A surprise story from Starpion!

Yes, I understand this is a bit of an unusual crossover concept (considering my track record, however, that's not exactly surprising). One type of fanfiction I've always liked are reaction fics, and I've always wanted to write one. So why these two series? Well, I had an idea for a crossover between the two that I doubted would get anywhere, so I took inspiration from one of my favorite reaction fics, Peeking Through the Fourth Wall by MrTyeDye. Seriously, go check it out on DeviantArt, you won't be disappointed. As for JJBA, it's one of my favorite anime of all time, and considering just how, for lack of a better term, bizarre the series is, I think having the Louds react to it will be a lot of fun.

There's also another reason for why I'm writing a story like this, and that's practice for my Kamen Rider fics. Specifically, I want to work on believable character interaction and dynamic fight scenes. In the case of the former, I'm always worried that the dialogue in Koihime Duel is too stiff or OOC, and I have a much harder time with the character interactions than the duels, which come pretty naturally to me. A reaction fic will definitely help with that, especially since I know these characters pretty well. As for the latter, well, the nature of Koihime Duel and Yu-Gi-Oh in general means that most of the action scenes I've written are much more static. This works for Yu-Gi-Oh (and Koihime Musou, to a lesser extent, since the VNs are strategy games), but for RWBY and Kamen Rider, two series famous for well-done, fluid, and awesomely over-the-top fights? Inexcusable. So while JoJo is still a bit static compared to those, I feel like describing dynamic fight scenes is good practice for writing my own.

Anyway, I've rambled for more than enough time. Let's get into it!

Disclaimer: I own neither of the series. The Loud House is owned by Nickelodeon, Viacom, and Michael Rubiner, and was created by Chris Savino. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is owned by Hirohiko Araki, Shueisha, Viz Media, and David Production. None of this is for profit.


The Royal Woods Mall being busy on a Friday afternoon was nothing new. It may not have been as crowded as the weekend, or heaven forbid the holiday season that left many employees traumatized, but there were still hundreds of patrons checking out the various stores and restaurants. Whether the mall goers were looking for or going to a part-time job, doing some afternoon shopping, or simply blowing off steam after a long day of school or work, people seemed to always flock to the mall for one reason or another. And two of those mall goers were a woman named Rita Loud and her only son, Lincoln.

As the blonde-haired mother of eleven walked through the mall while checking a map every now and then, her white-haired son turned to the side and gave a smile and wave. "Hey, I almost didn't see you guys there! You're probably wondering why the two of us are at the mall. More specifically, ONLY the two of us. Well, a couple weeks ago, to raise funds for a spring field trip, our elementary school had us sell raffle tickets. I know, not very exciting, right? But today, the fundraiser ended, and everyone who sold enough got prizes! And since I managed to sell fifty bucks of them, no doubt due to my natural charm," he added with a wink while pointing his thumbs at himself, "I got to pick a $50 gift card from a selection they had, and I got this!"

Lincoln then dug into his pocket and pulled out his Ace Savvy wallet (one of his top ten most prized possessions), opened it with a flick of the wrist, and pulled out a gift card. On the front side were the letters "FYA" on a film reel. "Fifty dollars worth of spending at For Your Amusement! And my mom was cool enough to take me here after we dropped my sisters off at home!" As he put the card and wallet away, he scratched the back of his head. "I can't remember the last time I went to the mall with only my parents. Usually I'm either acting as a chaperone and/or pack mule for my sisters or helping them with whatever problem they've run into that week."

"We're here, sweetie," said Rita, jerking Lincoln back into reality as they stood in front of the video store, the same insignia on his gift card plastered onto the entrance with fluorescent writing. "Just let me know when you've found something you want to get. And please don't take too long, your father and I are going to dinner with friends tonight."

"Gotcha, mom!" said Lincoln with a thumbs-up before he sprinted into the store, almost knocking over another customer. Rita sighed with a tired smile before heading over to the music section. While they were both here, she might as well browse for herself, right?

For the next few minutes, Lincoln was checking out the whole store, trying to figure out what to get with his hard-earned gift card. There were movies, TV shows, CDs, T-shirts, figurines, posters, and more as far as the eye could see. Eventually, he found himself in the anime part of the TV section. While Lincoln preferred Western cartoons and comics, he wasn't completely put off by anime, so he shrugged and decided to check it out. He was beginning to consider going back to the live-action shows and getting the latest season of ARGGH! on Blu-ray, when something caught his eye. It was a Blu-ray pack with an oddly colored, muscular man on the front, performing an odd pose. Underneath him was the title: "JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Set 1."

"JoJo's Bizarre Adventure? I think I've heard Rusty mention this before," muttered Lincoln as he grabbed the box from its display. Flipping it over, he read the plot summary on the back, growing more and more excited the further he went. "An ancient battle? Supernatural threats? This sounds awesome!" Quickly making his decision, he made his way to his mom, who was looking through the country music section.

"I think I've figured out what I'm looking for! It costs sixty, but I can use my allowance for the rest!"

"That's fine, honey. What did you find?" Lincoln excitedly gave his mother the box, which she looked at before flipping it over. Once she reached the bottom of the back, however, Rita's face turned into a frown as she inhaled through her teeth. Lincoln had a bad feeling that he would have to fight for his choice.

"This says it's rated TV-14. Are you sure about this, Lincoln?"

"Come on, mom, I'm using my own money to buy it! And I can handle it!"

"You say that, but I'm not sure I can believe it," said Rita. "Remember what happened when you watched The Harvester behind our backs?"

"Yeah, but that was ages ago! I've matured since then!"

Rita's concerned look turned into a flat glare, clearly doubting her son's claims. She then closed her eyes and shrugged. "Okay, you can buy it. I'll just give Bun-Bun to Lola once we get home."

The effects of her words were immediate, as Lincoln's eyes widened to the size of saucers and he latched onto his mom with a viselike grip, causing her to let out a small cry of shock. "NO! You made your point, you made your point! Please, anything but thaaaat!" he bawled. A few customers and employees turned their heads to look at the scene the Louds were causing. Once they were aware that they were the center of attention, Lincoln quickly let go of his mother and tried to play his little freak-out off, complete with whistling, while Rita dusted her sweater off with her free hand before sighing.

"Look, I understand that you're the one paying for this, and that you really want this. So how about we make a deal?"

"Anything! What do you want, extra chores? Proofreading your novel?"

Rita bent over (she considered getting onto one knee, but who knew the last time those carpets were cleaned) and put her free hand on Lincoln's shoulder while handing the Blu-ray set to him. "You can buy this, but I want you to watch it with a chaperone. Someone who's at least fourteen, old enough to watch this on their own. Me, your father, one of your older sisters…"

"Deal!" said Lincoln, holding out his pinky, which his mom easily returned. "I promise! So can we get it now?"

"Sure, sweetie," said Rita as she grabbed a country album, and the two of them made their way to the register, the white-haired fifth grader barely able to keep his excitement to himself.

~LBR~

"Now remember, the two of us won't be back until late at night, so I expect you to take care of your siblings until then and make sure the house is still standing," said Rita, standing in the dining room with her oldest daughter, Lori standing in front of her. Lori seemed much more engaged in her phone, fingers a blur as she texted someone and occasionally nodded to her mother's conversation. Rita then pulled out her purse and grabbed a handful of bills, looking through it before placing a small pile of cash on the table. "There should be enough for five…" Rita paused, thought it over, then pulled a little more money out and added it to the stack. "Six pizzas for dinner, and you'll have to dip into your own funds for anything else."

"Yeah, mm-hm," said Lori, eyes still locked on her phone.

"Remember to keep the doors locked, and make sure that Luan gets her essay written by… Lori, are you even listening to me?"

"Yeah, totally. OMG, Tad said WHAT to Whitney?! If he thinks he can get away with this, oho, he's got another thing—"

"LORI!" shouted Rita, causing Lori to yelp in surprise, phone fumbling in her hands. "This is important! Please tell me you at least heard part of what I've been telling you!"

"Oh, you mean that you and dad won't be home until late, I can get six pizzas with this money but need to use my own money for any sides, keep the doors locked, and make sure Luan gets her paper done tonight?" listed Lori with a smirk, her mother's jaw getting wider and wider as she went on. Apparently, she had been listening the whole time.

'Note to self: Lori is a much better listener than we give her credit for.'

"Don't worry, mom, I've done this for years now, you've literally got nothing to worry about," said Lori, looking Rita in the eye for the first time since she and Lincoln got back from the mall. "You two just have a good time, I've totally got this."

"Oh, thank you Lori!" said Rita with a smile, bringing her eldest daughter in for a hug that was graciously returned. After they broke up their hug, Rita heard a buzz before pulling her cell phone out of her purse. "Oh, that's your father telling me he's closing up. Better go pick him up. Please keep your siblings out of trouble and the house in one piece!" As she said this, she made her way out the door, Lori waving at her with a smile. As soon as she heard the sound of Vanzilla pulling out of the driveway, Lori's attention went back to her phone.

At the same time, Lincoln made his way out of his small, but cozy room, a Blu-ray case in his hand. The second that Vanzilla had sputtered to a stop, he had made a break for his room to open the box set. After taking off the plastic wrap and getting the case out (under some other bonus features that he stacked on his bed for later), he made his way out of his room and down the stairs. Only four of his sisters - Lori, Leni, Luna, and Luan - were old enough to fit his mom's requirement for an appropriate chaperone, and the sooner he found one who was able and willing, the sooner he could get to enjoy the new show.

"Hey Lori! Could I ask for a favor?"

"Will I regret it later?" asked Lori, still looking at her phone.

"Uh, most likely not? Look, mom said I need someone who's at least fourteen to watch this with me, so are you up to it? Please?"

The seventeen-year-old looked away from her phone as he held the case up to her. It looked different than the box cover, showing the same muscular man on the cover, albeit he no longer looked like he was made of stained glass, along with another muscular man who Lincoln found on the back of the box behind the summary. "Look, Lincoln… "

'Well, this won't end well.'

"I'd love to watch this with you, but mom put me in charge, and I literally can't be distracted. Remember the last time I ignored my duties of watching you guys?"

Lincoln shivered as it came flooding back to him. Lori, instead of being in charge of her younger siblings, decided to watch a chick-flick marathon instead. At some point, Lola went to Lisa to soup up her toy oven, since it apparently kept undercooking whatever she made. To make a long story short, those three were grounded for a month and Lisa still wasn't allowed access to radioactive materials.

"I'll watch it with you some other time, but right now, I need to keep watch. Who knows what you guys will get into without me here?"

As if on cue, a cacophony of animal sounds and squeaky wheels closed in on the two of them as Lana, riding a skateboard being pulled by her various pets, flew by them like a race car. "Hi Lori, hi Lincoln, bye Lori, bye Lincoln!" she screamed before streaking past them. Before either of the two could react to whatever just happened, an enraged-looking Lola sped by in her Princess Car.

"LANA! When I catch you, I'll be paying you back TEN TIMES what you did!" she shrieked like a well-dressed harpy, before Lori growled.

"Like this, for instance. Excuse me." Lori then sprinted after the twins, yelling various threats as Lincoln slowly made his way up the stairs.

"Well, guess Lori's out, but that's okay, she's busy. I've still got three out of four, and Leni is way too nice to refuse."

As he made his way to Lori and Leni's room, he was about to put his hand on the doorknob before he jerked his arm back like it tried to bite him. While Leni had no problem with being in her room, and Lori had eased up a bit when it came to going into her room without permission (at the very least, the security system was removed), he had to be sure. Quickly, he whipped out his phone and typed out a text.

Lincoln: Can I go into your room, I need to talk to Leni

Within a few seconds, Lori was already typing a reply, no doubt while she was still chasing the twins.

Lori: Sure, but don't touch anything.

Lincoln: Thanks :)

Putting his phone back into his pocket, Lincoln slowly opened the door. Leni was over by her bed, holding two tops, with what appeared to be half her closet haphazardly thrown about her bed. Leni was squinting and looking carefully at both outfits when she suddenly saw her brother, her face shifting into a smile as bright as the sun. "Hey Linky! When did you get here?"

"Uh, just now? Anyway, I picked up this anime at FYA with mom at the mall, and—"

"OMGosh!" squealed Leni as she saw the case, dropping the two tops she was holding as she ran up and grabbed the case. "These outfits are, like, so unique! This one totally rocks that scarf!"

"I… guess?" said Lincoln, not exactly the most knowledgeable when it came to fashion. "Look, I'm getting off track here. I need someone to watch it with me, someone who's at least fourteen."

"Okay! Hope you find someone!" said Leni, Lincoln standing there in stunned silence. He loved all his sisters to death, Leni included, but sometimes she could be a bit… dense.

"I was thinking about you?"

"Ohhhhhh. Sorry, Lincoln, no can do."

"What? Why not?"

"I'm meeting with Jackie and Mandee to hang out at the mall tomorrow, since it's my day off. I need to pick out the perfect outfit!"

"Can't you do that tomorrow morning?"

"No way! This is totes important! If the three of us clash or look too similar, we'll look so silly, and have to change! And that'll cut into our shopping time!"

Lincoln sighed. While the sixteen-year-old wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, she was a savant when it came to clothing and took fashion with the utmost seriousness. There was no way to change her mind.

"I'm really sorry, Linky, but I need to look my best, and that needs my total consecration." She then gave back the JoJo case and grabbed two new blouses, sticking out her tongue as she compared them. Lincoln shrugged and wished her luck, leaving her to "consecrate."

"Okay, Leni was a bust too. But there's still Luan and Luna. I'm sure one of them will be free."

As Lincoln approached their room, he tried to open the door, only for it to be locked. On the bright side, it was better than a bucket of water on the head. Gathering courage for what he was about to unleash, Lincoln lifted his right hand, curled it into a fist, and knocked twice on the door.

"Who's there?" came Luan's voice on the other side.

"Lincoln."

"Lincoln who?"

"Ugh," groaned Lincoln. "Let me in, Luan, I need to ask you something!" There was a pause before he heard approaching footsteps, then the sound of the door being unlocked. The door swung open, revealing the Loud's resident comedian.

"Okay, okay, but you need to work on your material!" Lincoln rolled his eyes, although he couldn't help but grin. As he carefully made his way into her room, careful to avoid any booby traps that Luan no doubt planted. Luan's laptop and history notes sat on the bottom bunk. "So what do you need, Linc?"

"Well, mom let me buy the first season of this show, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, but it's rated TV-14, and she said I needed—"

"Let me guess, an AGEnt? Hahahaha, get it?" joked Luan, pointing a finger gun at her little brother.

"...a chaperone," finished Lincoln, not even dignifying that pun. "Lori and Leni can't do it, so it's just you and Luna. Think you can help me out?"

"Well, I'd love to, but if I don't finish this paper on the Great Depression for Mr. Marshall's class, then I'm HISTORY! Hahahahahahaha!" The fourteen-year-old held her stomach and wiped a tear from her eye as she laughed at her own joke, but instantly stopped and put on an apologetic face. "But seriously, I really need to work on this. Maybe tomorrow?"

"I guess, but I REALLY wanted to watch this as soon as possible," said Lincoln as he slouched over in disappointment, before he perked back up. "There's still Luna. Where is she, anyway?"

"She wanted to have a jam session but didn't want to distract me, so she's setting up in the garage. Kinda wish she stayed here, this thing is giving me DEPRESSION!" As Luan cackled at yet another pun, Lincoln made his way out of the room.

"Thanks, Luan! Good luck on your paper!"

"I'll need it!" shouted Luan as Lincoln shut the door. As Lincoln took a pit stop at his room to grab his spare key to the house, he made his way downstairs, sliding down the railing to save time (something he had quite a bit of experience in). After making it out of the house, he saw the garage door was open with Luna setting up her amplifier inside.

"Okay, last chance! Let's make it count!" he said to himself. "Hey Luna!"

"Oh, s'up bro!" said Luna with a wave, having finally managed to get her amp to the proper settings. "Come to hear some sweet tunes?"

"Actually, I was hoping that you could watch this show with me," said Lincoln as he held out the case. "Mom said I have to watch it with someone who's old enough and, well, you're the only one left."

"JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, huh? Sounds… good?"

"If the synopsis is enough to go by, it really is! So what do you say?"

"Mm, I'm gonna have to pass! I wanna rock, after all!"

'No way,' thought Lincoln, annoyed frown on his face as Luna plugged in her guitar. 'Like I said, this is my last chance, and I AM gonna make it count. Time for the Master of Convincing to work his magic.'

"And a one, and a two, and a one, two, three—"

"LUNA!"

"What now, bro?" sighed Luna, unfazed by Lincoln's volume. She played higher decibels on the daily, after all.

"*sigh* Look, Luna, everyone else who I asked had excuses, all being things that they HAD to do today. You can play your music any day of the week!"

"So? Nothin' wrong with that. Besides, can't you just watch that tomorrow?"

"I could, but let me break it down this way. Let's say you get a new piece of equipment, or a new CD. You'd want to try it out or listen to it the first chance you'd get, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, I guess so," said Luna, letting her ax hang by its strap as she crossed her arms and looked off to the side. He had some valid points, and she was seriously torn between her desire to rock out and her duty as a good sister. She then made the mistake of looking her only brother right in the eyes, as he had resorted to the ultimate tool in his arsenal, the puppy-dog eyes.

"Please, Luna?"

"Okay, okay, just help me get my stuff back into my room and I'll watch it with ya," relented Luna as she ruffled his snow-white hair. As Luna bent over to open up her guitar case, she could have sworn she heard a tea kettle when…

"Yeah, yeah, yeah!" cheered Lincoln, jumping in triumph and excitement. Luna just shook her head and smiled.

"What a dork. Never change, dude."

~LBR~

After the two of them successfully got the amplifier and guitar back into Luna and Luan's room, the two of them walked into the family room towards the couch, which had an odd lump under one of the cushions. Neither of them noticed this, however, as Lincoln went to put the first disk into his game console. Suddenly, the ominous sound of roller skates began approaching.

"Loud is making her way across the rink! She can't be stopped! She rears back for the shot and… "

A hockey puck came flying by, both Lincoln and Luna ducking out of the way. The puck bounced off the fireplace cover and ricocheted around the family room before landing on the couch. It was at this moment that Lynn came skidding to a stop.

"GOOOOOAL!" she cheered, hockey stick in the air as she started shaking her rump in the air, her signature victory dance. "Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh!"

"Geez, give a girl a warning next time!" snapped Luna as Lynn noticed the two of them on the floor, hands on their heads.

"Oh, hey Lunes, Linc. What're you doing on the floor?"

"Trying not to get beaned by a runaway hockey puck," said Lincoln as he got to his feet, brushing himself off.

"My bad, bro," said Lynn as she grabbed her puck and sat on the couch, taking off her roller blades and putting on her usual sneakers. "I was in the zone. What're you two doing here anyway?"

"We were about to watch this show that Lincoln bought," said the fifteen-year-old as she clambered to her feet.

"What, so it's some nerd thing?" chuckled Lynn as she looked at the case in Lincoln's hand, only for her eyes to widen as she snatched the case out of his hand ("Hey!"). "Whoa, these guys are seriously buff! What workout do they do?"

"How should I know?" asked Lincoln as Lynn checked out the back of the box, her curiosity piqued.

"Seems like an action-heavy show, eh? Sounds right up my alley!"

"Huh, didn't know you liked anime," said Lincoln, pleasantly surprised.

"Eh, not always. But my buddy Dexter showed Margo and I a couple I liked, especially this one called Kuroko's Basketball. Hey, mind if I join you guys?"

"You want to watch this with us?" asked Lincoln before narrowing his eyes. "This isn't a trick, is it?"

"No trick, it seems cool. Besides, I gotta know their secret!"

"Eh, the more the merrier," said Luna as she went to sit on the couch, only for the cushion she put her hand on to start moving. Suddenly turning around, Luna slowly grabbed the cushion and lifted it, revealing Lana hiding underneath it, curled into a ball. "Lana?"

"Hi Luna. Nice day, huh?"

"Lana? What're you doing inside the couch?" asked Lynn. "Looking for loose change?"

"Don't tell me you're looking for ABC gum," said Lincoln, cringing at the thought.

"Nah, already swept up both yesterday," said Lana as she hopped out from her hiding spot. "After Lori chewed me out for racing in the halls and moved on to Lola, I took the chance to hide in case Her Majesty came back for revenge."

"What did you even do, anyway?" asked Lincoln, causing Lana to tap her fingers together and look to the side..

"I may or may not have used her tiara to pick my teeth… and not let her know until after she put it on." All three of the others were disgusted by this, with only Lynn having the courage to speak.

"Wha… why… you know where the floss is, you're in the bathroom more than any of us! Except maybe Lisa, or Lori."

"Hey, it's not my fault I'm too short to reach the mirror cabinet! I couldn't find a stool!"

Lincoln opened his mouth to comment, but he decided that kind of humor was beneath him.

"So, that show has a lot of action? I guess while I'm down here, I could check it out."

"I dunno, it's rated TV-14," said Lincoln as he scratched the back of his head. "Mom said I needed a chaperone to watch it, and I'm five years older than you."

"Weak," said Lynn.

"Guess Luna can be my chaperone too," said Lana with a smile as she hopped onto the far right of the couch. "Come on, let's do this!"

"I guess that's fair. Let's finally start it up!" said Lincoln. He quickly turned on the TV and game system and set it to the right input while Luna and Lynn got onto the couch. He grabbed a controller while he ejected the game inside before putting in the first of four discs. Lincoln then hopped onto the couch, controller in his hands. From left to right facing the couch from the TV, Luna was on the far left, followed by Lynn, Lincoln, and finally Lana. As the disc loaded, Lana looked at the back of the box.

"Huh, says here that this is split into two parts. The first one is called 'Phantom Blood.'"

"Phantom Blood? Pfft, sounds like one of the lame romance novels Lucy would read," chuckled Lynn. "What's the second half called?"

"Uh… 'Battle Tendency.'"

"Oh, that sounds so much cooler! Can we just skip to that part?"

"No way, Lynn, we'll miss part of the story!" argued Lincoln as the main menu showed up. Before starting, however, he went to the language and subtitle menu.

"This says it's in either Japanese or English," he said. "Which are we gonna watch?"

"Why would we watch it in a language we don't know?" asked Luna, elbow on the couch arm.

"Well, if we did Japanese, we would watch it with English subtitles," explained Lincoln.

"I vote English," said Lynn. "I don't wanna read while watching."

"Guess that makes it easier. I vote English too," said Lana, briefly getting up to put the case on the TV stand.

"Make that three," added Luna as Lincoln set up the language as English with no subtitles before heading back to the main menu. He then moved the toggle up to the "play" option.

"Okay, everyone ready?" asked Lincoln, before receiving various forms of confirmation. "Sweet! Starting in three, two, one!" And with that, he pressed Play, and the show, along with their journey, began.


And so it begins! Real quick, a couple more notes now that the prologue is finished.

One, I'm not abandoning Koihime Duel. Like I said, this is a bit of practice, as well as a fun concept I wanted to try out. If I'm getting writer's block for my main story, I'll work on this one to get those creative juices flowing through my veins.

Two, the characters. These will be the "main" reactors, for the most part I'll go more into that in a future AN. The reason why I chose Luna, Lynn, and Lana of all people to join Lincoln? I just thought that out of all ten of his sisters, those three would be the most likely to join him.

And that's all from me for now! I've already uploaded the second chapter, so you won't have to wait for the meat of the story! Starpion out!