The Uzumaki do not, unfortunately, have prior knowledge of any sort of living, probably sentient chakra leeches. They are, however, willing to share their knowledge in an attempt to figure out just what it is. He refused to let them take any of his blood or chakra, knowing what Uzumaki can do even with such a small edge like that. He may want to solve this problem but he's not willing to give his second life or his freedom for it. Besides their seals, though, their labs are horribly lacking.
"Please remove your sand son from the room," a shinobi says tiredly. As a non-Uzumaki, Tobirama can imagine the poor guy gets overwhelmed quite often by the Uzumaki crazy.
"He's not my son," Tobirama informs, helpfully leaving out that Shukaku is, in fact, older than both of them. The shinobi gives him an unimpressed look. When he glances at his so-called sand son, Shukaku just gives him wide, watery eyes. He turns back to the shinobi, arching a brow.
"I will cry on you," the shinobi threatens and he really does look like he might cry.
"Shukaku, please go wait with Matatabi and Ayame." Shukaku leaves with the most dejected face and Tobirama's heart breaks. The shinobi looks pathetically relieved, though, so it balances out.
"Thank you," he whispers. More loudly, "does the leech have any adverse affects beyond the obvious?"
"Not as far as I can tell, although it has proved unwilling to any removal attempts."
"...unwilling?" Oh, this kid wasn't told about it's weird almost-sentience, was he?
"Unwilling," Tobirama confirms. "Aggressive." The shinobi stares at him for a long moment before groaning.
"I'm too sober for this."
"At least you don't have to live with it."
"I would say I pity you," the shinobi says dryly, "but that would be a scourge on my so far spotless lying record." Tobirama wonders for a moment if he means that he never lies or that he never tells a bad lie before discarding it because he really doesn't care after all. The shinobi rubs at his eyes with one hand.
"It doesn't, I don't know, talk to you or anything, right?" Tobirama hums thoughtfully.
"Like telling me to kill you?" He asks as an example. He realizes that this probably isn't the example to use but it's too late to go back now. Anyway, the reaction is bound to be fun. The shinobi stares at him for a long moment.
"Well?" He demands after a moment. Tobirama arches a brow. "Kill me." Oh no.
"I wasn't-"
"Do it, coward." Tobirama is honestly sort of concerned for this man.
"...Do you need a drink?" He asks. Why can't the shinobi be a child? Children are so much easier to console.
"Desperately," the man informs, standing. "I would offer to bring you with me but you have children and children and alcohol are a bad combination." And with that, the man leaves Tobirama alone. A bit of a stupid thing to do, considering he's still a nuke nin and all, but whatever. He's not complaining. He might leave a scroll on proper security protocol on the Uzukage's desk, though.
Tobirama leaves the room, not very surprised to find Shukaku and Matatabi waiting for him. Ayame is laying flat out on the cool floor, Matatabi plastered to her side as she grooms the sand from her brother's fur. Mito's presence is marginally more unexpected, watching him with an unimpressed look.
"You may want to schedule therapy for the young shinobi that was just in here. He needs it."
"I'll keep that in mind," she says. He knows she probably won't but it's a nice gesture anyways. Shukaku tugs at his sleeve and he absentmindedly hefts the bijuu-turned-boy up, resting him on his hip.
"Is there something you needed?" He asks.
"Can't I want to talk to an old friend?" She asks. Tobirama gives her a flat look to which she smiles. It falls away after a moment, replaced by seriousness.
"The Uzukage wanted to speak with you," she says.
"Alright," he agrees. Not that he has much of a choice. Besides, he'll have to meet with the Uzukage eventually if he wants to stay here for long. "Let's go, shall we?"
