Chapter Four: A Visit From Gale
"I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too. So we're really not that different, me and you."
-Colin Raye
As I approach, I see Gale and Prim sitting together under a huge maple tree. They've set cans up in a row on an old block of wood and are taking turns tossing rocks to knock them down.
Prim laughs as she hits her target and Gale gives her a high-five before he takes his turn, his grey eyes narrowed in concentration. I notice that his dark hair is cut short.
He looks like a giant beside Prim.
I look around and I'm relieved to see Snow's truck is still gone. At least I don't have to deal with him right now. I don't want this dream of a day to turn into a nightmare.
"Katniss!" Prim is the first to see me. She springs up and runs over, nearly knocking me over as she wraps her tiny arms around my waist. The bag of buns are knocked to the ground. "I was really worried! You were gone for so long!"
"I'm perfectly fine, Prim. Just got held up for a bit," I reassure, feeling her body shaking. "It'll be alright." I rub her back and glance over at Gale.
"Hey," he says, frowning. "Everything been okay?"
I shrug. "Well, we're alive at least."
"Snow still being Snow?" His face hardens as he crosses his arms.
I nod, steadying my hands on Prim's shoulders.
He lets out a heavy breath and shakes his head. I know he wants to let a string of expletives out, but he's refraining because of my sister. Gale has always had a lot of rage since his father died. I can't really blame him. He was forced to take responsibility for his entire family from a young age. Like me, he had no choice in the matter. His mother went into a deep depression after the sudden death of her husband, much like my own mother, and resorted to alcohol and drugs as a way of escape.
She attempted to find work and managed to get a few part-time minimum wage jobs here and there, but in the last couple years her health has deteriorated so much that she couldn't work even if she wanted to.
Gale has had to shoulder all of the responsibility, taking care of his siblings and making sure all of the bills get paid. As soon as he turned sixteen, he had to drop out of school and pick up two jobs, and he's been working them ever since. I rarely get to see him anymore because of it, but I understand why.
We've known each other since we were young; our fathers used to be great friends. We grew up together, but he couldn't stand me when we were children. He annoyed me too, so I went out of my way to annoy him back as much as possible. We pretty much hated each other. It wasn't until our fathers died that we became friends.
At first, it was more about survival. We'd go hunting and fishing together, mostly in silence. We didn't want to be alone; somehow just knowing we didn't have to face everything by ourselves brought a little comfort to the situation.
We were neighbors then. It was actually through Gale's mother that my own mother met Snow. My mom didn't know it at the time, but he was coming by to supply Gale's mom with drugs. He'd come over and talk with my mother, and shortly after he began showering her with things such as food, clothes, and eventually the occasional rose.
He treated me and Prim decently at the time, but it was all an act. He saw my mom's weakness and preyed upon it. He knew that she would get life insurance and settlement money from my father's death. And my mom and her two children seemed like less of a hassle to him than Gale's mother and her four children. After all, two little girls would be a lot easier to control than three boys and a girl, especially since Gale was already the same size as Snow at the time.
My mother, however, was intent on not marrying again.
I didn't think she'd ever get over my father. She cried all the time and would stay in bed all day, hibernating under the covers or occasionally writing in some old journal. In an effort to cheer her up, I'd go out into the woods and pick bouquets of wildflowers. She'd give me a small smile that didn't quite meet her eyes and place them in a Mason jar, where she'd seemingly forget about them. Every day I'd notice them wither further, until they were shriveling, darkened husks that only held the memory of beauty, of life... but the essence was gone. And, for the most part, so was my mother. My dad had died, but she had become the ghost.
It wasn't until she found out she was pregnant that things changed.
Snow proposed to her, and since he seemed like an okay guy, she said yes. It would be the worst mistake of her life - of all of our lives.
They didn't even have a real wedding; they just went to a courthouse and got married. And then the real Snow started to make an appearance shortly after.
He bought the shabby trailer we live in now and moved it a small distance away from where we used to live. It's about a mile down a gravel road, off of another main gravel road. We're placed in the middle of a field behind a gate and barbed wire, with no one else around. No one could, or can, hear our screams and cries, and I'm pretty sure that's what he was going for.
It took him no time at all to spend every dime my mom got from my dad's death. He spent it on stupid things like drugs and a couple of old cars that he blew the motors up in for fun.
My mom would fight back with him then. He'd beat her every day; he didn't care that she was pregnant. I was only twelve, but I'd try to take up for my mom, throwing my arms around his neck, trying to pull him off of her, tossing anything at him that my small hands could find. He'd turn around and start to hurt me instead.
I remember the first major injury he gave me: he grabbed my arm and twisted it until it snapped. The pain was excruciating, and I couldn't use my arm for a long time. Mom had prior experience as a nurse and tried to reset it as best she could, placing it in an old sling we had. They never took me to the hospital. I think Mom wanted to, but she was afraid Child Services would be called and we'd be taken from her.
She tried to get away hundreds of times in the beginning, though, but she didn't have anywhere to go and no one she could rely on. Her own parents weren't any help; there had been a rift between them ever since she married my father. I haven't seen them much as I've grown up, but the few times I did they certainly didn't seem warm or loving.
Each time we had to come back to Snow, the abuse got worse.
I never said anything because I was afraid. I didn't want to lose my mom or my little sister. Snow made sure to fill my head with horrible stories of kids being abused and murdered by adoptive and foster families. I know now that most of those tales were lies to keep me from talking.
Her mind started slipping after the death of my father, and deteriorated further with Snow beating on us. He'd also imply that he had poisoned her food and drinks (which he might have)– causing her to avoid eating and drinking. He'd force her to take pills that made her sleep for days and caused her to lose her memory more and more.
The final straw was when he dragged her by the hair around the trailer. Her seven-months-pregnant belly hit a stump with force, but this didn't make him stop. Instead, he started kicking her repeatedly until she passed out. He wouldn't take her to the hospital either, no matter how much Prim and I begged.
A couple days later, she went into labor. She gave birth to a baby boy. I don't really know all of the details since I was so young, but I do know that she held him in her arms until he took his last breath. He only lived for an hour until he succumbed to the injuries Snow had inflicted. Mom told the doctors she had been in a car accident and that's how the baby got so hurt inside of her, and I guess they felt so bad about her situation that they never questioned it.
As a result of what happened, the doctors put her on strong antidepressants - but all it did was make her numb to the world. She wouldn't speak to or acknowledge me and Prim anymore. Snow kept drugging her with sleeping pills. He felt no remorse for my baby brother dying or my mother losing her mind because of it. I think he actually felt proud of himself.
Mom hasn't been the same since - in fact, she's gotten much worse. I know she'll never be normal again. The loving, doting mother I remember from when I was child is dead. All I have now is a body that resembles her.
Gale's voice brings me back to the present. "I have some things for you two," he tells me, suddenly excited. He walks over to the truck and pulls out two trash bags from the back. Prim pulls away from me and looks at him with wide, curious eyes.
"What's this?" I ask him.
"The thrift shop next to my job threw a bunch of clothes out into the dumpster. I got them out after everything closed. There were about six bags, but I kept what my brothers and sister could use. I tried to guess both of your sizes; thought you could use something with school coming up and all. Some might not fit, but I figured you could use the fabric for something useful."
Prim runs over and rips open a bag; she lifts a couple of t-shirts out and smiles widely. Before Gale can react, she attacks him with a hug. "Thank you, Gale! Thank you, thank you…" I know this little gesture means the world to her. She was really worried about the clothes situation, and truthfully, so was I. I'm a little relieved to know we'll at least have something semi-new to wear next week. It might not be the latest fashion or even very pretty, but it's different and in decent shape – and that's all that matters.
Gale chuckles softly and pats her on the head.
"That's quite all right, Prim. Just trying to help."
"Prim, why don't you take these clothes inside? I need to talk to Gale alone," I tell her quickly, remembering about the job. I need to get Gale's opinion, and I'm also bursting to tell someone the news.
She turns to me with a look of defiance, her bottom lip sticking out slightly as if I've just scolded her. I reach down for the brown paper bag and open it, retrieving a cinnamon bun. Her eyes immediately light up as I hand it to her; she doesn't hesitate to grab it from me and bite into it. "Fankoo," she manages with the food in her mouth.
"You're welcome," I reply. Then, with the remainder of the cinnamon bun tight between her teeth, she hefts the two trash bags up as much as she can and makes her way to the house. As she disappears from view, I turn to Gale.
"What's going on, Kat?"
"I got a job today," I answer. I say it almost as if I'm confused, and honestly... I am. I didn't set out today to find employment, but I'm very thankful for it. I'm a little nervous about the prospect of having to deal with Mrs. Mellark and her other two sons, but compared to Snow, they're minor annoyances.
"That's great!" Gale says excitedly and hugs me before I can stop him. I go stiff in his arms, and he finally pulls back and looks at me a with a frown. "You're worried about Snow, right?"
I nod and rub my eyes. "I'm afraid to tell him."
Gale heaves a sigh and scratches his head. "Want me to stick around for when you do?"
"No," I reply, shaking my head slowly in contemplation. "It'll only make him mad and he'll make it worse later. You know that."
"I wish I could get you guys out of here."
"I know, but you can't. It wouldn't do any good, anyway. The police would just bring us right back and you'd get in trouble for kidnapping or some stupid trumped up charge…."
"You know, we should just do what we talked about before. Just take our brothers and sisters and run off into the woods—"
"And then what? Starve to death? Freeze to death? Get mauled by a wild animal? Get caught and charged for kidnapping minors? It would never work, Gale. They'd find us, or we'd die, and I don't know which alternative would be worse."
This is how it's always been for us. We try to comfort each other with dreams of escape and then get frustrated when we realize how hopeless it is.
"Where are you going to work?" he asks in a calmer tone. He looks straight ahead, his brows furrowed.
"The Mellark bakery," I say. He glances at me suddenly, his eyes wide with disbelief. "I know. I'm surprised too. I just went to sell some blackberries and Mr. Mellark offered me the job." I shrug.
"He's a good man," Gale replies thoughtfully. "His sons are assholes, but he's alright. I think it's a good thing to work for him. Just don't let the boys get to you."
I nod. "Peeta's not bad, though."
"The bread?" Gale asks me, looking confused. I can't help but smile slightly as I shake my head.
"No. His youngest son. The one that lost his leg?" I explain, trying to refresh his memory. He scrunches up his face as if trying to remember.
"Don't really remember him, but I recall hearing about that. He's about your age, huh?"
"Yeah. We've had a lot of the same classes. He's really kind of sweet." I lift the brown bag. "He gave me this sack of bread buns and cinnamon rolls today." I open it up and hand Gale a cheese bun. He hesitates at first, looking suspicious, but finally takes it from me.
"So do you like him?" There's a slight edge to his voice, and I'm not sure what to think of it.
"I barely even know him, Gale," I answer defensively. "Anyway, what does it matter to you if I did? I don't, not like that. But still…."
Gale turns to me and shrugs. "It doesn't, really. I just don't want to see you get hurt. Merchant boys have no shortage of girls that chase after them, especially the Mellarks. Or at least the older two didn't. I'm just saying, keep your guard up. Don't trust them."
I don't respond. I just cross my arms and stare at the ground. As if I needed Gale to remind me not to trust. I don't think I'll have a problem with that.
"Anyways, I better go before Snow gets back. I don't want to get you in trouble," Gale says after a few moments and opens the door of his truck.
"You think you could give me a ride into town before Monday? To get Prim some shoes and school supplies? I'll pay for gas," I ask quickly.
Gale lets out a heavy breath and nods. "I work tomorrow and the next day. I might be able to do it Sunday evening. And don't worry about the gas, okay?"
"Thank you."
