"I spy with my little eyes... something yellow." I began, squinting ahead.
"Is it the sand?" Felandria asked me.
"Correct again!"
Holy shit, the desert is boring. So boring, in fact, that I've resorted to playing "I Spy" like a child.
I also think this heat is getting to me, the sun feels more overbearing than usual today, but maybe that's just me.
I examined my sword. The enchantment clearly gave the sword a new shimmer, but exactly what it does is unknown to me.
As we headed out, I had grabbed it from the smith, who told me it was enchanted with something called "Corpse's Bane." I don't know what that is, but it probably has something to do with Undead. I don't know how it will react to the whole 'Demon Realm Silver' thing, though... That being said, I hope it does a lot more damage now...
It does feel nice to have a standard longsword again. Lugging around that greatsword was exhausting.
"I spy with my little eye," Felandria began, "something... black."
"It's my outfit." Agnes said.
"Yep!" Felandria smiled, "how are you not dying in that?"
"It's a matter of focus and devotion, this outfit is proof of my connection with God." Agnes explained, "this heat is nothing compared to the connection I share with the Lord."
But even the will of God could not keep her from drenching her outfit in sweat.
I'm not in a better scenario, though. I was wearing three layers of clothing, my standard dress, chain, then another layer of clothes. I was baking out in this heat, but if I tore off my armor, I bet Felandria'd be all over me...
That bath felt like it went to waste, cause I'm once again sweaty and disgusting... I miss Air Conditioning, one of mankind's greatest inventions.
Create Water helped cool us down when it got too miserable, but then it'd heat up again, and it'd get stickier, so we used it sparingly.
Akil was mostly unfazed by the heat, probably because he wasn't wearing any kind of armor or heavy dress. I also imagine spending his entire life here wouldn't hurt either...
Felandria was basically only wearing a bra and a loincloth, despite what her illusory appearance may look like at times, plus she's flying around us, so she probably has the wind in her face. I envy her...
That being said...
Why am I carrying her junk?
She ordered a ton of stuff when we went shopping, and I'm supposed to carry all of it?
To top it off, she even told me I couldn't look at it.
That only makes me want to look at it more!
I hope these ruins show up soon, because I'm not gonna function if there's a whole week's worth of travel still in this.
"Hey guys!" Felandria landed beside us, "there's a cave up ahead!"
Everyone practically sighed with relief. Finally, a break from the sun!
And, knowing most fantasy adventure stuff, there may be something interesting in there. I don't really care if there's a Dragon guarding that cave, at least it's something other than sand!
The cave came within our line of sight around ten minutes later, and we made it there in about twenty.
"So... shall we go explore?" I asked, barely keeping my excitement level.
Felandria smiled, "yes! Let's get out of this heat for once!"
Agnes nodded, clearly relieved that we were moving out of the sun for a bit.
"I suppose a little exploring wouldn't hurt." Akil grinned, lighting a torch.
We entered the cave, the shade welcoming us inside. I sighed with relief, and took a swig from my waterskin.
The cave tunneled downwards, descending into darkness. I'll be honest, though. Anything sounds better than being out in that sun.
As we trekked downwards, all collectively enjoying the cool temperatures, we noticed the cave branch off into various different directions.
"So, do we want to go Left, Right, Left-Right, Right-Left, Left-Left-Right, or-" Akil began.
"Just use numbers!" Agnes said.
"Fine. Which path should we go down?"
There were six paths in front of us. As the leader of the bunch, I decided it would be up to me to choose.
"Let's go down... path number three." I said.
Everyone seemed okay with that, and we walked down the third path.
The third path led us to another chamber, where there were five other entrances next to us, as well as a single path forward. The illusion of choice...
Torches lined the sides of the path, which made me think this cave might not be uninhabited. Which makes me even more excited. My first actual dungeon! I wonder what awaits inside...
"Well, I guess maybe taking a peek wouldn't hurt..." Agnes said, noticing my expression.
We walked through the doorway, noticing almost immediately a change in the overall environment. What was once a dry, dusty cave, was now slightly damp, with water dripping down from the ceiling.
Water...
It's been so long since I've seen naturally occurring water. Tears welled up in my eyes.
"Are you alright, hubby?" Felandria asked.
"Stop calling him that." Agnes told her.
A droplet of water fell on my shoulder.
Sizzle...
Was someone frying bacon up ahead?
No...
My armor's melting off!
I looked at the droplet of 'water.' That color... it's way too blue. Shit.
More droplets began raining from the ceiling, targeting not just me, but Akil as well.
"What the-" Akil jumped backwards, and the droplets hit the ground.
As more and more drops of this ooze impacted the floor, they began to congeal together into a larger form, slowly taking on a humanoid shape.
For me, however, my body was slowly getting covered in it.
God damn it... it's actually... a little heavy... my movements are getting sluggish... this is not good...
I raised my shield to try and block it, but the goo ate through the metal. IT ATE THROUGH SOLID METAL. This is absolutely NOT what I had in mind when I said I wanted to go dungeon-crawling.
More drops landed onto me as Agnes let out a scream. I looked over at her, and some drops of goop had landed on her dress and was now eating away at her clothing.
"Get it off of me!" She frantically wiped it off of her, sending it flying into the walls of the tunnel. From there, the seemingly sentient goo practically leapt towards me, merging with the ooze encasing me.
"Hubby!" Felandria leapt forward, slamming into me. The ooze seemed to actively repel her, pushing her away despite her frantic struggling.
I clutched my holy symbol as blue slowly overtook my vision. It began glowing a dark blue, and my sword was encased in a similar light.
I held the sword aloft, and it made a thunderous shockwave, sending the ooze flying off of me and into the walls, buying me some time.
Akil nimbly dodged through the blue splatter and grabbed me and Agnes.
The ooze, now behind us, was merging into two large blobs, which were slowing growing bigger as they grew arms, a head, and a pair of... a pair of tits?
"Slimes..." Akil groaned.
"Ugh..." Agnes shuddered.
I clutched my sword. "What's wrong guys? They're just Slimes." This is the type of trash mob that gets killed by one hit. Easy peasy.
"You... don't know how Slimes work, do you?" Akil asked.
"Huh?"
"For one, they're immune to all forms of non-magical attacks." Akil began counting on his fingers, "they can eat away metal in an instant, so good luck hiding behind your equipment, and even if you have tight-fitting plate armor, they can fit anywhere, so running away in spaces like this or using ridiculously heavy armor doesn't help, they're sticky, and their stubborn. If your seriously considering fighting this, I hope that sword of yours got a buff recently, cause anything non-enchanted will do absolutely nothing to a Slime."
Wow, I'm kinda lucky.
"My sword's enchanted." I said simply.
Akil blinked. "Why am I not surprised?"
We turned back to the Slimes, who idly shifted their gelatinous hips side to side, looking a little hurt that we had been ignoring them for a little bit.
Agnes held up her holy symbol, and it flickered white for a second, before glowing a dark blue color... hm. Anyway, a bolt of blue energy streaked through the air, striking one of the Slimes, blasting a hole through their stomach. Their body wobbled and wiggled from the impact, and the Slime collapsed to the ground, forming a large puddle that was slowly pulling itself back together.
"Most of my daggers don't have an enchantment..." Akil muttered, bringing out a golden sheath, "so I guess this one'll have to do."
"Where have you been hiding that?" Agnes, Felandria, and I asked him.
"A good Rogue never reveals all his tricks at once." Akil winked at us.
We stared at him for a second.
"Cmon, you can't expect me to tell EVERYTHING about myself, huh? A man's gotta have some secrets-"
A tendril of blue ooze lashed out at us, and we all jumped backwards.
The Slime had finished reforming, and the two were beginning to look a little annoyed at our apparent lack of interest.
Akil threw the dagger, and red flame engulfed the blade, sinking into the Slime's body. The Slime let out a warbling cry of pain, it sounded like someone trying to scream underwater.
The dagger vanished in a flash of light and reappeared in Akil's hand.
"Neat huh? It's got Flame-Tongue and Returning." He winked at me.
Not that this was a contest of coolest weapon or anything, but I think Corpse's Bane sounds way better than that.
I leapt towards one of the Slimes. Their gelatinous face stretched into a grin as I got closer, and I slashed at their body with my sword.
As my sword made contact with her body, a familiar feeling washed over me, a pulsing of divine power, and I embraced it, pushing it into my sword as it lit up in a dark blue light.
The Slime wailed as it cleaved into it, cutting through its body like butter.
There wasn't any splash of mana from this wound, but the slime splattered all over the wall, and didn't reform.
Trash mobs, just like I thought. Well, trash mobs with some dangerous immunities I guess.
Agnes and Akil attacked the second one, Akil slicing through it like Jello, and Agnes firing off blasts of divine energy.
This Slime, once defeated, evaporated into the air.
"Woah."
"Slimes evaporate once killed." Akil explained.
"You killed her?"
"Look, I know you're on a pacifist craze here, but I can't neutralize a hostile monster without killing them." Akil brandished his daggers. "These weapons aren't for knocking things out, like yours, you know. I didn't see you raise any complaint against those Gnolls we fought earlier. Did you think the ones I took out then were still alive?"
He's got a point...
"But can we please limit the killing as much as possible?" I asked.
"No promises." Akil replied, "but... I'll try."
Agnes and Felandria looked at the two of us.
I examined my equipment. Well, the shield's got a few holes in it, and my armor's gonna need some work, but nothing else was damaged much, thank goodness.
We trekked further down the tunnel, exploring every nook and cranny.
There were several rooms filled with what seemed to be dried food and basic supplies, but there was little to no sign of life... anywhere. This place doesn't look like it's been lived in recently...
Well, I thought that at first, but as we went deeper, there were deep claw marks in the tunnel walls, food was scattered everywhere. There was even the remains of a camel lying in the corner, chunks torn out of its body. Judging by the state of decomposition... it couldn't have been killed more than a few days ago...
We all shared a glance, and put our hands on our weapons.
As we passed deeper into the cave, we noticed a lump of... something, in the recesses of one of the rooms. The shape was... humanoid, but there was no breathing, or any sign of life.
We approached it, and as we got closer, I poked at the thing.
It collapsed under the pressure, revealing skeletal remains wearing leather armor. Large, quill-like spines protruded from its body.
Felandria let out a cry of surprise, and hid behind me.
"Whoever did this could still be around..." Akil warned us. We nodded. Keep vigilant.
We -now much more stealthily- walked deeper down the tunnel.
The claw marks were more and more frequent, and entrails of various wild beasts were strewn about, making Agnes gag.
"What would do such a thing?" Agnes whispered under her breath.
I put my hand on her shoulder, and she looked up at me.
"We'll be fine. I'll protect you." I smiled.
Her face turned a little red, and she looked away, her symbol beginning to slightly glow again.
"What about me, hubby?" Felandria asked.
"You too." I replied, "and please stop calling me that."
This tunnel kept going down, and the deeper it went, the more eerie it became. It felt like walking down a haunted house, everything here almost seemed intentional, as if to scare the living daylights out of anyone who walked through. But this wasn't any haunted house, this was real.
As we walked down the hallway, I noticed a large tunnel going upwards.
"Well, that's not ominous at all..." Akil muttered under his breath.
As we went further down, we found more lumps of bones, each embedded with quills. At this point Akil stopped and examined one.
"Uh, should you be touching that?" I asked as he plucked on from the corpse.
"Hm..." he looked it over. "I imagine it'll be fine. Look, the venom dried out a long time ago." He pointed at the quill. It was a bright pink color, with a purple-stained point at the end.
"Venom?"
"Yep." He tossed the quill to the ground. "This is probably the work of some type of monster. The quills are natural weapons, so they aren't poison needles. That being said, a monster with a venom-based attack doesn't particularly narrow much down. But it isn't a Girtablilu..." seeing my confused expression, he elaborated, "scorpion-men."
He continued, "also, aside from the Slimes in the front, this monster seems intent on keeping others away... we haven't seen any other monster living here since the entrance..." he thought for a moment. "We could be dealing with something dangerous here. Loner monsters are usually incredibly powerful."
Okay. That's not reassuring. But still, there's one monster, and four of us. We could probably beat it easily if we worked together.
Maybe I could sense if it's still here? I focused my mind. Sure enough... I felt a presence further down. It was a dark feeling, similar to the one I felt outside the village. Not Undead... something else.
"Guys... whatever's down there... it's giving me the same feeling as that tailed Gnoll."
Everyone went silent.
"Well, we'll just have to beat it then." Akil said, smirking.
We continued onwards. Felandria was trembling behind me, clutching my side.
"We can take it..." I said, giving her a reassuring smile.
The tunnel finally opened up, revealing a large circular chamber with a few treasure chests at the back, sitting on top a small pile of gold. I smiled, treasure.
Something whizzed past my head, and I raised my shield just in time for seven or so needles to embed themselves into whatever remained of my shield. Honestly I was lucky it didn't hit any of those holes the Slimes created... I suppose I'd better start thanking God, since she's clearly looking out for me...
"You're faster than I thought you'd be..." a voice purred.
We looked up at the ceiling, and hovering a dozen feet over the treasure pile was a large monster. Two large wings unfurled around her, keeping her aloft as a large tail curled menacingly towards us. Large, familiar-looking spikes stuck out from a large bulb at the end of it. What is it with monsters and venomous tails?
Two fuzzy triangular ears sprouted from the top of her head, and her spiky pink hair was done up in a makeshift ponytail. Similarly to the Gnolls, the lower halves of her arms and legs were covered in fur, however this time the fur was a dark purple, almost black.
She wore something that could barely be called clothing. Even the Gnolls had more class than this, and they were wearing rags! Her bra just barely covered her nipples, not doing much to keep her bust at bay, and she was wearing what I could only call a thong that didn't leave much to the imagination. On the side of her upper thigh, there was a heart-shaped tattoo just under her bountiful rear.
The monster gave us a wild grin, sharp teeth glinting in the darkness. Her tail slowly moved forward, and I noticed it... open up? At the end of the tail was a large hole that convulsed rapidly as she looked over us, dripping with... actually, it's best to leave it up to the imagination.
"Fufufu, it seems some cute little morsels have found their way into my lair... I presume you all enjoyed the walk down? Do you know how much effort all of that took?"
We stared at her for a second.
"Never mind. Do you know exactly where you are, my tasty-looking morsels?" She licked her lips, and I felt visibly uncomfortable.
Felandria hid behind my back.
"Oh don't you worry, little one, I'll eat you too..." the monster purred, her tail convulsing once again, "but first, I'd love to get to know my prey a little better... what is your name?" She looked directly at me.
Why am I the only one who gets targeted here? "That's none of your business." I said, taking off my pack and getting into a defensive stance.
"No fun, no fun at all..." the monster's smile grew, "but you know what they say, the more bitter you are on the outside, the sweeter you'll taste on the inside, hm?"
I don't think anyone has ever said that ever.
That being said, this monster is... something else. I wonder if what Felandria said is true. I trust her, but the idea that monsters aren't capable of hurting humans is pretty far-fetched, and if that was the case, why was this monster gloating about how she'll eat us and all?
"So... my little snacks... I just want to know... do you want to do this the easy way, or do you want to do it the hard way?" The monster tilted her head, her tail-hole dripping with what could be saliva at best, at worst... I don't want to think about it.
I readied my sword, Akil clutched his daggers, and Agnes began muttering an incantation. Felandria huddled behind me, but she gave me a determined glance.
"Good. I love it when my prey fights back. I hope you do so all the way~ it's much more fun for me, you know." The monster smiled.
Her tail coiled up in the air, and let loose more quills, firing them down at us like a Gatling gun.
"Shit, run!" I yelled, and we all scattered, the quills hitting the ground where we stood.
The fire was focused on me, I noticed. She must've looked at the armored Paladin and determined that I was the biggest threat. Perhaps that could be her undoing. I could hear the quills hitting the ground behind me as I booked it, my heart racing in my chest.
"Don't think I see you trying to get closer to me." She said, and I skidded to a halt just as three dozen quills slammed to the ground in front of me. "If you want to get closer to me that badly, I'll gladly gobble you up..."
I darted to the side, only for more quills to hit the ground in front of me, one narrowly missing my nose. Soon I was boxed in by quills. She flew closer to me, giving me that same smug, self-satisfying smirk I've seen constantly from a certain Rogue whenever he's amused at something.
"My my," she chortled, "I'm glad your getting yourself all worked up for me. Sweat makes a perfect seasoning, you know?"
Again, I doubt anyone ever has ever thought this way.
Her tail was pulsing excitedly, liquid dripping from the orifice.
"Now... how about we make a deal, hm?" She purred, her predatory yet somewhat sultry eyes looking me over.
I noticed in the corners of my eyes Akil and Agnes readying ranged attacks. They both nodded at me, telling me to play along. If I can keep her still for a moment, they could hit her with everything they've got-
"Get away from my hubby!" Felandria charged at her.
The monster flicked her tail, and several quills shot out, embedding themselves into Felandria. She weakly flapped her wings for a moment, and then fell to the ground, and several more quills slammed into her, keeping her pinned. Felandria's face grew red, and she began panting somewhat as she started struggling.
"That's adorable." The monster cooed, "but this one still has the scent of a virgin, you know. I don't think you've claimed anyone as your hubby, and now, you probably never will~" she turned back to me, "so about that deal..."
"What is it?" I glared at her.
"I just love that expression you're giving me!" The monster's eyes lit up with joy, "I can't want to toy with you, before devouring everything you are..." she flew just a little bit closer. "Here's the deal. You drop your weapons and submit to me... and I'll let your friends go, hm? They don't have the same smell that you do, they aren't nearly as appetizing." Her tail-hole pulsed ominously as more liquid hit the ground with a wet squelch. "So, how about it?"
Just a little closer. My hands tightened around my sword.
Her tail/mouth-looking thing opened wider, allowing me a glimpse inside. Pink flesh pulsed inside of it, dripping with that viscous liquid as it slowly hovered over my head.
"Isn't it lovely?" The monster grabbed her tail and held it, stroking it gently like a cat, "my tail will consume it all... don't you want to be inside it? Doesn't it look inviting?"
Akil gave me a thumbs up, Agnes nodded, and the two of them prepared to attack.
"Not especially..." I grimaced as she floated closer, just out of reach of my sword.
"That's pretty rude, I think it just wants to get to know you, isn't that right~" the head of her tail slowly turned to face me, and it opened wide. At this point it was hovering almost directly over me, and I watched as the fluid started to slowly form a droplet over my head, threatening to fall down on my head. "It's just so hungry, you know~ it needs something nice and meaty inside it, you know?"
If she is indeed planning on eating me, I'd prefer it sound WAY less sexually-charged than this.
"So... again I ask, what's your answer, my morsel?"
Akil threw his dagger, and Agnes fired her spell.
I gripped my sword and leapt up in the air, slashing at her.
"A definite no." I said, swinging my sword.
"Hm. That's a-" the monster began, before getting blasted with holy energy. "Ow! What the-" her voice was cut off as she let out a howl of pain as Akil's dagger sunk into her shoulder blades, hitting a vital spot.
My sword slashed across her chest, dark purple mana gushing from the wound.
"Looks like you all have more fight that I thought..." the monster murmured, grinning at me. "But I was perfectly honest when I said just you would do, you know. It's a shame you decided for it to go this way." She flicked her tail, and several needles went flying towards Agnes and Akil.
Akil nimbly dodged out of the way, but Agnes wasn't so lucky. The quills stuck to her, and I saw her face began to grow red, and she began panting, her knees shaking a bit.
Oh no, another aphrodisiac venom? Are you kidding me?
The monster leered at me, licking her lips. "Now it's your turn..."
