serious misgivings about renting this place as an actual instinct instead of just assuming you were being paranoid. Maybe then you wouldn't have been startled awake by a sudden noise on top of the roof.

Maybe you wouldn't have felt the whole house shiver a bit and fallen out of your bed.

Maybe you wouldn't be standing stock still with a bat next to your bedroom door and imaging the worst.

'It's a burglar...' Terrifying image after terrifying image played past your mind like a nightmare that you wish you weren't awake for. But if the cold sweaty palms and very real bat in your hands had to say anything about it: this was real. 'Or an Earthquake. E-Earthquakes happen a lot in California. And wild fires... M-My house caught on fire? No. Maybe the roof caved in? Maybe... Maybe one of those out of date appliances short circuited in the attic? M-Maybe the Smart Home's mainframe suddenly re-booted?'

And then the sound of heavy stepping boots came from up stairs. Quick yet uneven stomps. Stopping and starting. Your heart began to beat heavy in your chest and your breathing became high.

'Somebody's... in my house.' Your grip tightened on the bat. A strange version of fight or flight activating. No idea what to do in this situation except stand your ground. 'Something's coming down stairs...'

Which is very concerning because: There are no stairs to the attic?

Far away in California, in an old and pretty ugly suburb, there was a quiet green house. It hadn't always been there and it wasn't always quiet, but it it was there and most people tried to ignore it and get on with their lives. No one talked about the strange little boy and family that used to live there. No one mentioned all the Earthquakes around it, lighting storms, electrical hazards and devastating accidents that tended to happen.

Because it all just stopped one day. Everyone figured if they kept ignoring the house then none of that stuff would ever happen again. And life went on. No one moved in or out of that house for five years. A new girl moved into it, bringing in a dog and boxes of who knows what while throwing out years of who-knows-what out of the house.

And people ignored her too. They were all really good at ignoring obvious things. Like how in the middle of the night, the roof top to the house suddenly opened up and something flew into it: Ignored.

- - - - — *

The Base had been inactive for approximately five years. Then again, inactive wouldn't be the correct term: It was in sleep mode.

All non-essential functions were turned off as the house was placed in a kind of stasis mode. It would still have all the general circulation and information storing measures, but with a downgraded form of security and management. The Base AI had been turned off, instead running a general "camouflage command". The house would "listen" to the neighborhood, pretending to be normal.

The base was pretty good at "reading" the activity. It would register the humans involved, assessed the level of threat, and then processed how best to handle them.

When Dib came along to break into the house, it kept him away from the main perimeter. But when others came by, it left them alone. When the mailman dropped off packages and bank notes, the front porch swallowed them up. When sales people came by and left their flyers, it set them on fire on the front lawn. When a realtor came by with a pretty young lady, it let them in.

Why? Because they posed no threat. Human females were known socializers who did things like planned block parties and sold make up. Neither human were from government agencies and the young one looked very uncomfortable. Based on previous data, the base assumed she'd run away screaming within 20 minutes.

Then a new anomaly happened: the young lady stayed. When the lady started moving in and more humans came along, the base was prepared to eliminate her. But things kept preventing it from completing its mission. First, the dog neutralized most of the gnomes by urinating on them. The girl kept flickering with the appliances until the energy was confused. Then, she signed on as the second base occupant.

Once she did that, the base had to recognize her as having "partial command" of the facilities. It meant she could live inside it peacefully, and the Base had to answer to her. Of course it was still in sleep mode, so it had been unable to give her the proper notifications needed. Still, it listened and did as its second in command asked of it. When she complained of the weather, the Base adjusted the environmental controls. When she was re-organizing the facilities with new materials, the Base tried to promptly deliver them to the correct areas. When she wanted access to storage rooms and supplies, the Base unlocked them.

(Y/N) was considered second in command to Zim in his absence. She was a good co-host as well. She kept all the facilities moderately clean, she saved energy and re-adapted the camouflage. She also seemed... pleasant. Instead of screaming and breaking things, she sung and cooked and quietly went about her business. The only thing the base recognized as annoying was her dog who kept protecting her from the more unstable parts of the base. Even though the Base AI was asleep, it knew it would have to recognize her as equal to Zim if and when he returned.

The only problem there would be explaining all of this to Zim...

Entering Earth's atmosphere was always a bumpy ride. From his first entrance to the multiple trips in and out, Zim would note how irritating it was to have to navigate the bumpy atmospheric drop. Earth's atmosphere had so many layers, too many in Zims' opinion. And he had to be very careful to make sure the Voot didn't take too much damage from the trip down.

Yet he rode in today as if he had just come back to Earth after only a few days away. A smooth-ish entrance, navigated with experience.

"Five years since I've been away from this stinking planet. Five. Long. Peaceful. Consecutively cleaner. Years." Zim muttered to himself as music played from Gir's head, Mini Moose spinning around them and the inside shifting too much. He had locked them both in the back and soundproofed the divider, but Zim couldn't block out the mental sounds that filled in the gaps of silence. It was an irritated reflex that only increased as they dropped through the atmospheric barriers; Zim always hated this part. "I'm gonna miss not being here..."

It was hard to tell the time when you're in the upper echelons of the atmosphere. But slowly, the ever deep night of space pealed back as Zim swooped down below, his target the suburbs that housed his small section of a separate peace and he could see that it was night time. The lower he got, the more he settled in to his seat out of a sense of expectation rather than anticipation. He watched as the stars that he left behind came in view above them, smaller and smaller, as the Green house approached bellow.

As the Base's strategic roof access opened, Zim naturally slowed down the engine to carefully huver down then gently drop in. It was all muscle memory for him, no need to think about calibrations or calculations. The only thing that disturbed him about the landing was the amount of dust it kicked up inside the base.

"Disgusting." Zims' tongue lolled out in a grossed-out expression. As the roof Base panels closed, the Voot began to shut down and all he think about was that room was dusty. He'd have to have the floors cleaned, along with the rest of the house and Voot. "Computer! Reboot now!"

The purple light inside the Voot flickered on and off before suddenly uploading back into the Base. The dull light fixtures in the room blinked bright once then turned to mellow shade of purple, lighting the room up with the same tone as a fireplace spreading a low glow stretching to each corner. Finally, the Computer was back. The mainframe AI had to be turned back on and reconnect with the past five years of gathered data feed, which luckily only took 10 seconds.

Invader Base Mainframe and AI back online. *

"Welcome back to Earth, Invader Zim." The Computer spoke through the speaker within the room in it's low yet knowing voice. It adjusted very quickly back into its position as the Base Computer, and was prepared to run down the list of serious issues that needed to be addressed. "Now that you've returned, we should review the last mission delay and I should inform you about the sudden change of Base status regarding occupancy and-"

"Enough of your useless nonsense!" Zim shouted at the Voot deck. He sat in his chair with his arms crossed, glaring around the base and dust. It had been five years too long since he spoke to the Computer and felt the sudden urge to be both disappointed and angry. "I thought I told you to keep the Base clean while I was away! Why is there so much dust everywhere?! Tell me why..."
"Uhhh..." The Computer stopped and processed Zims' interruption. Had the invader meant to disregard this basic information? Or perhaps Zim had a reason to be this tense about superficial hygiene? Whatever, it knew it had to respond. "Well, sir, the attic area is technically not connected to the basic maintenance and circulation systems as the rest of the base. So it... got a little dusty. Now, if I may, I should tell you about the new occupation update to our system and-"

"That is not important right now!" Zim yelled, shaking his fist at the roof of the Voot. "I can't step out into a filthy base! I demand it be cleaned now, I say! Now!"
"Ugh." After five years away with only limited cognition, the Computer had no reason to be surprised. If the computer had eyes it could roll, it would. "Yes, sir. I'll turn on the AC full blast..."
"Finally..."

The sound of the air control units and ventilation system circled through the air around the Voot. There was a small amount of dust that seemed to rise up under the purple shade, showing the form of the shadow furniture and workstations that stood long unused. Zim peaked over his shoulder out the window and small, solid yet short flashes of memory from years of working on the Voot in this room played across his mind. It was a five second replay that was forgotten and put aside as easily as it was remembered.

Zim laid back in his seat as the pilot controls powered down, turning down the tone of the usually bright purple and red neon enclosed space into a deep solid blue. Shadows crept quietly over the receding light as the Voot slowly settled down into a long awaited rest. Then the thin screen that had acted as a make-shift sound proof window fell down. And a wave of excited squealing came through which made Zims' antenna twitch and his ever present frown deepen.

'I should have welded Gir's mouth shut a long, long time ago...' Zim could feel the thin stretch of patience he had left pulled tight as a guitar string. 'Oh how have I been able to stay in this Voot alone with him for so long? At least it was marginally better than the first time we returned to Earth...'

"Be QUIET, GIR!" Zim shouted behind him, glaring angrily at Gir for the first time in about three days since he locked him backed there. How the Voot could contain all of this pent of screaming and fidgeting was beyond him since he had first bought it on-sale at a second hand market over twenty years ago. "Do you WANT to wake up the whole neighborhood!?"
"WAHOOO! WE'RE BACK HOME!" Gir excitedly jumped out from the back and onto the front seat. Happily bouncing up and down on the cushion as Mini Moose followed him out, looking out the window then pressing his face against it. A long blue light scan coming out and flooding the room. "I missed your house! I missed you dark and scary room! OH! Can I go see my monkey toys? I MISSED MAH TOYS!"
"Myeh!" Mini Moose bopped up next to Zim and nudged his shoulder a bit with one of his soft antlers. His own excitement barely contained alongside Girs. "Myeh!"
"Will you two settle down and quit it!" Zim smacked Mini Moose away into Gir and growled at the two of them. Instantly remembering why he threw the two of them back there in the first place, and really wishing he had done it sooner. "We just got back! I don't need you two running around with all of your space... things! Let the house be cleansed before I throw you both into a volcano!"
"Myeh." Mini Moose complained lightly before settling back down onto the chair.

"How long's it gunna clean for?" Gir asked, sitting up on the seat banister and then hanging upside down. "I wanna make brownies~"
"You can WAIT for brownies, Gir." Zim settled back down and rolled his eyes before glaring down at Mini Moose. "And don't you smack talk me, Mister! I just had to spend up to a month navigating our way back into this galactic system! You know how much time that took? Do you realize how many times I had to re-upload our navigation systems? Do you!"
"Myeh?" Mini Moose guessed.

"... Yes. It took a month." Zim glared at Mini Moose again before looking forward out the window. "But a month none the less! And it didn't help that Gir here couldn't keep the navigational data organized! OR that the computer's AI was down to save on data usage! It was a hassle doing everything all alone, by myself, with no help! Like everything else I've had to do on this planet..."

With that, Zim settled into a grumbling pout while Mini Moose sat still and Gir sung old TV commercial songs. Soon, the vacuum sound below them slowly quieted down before stopping, all dust that wasn't blown away had settled. The computer beeped in twice and altered Zim and the others that everything was clear.

"Sir, the dust has been cleared and I made sure to send sanitation vapors through the room. It's all clean now." The computer flashed a picture that showed 99.999997% of all foreign germs and dust had been cleared. "Now. If I can inform you about our occupancy changes-"
"Yes yes yes, we have returned! The base is at full capacity! Blah blah blah." Zim mockingly open and closed his hand and leaned back. He was impatiently tired to return to the lower levels and act as if he had never left. "Re-open the Voot hatch bay and allow us entrance to the lower levels. I have to download the newly connected data to the mainframe."

"Uh, but, sir?" The computer tried to get back to reasoning with him. "It's important to tell you that-"
"Enough with your boring, trivial chatter!" Zim shouted up at the top of the Voot ceiling. "If I wanted an AI that didn't follow orders, I would be asking Gir to assist me!"
"Yeah!" Gir happily helped, waving his arm up at the ceiling at the Computers' voice. "I'm unhelpful! Hi magic man!"

"Now open the hatch bay door so I can relax inside my base!" Zim yelled one final time. "Now!"
"I, uh, ugh. FINE." The computer did as it was asked, sending the commands through and wishing it had eyes to roll. "Yes sir. I'll only do whatever is convenient for you..."

The door to the Voot finally opened up, vertically, and both Gir and Mini Moose rushed out past Zim. He let the screaming, tiny robot jump out and Mini Moose followed him; then Zim carefully jumped down. He stretched his sore arms above his head and felt the calm with a familiar environment wash over him. It had been so long since he had been back to this base, so long that he had forgotten the kind of subtle peace it brings to return somewhere he knew everything about.

No surprises. Nothing out of place. Just his quiet, dangerous house all to himself.

"FINALLY..." Zim felt a kind of tired yawn escape out of his chest. He had not realized that all the driving had taken out so much of his energy. Letting his arms rest down, he smacked his lips and felt a small smile tug at his lips. "Now that we're back home, I can start downloading all the data we gathered into the mainframe. With everything we've learned from the previous excursion and all the dangerous adventures, there's bound to be SOMETHING I can use to finally DESTROY all the humans and take over this planet! Next, I'll start formulating plans before settling on an agenda. Then I... hmm. I guess I really should redecorate my torture room. Maybe I'll ask prisoner 777 for his advice. Change the color or something? Oh! I should also check on where the Dib's location has been, after I lost him in the Verta Vortex, I assume he came back here. Then maybe I'll wash my uniforms and start updating my weapons of mass destructions..."

"Hmmmmm!?" Gir suddenly stopped running around and turning his head 180 degrees to look at Zim curiously. "Why ya talking to yourself?"

"Because, Gir." Zim stood there and kept not looking at Gir, enjoying the idea that he was alone and pretending that Gir didn't exist. He smacked his lips once while his fingers played together for a moment. "I've been stuck in the Voot cruiser with only you and Mini Moose as conversational partners for up to a year now! And aside from Mini Moose's philosophical ponderings and the computers high alert readings, it has been the single longest, most excruciating, mind numbing pain inflicted upon me in my life. Therefore! I must have SOME highly intelligible conversation with something right now! And so far the only thing smarter-er than Zim in this house is ZIM!"

"And the human living bellow you in her bedroom." The computer quickly chimed in with a well placed correction.

"That is correct!" Zim smugly walked over to the elevator to go down to the lower levels. "No one is more impressively fascinating and capable of a mighty conversation with Zim other than Zim! I shall - Wait. What was that?"

Suddenly the whole room felt a lot hotter. To which Gir walked over to the thermostat and turned the temperature way down to a more ominous setting so it fit the mood better.

"The human?" The computer repeated, now surprised that Zim was actually listening to it. "The one whose been living here for the past two weeks? Had all her stuff moved in. Painted part of the living room. Put a lot of plants inside and outback. She's pretty quiet and well mannered as far as my backlog data has shown."

"…" Zim stood at the elevator with his claw extended as if he was gonna press a button. His mind was momentarily paused. His own brain was flipping through registered emotions and just decided to settle for: disturbed and angry. "Why is there a human slumbering IN MY BASE!"

"Well. She's not sleeping anymore." The computer brought down a hanging monitor showing a blue print of the house with a flashing red dot on the second floor. "She woke up as soon as the Voot entered the facility and my scanners show she has an elevated heart rate with high adrenaline gland activity. In human biological terms: she's fully awake."

Zim ran up to the monitor screen with both Gir and Mini Moose following him. He pulled the screen right up to his eyes and glared down at the reading. There was no camera feed but he could clearly see the heat signature registered of the unauthorized guest. His large eyes grew wider and his claws shook with anger as if they would pierce through the screen.

This was not what he wanted to see on his first night back.

"Ohhhh~ It's a pretty red dot!" Gir squealed while leaning over Zims' shoulder and fidgeting playfully. Enjoying the idea of a new guest who, from his limited interactions with human females, was probably fun and smelt nice. "I'mma call her Dotty! We can have a tea party and play the Snacking Snake games!"
"Myeh!" Mini Moose turned to Zim and alerted him of his discomfort for having a stranger in their base. "Myeh!"

"Why was a human allowed to infiltrate MY BASE!" Zim shouted up at the ceiling, shaking the monitor in pure rage. "COMPUTER! Why did the base not prevent her from accessing the upper regional facilities!? Why wasn't anything doing it's JOB here!?"

"Sir, the lowered status of the base's AI meant it couldn't prevent humans from accessing the facilities." The computer explained by displaying a visual form of all the life forms that it had to deliberately prevent or destroy upon perimeter breech. "Since she was not Dib, a member of the government or part of a traveling circus, she was allowed to enter the perimeters and inner facilities. Her presence wasn't interfering with the mission status and it would have been more hazardous to the cover IF she had been rejected."
"Then you just allowed ANY human access to this base!?" Zim yelled, carefully pulling the monitor down then pointing at it. "Do you know how DISASTROUS it is that a human has gained such sudden access to MY BASE! This filthy dirt thing could uncover our entire mission and compromise the Irken Operation of Doom to the entire galaxy!"

"YAY!" Gir cheered, clapping his hands.

"NO GIR." Zim turned his head to glare at Gir and gave an exasperated plea to get his minions' loyalties straight. "That's bad!"
"YAY!" Gir cheered louder and clapped faster.
"Do you want some random human coming in here and ruining our entire mission!?" Zim yelled at Gir, gesturing to the monitor. "Touching all our things and getting in the way everywhere!?"
"I like soft hands!" Gir nodded before poking the monitor. He had downloaded the previous feed upon entering the Earth's atmosphere and enjoyed the videos of her moving furniture, watching TV and cooking in the kitchen. "She seems nice! I wanna play with the doggy!"
"Relax, Sir." The computer flashed a diagnostic of the entire base, showing only minimal access to low security storage facilities. "She's only had access to the upper levels. And from the previous feed, it seems she's none the wiser to our mission or status. She currently believes that another human family has lived here. Although, it seems she has recently been investigating your disappearance."

"WHAT!?" Zim threw the monitor away to the side and stared up in horror at the ceiling. "That's even worse! No one can know where Zim was! It will ruin the element of surprise that my grand return to world domination will present! No. I have to get rid of her!"

Zim turned on his heels and marched over to the opposite side of the room towards the hidden staircase. Both Gir and Mini Moose followed behind him, neither sure what was about to happen but quick to follow Zims' commands.

"Myeh?" Mini Moose asked, hovering up to Zim's head as he stopped and began typing in coordinated on the wall command pad. "Myeh?"
"I'm going down to the second level to get rid of the human myself!" Zim glared at the command pad, typing in the upper level second floor coordinates. "If this human wanted to find me then fine! I will let the human see me. Let them pretend to have me... Before BAM! I will destroy them!"
"Aw~ But she seems nice!" Gir complained lightly before looking up at Zim. Suddenly realizing something was different from before and had to change before he saw a human. "You gonna go down without a hat?"
"A what?" Zim felt the top of his head with one hand then realized something. "DOGH! My disguise! I haven't updated it in over five years! I didn't even pack a second human disguise with me."

"It wouldn't matter if you did." The computer responded. "She found the box containing your previous disguises and undercover costumes. There was a picture of you along with several former personas you regularly used to use. So she will not be easily fooled into thinking you're someone else."

"UGH! Curses! This human is trickier than all of previous enemies..." Zims' squeezed his fist and felt anger rush and corse through his veins. He had to find the strength to carefully calm down before looking back at the command pad. "No matter... I suppose it's no matter. The human doesn't deserve the carefully crafted undercover disguise of Zim."

Zim slapped his palm on the pad and the command went through. An automatic door and stairway opened for him, the only one reaching down to the second floor right behind the small closet on the same level.

"Whatever this human thinks they have gained or what purpose they had for entering my base is no matter." Zim glared down as he began descending. His eyes glowing a piercing magenta in the dark corridor and his shoulders hunched over slightly. "For their trespasses, no mercy shall be shown..."

Down in your room -

The room was quiet as a sudden chill filled the large space. Blue shadows stretching out from the window only made the dead silence of the house seem even more ominous. But it couldn't cover up the sounds of the banging, stomping and steps coming from all over upstairs.

You pressed your body up against the cold bare wall next to the door. Regretting wearing the light orange colored shorts and nightly-tank silk pajama set tonight instead of something warmer. Bare feet dug into the carpet on the floor as you held the bat up, tightening your grip.

'Whoever's up there is coming down...' The thought made your heart race even faster. Now your breath was coming in quivering gusts from out of your nose, the pressure in your chest slammed down onto your heart and made the muscles in your arms tense. You were not ready for this. 'I should I should I should call the police or or or the Professor or or my realtor or someone!'

Your eyes squeezed shut and shoulders hiked up as you felt a sudden urge to cry build up inside you. The fear began to try to burst through as you imagined the faces of only one or two people you knew in this town who couldn't possibly help you or come soon enough. But after a second of this bone shaking fear took over, you took in a deep and heavy breath through your nose and straightened back up.

Now was not the time to get down on your knees and cry. Now, you had to overcome your fear and act. Or else you would always be the one cowering.

'If I did, they'd hear me and then what? I'd be trapped up here and wouldn't have a way out of my room!' You imagined the house in your minds' eye and saw that the fall from the second story window would definitely leave you too injured to run. And the space inside the house might be a better advantage to run through if you could get past this guy and down to the first floor. 'Finley's still downstairs and I haven't heard him bark yet, so it must be safe for now. Oh no, Finley! Poor Finley! I-I can't let this guy get down there and hurt him! I've just... I gotta figure out a way to sneak down after him! If Finley's in the kitchen then he'll bark as soon as he smells' someone coming down the staircase. Then, I'll sneak up behind him and bash him in the head! If there's more than one then then then I'll just push the guy at the top of the stairs down and make a run for it! My shoes are downstairs, I I can just slip them on and go straight out the door with Finley and make a run for it! I can do that, I can get out of here! I just need to-'

The sounds of the moving upstairs suddenly halted. Only for a strange sliding motion to crop up with sound of descending steps near by.

CREAK.

CREAK.

CREAK..

CREAK...

CREAK...

They grew louder and louder with each step, only to suddenly quiet down as they moved closer.

CREAK...

Creak...

Creak...creak... creak... creak...

The steps got softer and harder to keep track of. But with your ear pressed up against the solid cold wall, you could hear their vague whispers. They were slightly muted by the sound of the pounding of your heart which felt like it was trying to break through your chest. But they were there.

'He's getting closer...' Your arms lowered slightly as your teeth began to rattle. Yet you tightened your jaw and then held the grip on your bat so tight you worried it would break through like a twig. 'I will not let myself down. I will not let this man or anybody else try to overpower me. YOU are not the worst that's happened to me...'

The worst fear you can experience is the worst thing you didn't want to happen happening. The steps, quiet as they were, became closer and closer to your door. Suddenly, the fear in your body was small as an overpowering sense of calm washed over. Your eyes went wide, so focused they could see in the dark. Your breath was smooth and quiet, as if you were asleep. And the grip on the bat was steady. Images of baseball players played through your mind and your arms felt like they had played a thousand games before.

The steps paused right outside your door, and for a minute you wondered if this person was lost. Then the steps got suddenly louder as they stepped. One two three.

CREAK.

CREAK.

CREAK.

Right up to your door. You looked down at the door knob as you heard this kind of awkward fidgeting.

Flicka-flicka-flicka-flicka-flicka.

Like a child trying to jiggle open a locked door.

And of course your door was locked. You locked it as soon as you had woken and made the decision to stand next to it the entire time this was happening! Abandoning your phone for the baseball bat, you watched as the knob jiggled and jerked a little from side to side. Someone was trying to get in.

'He's not coming downstairs...' You watched the door knob only for a second more before looking up and crouching down carefully. If this guy was going to break in, then you were not going to be the first thing they saw. You were going to be the first thing they felt. 'He's not going to leave this house on two legs...'

The door knob stopped turning and there was a very faint sound of someone muttering. The voice had a high pitch like a childs'. Then the sound of a screwing noise came and you could immediately register it as a kind of lock pick.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzttttttttt~~~~~

The electronic sound was steady and quiet, almost relaxing. Then you heard the lock inside the the door flip open.

Flick!

And the knob turned, the old door creaking on old joints open to the dark room. Like the sound of a whining cat on a wet summers' day...

Grooweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

BASH!

You felt the full swing of your shoulders push through with the bat as you swung, twisting with your waist and still managing to stay upright in your squat! All of the strength and power transferring, waving out through your entire body before landing on something hard and heavy!

BANG!

The crash that followed was... strange. It was heavy, yes. But, not like a man falling over in pain heavy. More like the sound of a TV set dropping from two stories high up.

'That... That's not right.' The sound replayed in your head as you carefully drew the bat back. Staring at the open, empty space of your room for a moment. 'Did I... I hit something? What'd I just hit?'

The fear began to creep up in your arms and shiver, but your legs and head stayed steady. You waited a beat before carefully standing up and, curiously, looking over the side of the door into the hallway.

Though it was dark and narrow, you saw no one was actually there. Quirking a brow, you stepped out from behind the wall into the door frame. Dark carpet and shadowy white walls were all around you. Bat still drawn out in front of you, you looked around the hall and saw... nothing.

'What?' When you peered down, all you saw was some little... form. Too dark to make out anything except its basic shape. It was no more than probably four feet high and shaped like tin cans stacked on top of each other. 'Wait. What is that? I swear I heard a-'

CREAK.

WHOOSH!

Your arms automatically swung out in a 180 degree motion all around you. You felt nothing except a small punt hit the side of your bat. It felt like hitting a bouncy ball against a steal rocket ship.

BOING!

Something hit your bat then hit the wall with a soft 'PITINK' then landed on the floor. Yet... you saw nothing. Still, nothing was in the hallway! No person-shaped things laying out spread eagle on the ground that could possibly have made those stomping sounds.

'...' Your mind felt like it was working overtime to make sense of this. There definitely HAD to be something here. You heard it. You felt it! So what was it? Where is it!? 'What the hell did I just hit...?'

Tensely checking around, you still saw nothing on the floor that could have made those sounds. You carefully waked two steps around your door out into the hallway. There must have been something here! Must have been-

SQUEAK!

Your foot fell on something soft and squishy that was laying on the ground. It sent a sudden jolt of fear up and down your spine that caused you to jump up in the air about two feet. When you landed back down, you cautiously looked at the ground and saw something lying on the floor.

'What...' Cautiously, you bent down and grabbed it in your hand. Feeling how soft and awkwardly shaped it was, you brought it up to your face to find a moose shaped toy in your hand. It was maybe a foot wide and half a foot tall, very soft yet it definitely had some weight in your hand. You stared at it, eyes adjusting to the lack of light, quizzically. Was THIS was you had been so scared of? 'Is this some kind of squeaky toy?'

You held it up in your hand. There was a slight shiver running up your legs and a separate one down your spine. It was cold, colder than any summer night has been since you first slept here. And you could feel a slight tremble in your hand reaching out and shaking you to the core.

'Am I going crazy?' No. You definitely heard... something. Could it come from this little thing? No, but - Wait a minute. Your mind flipped and turned on a switch that brought some sense and reason to light. 'Wait. Where did this... thing come from? I didn't buy Finley any new toys, and we only found rubber piggy toys around here...'

It was strange how something so small and soft and plush became frightening. You fought an urge to squeeze it tight, to see if it was one of those squeezing toys filled with jelly that would pop out it's eyes. Instead, you looked over at the strange tin thing lying on the floor.

'What is THAT... thing?' Carefully, you crept over by sliding your feet along the rug. Soundlessly, holding the bat in one hand and the toy in the other. Looking down at the weird form lying down on the ground. 'I didn't put anything up here. It's too small and cramped in here.. And that's kind of... heavy.'

You remembered how things would come and go inside the house. Your work boots were sitting downstairs then they appeared in your bed room. The power drill disappeared from the living room then reappeared in a kitchen drawer. A door opened from a wall out of nowhere and suddenly there was a whole room full of strange metal things that don't belong in a house all by itself. A random toy you've never seen before suddenly appears in the hallway.

Somethings happen in a house. This was not normal. Whatever this is... is not normal.

Carefully, you brushed the side of the bat along the length of the thing. It was smooth and made a soft 'TING' when the bat hit its edges. It was shaped like a small child and layer flat on the floor. More questions came to mind.

'What is this thing?' You carefully crouched down, squatting down carefully and looking at the thing. The fact that it reminded you of a child kept bugging you. Nagging. Making you remember every child you've ever met, who came through an office and played. 'Where did you come from...?'

You looked over and imagined the big part as the head and the long appendages as arms and legs. Though you couldn't see clearly, your mind filled in the gaps. You carefully laid the bat down on the ground as you looked at it lying on the floor. Helpless and sleeping, or lifeless and heavy.

Reaching out, your hand touched what you thought was a head. It was smooth and cold, like the side of a car.

"What are you?" You finally spoke out, your voice soothing and quiet. Filled with a curious sense of timid regret, you couldn't help but feel like you had accidentally hurt something. "Poor little guy..."

Your fingers carefully traced over the head until your forefinger bumped into the side of something. Once it did, something turned on. They glowed bright, light blue. Like a mosquito bug trap.

And then the head turned and a glowing eyes and smile looked back up at you.

"HI!" It shouted gleefully like a happy child.
"AHHHHHHH!"

Your legs jumped up and back, but you fell and landed right on your butt. When you looked up, the bright blue light shone out and illuminated the small hallway. It carefully picked itself up and smiled over at you, standing like a young child who just found a playmate.

"Wha wha wha wha..." Your voice trembled. Small whispers coming out instead of words. No thoughts long than a second or quieter than a scream could come out of your head. "What... what... what?"
"Aw~ You fell!" The thing giggled and took one step, then stood and bounced on flat feet. It's expression was gleeful and full of joy, like a child who just woke up on Christmas morning. "Oh~ You're pretty! Oh, is that you're bat? You wanna play baseball with us?!"

"What?" Your heart began to race again. Suddenly it became hard to breath. Short, hard and heavy breaths were coming out as you stared at it. What question did it ask? "Us?"
"Myeh!"

You went stock still as you heard something speak. It came from right next to you...

Carefully, you held up your arm and looked down. The toy's eyes were suddenly glowing a bright light blue and it illuminated its dull expression.

Next. It spoke...

"Myeh!"
"Hey Mini Moose!" The child thing waved happily at the thing your hands, none the wiser or aware of your facial expression. It was too busy rocking back and forth while looking at you like a big plaything. "Look it's the girl! Aw~~ She's so cute! She got them eyes! She got that face! She gonna throw you and-"

Full swing, change from batter to pitcher, you threw that tiny thing and hit the child-metal-thing right in between it's glowing blue eyes. You didn't even know what happened next until you heard the loud, clinkering THUD hit the floor. Along with the sound of sinister-happy giggles erupting.

"Hehehe! That tickled!" The metal child laughed as it stared up at the ceiling, now twice as excited. "Hi, Master! I mades a new friend!"

You didn't stick around long enough to figure out who "I" or "Master" or "Mini Moose" was. Because you were up on your feet and sprinting down the stairwell so fast you slipped up a few times near the bottom. But you were still going.

'Holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit.' Fear override-ed all of that earlier strength and confidence and sense of reason. Replacing it with the urgency to move, leave, run and curse everything in your path. 'FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK WHAT WAS THAT!?'

In less than three seconds you had clamored down the stairs to find that Finley's bed was across the floor and he was looking up at you. The empty and dark kitchen was lit up only by the waning moon and it seemed like you'd have to jump lengths to reach the other side.

"Finley!" You shouted across the way at the poor boy who you suddenly remembered always whimpered when crossing over bridges and once run away from a squirrel that chattered at him. "Get up! Go! Go! Go! Run!"

You didn't have time to check if Finley had listened or if the metal thing was following you from behind. Your feet hit the ice cold, semi-metallic floor and your whole body shivered. You managed to get four strides in and make it halfway across the floor when-

Suddenly you weren't standing on the ground but being held up above it. The checkered tile floor clear in view as you hung like a pendulum above it.

'What the Hell!?' When you stopped looking up at the ground and then down to your feet you saw you were handing by some kind of coil! Suspended from the ceiling, the coil was thick like an anaconda but made of cold metal plating, wrapped all the way up to were you shorts ended near your mid thigh. 'What is this this this thing! What the hell is happening to my house!?'

The room didn't spin and nothing changed, all you heard Finley barking from the kitchen door as something walked down the stairs. Their foot steps were light but forced, you couldn't see them as you hung but your heart beat louder with every approach.

'What's happening!?' Ignoring Finley's protests, you tried to swing around and turn only to find the coil only let you spin slowly. 'What is it now? What the fuck has this house been hiding!?'

Images of strange robots and animatronics flooded your mind. Were you stuck in some kind of 'Five Nights at Freddy's' reject horror house? Was this SMART home trying to rearrange itself? Did spies really live here and left experimental androids behind? Was that tiny robot really the little boy everyone kept talking about?

You didn't have to wait long for answers as the thing walking down the stairs hit the kitchen floor and began to slowly make their way over towards you. You felt your breath come in quick and heavy breaths, the rush of blood pumping in your ears like the sound of pounding drums. Sweat was breaking out from behind your neck and all you could do was try to twitch and struggle as you hung like a fish on the line.

"You. Have trespassed onto sovereign Irken territory." The voice was dark but not deep. Somewhere in between a petulant child and an over-authoritative student leader. It came closer and louder with each step. "That is in direct violation of EVERY Irken Invaded Species treaty and other protocols! Not to mention I know you have violated SEVERAL Earth laws to do with your squatting on MY private property! With all of your nasty germs and horrible feet touching everything!"

You tried to move yourself to slowly turn around until something stopped you in mid air. The coil around you suddenly had glowing red dots that seemed to respond to a command.

'What?'

The was a snap.

SNAP.

And your whole body was turned around. Suddenly facing the stairs, you looked around with your eyes but saw nothing at eye level. The room was still dark, empty and cold. Except... there were these two long, thick sticks or stalks sticking out of some green dome near the floor.

'What...' You felt panic overcome you for a second. Too scared to look down, to find out what exactly was happening. Yet, the curiosity did eat at you and you wanted to KNOW what was happening. So you carefully started to look up. 'What is... What is THAT?'

Out of all the possible variables, all the most intuitive things, out of everything on Earth: THIS was unexpected. It was so surprising that it ceased to be shocking. So out-of-the world that your brain actually had to take a full minute to process what you were seeing and prove that it was real.

Once you carefully looked down, you were met face to face with... something.

Something green.

Something with pink or magenta colored eyes.

Something that was standing less than five feet tall and wore a kind of uniform that you had never seen before.

Something that had three fingers on gloved hands.

Something not human.

Something angry.

'What...' Your eyes went wide as you took it all in. This thing was just too life like to be some kind of computer generated cartoon. It had to be really in front of you as the shadows and light from the moon bounced of it's green form. But... it just couldn't really be real! Your mind and reason and even sense of self was fighting with this fact of reality. 'What... the... is... that?'

Your sense of shock was obvious to Zim. He had met humans whose reactions to seeing him out of his disguise seemed to gather fairly similar responses. It was just that he was in too much of a rush and too angry to fully appreciate the sense of mental control he had caused.

To him, the human had crossed too many lines. Too much was at stake by having them within in his base, his home, his refuge. Zim was not going to let this go on any longer.

"I will not have my mission compromised by the likes of some ignorant human before I even started proceeding to making a grand entrance." It glared at you, a hot and burning glare that looked like it would try to melt you from the inside if it could. It had a zipper like mouth with blunt teeth that gritted and growled as it met you (e/y) eyes. It was not surprised to see you here, yet it seemed disgusted to have to be so close. "My return to this PUTRID planet will not be ruined by the likes of YOU! SO, Earth-Stink, before I proceed to destroy you and erase any evidence of your presence within my facilities: Got anything to say for yourself?"

The shock was overwhelming. No 'awe' or terror could penetrate your mind as you stared at this this this THING. A kind of creature you could only imagine must have crawled up from the depths of this house. Too strange to be anything close to horrifying, except too unusual to be anything except fascinating. Nothing like it had existed in nature, or at least not in any nature you could think of!

The horror blended into fascination and terror into intrigue. You were mystified while your body felt all the fear coursing through itself. And as the blood continued to rush to your head, your brain began to pick a part all of the evidence you had collected, all the stories you had heard, all the things you found.

'Green.' The descriptions played through your head. The ones you had been trying to ignore all night long but were now loudly making themselves know. 'Loud. Rude. Short, like a kid. Always running around screaming. Talking about Earth. Never knowing who he was or where he came from...'

You KNOW what it is.

"Zim..." You whispered. Your lips were dry but your mouth felt full. You just had to say it. You knew who he was. "It's... You're Zim..."

"HMMHMMM!?"

Zim backed up a few steps and recoiled, standing up and staring straight at you. How could anyone have recognized him like this? So soon?

"How do you know my name, Earth-Thing?" Zim's eye quirked as he straightened himself back up and quickly recovered from the shock. He'd been gone for so long, how could someone he never met know him? This human was a strange stranger to him. And while he knew he was great and almighty, he had kept his identity very quiet while he was on Earth. No one should know about him or remember him. This human was too clever, too dangerous to be left alone. "What files have you been snooping through! First it was trespassing, now you're hacking into my Base for my information! Have you no shame, human..."

The words he used, the way he spoke about the house and how he kept referring to you as a "human". As if the term was a foreign insult, separating him from her on the most basic level.

Even if you couldn't realize it fast enough, your brain began filling in the blanks with the images of "War of the Worlds", "Invasion of the Body Snatchers". "Roadside Picnic" and "Starship Troopers" popping up. The words came out so easily. It was, after all, the only thing that made sense.

"You... I can't... I can't believe it..." Your mouth was going dry and your brain kept running ahead. Was it shock? Horror? Some weird kind of amazement you didn't have enough emotional bandwidth to explore? But you knew it. "You're... You're an alien. An alien!"
"You say that as if you were expecting something more simple." Zim rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. Why was it humans always made things so... anti-climatic? "What? You wanted something boring! Perhaps a traveling little boy! A lost little foreign family~ Maybe even a nice little couple who lived quietly down the lane~ Are you disappointed?"

You couldn't read Zim's face. It was just... flipped. The big, bug eyes and green skin. Could you see facial expressions in it? Did... did they do that? Make faces?

But you could kind of... see. The big eyes didn't have center pupils but two at different angles, and they spun. There was a human equivalent of that action, one that you used quite often.

'Did he just... roll his eyes?' Your head connected the subtle biological display of emotion with his actions. And it kind of made you angry. 'Did he just roll his eyes at me?'

Zim, however, couldn't really read you. Maybe it was because he had been off of Earth for almost five years? Maybe this was a different kind of human he had never encountered? Maybe it was because they were hanging upside down and that always kind of screwed up their features.

'Is it... awake?' Zims' antenna quirked as he studied the humans' face. He wasn't sure and he really wished he saw you screaming, or crying, or begging for mercy. That's usually what started happening by now and it always proved to be very entertaining. 'By now they would be babbling like an idiot and going into hysterics about seeing an alien. Hmmm... Maybe it's just stupid?'

'Holy shit those things move.' Your eyes went a little wide as you realized that probably most of those emotional signals are probably in his stick like antenna. The whole situation started dawning on you, the facts of the house and the alien and the fact that there had been no records of this place in any official office. 'I'm standing... hanging. Hanging in front of an alien in what is probably a space-ship house and wearing the last outfit I wanted to die in. Huh. Why is this not AS terrifying as it should be?'

It was then you realized you weren't totally afraid of Zim. Yes, you were afraid. But not in the sense of your life being threatened and how you've been living inside some kind of science-fiction nest. It was more like the fear you have when you go inside a dark place for the first time. A heightened sense of awareness and general uneasy feelings mixed in with curiosity and reason. It was like you were studying him.

Or maybe it's because you spent the last week coming up with various horrible scenarios about what was happening inside this house. You had yourself psyched up for an ax murderer a second ago or a SMART house animatronic horror show, those were things you could easily explain to yourself. But now being face to face with an alien seemed so absurd. As if this made the least sense out of everything you had expected, even if the evidence kind of lined up. It kind of felt like a really disappointing plot twist to a movie you had been really excited for and now it just felt... "meh".

The only one who was more upset by your lack of screaming in terror was Zim. He glared and gave a low growl, annoyed that he had yet to be given the screams in horror that he secretly desired. It felt like he was being ignored for some bigger kind of threat. And being ignored was one of the things he hated most in the entire universe!

Yet, when he thought about it, Zim found your silence and presence awfully convenient now. It gave him a second to think and reflect on the options he had, he hardly ever had a quiet human at his disposal! It was actually perfect to have caught a fresh human so soon after arriving on Earth. He had to start making up for years of abandoned projects and now new ideas flowing through his processors. The thought of having someone new to conduct experiments on right away made him excited.

"Well now this is a convenient turn of events!" Zim yelled with a sadistic grin coming onto his face. The little robot clambered down the stairs with the tiny moose in his hands, and Zim continued to stare at you with now delighted eyes. "I just realized I now have no reason not to start conducting my horrible tests upon human subjects right now! Sure, it's a little ahead of schedule, but I guess you have to start vivisecting humans at some point~"

'Did it just say vivisection?' Your mind snapped awake as soon as the thing began making coherent threats. 'Oh fuck fuck fuck no.'

"GIR!" Zim turned his head to the side to look at the little robot over by the stairwell. "Prepare the lower base levels for experimentation! I want to get rid of the humans' function brain capacity... things by tomorrow morning!"

"I found a funny lamp up in the lady's room~!" Gir held up an unlit candle in his hand and waved it around excitedly. "It smells like flowers and bathroom stores! I like bathtub things! Can we get a big bath!?"
"No! GIR! Put that thing down!" Zim glared and angrily gestured for Gir to drop the candle. "You don't know where the human got that thing! For all we know, it could be poison! Or a bomb!"
"It saaaaays~ it's 'Honeysuckle and Pink Sea Salt'~" Gir pointed at the label while sticking out his tongue.

"I don't CARE what it says!" Zim sighed exasperated. Thank Irk his hostage was tied up in the bases' security coils. It was embarrassing enough to have to scold his minion like this with the human watching. "No one would put 'poison' on a poison label! It might be even one of those supposedly famous 'BATH BOMBS' that the humans collect and market! Do you want that, GIR? Do you want this human destroying the base with their artificially scented biohazards!?"
"Maaaaaybe~~" Gir responded then held up the candle to the little toy in his hand. "Look, Mini Moose! I'mma make pink candle candies!"
"Myeh!" The little thing in his hand, Mini Moose, protested while wiggling its nubby hands. "Myeh!"
"Now look what you did, Gir!" Zim stomped his foot once then gestured with one open palm to Mini Moose. "Now you upset Mini Moose! You know how he feels about the cosmetics industry!"

Suddenly the room felt less dark and foreboding and reminded you more of a childhood slumber party. Everyone in this room was quite small and far too loud, like children. And even though it was dark and cold, it felt more like someone had just forgotten to pay the electric bill or more like someone was just really bad at managing the temperature.

This had to be the stupidest thing you had ever been forced to watch. Momentarily, you had been terrified and concerned for your general well being. Now? Now you just had a headache from hanging upside down for so long while these three miniature threats screamed at one another in high pitched voices.

'Grrrr? Who names a robot after a sound effect?' You mentally tried to work out the reasoning for all of these strange names, then shook your head. Now was not the time to be thinking about this! 'Come on, (y/n)! They're distracted! Quick, there's gotta be a way out of this! Some kind of button or lever or or-'

When you looked back over your shoulder, you saw Finley poised lower with his hind legs up high. He had his teeth snarled and low growl coming through. He didn't know what was going on but he knew three new people had trespassed into his house and his master was not moving.

'Fin's not gonna be safe if I'm stuck hanging up here like a gutted fish!' Looking back up, you saw the coils were secured around your leg but not painfully. More like they gripped for safety and secure as a harness. 'Maybe this thing only tightens if I resist it. But, what if I just... pulled?'

Carefully testing the waters, you fought the heavy pull of gravity and reached up with one arm to grab a hold of the coil. Avoiding the glowing red part, you felt it loosen as you pulled it up and gently moved your leg out.

The suspension seemed to restrict movement but the coil itself didn't do much. The reaction time for it to squeeze back was delayed by five seconds, and even then it didn't squeeze too hard. It reminded you of the blood pressure pumps inside drug stores, there would always be a window of about ten seconds where you could pull yourself out just in time before it locked you in.

'My leg is getting kind of sweaty, so I could slip out pretty quickly if I just push it back with my hand and then pull my leg out quick.' It was a risky move and you weren't certain if it could work, but it seemed like your only way out of it. But you knew that wasn't the hardest part. 'Even if I get out of this thing, I'm still trapped here! As long as that that alien is in this room, I can't get out! Unless... if I could time it just right. Maybe I could slip out when he's really distracted and run out of here with Finley in less than a minute!'

Risky. Risky risky risky. But better than nothing.

'I just need to figure out how to get him to not focus on me for a minute.' You closed your eyes and tried to think of something you could do. But you left your bat upstairs and you didn't have anything hidden in your pockets. 'What can I do? What could I-'

SNAP.

You were brought back to your sense by a slight shake. When you opened you eyes, you saw Zim was still standing there, this time growling lightly. He had snapped to get your focus back on him, after he was finished scolding Gir and breaking the candle.

"Do not pretend to ignore me! I am Zim! I am your primary source of DOOM here!" Zim yelled in your face. No spit but a fine mist of some kind of moisture coming out. He sneered at your face, hanging there and not having the common curtesy to be screaming and quivering in terror. It was insulting that he was yet to be basking in the glory of this humans' undivided horror. "You don't seem to APPRECIATE the magnitude of your situation! You are looking at the single harbinger of humanities DOOM! I demand you respect me as your superior who will be inflicting REALMS OF PAIN of which no human has ever had to withstand!"

Zim's screaming and misty breath beat into your face and ears. While his voice was, yes, annoying, he was so loud you could barely follow what he was saying. At least his breath wasn't terrible. It smelt like the artificial flavoring for green apple candy and some kind of dish soap you'd buy at a dollar store.

'What is WITH this thing?' All you could feel was a sense of disgust rush over you. You wished you could just wiggle your leg out now, but every time you moved it the coil would begin to tighten and you'd stop. You had to just hang there and take it. 'He's yelling and screaming and making threats? What is going on - No. What is he trying to do!?'

Zim looked as your expression changed to a puzzled look, some kind of mixture of upset and disturbed. Again, very different from the look of abject horror that he had been expecting. Zims' antenna quirked and looked you up and down. On second viewing, you were a strange looking version of humans. Smaller than the average adult yet taller than children. Your features were soft and out of place to this whole environment.

They confused Zim. Made him curious.

"What kind of espionage drone even ARE you, dirt-stink?" Zim reached and slapped his hand against your cheek. A light squeeze showed he could squish those delicate features and elicit a strangely pleasant sensation from it. He squeezed the other side carefully again, checking the feel and texture to confirm his analysis: soft. "You are not big or very intimidating. Yes, you are still ugly. But you're soft. Soft and rounded all over. Kind of plushy and squishy. What use does your softness serve? And you do not dress like any spy I have ever seen. More like one of those painted pleasure ladies."
"HEY!" You tried to smack his hand away with your other hand, but it was too heavy to move from hanging up and only managed to knock it down against your neck. Worse was the dizzy headache that made your eyes spin as soon as you spoke. A woozy nausea sort of built up at the pit of your stomach and dripped down. "Hands... off..."

"Oh! So you can TALK now!" Zim laughed to himself, taking cruel pleasure in making you uncomfortable as he squeezed the side of your neck a little. "What? Don't like being touched? Well, I can promise you, pig-stink, that I will make sure your examination will be very very uncomfortable! But I am curious. How did someone so soft and slow end up entering the perimeter of my base? Do you have some kind of weird, shaping ability? Perhaps the softness serves as a kind of malleable, shape... change-y... thing?"

He squeezed the side of your neck a bit too tight and in response got a pained groan. He looked confused and loosened up, feeling your breath return to normal but finding his hypothesis wrong. You did not change when you were squeezed, but you did seem a lot more responsive than Dib or any other human he had inflicted pain upon.

One simple squeeze and you alerted him that he was harming you - that was new. And strangely enough, he became gentle as soon as he heard it! Zim had never had such a responsive human inside his base.

'Soft? Responsive? Strange.' Zim listed the new qualities this human presented to him. So new and refreshing from the years away around other species who were gross and sticky. 'This human seems different from the others I've encountered. More like the Mookispean shape shifters, yet this human obviously does not change shape when squeezed. At least it's clean and doesn't smell like pigs. A refreshing change from most disgusting versions of this species...'

Zim was a bit distracted. In most of his experiences, humans weren't shaped like this. Then again, he had conducted most of his experiments and observations around male humans. He remembered the computer referred to you as a "she" and "her", the pronouns for females. It made him wonder if that meant you were physically different from them.

'I don't have much data around female biology.' Zim looked at you, your big (e/c) eyes that were unfamiliar to him and the pinkness of your lips. He moved his hand behind your neck and let his claws carefully scratch up to the bottom of your skull, eliciting a careful and surprised growl in protest. The sound bounced off his antenna like a soft warm breeze. 'Are all females this soft? So responsive? Do they have these same features and make the same sounds?'

He removed his hand from your neck then carefully placed it around your mid section. The soft gasp you made in surprise made him grin wickedly and press down, so different from most species and far more entertaining. Like your face and neck, your waist was also soft and had a curve that normally males didn't have. It was a surprise to him since most Irkens shared the same body type and physique, both male and female beings almost interchangeably alike. Meanwhile, you were the first female human he had examined up close and he could tell you were very different from most he had seen.

He carefully moved his hand along the lines of your side, feeling the smooth texture of the silky slip along his hand. Another thing that he found strange. Irkens wouldn't wear such loose and easily tearable pieces of clothing. Yet these barely covered your body and only seemed to amplify how soft you were.

"You will be the first female I have ever examined this... closely." Zim finally looked up from where his hand was placed. Seeing your expression tighten to a scared and uncomfortable frown, fear speaking through your eyes, he grinned. "Aw~ Are you feeling frightened now, Earth-girl? You should feel honored to serve me as my new test subject! I will enjoy exploring your body, human. Perhaps I'll test just how soft the rest of your body is. See how you do under heat and pressure. See how long until your break..."

He removed his hand to cross behind his back. Staring up at you, your look of shock and terror feeding into his delight. He found your expressions were so varied and entertaining. Something not found in other species and a new little entertainment device.

Zim leaned forward while balancing on the balls of his feet, relishing the personal horror he could inflict. He wanted to drag this out, watch your face twist and that pretty little voice of yours grow into something like a scream. Once he was only an inch apart, his grin spread to both corners of his face, he felt like he had all the undivided attention he could ever want.

"Scared yet?" Zim taunted in a quiet voice, smirking as ideas of the different kinds of torture and tests he could play on you danced along his brain. "Human?"
"..." The absolute astonishment and horror slowly faded to the edged of your mind. As it regressed, a bubbling and shaking anger began to grow. Something building from years of undeserved torment and neglect began to manifest to the surface of your mind.

No. You weren't scared anymore. You were furious.

'Fuck you, Zim.' You decided to make your escape while you had his undivided attention. 'Fuck you and your awful house!'

"HAUCK-PTOOO!"

You spit in his face, right into the cocky bright pink eye that had been staring at you. You didn't have to guess the kind of pain he was in as he fell back while gripping his eyeball with both hands, rolling on the floor in some kind of searing pain.

"OW! MY EYE! MY EYE!" Zim fell back and laid on the floor, both of his hands clutching his left eye as he felt the invading liquid start to sear the inside. It wasn't the same kind of burning pain that came from rain but it still stung and irritated the whole organ. "YOU DARE TO ATTACK ME WITH BODILY FLUIDS!? AHH! THE PAIN! THE PAIN!"

You didn't hang around there for long. In less than a second, you used both arms to push down the coil and slid your leg out fast before the thing could squeeze on to hold you back! Once your leg was out, you felt your body immediately flip down and landed on the hard floor against your shoulder.

The moment of relief was over as your stomach and head spun from colliding against gravity. The cold hard floor felt like it could swallow you up inside a pit with how much the nausea was churning your insides. The inside of your head and nose burned as you tried to not throw up, all while the ache in your shoulder and leg made you want to curl up right there on the floor and pass out. Your eyes were squeezing shut and you could feel a loud ringing in your ears as you tried to peel yourself up from off of the floor.

'No. NO! Gotta get up...' You managed to pull your eye lids a part and look up. Zim was still yelling in pain on the floor and the little robot Gir seemed to be too busy talking to Zim to be paying attention to you. 'Gotta get OUT. Alien... Zim's an alien! Aliens... Aliens are in my in my house! Gotta get out. Get out of this house!'

"Fin..." The taste of metal stung at your lips. You must have bit the inside of your cheek when you fell. Bile tried to rush up but you managed to choke it back down as you lifted yourself off of the floor. Unbalanced and dizzy, body far to heavy to carry alone, but you stood up against gravity for what felt like the first time in years. "Fin! Run! Gotta... Gotta go!"

You didn't bother to check if he'd follow. You just turned around on heavy feet and tried to run out the door as fast as you could. Your body began to feel lighter the more you moved and the more distance you put between Zim and yourself. When you passed Fin out the kitchen door, you stopped in the living room momentarily to check.

'Nothing else. No more aliens!' The giddy feeling of relief built us as you got to running again. You were so close to the front door! So close! 'I can get out of here and scream for someone. No! I could call the Professor! He'll know what to do! I just gotta get out of here with Finley and-'

"COMPUTER!" Zim screamed from inside the kitchen, obviously still on the floor. He had sat up and gripped one eye with one hand and then glared out the kitchen door. "SIEZE THE HUMAN! Don't let her get away!"

You wanted to whip your head back and look over to see what he was yelling at. That was, until you felt something wrapping against your midsection.

'What?' When you looked down, a different coil - purple and lanky and segmented, had found a way to gently wrap itself around you. 'Again!?'

"No-WHA!" You screamed as it tied around you tight and pulled you upwards. Reeling you up to the ceiling and suspending you ten feet up into the air! "No! Not again! What is with these stupid high ceilings!?"

This time it wasn't just one coil. Wires and tapers fell from behind the pipes and vents along the ceiling, curling themselves around one arm, a leg and adjusting to keep your chest and shoulders balanced. They kept your body up and hoisted above the floor where Finley was standing and barking up at the traitorous house.

Suspended high above the floor. You tried to struggle, wiggle out but found these things had some strange resistance built in. The material was like liquid metal that bent easily and wrapped around like fabric. Every time you tried to break free it would twist and pull back.

"What the-" You tried wiggling, rigging and kicking. Your legs couldn't find ground and you had nothing to pull on. Hanging in mid-air, there was nothing you could do to get out of it this time. "Let me go! Let me go you fucking alien jerk with a metal piece of-!"
"I'm afraid I can't do that." A voice rang out from above you in a deep tenor. It spoke low but clear, as if someone was speaking right next to you. "Although I would suggest you stop struggling now, for your own safety. Or else the restriction wires will have to immobilize you further.. You could really hurt yourself if you keep doing that."

"What?" You stopped for a moment, the fear sinking in that now there was ANOTHER alien in the house mixed with a shocking relief. Whatever this was was big and nearby, but you couldn't see them. No matter where you looked: there was nobody else in the room. "Who who said? Where... Where are you... Are you you an alien or... God?"
"Uh. No. I'm not... that other one." It spoke again, now sounding very awkward. "But, uh, yes? I guess calling me an alien would be accurate. Anyway, I'm here to, well, explain some things."
"Explain what!?" You shouted at the top of your lungs at the ceiling. Because being dangled like a fish twice in one night was not the most pleasant thing and this series of mindfucking events was starting to wear down on you. "Who are you!? Where are you!? How do you get these fucking things off of me!?"
"Well I can explain the first two for you. Although, you're not going to like it." Two open ended coils dropped down from the ceiling and then hung there menacingly as two poised snakes in the wild would. They swooped and gestured like a blend of arms and eyes that even Satan wouldn't have created. "I am an AI built into the mainframe of this Base's data system. You could refer to me as the houses' intelligence program or the artificial data connector with access to the universal mindset. But, Zim simply refers to me as "Computer"."

As if on cue you stopped struggling and just hung there like a gymnast in mid pose. Swaying lightly, you kept your eyes on the spot with the hanging wires and listened to the white noise playing through your head.

"..." The sudden sense of shock and disbelief almost gave you a heart attack. At least that's what you're calling the rock hard hitting pain in your chest as you hung there. "You're... You're the house?"
"Yes."
"So. You're. You're..." You tried to pull out explanations that made some sense. Because the only way you were not going to lose your mind tonight was by trying to make sense of all of this shit. "You're like a like a... a... an alien SMART house?"
"Uh... kind of?" The Computer actually found that equivalent highly offensive, but it's own artificial personality had been put on sleep during the five year interlude. So maybe that was the closest description it had available in Earth terms. "I'm an AI tasked with running covert operations, data connections, as well as general assistance and maintenance of the base."

"So... you're like a virtual personal assistant." Your mind was still spinning, but this was the most pleasant conversation you've had since you ran downstairs so you weren't going to start ruining it all yet. "Like Siri? Except... you're a house."
"Ha... Sure. Fine." The Computer honestly found this equivalent exasperating. But it technically couldn't argue with you and also, it was sort of correct. "Whatever doesn't cause you to have a mental breakdown."

'Is this computer giving me actual smack?' This night has been so fucked up that this whole situation doesn't feel that weird anymore. 'Holy fuck alien electronics are annoying...'

But you still had questions, namely: How to get out of this thing!

"Okay, Computer or Siri or Alien AI or whatever it is you are!" You tried to find the piece of reason in your brain that understood how to negotiate. There was still a small bit of hope that you could get out of here without major injuries and still find someone to tell about this whole alien thing. "You can- Can you just! Just! Let me go! Let me go and I'll I'll leave and I I won't come back or or anything and I'll-"
"I'm afraid I can't do that, (Y/n)." The Computer responded. "That would be going against Zim's direct orders to keep you here."
"H-How do you know my name!" You looked up at the ceiling shocked. "Where... Where have you... Have have you been watching me? Spying on me!?"
"Oh. That's big talk coming from the trespasser who's been digging through our stuff and throwing away anything she didn't like." If only the Computer had eyes it could roll. Instead it crossed the two hanging wires like a pair of arms. "No. I haven't been spying on you. You're registered in the base occupancy system. That means you-"
"I don't care about this!" You shouted as you tried to pull an arm free unsuccessfully. "Let me go! NOW! Put me down or I'll-!"
"You'll what?"

Your breath stopped and you stopped moving as you heard unsteady foot steps coming into the room. When you peered down, you saw the impish Zim hunched over and glaring up at you, one eye slightly swollen and both hands curled into fists.

Zim looked up and hissed under his breath as he saw you, the trespasser, hanging in the air without a scratch. He wished he could just strangle you now as you dangled above him. But that would ruin his plans to have your punishment stretched out painfully for hours and begging for mercy.

Besides, you spat in his eye. He has words he wanted to have with you.

"Pitiful cretin!" Zim stepped up directly under you to look up. He then remembered the spit incident and carefully took a step back, only to continue to glare right back up at you. "You'd fall to your demise if I released you! And while I would find it most amusing to see your decrepit body splayed out on my bases' floors, I can't trust Gir to properly mop it out for me. So, in the efforts to save time as I have now become incredibly impatient to begin my deserved revenge, you may start screaming your pleas for mercy now! Though I suggest you choose your words carefully, pig-girl. I get bored of lousy, sobbing apologies easily!"

You looked down below at the tiny green threat and couldn't help a glare come across your face. While every inch of your skin and underneath begged to feel afraid, you couldn't just swallow the fear. This arrogant little prick. Thinking he's the victim. Thinking you're the trespasser?

"Screw you, you little Imp!" You shouted down at him, glowering with venom down at him. "You're the one who broke into MY house! I swear, when I get my hands on you, you are going to WISH I had you tied up to this fucking abnormally high ceiling!"
"... Huh. That... That's not uh the uh that that wasn't the... You weren't supposed to start threatening me!" That actually had Zim baffled. No one has ever done that before. No one's supposed to be threatening him! "I'm supposed to be the one making the threats, not you! And this is not YOUR house! It's mine! I was here first!"

"Yeah, and you left it!" You shouted back, very acquitted with the laws of property transfer and knowing why you bothered putting a down deposit in the first place. "I found it here first! I bought... rented, I'm renting it! I cleaned it! My name is on the lease!"
"I BUILT IT!" Zim shouted back, stomping his foot down in protest. How dare this human argue with him - HOW DARE SHE! He stood up on the tips of his toes and pointed up directly at you, foam threatening to come out of his mouth. "This is MY base and NOT YOURS! You have no rights here!"

"YOU TOTALLY TRASHED THIS PLACE!" You yelled back, kicking your legs uselessly in the air while gesturing wide with one arm. "This place was a complete PIGS STY! You just left a huge trash pit everywhere and you say I'M the one who's wrong here!? You have a shitty way of living, Zim!"

"I LIKED IT THAT WAY!" Zim screamed back at you, glaring daggers ahead. OH, he could NOT wait any longer to start making you really scream. "THAT'S IT! I've had enough of this! COMPUTER! I want you to weld that mouth together so I never have to hear a single one of her dirty LIES AGAIN! And then I want you to get me a blade so I may CUT IT OPEN when I wish to hear her SCREAMING IN PAIN!"

Above your head, you heard the strange sound of clanking and whizzing and definitely a little hammering going through the ceiling. You felt all of your muscle tighten up at the sound of metal sliding through. Each sound sending a bead of sweat down your neck and a shiver up your spine with the sense of expectation grinding against your teeth.

'What the hell is gonna come out from up there...?' Each second you reflected on the strange tools and objects you had found hidden around the house. The spiny hammers, serrated edged sand duster, double sided powerdrill, rubber piggy attack drone... Actually, the seconds were getting so long that you ended up making a list of things you've found inside the house. '... And when is gonna get here?'

"Uh... So, how long is it gonna take to get here?" You asked while looking up and trying to place the sound of one slinding and whooshing thing with another. Just trying to get an idea of where anything could be coming from. "How BIG can the attic be?"

"Fool!" Zim yelled, turning to the side as Gir walked over next to him. "You could never even COMPREHEND the complexity this Base has! That tool is following the path laid out by Zim and following the direct commands of it's master! All of Zim's tools are coordinated to arrive as demanded by Zim!"

"And... what part of the house did you leave it in?" You quirked a brow, continuing to listen to the sounds of things coming closer, then farther, farther and closer again. The house seemed to be confused and rerouting the thing it was supposed to bring, which was more irritating then intimidating by this point. If this was Amazon Prime Delivery you would have had it here by now. "Did you special order it from another neighberhood or planet or something?"

"Do not condescend me, human-pig! My tools of massive doom and pain will be arriving, ANY MINUTE NOW! And you shall be eating of your dirty, snotty words once I commence the welding of your mouth!" Zim turned and pointed up at you threateningly. Then he held that pose for exactly one minute and twenty seconds. Suddenly realizing the moment of intimidation was passing by quickly and being replaced by the sound of whooshing and rushing over head still. "... Any minute now."

"Maybe you just misplaced it." You looked back down at Zim and nodded your head in a consoling voice. You could hear the frustration in his tone and decided to make a helpful suggestion. "Why don't you think backwards and try to figure out how to find it. Where was the last place you left a pile of crap around the house? Oh wait, I remember. EVERYWHERE..."

"Well. I guess it has been a while since I've been here. So I may have put it in the wrong drawer or- HEY NOW WAIT A SECOND!" Zim, momentarily distracted, shook his head and went back to glaring a hole through your head instead of drilling one like he wanted to. "You! You are far too sassy to be hanging up there in my torture chamber!"
"I think you mixed up your threats there." You crossed your unrestricted arm over the other and looked down at Zim. Semi-relaxed and just annoyed enough to keep pestering him. "Maybe you should come up here and make me shut up?"

"Don't tempt me, Earth-stink..." Zim hissed.

Zim could barely control the shaking rage that rocked through his arms. Humans, test subjects, prisoners - No single being in this universe should be able to talk to him like that! It was like dealing with someone who was a mix of arrogant and too stupid for their own good. Someone who just couldn't or wouldn't accept their proper place as beneath him!

'Just like the Dib...' Zim continued to glare up at you, despising the look in your eyes. Your sense of agency, your belief in your own security, your smart comments, sarcastic attitude and the very fact that you were still BREATHING was enough to irritate him! And it all reminded him of the single biggest annoyance that Earth had to offer. 'Stupid HUMANS who don't get that they should be terrified and trembling in fear at the very sight of ZIM! I don't even NEED to know what plan this spy had in infiltrating my base! I hate it! I hate it! I HATE IT!'

Two loud clangs rang out from above the both of you.

POW.

POW.

BANG! BANG!

Like the sound of someone hitting sheet metal, a single thin crane dropped down from a trap door hidden in the ceiling. In its' clutch was something shaped like an old-school ray gun with a glowing center that anyone could immediately recognize as being unsafe and highly unstable.

"Oh no..." You whispered, carefully trying to back up into the coils in an attempt to move away.

"AH HA! It is here!" Zim yelled victoriously, jumping up to point at the ray gun while Gir clapped. "NOW! Prepare yourself to be completely MUTE for the duration of my revenge! COMPUTER!"
"What?" The computer responded in an irritated voice.

"AGH!" You automatically ducked your head down at the sound of the artificial voice speaking from above you. Where was that sound even coming from? "You're still here!?"

"I'm in the house, I am the house, I run all of the programs." The computer really wished it had a way to demonstrate its irritation. Why does everyone think they can ask an all-knowing artificial intelligence stupid questions all the time? "Were you even listening during my explanation?"
"Enough of this never ending chit-chatter!" Zim called out, tapping one foot on the floor impatiently. "Computer, I order you to turn on my soldering ray so I can get back to causing MASSIVE PAIN against the humans!"
"Well, Sir. Before I do that." The computer tried to quickly interject and get Zim and the human to listen to it for once. "I must tell you about our Base Occupancy status to-"
"DID I ASK FOR AN UPDATE OR DID I ASK FOR SCREAMING HUMAN PAIN!?" Zim yelled up. "I ordered you to follow my commands! Now proceed with the following!"

"UGH... FINE."

You didn't have to wait to see what would happen as you heard the 'whoop'-ing sound of ray gun charging. Looking over with wide eyes, the ray gun turned to be pointed directly at your face. The center spinning and speeding up some kind of heating charge inside that glowed bright red.

'Oh fuck no..' You tried wiggling, maneuvering and kicking- any way to move out of these wires! But they were all wrapped around and bonded too tight! Not to mention you'd probably just fall and break your neck even if they did let go. 'Fuck fuck fuck no! Not like this! Not like this!'

"Ugh, no!" You tried struggling away still but found that the wires held you in place no matter what you did. "Let me go! Let me go!"
"Yes~ That's what I was after!" Zim grinned as he saw you try to struggle above him. Wriggling his hands in anticipation. "Scream for your mercy! It will only make this night more enjoyable for Zim..."
"Let me! Let me!" You looked forward at the ray gun pointed at you. Your heart sped up as your heard its buzzing ring in your ears over the sound of your own thoughts. "No no no no no no no no no..."

All sense of hope and reason seeped away from your mind. You felt tears well up in your eyes as you smelt the air around you beginning to burn up. All the things holding you up felt like they were suddenly crushing you as you stared at the mouth of a gun you couldn't even comprehend.

'This can't be how it ends...'

"S-STOP!" You closed your eyes and shoved your head down in a panicked attempt to feel like this wasn't happening. Like this would work. Like this would save you. "COMPUTER PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!"

Beep boop. Beep bop boop.

The air was immediately cooler. The wires felt lighter. And the sound of that incessant buzzing finally stopped.

"..." You held your mouth shut for a full fifteen seconds, fully expecting a searing pain to be shooting through your head any second now. Yet after waiting, you finally took a chance and opened your eyes to look up - only to find that the gun wasn't glowing or buzzing anymore. It had stopped. "What?"
"Huh!?" Zim looked up over at the soldering ray that should have been glowing and sending out ultra hot rays of pure miasma by now! Instead, it hung there limp and useless as an unplugged electric fan. "What is this!? Computer! Why is the soldering ray not... soldering!"
"Sir, the ray has been neutralized under the direct orders of our-" The Computer began again until it was interrupted.

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT THAT!" Zim yelled at the top of his lungs while pointing an accusing finger up at the ray. "I ORDER you to turn it on again and proceed with the unspeakable act of terror I have commanded!"
"But." The computer tried to reason again, this was important! "Sir! I can't-"
"DO AS I SAY!"

Suddenly, a tremor ran throughout the house that caused the whole house to shake! Even you swung slightly in the restraints that luckily kept you up and hanging as Zim was tossed side to side on the ground.

"WAH! Woah!" You looked around, both hands clutching the wires to keep you from slipping out and falling to your death. "What's happening!?"
"I don't know! That Base has never DONE this before!" Zim couldn't keep his balance straight as he was nearly swung here and there across the floor. "COMPUTER! Make this stop! OW! Why is the Base acting so strange!?"
"COMMAND ADJUSTMENT SEQUENCING HAS BEEN INITIATED." The Computer spoke out in a deep and authoritative tone. So automatic that anyone could tell it was reading out orders and not giving advice. "ADJUSTMENTS TO BASE AI HAS BEEN ESTABLISHED."

Slowly the room began to stop shaking and be still. You lightly swung in the air with both arms and legs clutching the coils for dear life and Zim picked himself up off the floor. You both looked up carefully, waiting for the Computer to explain what had just happened inside the house.

"Adjustment sequencing?" Zim, sitting up on his knees, carefully looked up with quirked antenna. "Adjustments to the Base Command Structure? What nonsense is this!? COMPUTER! I order you to recommence with the torture of the human and-"

BEEP BOOP!

WARNING.

A red light flashed out with the short sound of an alarm overhead. Loud and ear drum piercing to everyone. Then, the Computer spoke out over all of it in a booming voice to deliver the demands.

ERROR. CONTRADICTION OF ORDERS. UNABLE TO COMPLETE REQUEST *

"WHA-huh?" Zim looked up and blinked rapidly. His base had never said that or made that sound before! What was going on? "What contradiction!? I TOLD you to proceed with the torture and to follow my orders! I command you to listen to the orders of Zim!"

Again, the siren went off along with the flashing red lights. And again, another order was read out in a booming voice over the entire room.

ERROR. ORDER RISKS THE HEALTH AND SECURITY OF BASE OCCUPANT. UNABLE TO COMPLETE REQUEST. *

"That was the entire POINT of Zim's order!" Zim yelled back, gesturing up to the still dangling and slightly off balance human above him. "We do not CARE if the trespasser is hurt or uncomfortable! We WANT her to be hurt and uncomfortable! THAT WAS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE ORDER!"

"Will you stop that already!" You screamed down at Zim while clutching both ears with your hands pressed into the sides of your head. The booking voice and screeching alarms were already making you feel dizzy while Zims' incessant screaming was sending spikes of pain rushing through your arms and legs. "You're gonna make my ears bleed!"
"Silence your mouth moving, inferior infiltration drone!" Zim yelled right back up at you. Glaring at the very audacity that you would think your health mattered to him. "You have no say in this! I am trying to have a fight with MY BASE! Once I'm through with this! I will get back to wreaking havoc upon you and your puny planet!"

Yet again, the siren and warning signals went off. This time loud enough to make Zim jump up and fall back onto the ground.

ERROR. ORDERS ARE IN DIRECT VIOLATION OF WISHES AND SAFETY EXPRESSED BY SECONDARY OCCUPANT. REQUEST HAS BEEN DISREGARDED.*

"WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT!?" Zim, sitting on the ground, looked up at the ceiling/Computer in incomprehensible annoyance. A mixed rush of confusion and rage coursing through his veins and squeezing them so tight that he felt like his brain was about to burst. "What second occupant? Have you no brains of which to process with! I ORDER you to follow through and get! Rid! Of! The! Human! AND WILL YOU STOP WITH THAT AWFUL SOUND ALREADY!"

"I apologize, Zim." The Computer. Finally turning off the siren and flashing red lights. Yet it didn't change its position as it receded the soldering ray back into the hidden ceiling. "But I am unable to fulfill that order as it violates the Irken Tenecy and Strategic Partnership Policy. No Irken AI may cause harm to any resident or registered Irken Base user, even if ordered to by higher command."
"What!?" Zim looked up aghast at what he was hearing. He had never heard of such a rule or command structure. "What occupancy agreement? What Base user!?"

As you hung there slightly swinging now in the disarray of wires, it struck you that nothing was happening. All of a sudden, the whole house didn't seem to be turned against you or be able to threaten you. It was instead just keeping you put in one place.

It reminded you of all the times things would suddenly happen throughout the house without you ever having to do anything. Except, you did do something each time. You'd say something was hot or something was locked or something was missing. And then it'd change. As if the house was actually listening to you.

As if the Computer was listening to you.

"..." You hung suspended above the ground in disbelief. There were so many things that would make this seem crazy, crazy and stupid, but you had a gut instinct to try and ask for something else. "Can... Can you put me down then?"
"Yes I can." The Computer responded gently.

"On the ground." You looked up at the ceiling in a mixture of surprise and caution. Something told you you had to clarify and be very specific about what you needed. "...Safely."
"Yes." The Computer confirmed.
"And Zim can't try to stab me?" You asked while pointing down at Zim.
"Well, he can try." The Computer responded in a sort of off-hand manner. "I just can't do it myself."
"Can you make sure he doesn't stab me?" You asked with a quirked brow.
"Affirmative."

"WHAT!?" Zim yelled back, now standing up and looking up at the ceiling. "Computer! What are you doing!? Taking orders from that! A human? Our prisoner!?"

"She's not our prisoner anymore." The Computer clarified. "She's, well, our second in command."

Just then, the sound of random machines rebooting came up throughout the house and a small blue glow filled the room as a new announcement was made.

REGISTERED BASE OCCUPANT AND SECOND IN COMMAND (Y/N) HAS BEEN OFFICIALLY ACKNOWLEDGED. (Y/N) HAS BEEN GRANTED ALL SECURITY AND AUTHORITY GRANTED TO SECOND IN COMMAND OFFICIALS UNDER IRKEN INVADER COMMAND STATUS. ALL AI AND BASE COMMANDS HAVE BEEN REGISTERED TO FOLLOW HER COMMAND AND DISREGARD CONTRADICTORY ORDERS MADE AGAINST EITHER COMMAND LEADERS.*

Before you could even try to think of a question to that, you felt the wires around you loosen a bit and then gently descend. You swished and waved your head around and looked for some kind of craning mechanism as you were carefully guided back down to the floor. The wires stopped and hung about one foot off from the ground, to which you just stared at.

"..." You stared down at the floor in disbelief, as if you couldn't be quite certain that the floor was real or not. Careful and timid, you let one foot down, tapping your toe like a ballerina on top of the floor while hanging from a wire. Solid. "Well... This was unexpected."

Zim stood about five feet away, watching as you carefully lowered yourself onto the Base floor. He could feel the weight you added to the house, the fact that YOU had become a part of it. Behind his back. Against his will. When he wasn't around.

'How did this... how could it have happened...' Zims' antenna and left eyelid twitched. He felt a bubbling rage boil under his skin that made him shake all over. Just watching you was enough to make him foam at the mouth. 'My own base, taken from me! All by some some some second rate intruder that nobody invited!? This. Is.'

"UNACCEPTABLE!" Zim shouted, causing everyone to turn and look at him as he began stomping up towards you. "How! DARE YOU... How dare you turn my own Base against me! How dare you make it refuse my commands! How dare you...! You...! You...!"
"Uh, computer?" You slowly started backing up as Zim moved steadily towards you. "Can you um, do something? About... him?"
"Well I can't really do anything except intercept." The C omputer responded. "Zim, there has been no authority change except to say it's been extended to-"
"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!" Zim shouted up as he lowered his eyes and glowered down at you. "You've betrayed me, you all have! And I will not sit here and suffer through the EXCUSES! I don't need your help! Not to tear apart this stupid, stinking intruder..."
"WOAH! WOAH! WOAH! Wait a minute!" You kept backing up as this tiny green creature full of hate and apparently a massive amount of spite continued to march up along towards you. Suddenly getting the feeling like your house was way too small all of a sudden. "N-Now hold on! You! You came in here and and attacked me, alright! And I um... I'm just here to to to live in peace! You... Th-The place was empty so I just-"
"ENOUGH OF YOUR LIES, HUMAN." Zim commanded. He didn't see what was on the floor around him. He just pushed and kicked things out of his way: a plant, an ottoman, some dog toys. "You came into MY BASE and disrupted MY FILES in an attempt to infiltrate it then destroy my mission. I. Will not be stopped..."
"Hey! Quit making a mess in here! I just cleaned that!" You watched as Zim marched forward and created a clear path of destruction towards you. He broke your potted philodendron. Threw the throw rug from Thailand over the TV. Broke a leg of the blue ottoman. And tore one of Fins' toys apart! "And I did not do that! I just... I-It was on the market! It was cheap! And, h-how was I supposed to know some alien lived here!? I just thought it was like, an old soviet waste dump filled with toxic trash that-"

You were stopped in your tracks as you back hit the wall. The cold chill spiked through your back and your heart nearly cracked open as you stared at him. Zim was marching closer and closer, sending a shiver down your spine even as your brain tried to get you to calm down.

'How can something the size of a middle schooler be so intimidating?' Your eyes went wide and you felt suddenly was sweatier than before. 'I I I have no idea how to react to an angry alien! Is it like handling a bear attack? Should I just... play dead? No, that'd be stupid. Make myself look bigger? Wait. No I am bigger.'

"Uh..." With nothing around you to hit him with or any idea of what to do, you figured something stupid was your best shot. "FINLEY! Come play with your new friend!"

"Huh?" Zim quirked an eye as he stopped one foot away from you before rolling his eyes. "Is this another PATHETIC attempt for you to try and distract me? Disappointing! There is nothing on this Earth more terrible or vicious than the anger of an Irken Elite Invader-"

"GGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!"

You watched as Finley, this little furball who once rolled over on his back over your flower beds with this shit eating grin, jump and attack Zim. While Zim may have been about a foot taller than Finley and have maybe 20 lbs on him, he fell to the floor as Finley began scratching and biting at him.

"AGH!?" Zim shouted, trying to kick the dog away but failing as Fin kept pouncing right back on him. "What is this horrible, mangey beast?! OH! It's horrible! GUH! The-the SMELL! OWWW! GET IT OFF OF ME! GET IT AWAY!"
"..." You watched and carefully peeled yourself off of the wall again. Now standing forward and watching as Zim, this apparently highly intelligent species full of malicious intent, was getting attacked by a dog you regularly wash inside a kiddy pool in the backyard. "Huh, maybe I did accidentally rescue a guard dog with my ex. Good choice."

Everyone, meaning you and computer, watched as Zim rolled along the floor and Finley continued to pounce on him. It had started off as shocking, but now began to devolve into a mixture of sad and hilarious. You weren't sure if you should try and stop this or start recording it to put up on your social media page.

"Uh, should we..." You pointed over at Zim as your dog continued to bite and grind down on his skinny green arms. Looking up at the ceiling and hoping the computer was omnipresent enough to respond. "Like, is this... Can I, just... leave? Now?"
"Uh... Well, I guess." The computer responded. "You're not gonna tell anyone about it, right?"
"..." You looked carefully up at the computer with a quirked brow. "You gonna stop me?"

"Hmmm." The computer searched its files to check. "Well. I guess I sort of have to. But I'm not supposed to hurt you or anything anymore."

It was at that second, Zim was able to throw Finley off and then climb up the newly built bookshelf, just out of the dogs' reach. He heaved his chest and the looked over and snarled at you.

"NOT IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO STOP YOU WITH!" Zim shouted before pointing over at you. "COMPUTER! Detain the intruder in our interrogation chambers!"
"WHAT!" You stared at Zim and then looked up at the computer. "No! Not there! Nowhere that has the words 'Interrogation', 'Torture' or 'Vivisection' in it! Or the words 'Raw Sewage', 'Nuclear' or 'Electrical Hazard' either."

"She said she doesn't wanna." The computer responded.

"UGH. FINE THEN!" Zim shouted back before standing on top of the bookshelf. "Then! Send her to the lower Waiting Chambers until I can think of something better!"
"What?" You quirked your brow at Zim and then shook your fist. "You're an idiot if you think I'm gonna-"

"Okay, that sounds like a fair compromise." The computer responded.

"WHAT!?" You stared up at the ceiling, feeling betrayed by this new AI that was strange and very intimidating. "I don't wanna go!"
"And Zim doesn't want you to leave." The computer responded before accessing the lower levels. "Don't worry. They're fairly comfortable underground quarters."

"Underground?" You stared up at the computer in horror. "How underground?"

You didn't have any time to get a response because the floor bellow you suddenly opened up. The next thing you knew, you felt your body plunge down a tube like a water park slide and a sudden rush of claustrophobic horror passed all around you.

"ZIM!" You shouted as you plunged down. "I'MGONNA..."

Soon your voice was out of reach. As Zim sat up on top of the bookshelf and Finley continued to bark up at him, his brow furrowed.

'A human has come into my Base and wrestled control from me. Right under my antenna while my back was turned. Who knows what secrets she might have already discovered! What plots she has to use all of my Bases' equipment to undermine my mission!' Zim seethed. The image of your defiant face. Your undermining attitude. Your self assured confidence and boldness. He HATED you. 'I must take care of this TONIGHT...'