Before the Dawn
CW: Severely ill loved one
My legs shook as I sat with Dad and Aunt Aradne in a waiting room at the largest hospital in Ashalla. I wasn't even doing it on purpose. I just couldn't contain my nerves.
Dad put a hand on my knee. "Hey. It's going to be okay."
I nodded and willed my legs to be still. Instead, I fidgeted with the scars in my hands.
It seemed like an eternity until finally a medical assistant emerged from the double-doors and called, "Eelo."
Almost everyone in the waiting room looked up, eyes widening at the sight of me. They hadn't noticed before, but hearing my name seemed to trigger their recognition. They were all paying attention now.
I fixed my gaze determinedly on the assistant and followed her deeper into the hospital. She took us through winding hallways, past a large nurse's station, and into a well-lit private room where one person sat in a large, elevated biobed.
A lump crawled up my throat, threatening to choke me. "Marnah," I whispered.
Her eyes tracked the sound of my voice, still their beautiful teal color but missing the spark they used to have. She stared at me for a moment, blinked, then looked away.
It was like she didn't even recognize me.
"The doctor will be here to speak with you soon," the assistant said.
Dad nodded. "Thank you."
I followed him to a set of chairs on her right, while Aradne took the chair on her left.
Tentatively, he reached for her hand. "Faye?"
She didn't react. Didn't acknowledge him at all.
He talked to her anyway. Asked her how she was. Told her about the day, about how I had survived the Delta Quadrant, about the homecoming reception in a few days.
About how she'd be so proud of me.
At some point, a Bajoran doctor came by to share updates on Marnah's condition, explain how the doctors were coordinating with the specialists that had treated Marnah on Cardassia Prime, and answer any questions we had. I did my best to pay attention. It was important information, albeit strange to fathom that Cardassians and Bajorans were working together as if they hadn't been bitter enemies just a few years ago.
As if it wasn't the Cardassians who did this to Marnah in the first place.
After the doctor left, I excused myself and backtracked my way through the hospital until I made it outside.
I kept walking.
Then I was running.
I didn't stop.
I had to get away.
Tears streamed down my face. The doctor had tried to be realistically optimistic. She said that it was possible Marnah might someday regain the ability to communicate, that they still didn't know how much she remembered of herself and her life before. Someday, she might recognize us, smile at us, even hold conversations with us.
Or she might be like this for the rest of her life.
Without planning to, I ended up at the transport station. They scanned my badge and beamed me to Deep Space Nine. We'd been staying in guest quarters on the station for the past two weeks, so I knew my way well.
Harry barely had time to stand up before I threw myself into his arms and sobbed.
The homecoming party went off without a hitch. It was massive and beautiful, all formal dress and smiles and pre-scripted interviews with the press. The event wasn't just about us—it was also a chance for Bajor to show off how far it had come since the days of the occupation. The lavish setting was filled with fine art of every kind, which was as much a part of the media reporting as we were.
Voyager and Equinox crews were home, and Bajor was strong and independent and ready for tourists.
Deep down, I wasn't entirely sure how to feel about either of those things. Both crews lost a lot of good people between the Caretaker's array and our miraculous return, so the pomp for us survivors was bittersweet. As for Bajor… well, Ashalla and other major cities had been rebuilt beautifully, but there were still plenty of scars and struggling people in areas that were considered less important to the global economy.
Of course, I showed none of my ambivalence to the press. Starfleet public relations specialists had trained me well.
After the reception, people started planning their trips home—wherever home was for them. Harry and I bid his parents farewell and promised them we'd visit as soon as we returned to Earth. I couldn't convince myself to leave just yet. Not with Marnah still in the hospital and Dad on extended family leave.
Yet with every goodbye to a former crew mate, my pagh tore a little more.
Tuvok returned to Vulcan with his family the morning after our reception, and he immediately began treatment to combat his neurodegenerative condition.
Schmullis was ordered to headquarters for more in-depth study, and he was more than happy to comply.
Starfleet put a lot of pressure on Annika to go to Earth and work with Starfleet Command as a consultant. At first she was hesitant, but her cohort from Unimatrix Zero convinced her it was a good place for her to help coordinate and gather support for finding and rehabilitating the trillions of ex-Borg scattered across the galaxy. Eventually, she relented and moved with Meg to San Francisco.
After his sister went home, Chakotay left with Janeway for Earth. Command wasn't too happy about following through on their promise to embrace former Maquis—especially Chakotay, as his defection and giving away of Starfleet secrets was a betrayal on par with my own—but Captain Janeway pulled every string she had to protect us and make sure we were treated well.
And she had a lot of strings.
The moment Starfleet relented to pressure from the Cardassian government, Iliana returned home to find what was left of her family. Ironically, her father had developed a close relationship with Kira while we were gone, and although she wouldn't admit it, I was convinced that talking to Kira was a healing experience for her.
Sisko retired from Starfleet and went home to Bajor where his wife had built a house they had designed before he joined the Prophets. Together, they began making plans to open a New Orleans Cajun-style restaurant in Ashalla.
Celes and Lyndsay took indefinite leave from Starfleet and moved to Bajor to be near Celes' family.
Kes decided to stay on Deep Space Nine after hitting it off with Dr. Bashir over their shared interest in genetics. She was getting near the end of her life and wanted to make as much of a difference as she could with the time she had left.
Tom and B'Elanna weren't sure where they wanted to settle, but they did want to keep Kes close until B'Elanna gave birth. Kira offered them positions on Deep Space Nine as a transport pilot and engineer respectively, which they eagerly accepted.
A few months later, their baby arrived—a beautiful little girl they named Miral after B'Elanna's mother. It was a much-needed bright spot in a dark and aimless time of my life.
Marnah's condition never improved.
After a month in the hospital without change, she was released to home care with Aunt Aradne. Deb, her partners, and my niece and nephew spent two weeks on Bajor helping with the transition. Dad and I continued to help out after they left, though there wasn't much to do. Aradne settled into a routine and nothing really changed.
Two weeks later, Dad went back to California.
It was five months after our return to the Alpha Quadrant when I finally made up my mind on our next move. Starfleet didn't give any indication that they were going to discharge me, though there were still a lot of unanswered questions. What would they do when I indicated I was ready to return to duty? As I did my own healing work with a therapist on Bajor, I'd been coming back around to my love for counseling. But if Starfleet offered me a command position, would I take it? Would they allow me any authority at all?
And what the hell had happened to Baxial on that fateful day when Voyager was destroyed?
I had a feeling I'd hear from Starfleet Intelligence—or Section 31—eventually. Perhaps the newly-promoted Admiral Janeway would come knocking at my door asking me to pick up her and Tuvok's secret project to take 31 down.
But those were questions for later. For now, I was following my therapist's advice—focus on my recovery and take life one day at a time.
Harry and I were standing on the observation deck, staring down at the beautiful blue planet below. He squeezed my hand.
I squeezed back.
"Let's go to Earth," I said.
"You sure?" He asked. "My parents can always visit us here."
"I'm sure." I turned from the window, tearing my gaze from Marnah's homeworld and setting them on Harry's deep brown eyes instead. "I want to go home."
He pressed a kiss to my forehead. "Okay. Let's go home."
AUTHOR NOTE: It's strange to finally end this series after six years, but I'm glad I finally got to share with you what I've been kicking around in my head all this time. I'm sorry it took so long, but I truly appreciate all of you for reading and especially those who have hung in there for months and years, waiting for me to finish. I didn't expect an OC-lead story would get the attention and appreciation that it has, but I'm so glad it meant as much to you as it did to me. It was a labor of love in honor of the series that, more than any other, influenced me as a child and helped shape me into the person I am today.
Thank you all so much.
