Chapter Nine: Misunderstanding

"The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man be perfected without trials."

-Danish Proverb

"And what did you tell him?"

I really don't think she knows the answers to any of those questions he supposedly asked her, as we don't normally sit around discussing favorite colors, foods, or boys. Well, not until now.

"I didn't say anything. I just said I didn't know," she answers with a yawn.

"Good." If Peeta wants to know things about me, he needs to ask me - not my little sister.

Even if I choose to believe what she's saying, I have no clue why he'd be asking those things. In any case, I'm not going to dwell on it because he was probably only making small talk and didn't mean any more by it.

All thoughts of Peeta are cast aside anyway as soon as I see Snow's truck parked in front of the trailer.

With an ominous tug in my stomach, I reach for the front door. I try to open it, but it won't budge. My heart pounds as I try to turn the knob again.

Nope, it's not going anywhere.

"Damnit! He locked us out again," I mutter to Prim.

I know better than to knock. He won't let us inside. He did this on purpose, and it's not the first time either. He's done this more times than I can count. If I knock, he'll just hurt me and throw me back out again.

I'm really not in the mood to deal with this tonight.

I knew the happiness I was feeling wouldn't last long.

"Are we going to have to sleep outside tonight?" Prim asks with a slight tremor. I know the thought of it scares her to death. We live in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by thick woods. There are sounds of wild animals, and things moving in the bushes and tall grass all around us. Needless to say, the few times we did sleep outside, we didn't get much sleep at all.

I shake my head. We can't do this during school. Prim needs her rest.

"No, we're not." I start to walk away, but she stands there with a questioning look on her face. "Well, come on!"

She quickly catches up to me. "Where are we going?"

I know only one place we can go. "The Hawthornes'."

Gale's family lives about a mile away from us, so it takes a little while to get there. I'm not sure of the exact time, but I'm guessing it's well after eleven by the time we reach the house. Prim looks ready to pass out on the doorstep. I feel like I might collapse at any moment, myself.

I don't even hesitate before knocking hard on the door. I know I won't be turned away here; this place has become a second home over the years. However, I try not to make a habit of showing up like this, because I know Gale has enough on his plate without me and Prim being added into the mix.

Gale opens the door after a few minutes, looking as if I'd woken him up. I probably did.

"Snow locked us out again." This has happened so many times before, I know I don't have to say anything else. He sighs heavily, looking annoyed and angry as he opens the door for us.

As soon as we're inside, he turns to Prim. "You can go on to Posy's room. Try not to wake her up, okay?"

She nods quickly, her eyes barely open, and throws her arms around his waist.

"Thanks for letting us stay."

"It's all right, Prim. Now go try to get some sleep for school," he says, patting her on the back. She tells me goodnight, then makes her way down the narrow hallway to Posy's room.

I look around me and see that everything is pretty much the same as the last time I was here. His house isn't much fancier than mine, but at least he has some old furniture, a TV, water, a stove, and electricity. Other than that, you can barely see the floor from all of the old laundry, trash, and dirty dishes lying about. Gale's mom doesn't really do any cleaning due to her health, and the kids don't concern themselves with it. Gale is always working, so when he does get home he usually heads straight to bed. I can't blame him for it and I'm not one to judge. I'm just thankful to be under a roof right now.

I notice his two brothers, ages ten and fourteen, fast asleep on the fold-out couch. Gale places his finger to his lips as we walk past them to his room.

Once inside, he closes the door and turns to me. His bedroom is kind of plain, but a lot nicer than mine. He doesn't have anything on the walls, but he has a chest of drawers and a queen-sized bed, which is a lot more comfortable than sleeping on a small cot. Clothes are strewn across the floor, but I can't recall a time they weren't. We both know how the other lives, and we know we don't have to apologize for anything. It's just how things are.

I know a lot of people would get the wrong impression, with me sleeping in the same bed with Gale, but it's nothing sexual. We just sleep and that's it. We've been sleeping in the same bed since we were children and we really don't think much of it. We're more like brother and sister and we both know anything more than that would be out of the question. It's always been an unspoken thing between us.

Besides, if Gale wanted more than friendship from me, he would have said so long ago; he's not exactly shy or timid. Not that I would ever want that. I don't think I could ever feel more than platonic feelings for him. We've known each other for far too long, and it'd honestly be way too weird.

"So how was your first day on the job?" he asks as I settle down on the bed and begin to take off my shoes and socks. He sits down beside me and yawns.

I shrug and can't help the small smile that curves my lips, despite the latter events of tonight.

"Really great, actually." My face heats up a bit as I add, "Peeta taught me how to knead bread dough."

Gale frowns and arches an eyebrow as if he's unimpressed.

"Is it really all that hard?"

"It doesn't seem like it would be, but yeah," I reply. "Peeta showed me a way that made it really simple though."

"How's that?"

"With our hands. Here, I'll show you," I begin to explain, gesturing for him to lift his hands, palms up, the way Peeta showed me. Gale looks at me as if I'm being totally stupid. "Put out your palms. Like this." I show him with my own hands.

He does, but he doesn't seem to really care. In fact, he looks a little annoyed and impatient. I place my palms onto his and push down the way I did with Peeta, but it feels so much more different. Gale's hands are rough, rigid, and cold; so unlike Peeta's, which were gentle, soft, and warm. It's just not the same at all. Gale asks in a bored voice after a moment, "What the hell are you doing?"

"This is how I was taught to knead dough. Peeta says it's all about using your palms…." I press down a few more times, but this is just pointless. I feel like an absolute idiot, and Gale is looking at me as if I am too.

"Um, no offense… but this is kind of weird, Katniss," he says, shaking his head. He quickly retrieves his hands from under mine, then moves up on the bed to lie down. I do the same on the opposite side, feeling a little dejected. He turns to me, his brows furrowed. "You sure it just wasn't a reason for him to touch your hands?"

"No it wasn't, Gale!" I roll my eyes and add defensively, "And it worked really well, actually. It's just not the same here, with you. You're not patient like he is."

"Yeah, not really. I find baking to be a huge waste of time. If I want bread, I'll just buy some from a store," Gale retorts, pulling the covers up to his shoulders. I do the same, feeling somewhat angry with him now. He's silent for a moment, then tells me, "By the way, it feels like hand humping. You basically just had hand sex with dough boy."

"Whatever! It wasn't like that at all! You're such a huge asshole sometimes, you know that?"

Seriously, it wasn't like that at all between me and Peeta, and I'm mortified that he'd even say such a thing. It was totally innocent; Peeta was just teaching me how to knead and Gale's making it into some sordid thing.

"Yeah, yeah. Get over it and go to sleep," he mumbles, flipping over onto his side, away from me. I sigh in frustration, then turn over onto my side as well. Our backs facing each other, as always. It takes a few hours for me to fall asleep, however. I can't stop thinking about everything. I think about Snow, how horrible things are, how I want to improve them, and how it seems impossible. And then I think of Peeta, Mr. Mellark, the bakery, and how much I want to be there instead of here. I felt safe and happy there. I felt wanted and needed.

I feel as if my eyes had only just closed when I'm awakened by Gale the next morning.

We don't say anything to each other since I'm still annoyed with him. He doesn't seem to care or even notice, though. He has too many other things to worry about, like getting his brothers and sister up and ready for school.

Prim borrows an outfit from Posy for the day. Posy is twelve and slightly bigger than Prim. Her clothes hang really loose on her, but it's better than wearing the same thing she did yesterday. I don't have anything to wear besides what I had on the day prior, until I remember I have my work uniform folded up in my backpack. No one will know it's a work uniform besides Peeta, and I don't think he's going to tell anyone. I'm not sure how I'll explain it, but I'll think of something.

I ride the bus into town, taking the opportunity to sleep a little bit along the way.

I walk into class, find the same table in the very back as I did yesterday, and sit down. I put my arms on the desk and place my head down on them, closing my eyes for a few moments.

I must have drifted off to sleep, however, because the next thing I know there's a hand rubbing my back and a familiar voice near my ear, "Katniss, you should really wake up before class starts."

I open my eyes slowly and see Peeta beside me, looking concerned. I don't feel like dealing with him this morning. I'm too tired for this. I sigh, sit up, and rub my eyes. His hand is still on my back, rubbing it soothingly. I want to tell him to stop, but it feels too good, so I choose to ignore it.

He leans in next to my ear again. "Why are you wearing your work uniform?"

"Because I like it," I shrug and look away, indicating I don't want to talk anymore about it.

Peeta seems to buy this explanation because he simply smiles and says, "Oh, okay. I was just curious."

The girls that were giggling and talking about us yesterday are back at it again today. I'm sure it's not improving anything with Peeta's hand still on my back. I don't really care though, they're going to talk badly about me regardless. I might as well enjoy something out of it.

Peeta and I don't speak much throughout class; we don't really get the chance. However, at the end of class he asks me, "Are you okay? You don't seem like you're feeling very well. Maybe you should go see the nurse."

I shake my head.

"No. I'm fine. I'm just really tired. I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Why?" He has that concerned look on his face again. "You can tell me—"

"I just couldn't sleep well, okay?" I reply quickly, looking away. "Anyways, I need to get to 2nd hour. I'll see you later."

"Okay," he says slowly. "I really hope you feel better, Katniss."

I don't talk to Peeta the rest of the day.

I see him talking to Delly in class after lunch, but I choose to avoid looking in their direction as much as possible. I arrive late for last hour so we're not obligated to sit next to each other. It's not that I don't like being around Peeta or talking to him. I'm just not in the mood to deal with other people today. I'd rather remain invisible and not have attention drawn to us.

Finally, it's the end of the day and I'm riding in the car with Peeta. He says a few things to me, but I'm so tired that I really don't hear any of it. We pick up Prim and then head straight to the bakery.

I'm happy to be in the bakery again, but I'm nervous. I only became more exhausted throughout the day, and I lack motivation and enthusiasm to learn anything. Peeta seems to understand this, because as soon as his dad leaves he comes over to me, looking concerned.

"Look, it's a slow night and I can handle things on my own, okay? I know you're not feeling well, Katniss. Why don't you go upstairs and lay down for a bit?" he offers quietly.

I look at him in defiance. "I'm fine. I can work—"

He shakes his head and looks at me with a frown.

"No, I won't let you. You'll still get paid and everything. No one will know about this besides us. There's a bed upstairs, okay? Please, go get some rest."

"Why is there a bed upstairs?" I ask, finding it a bit odd.

He hesitates for a moment before letting out a breath. "Honestly? My mom and dad don't really have a very happy marriage," he says. "Dad sleeps here sometimes. Just don't tell anyone I told you that, okay?"

I nod, not really knowing what to say. I'm not all that surprised by it. Mrs. Mellark doesn't really seem like she'd be a treat to live with, never mind share a bed with.

"Now, go get some rest," he tells me in a stern yet caring tone. "I'll wake you if I need you, but right now all I really need is for you to feel better. Don't worry about Prim. She'll be perfectly okay. I'll probably have her come back and help me decorate or something. I'll just tell her you're off running an errand for me."

I nod again, and he shows me where the staircase is.

When I'm upstairs, I notice that it's kind of like a small apartment. Or it could be... or used to be. There are boxes, storage, and baking equipment taking up most of the space now.

Although I feel curious, I don't really look around much. I'm simply far too tired for it and, besides, it'd be kind of nosy. I quickly find the door that Peeta told me to look for and push it open, finding a big, fully made bed inside. I waste no time before crawling in and enveloping myself in its soft warmth.

I fall asleep as fast as my head lands on the pillow.

"Katniss! Wake up…." I hear Peeta's voice.

"Hmmm…?" I sit up and look at him groggily. "What?"

He's looking very strangely at me, probably because my hair is an absolute mess.

"Someone's here that wants to see you," he says, frowning. "I told him you were busy, but he's insisting."

"Who is it?" I ask as I quickly get out of bed. My stomach feels queasy all of a sudden. "Did he say?"

He shakes his head and looks away. "I didn't ask and he didn't say. Sorry."

I let out a long breath, trying to calm my nerves a little. I quickly undo my hair, running my fingers through it to straighten all the tangles out, before quickly rebraiding it. Peeta is still standing there, studying me with that same strange look in his face.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" I finally ask.

"No reason," he answers, stuffing his hands into his pockets. He starts to walk out of the room, then turns back to me and says quietly, "I can't remember seeing you with your hair down before. It's... nice. You have nice hair, I mean."

I don't know what to say to that, so I just shrug. I'm too nervous and scared, wondering who could be waiting for me and hoping it isn't Snow, that I can't really think of anything else. I follow him down the stairs in silence until I'm finally in the store front.

Oh, thank goodness. It's not Snow at all. But still someone I really didn't expect to see… Gale.

I narrow my eyes at him and cross my arms. I'm still annoyed with him, and I don't feel like talking to him after what he said about me and Peeta last night. My face burns just thinking about it. I hope he doesn't bring it up here; that would be pretty embarrassing to have to explain.

Gale walks over to me. "Were you just sleeping?"

"Maybe. I didn't get much sleep last night, did I?" I loftily reply. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I can't stay long." He sighs loudly and looks around. "Can we talk in private?"

I glance over at Peeta, who isn't really making it a secret that he's watching us. He raises his eyebrows in question, but I'm not about to answer. I shake my head, knowing that asking to take a break or talk to Gale in private would be pushing his kindness too far.

"Just say what you need to real quick. I already took my break."

"Fine." Gale lowers his voice slightly, but not much. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being so rough last night and for not saying anything to you this morning. I've just had a lot going on lately, and you're right, I was being an asshole."

"Yeah, you were," I agree. I feel Peeta's gaze on us and I just want to get Gale out of here as soon as possible. It just doesn't seem right, him being here. I feel like my worlds are mixing and I don't like it at all." But I forgive you. I understand. You need to go though. I really need to get back to work."

It takes me totally by surprise when he hugs me. I don't hug back though; I just push hard against his chest to get him to release me, which he does rather quickly. I shake my head, feeling embarrassed and perturbed. "Not here. I'm at work, Gale."

He knows that I don't like to be hugged normally, and most definitely not in public. He's starting to get on my nerves all over again.

"Sorry," he says again. "Anyways, Posy asked if Prim could come over this evening. I said it's okay with me if it's okay with you."

"Sure," I answer quickly, wanting this conversation to end. I feel very uncomfortable, knowing Peeta can hear everything we're saying. I don't want Gale to mention anything about how we live. "I'll come by to get her later, after I'm done here."

"So we're cool?" Gale asks, raising his eyebrows. I nod and cross my arms again. "Sorry you didn't get much sleep last night. You know my bed is always open to you, anytime you need it, right?"

I nod again, but I don't say anything. I can only wonder what Peeta must think of all of this.

When Gale and Prim leave, I don't really know how to explain my encounter with Gale to Peeta. He doesn't ask about it, so I decide not to say anything. He's silent for the rest of the night, like he has something on his mind, but I don't ask. It's none of my business.

I clean tables, sweep, and help him get rid of expired baked goods. We work normally, but things seem really weird between us. I'm not sure why. He's not being mean to me, but there's a noticeable change about him.

Then it dawns on me…

He hasn't smiled once since Gale left. In fact, he's been frowning.

After we close up for the night and we're in the car on the way home, he finally breaks the awkward silence between us.

"Hey, I don't want you to think I was eavesdropping or anything, but I couldn't help but overhear you and that older guy that came into the bakery earlier tonight—" he starts a bit hesitantly, keeping his eyes on the road.

"Gale?"

"Yeah, I guess," he replies. "I don't mean to be nosy, but did I hear right? That you're sleeping with him?"

"It's not really a big deal or anything!" I blurt, my face reddening. "We just sleep together, that's all. We've been doing it for years."

"Does it happen often?" He's biting his lip, but other than that, I can't really read his face in the dark.

I swallow hard and shrug my shoulders, feeling awkward and self-conscious to be talking about this with Peeta. We barely know each other, after all.

"We used to all the time, but not so much anymore. It only happens occasionally," I try to explain, intentionally leaving out Snow as the main reason why. I'm not ready to explain that to Peeta, and hopefully I'll never have to. He looks a little confused, so I feel like I should clarify that it's not what he's probably thinking. "We're only friends though, nothing more than that. In case you're wondering."

"Oh," Peeta says quickly, as if he finally gets what I'm saying. "So it's just a casual thing?"

"Yeah, I guess. It's nothing fancy." I suppose it's considered casual, though it's not a regular habit. I definitely wouldn't call sleeping in Gale's bed fancy in the least, though.

"I see," Peeta says, then adds as an afterthought, "Well, I think you deserve fancy."

"I'll take what I can get." I let out a small cynical laugh.

He goes silent again and seems to be very concerned with his driving, his eyes narrowed in concentration. There's fog out in patches, and I know it must be hard to see very well.

We don't say anything else until I see Gale's house coming up.

"You can let me out here," I tell him suddenly. He stops the car and I get out without another word said between us. I turn back to him. "There's no need to wait around. Gale will give us a lift back home from here. Thanks again for the ride, Peeta, and for… everything else tonight. I really appreciate it."

He doesn't say anything, only nods and looks straight ahead.

I begin to walk off towards the house, but then I hear Peeta call out, "Hey, Katniss?"

I walk a little closer to the car. "Yeah?"

He seems to hesitate at first, but finally faces me. He's frowning still, and I somehow know he's going to tell me something I don't want to hear. He releases a long breath and then says quickly, "I'm not trying to be mean or anything, so don't take it that way, but I don't think it's a good idea to be sleeping around on weekdays. Not if it makes you too tired for school and work. I also think he's way too old for you. And you shouldn't have Prim around when you're doing this."

I let his words sink in for a moments, my eyes slowly widening in shock. Oh my god. He thinks that Gale and I are having sex. Casually. That's what he'd meant earlier. Oh no. No, no, no! This isn't happening. I should have clarified things more. Peeta must think horrible things about me now.

"Wait… what? Peeta!" I sputter in shock. I don't even know where to begin. "Oh god! No. It's not like that at all! We only sleep—"

"I don't need the details," Peeta cuts me off. "It's none of my business. Look, it's late and I need to get home. Try to get some sleep tonight, okay?" He says a bit hastily, and before I can say anything else, he's already driving away.

I stand there for a couple minutes, wondering what the hell just happened.