A/N: Hello all! Sorry about the delay in chapters. Life has been getting chaotic, as it tends to happen. I know many of you have been eager to find out what is next on the agenda for Amelia. I have gotten all of your reviews and I adore them so. I love hearing from all of you.
For those who demand updates anonymously, I cannot reply back to you informing you about what the status is without you being signed in. On that note, just to remind you all that my tumblr, which is linked in my profile, generally gives updates about the status of this story. Thank you all so much for the follows, favourites and reviews. I'm so glad you all like it so much! Also a huge thank you to Sarah for beta reading this and giving tons of encouragement. Without further ado, enjoy the chapter!
Chapter Eighteen
I found Vera easily. She was in one of the laboratories, hunched over papers on a desk with her blond hair tied back.
"Working hard?" I ask as I step closer. I watch as she jumps, having been too lost in her work to focus on her surroundings.
"Miss. Elswood! Hello!" She turns to me with a smile.
I force myself to smile back, ignoring the sinking feeling in my chest that reminds me she has no idea of my true purpose. "What are you working on?" I ask.
"The effects that serums have on the brains over a period of time. It's a lot of work with the sociologists, but it's interesting."
"Oh? What made you focus on it?"
"Well," Vera bites her lip and looks to the side before answering. It shows her nervousness. "When I got to Erudite and started studying the serums themselves, I discovered that all of Amity is fed a peacefulness serum through their food. Now, while I can...understand, I guess, the reasoning for it, it made me wonder about what the long term effects of the drug was and how it effected those in Amity."
Her words make me freeze. I know that Amity is drugged, I had organized the shipments for it when I first started working for Jeanine, but the idea of there being long term effects had never crossed my mind. Suddenly, I feel sorry for Vera. She is too concerned about others and her concern is likely to get her killed.
"Interesting," I say. "Have you found any evidence of it yet?"
"Nothing concrete. I'm working with the sociologists at the moment to study the behaviours of those in Amity over time and in different ages, but I need to gain access to the medical history."
I open my tablet. "Have you spoken to Gregory? He's one of the lead scientists."
"Yes," she said slowly, as if confused by my question. "He said there was no need at this time. That I should gather more data from the sociologists and form my hypothesis based on the knowledge I can gain here first."
I pause. He is stalling her, waiting for a reaction that he can bring to Jeanine. This way he will get what he wants without wasting resources on a test subject. I feel sick. "I will get the medical records sent to you," I say, quickly typing out an email. I am here to sentence her to death. The least I can do is sate her curiosity first.
"You can do that?" she asks in wonder. Her eyes are wide when I look up at her.
I give a short nod. "I can. You'll have your information by the end of the day."
"Thank you!" she grins widely and her arms go wide and she steps towards me as if to wrap them around me.
I step back quickly.
"Oh! Sorry," she gives me another smile. "I'm still getting used to the lack of physical contact here."
My chest tightens. Most Erudites only use physical contact to achieve a reaction from the other person. It has little to do with an expression of joy unless it is to parent and child, and occasionally married couples. Even then, there is always a search for the right reaction. Enough time has passed that the transfers have adapted and conformed to the ideals of Erudite, as is necessary, but not Vera. She is still too Amity.
Her voice pulls me from my thoughts. "Do you...do you mind if I ask you something?"
"If you don't ask, you'll never find an answer," I say lightly. It is something my father used to tell me.
"It's just...I've heard rumours," she said quickly. "About you and a...Dauntless."
I sigh. "What have you heard?" The best way of combatting the truth is hearing the version people have presented first.
"That you and one of the Dauntless were seen together, practically having..." she pauses for a second before adjusting her statement. "You were seen to be very close with one of the Dauntless, more than what is considered proper. People are saying that you and him were, well, you know..." she doesn't elaborate.
The rumours have gotten further from the truth and yet not far enough. I take a deep breath before giving her a small smile. "I'm afraid that is false. Yes, I was at the Dauntless compound as we are working with them to improve their systems. The event that occurred to prompt these rumours were just that of a Dauntless trying to provoke a reaction." I look at her closely. "The Dauntless do what they do just for a reaction, for their own enjoyment. He was attempting to push boundaries out of amusement and it was taken out of hand by those who witnessed it. Nothing more."
She nods before giving me a grin. "I knew it wasn't true." I wish she was right. That it was all just a rumour, but Eric's attentions were more than just a one time grab for attention. Her attention remains on me instead of turning back to her work. She is friendly and patient, even when it comes to those who interrupt her.
She looked pensive for a moment and fidgets slightly, glancing away before she finally speaks.
"Can I ask you something else?" she asks. I nod in response. She looks afraid but stubborn. "I also hear rumours...about Divergents." She looks up at me, curiosity and fear in her eyes. I don't think she's aware of what she's projecting to me. "People have been saying that they're dangerous."
It feels like there is something stuck in my throat before I force myself to answer.
"Yes," I say. "There has been talk about Divergents, but only in terms of the possibility, at the moment. There is still not much known, but research is being done to ensure that our safety is guaranteed. I wouldn't worry," I smile. "If there is any danger, we would know. We are Erudite after all."
There is a lull in the conversation. I hope that my words have given her cause to think, and perhaps will encourage her to hide herself better. If she is smart, she'll run.
Finally, I break the silence. "Are you enjoying Erudite?" I ask, masking my question in politeness.
"I think so," she admits, looking relieved at the topic change. "It's a little intimidating, but I am learning so much," she says with a grin. "I just hope that I can discover something new, something that will help people."
"I'm sure you will." I force a smile to my face, ignoring the guilt that is creeping up my spine. "If you'll excuse me," I say, "I need to return. Inform me if you don't receive the records by tonight."
"I will! And thank you so much Miss. Elswood!" She's grinning at me gratefully and I turn and leave without another word. This isn't like the Dauntless boy. I've gotten to know Vera, even slightly. I feel as if I'm fleeing for my own safety. I won't regret it. I can't.
There are messages waiting for me when I return to my desk. The first is Riley, asking to meet again. He suggests dinner, this time at my apartment. I ignore it. I cannot deal with Riley, not now. The second message is from Jeanine. She demands my presence in her office as soon as I return.
I knock lightly on her door, waiting for her voice signalling me to enter.
She looks up as I open the door. She's an intimidating figure behind her large metal desk and I steel myself inwardly against what she may demand from me next. She motions for me to close the door and take the open seat across from her.
I do so.
"Report."
I take a deep breath, trying to settle my nerves before speaking. "I spoke with Vera in the last hour. While she seems focused on her goals of understanding the long-term effects that serums have on people, she still remains affectionate towards others. She is easily distracted from her work. While she does seem eager to assist people and find the answers she is looking for, she also showcases empathy towards others, not just in regards to her work but in her general being. She also asked about the rumours of Divergents."
Jeanine's eyes are cold as she watches me. "And?"
"I informed her that we were still in the processes of research and that as Erudites we would know if there was a danger. She looked..." I pause, knowing that my next words could seal her fate. "Afraid," I say, "when she asked. She was also relieved when the topic changed."
Jeanine's hands clasp together as she leans forward. "What do you suggest we do?"
Like everything with Jeanine, this was a test.
"While she does show traits that are not entirely Erudite, we cannot be certain of her Divergence as of yet. We do not get many Amity transfers and it is possible that it is a lingering effect from the serums that will fade with more time. I would suggest that the girl is given more time and tested through other ways." I don't break eye contact with Jeanine until she nods. The relief that flows through me should make me feel better, but it doesn't. I may have bought Vera more time, but Jeanine's trust in me only signifies that she is likely to give me more to do with the condemnation of suspected Divergents.
"Good. Notify Communications that I want to hold an assembly for all of Erudite. We are going to start informing our people about the dangers they face. They need to be informed. I want you, Amelia, to watch the crowd as I speak. Look especially for those with negative reactions, understood?"
"Yes, ma'am," I nod. She is going to use me like radar. To find those who are unable to hide their reactions.
"You are also to go back to Dauntless," she says and it feels like my heart stops. She doesn't seem to notice. "I want an update on our systems there, as well as a list of volunteers that will be brought for testing. We are going to look at the minds of each faction and discover the exact cause of Divergence. Then we will know how to abolish it. Inform Max and Eric that they are to have a list of potentials ready for when you get there.
"Yes, ma'am." I feel like I can barely breathe. I will have to face Eric again. He will ask about the boy, and...after our last interaction that left me far more vulnerable than I ever wished to be in front of him. I kissed him back.
"That's all."
My mind snaps back to the present at Jeanine's dismissal. I nod and stand, surprising myself with how steady I seem. I walk out quietly, sitting at my desk before turning on my computer to write to the Communications department. I took a deep breath. I had work to do; I couldn't waste my time panicking over the past.
I avoided Riley as well as I could, but there is only so far I can go as Jeanine gives her speech. I keep my eyes on the audience, avoiding how close Riley was standing next to me.
"You've been avoiding me."
I ignore him for a moment as I try to figure out the best way to respond. This is not the time or place for this conversation. "I've been busy," I say softly.
"Too busy to even reply?"
"Yes," my tone brooks no room for argument. "I warned you that my work came first. Now if you will excuse me, I need to pay attention. I will inform you of my next availability for dinner when I know it."
He falls silent and it allows me to watch the audience like I'm supposed to. Most of the audience is captivated by Jeanine. I can see some of them taking notes as she speaks. It takes me a while before I find Vera but she is the only one whose body is tense. I'm too far away but I imagine that there is fear in her eyes. I can see her looking around at the others, as if trying to find someone who is as equally horrified as she is. I take a deep breath and try not to sigh. Vera doesn't have enough control over her physical reactions.
I turn on my tablet and take note of what I'm seeing. My chest constricts as I realize with every letter I am the one that is sentencing her to testing. I try not to clench my jaw and look back up as Jeanine is finishing her speech. I can see some of the crowd murmuring to each other, and there is a small few that look nervous. Automatically, I mentally take note of whose actions are suspicious, memorizing their features if I cannot recall their names. My attention is broken when I catch movement in the crowd and my heart sinks. Vera is leaving before it's over, moving slowly so as not to attract too much attention to herself. She has condemned herself.
[tbc]
