Ginyu
Chapter 63: What We Make
A cold, frigid wind rolled across the ground, throwing biting snow into Launch's face. Her shoulder-length hair, intermixing strands of blue and yellow color, thrashed behind her. Undeterred, she flared her ki, melting the ice forming the front of her body, and swung her head around to yell. 'JUST A LITTLE FARTHER!' she crooned through the storm. 'I SEE A CAVE!'
Behind her and several strides back, Suno and Chiaotzu struggled to follow in her footsteps. The snow cover this high up on the mountain was taller than Chiaotzu and went up to Suno's chest- they had no idea how Launch was traipsing forward at the speed that she was. They also didn't understand how, whereas they were fully padded and clothed for cold weather, Launch had nothing on except for a jacket and another pair of pants over her usual combat gi.
'I DON'T SEE ANYTHING!' Suno screamed back, feeling justifiably angry. No sane person, who was dragging themself through a snowstorm on a hunch, would force their friends to come along. Though, maybe Suno got it backward. Was she sane if she agreed to go with Launch in the first place?
A presence at Suno's side snapped her out of her thoughts. Warmth touched the right side of her body.
'IF SHE SEES A CAVE, I'M GOING INTO IT!' Chiaotzu said loudly as he passed her, looking much whiter than usual. His tunnel through the snow, which he dug by heating the area in front of him with his ki, suddenly lurched forward in length. He started running.
Suno looked ahead- Launch's image was becoming more and more blurry as the length of the storm between them grew. Cursing under her breath, she used her ki in a similar way that Chiaotzu was doing and plowed forward.
A few minutes later, Launch, followed quickly by Suno and Chiaotzu, tumbled into a cave. It was sloped and ran up into the mountain, shielding its interior from the snow and wind outside.
While her companions rubbed their hands together, Launch moved deeper into the cave, hiking up a small incline. Farther inside, there was little to no light, and Launch stopped at the precipice of total darkness. She looked into the darkness, noticed a glint, and reached in.
'Launch?' Chiaotzu asked, peering up at Launch's dim outline against the featureless black of the cave's interior. 'What are you doing up there?'
Launch rose, hesitated, and turned around. Glistening in her right hand was the six-star dragonball.
Chiaotzu's expression dropped. 'What?!'
'You absolute maniac,' Suno said, her outwardly angry face betraying how impressed she was at Launch. 'Made us walk up a mountain through a blizzard on a hunch… and you were right.' She shook her head. 'How'd you find it? Kami told us the dragonball could be anywhere on this mountain.'
Launch's mouth dipped and bounced on her face. She had turned back around to face the deeper, too-dark-to-see part of the cave. 'I have many talents. Deduction, in the right conditions, being one of them.' Launch paused. 'Did you know that a yeti lives on this mountain?'
Suno shot a look at Launch's back. 'Really?'
'Really. I saw this particular yeti hauling around something shiny and orange once. Knew where she lived, too, because I tracked her one time to figure out where she might be stashing the dragonball.' Launch paused again. 'So, put two and two together…'
Chiaotzu's expression dropped in an entirely different way from earlier. 'Oh. This is that yeti's cave, then.'
'Yep.'
'Ah. Well… okay. Can we leave?' Suno asked hastily.
'Sure- you heard Kami,' Launch said, rubbing the dragonball with the corner of her jacket. A layer of frost had built up on its surface, making the inlaid stars and orange color seem distant. 'Things on Namek are dicey. The dragonballs need to be ready ASAP.'
'I'm not talking about the dragonball!' Suno snapped. 'I'm talking about the yeti!'
Launch came back over to them and put on a mocking face. 'What? Does the big bad yeti scare you? We could easily cream her if need be. We're probably- I don't know- three, four hundred times stronger than she is.'
'I don't care!' Suno stressed. This cave is small and dark and there's a pounding blizzard boxing us in from outside! I don't like the idea of being stuck in here with-'
A growl, low and drawn-out, suddenly rushed out from the deeper end of the cave. Launch, Suno, and Chiaotzu seized up.
'RUN!' And they dashed out of the cave, snow stinging their faces, and hurtled down the path they had come by.
0o0o0
On the side of a cliff, birds nestled into their nests and cowered. A pterodactyl, hoarding a prime platform halfway up to the cliff's top, preened and stretched its limbs. Since making its roost here, it had pushed out a sizable chunk of the inhabitants of the bird colony taking up the cliff-side. It was happy it had done so. It was a prideful dinosaur.
So unused to being challenged, the pterodactyl failed to notice a flabby-looking human roll himself over the edge of its platform.
Yajirobe patted himself down, and admired the majestic beast spread its wings. He muttered: 'Wow.'
At the sound of Yajirobe's voice, the dinosaur jumped. Its eyes shot to Yajirobe, studied him, and then in a show of what it thought of him, stepped forward and roared straight into Yajirobe's face. His clothes pressed back against his body, and all around him, birds, startled by the sound, swooped into the air and flew off.
Yajirobe wrinkled his nose and coughed.
A few seconds later, the pterodactyl was thrown off the edge of the platform and plummeted to the distant and foggy earth below. Holding his sword by the pommel he had swiped the dinosaur with, Yajirobe frowned and turned to its nest. After a moment spent looking, his hand latched onto a round object under the straw and thresh. He fished out the three-star dragonball.
'Nice!' he exclaimed to no-one. He looked over the nesting area once more, then turned and approached the platform's edge. 'Time to… err…' Yajirobe leaned forward to gaze down at the misty ground below. It was a long way down, and though he wasn't tired, he enjoyed climbing down much less than climbing up. Mr. Popo's gonna have to come get this dragonball eventually, and when they do, they'll be on that carpet. It wouldn't be much trouble for them to give me a ride back down...
The more he pictured Mr. Popo riding in on his magic carpet, the wind and sun on the deity's back, the more Yajirobe grinned. 'Yeah… they won't mind…' he muttered as he sat down and reached for the satchel resting on his left hip. He pulled out a triangular-shaped rice ball, closed his eyes in anticipation, and bit into it.
0o0o0
Retu knocked three times on the plain brown door before his patience gave up. If he was still on crutches, he would have whacked whoever opened this door with them.
Hmm. Standing on a porch in the middle of nowhere, somewhere on the outskirts of West City, Retu counted his blessings. Not needing crutches anymore, even if that deprived him a useful thing to whack people with, was a good thing. Overcoming his mental blocks were good. Realizing that he could use his ki to walk without crutches was good. Reminding himself of these facts were good.
Didn't make him any less unhappy to not have crutches at this very moment, though. Sighing, Retu knocked on the door once more. If he didn't get a response in the next few seconds, he would just climb up onto the roof, consequences be damned-
'Excuse me?'
Retu's gaze jolted up. A middle-aged woman, who looked as displeased as her voice sounded, stood in the doorway, glaring at him. A double-barreled shotgun, gripped near the trigger with her right hand and held at the stock with her left, was pointed at a spot about a foot above and to the right of his head.
Retu immediately put on his best smile.
'Hi,' he began. 'Are you the owner of this house?'
The woman, without letting go of her glare, leaned out of the doorway and looked to her left and right, glancing at the open stretch of land, devoid of any structures of any kind, that marked this dirt road in either direction. 'I am,' she answered as she leaned back. 'How'd you get here?' she asked suspiciously.
'I came here by plane, which is in a capsule,' Retu lied. He had flown, but he didn't want to throw anything weird at an already unwelcoming homeowner. 'Speaking of- I'm a representative for Capsule Corp. in West City. You know- the company that makes capsules? We've recently taken an interest in your house- your roof, specifically. It's got- it's got an interesting design- we have an interest in it. So, what I'm really saying is- can I go up on your roof?'
The look this woman gave him was… sticking with the theme, and was utterly unconvinced by his rambling, but to Retu's surprise, after a moment she made a face and nodded. 'Whatever,' she said, sounding bored. 'Do whatever you want out here- not like there's anything you could do to nothin'.' Then the door slammed closed.
For a moment Retu stood on the porch, listening to the woman recede further into her house. Once he was sure he had actually been given permission, his face did a little dance and he backed away from the front door. After examining one side of the house, he flew upward.
Landing on the roof- which was slanted down at the edges and close to flat in the middle- Retu walked over to the house's brick chimney on the far side. Once there, he clambered on top of it, laid himself flat on it, squinted into its dark interior as best he could, and stuck a hand down it.
A second later, grunting, Retu straightened, holding the two-star dragonball in his hand. He lifted it, examined it against the day's light, and rubbed away streaks of orange by rubbing his thumb over its soot-covered exterior. 'How the heck did you get lodged in this woman's roof?...' he muttered to himself, rotating it in his hand.
Curious, he thought about the chances of this until he remembered he was… still on this person's roof. Alright… As quietly as he could, he tiptoed to the roof's edge, slipped the dragonball into his backpack, and set off into the air. I hope I don't give that woman too much paranoia… Mr. Brief better not direct me to another dragonball stuck at a place like this...
0o0o0
A tray of tea, comprised of a white porcelain cup and kettle, was laid out in Baba's parlor on her favorite coffee table before her. Resting on her crystal ball a few feet away, hands folded, she looked over the thin wisps of vapor curling away from the cup. She liked her tea hot. If she didn't drink her tea soon, it would no longer be hot. So… she unclasped one of her hands and reached for the tea… I should drink it now…
Her hand made it halfway to the cup when it halted, and cursing, Baba withdrew it and shook her head. Curse my conscious! Never could drink tea without it being clear...
She was all too aware of the events going on Earth at the moment- or, at least, as much as she needed to know. She wasn't sure how exactly it had happened, but Kami was back alive, and that meant there was a mad dash among every person of importance on this planet for the dragonballs. To undo all the damage that invader had done, no doubt.
Baba had no interest in searching for some ham-fisted artifacts- she didn't think much of them in the first place. Made her job harder; or, more accurately, harder to justify doing when people tried to revive dead loved ones instead of using the skills of people like her to truly commune with the dead. There was a certain grace or resolution you received when you got that final, emphatic message from a deceased… especially when that deceased could impart wise words without imbuing them in the annoying traits they had in life.
But she had woken up today from a vision- and this vision told her exactly where one of those seven dragonballs, which would be hunted to the ends of the Earth, would be. The one-star dragonball rested in a stream bed not far from her coven in the cave. And she may have been able to ignore this fact if she also didn't know- she felt, knew it like it was a rock lodged deep in her gut- that the current quest for the dragonballs was urgent. Potentially consequential. And, again, even though Baba didn't have the full measure of things, she knew enough to know that, somehow, every second counted.
She stared at her tea. The wisps of smoke were growing weaker. Scowling, Baba adjusted herself on her ball and swung her gaze across the room. 'Devilman!' she screamed.
One of the doors leading to her parlor swung open, and a- well, a man who looked like a Devil, black from his head to his toes with wings like a bat- stepped forward and kneeled. 'What is it that you require, Fortuneteller Baba?'
Baba scowled at him, too. 'Secure for me a dragonball! The one-star one, to be precise, is resting in a stream not far from here!' she barked, ramming her fist against the floating crystal ball she sat on. 'It should look like this, except that it's orange and has a star in it! Am I clear?'
'Crystal, Madam,' he replied without looking at her. 'I shall do so immediately.'
'And make sure to hand it off to Kami's assistant, Mr. Popo, when they come around!' Baba called out, extending a hand towards the open doorway Devilman had strode through. 'He'll be on a flying carpet!'
There was a backward wave of acknowledgment and the door closed. Baba frowned, and withdrew her hand. 'Oh… did I get that right?' she muttered to herself. 'Is Mr. Popo a genie? An attendant? A spiritual steward?' Pondering, Baba leaned forward, cupped the cup of tea, and sipped. Perfect temperature. 'Hmm… I'll have to ask Kami the next time I see him. Next time he dies then, hah!'
0o0o0
They had spent hours trudging through the wilderness, blind to where they should be going. Without a dragon radar, they were, at best, making guesses as to where a dragonball could be- at worse, they were fumbling around several hundred miles from the nearest one.
Today, however, was not a "worst" type of day, because when the sun began to dip in the sky, Gohan broke free of Chi-Chi's grasp, climbed on top of a familiar purple dragon that had appeared out of nowhere, and led everyone on a wild chase as the fledgling flew crazily through the sky with a toddler on its back- and when that dragon was caught by Chi-Chi on a hillside, and she wrestled him to the ground, Rayne, who was watching this from the sky above, noticed a glint coming from a run of boulders to her right.
A minute later, with Chi-Chi, Puar, Oolong, Gohan, and even his apparent dragon pet crowding behind her, Rayne pulled away from the ground with the four-star dragonball. 'Holy freakin' moly,' she said, eyes wide. 'I found- we found it,' she landed on, turning to everyone else. 'The four-star ball, thanks to you two and your craziness,' she said, squatting and patting Icarus and Gohan on their heads. Gohan reached for the ball, like a child reaching for something to play with, and grateful, Rayne handed it over to him. With wonder, Gohan took the ball, set it in his lap, and stared at it.
Chi-Chi, arms still wrapped around Icarus, released her grip, and the dragon hopped away and sat next to Gohan, staring at the dragonball in the same way he was. She watched this, as did she watch Rayne, Puar, and Oolong make an ad hoc circle around Gohan and Icarus.
Rayne turned to Chi-Chi. Looking on them from only a few feet away, her gaze seemed much farther away than that. Rayne walked over. 'What are you thinking, Chi?'
'It's… funny,' Chi-Chi replied, speaking quietly enough so that only they-two could hear. Her gaze remained centered on the circle of people in front of her. 'The four-star dragonball has a history.'
'Meaning?'
Chi-Chi paused, and looked at Rayne. Her face was a mixture of joy and melancholy, and captivated with its ambiguity. 'Do you know who I named Gohan after?'
Rayne made a shrug of her shoulders.
'No? Then I'll have to tell you sometime. I-' Chi-Chi stopped, and spent a moment rubbing her hand across her cheek as if there was a tear was running down it. If one was there, Rayne hadn't noticed it, as her gaze had gradually drifted down to the ground as their conversation grew more… not what she had expected. Perhaps she was just a little out of it- she still couldn't believe she had found a dragonball without a dragon radar.
After a pause, Chi-Chi resumed. 'Just… things have a way of repeating, sometimes. I made this happen. And it's beautiful… and a little sad.' Chi-Chi shook her head. 'Sorry. I should stop rambling on.'
'You don't have to apologize, Chi-Chi,' Rayne said a little awkwardly, while staring down at the ground. 'It's okay if you're rambling. It's okay if you're a little sad… I think.'
'Yeah? You think?'
Rayne blushed. She had gotten better with this kind of stuff, but she still wasn't perfect. Not sure what to say to that, Rayne looked back to Chi-Chi- but she had resumed her distant look from earlier, and was staring away from her again. Taking this as a cue that their conversation was over, Rayne breathed a sigh of relief and turned back to gathering in front of them.
0o0o0
'You're joking.'
'Look at my face! I wish I was!'
'Shh! Quiet!' Mai flung her hands over Shu's mouth and dipped her head to the right. Together, they both looked and saw that Pilaf was still snoring away in his luxury, comically large king-size bed. 'Outside,' she whispered, and the two of them quickly exited the tent.
The forest around them was dense and creeping, which made seeing things in the dawn gloom harder. Pilaf's tent took up most of the clearing and had left little room for Shu and Mai's tents, or anything else, for that matter- they had been forced to put most of their expeditionary equipment in another clearing nearby.
Once Mai quietly dropped the flap to Pilaf's tent behind her, she rounded on Shu. 'You're sure it was there?' she pressed him.
Shu, who looked visibly distressed, gave a vigorous nod. 'I swear!' he replied. 'Clear as day! Orange, same shape, heck, it even had all seven stars! It's the same one!'
'But that doesn't make sense! We couldn't find it for months, and now it just appears out of thin air right mixed in with our stuff?'
'I know, I know! It's crazy! But it's there!'
Mai made a helpless sound of annoyance and wrapped her arms around her body. 'This is bad, bad!' she said, wiggling past Shu towards the edge of the clearing. 'We can't tell Pilaf we found the ball after just telling him we lost it! It'd make us look like fools! He'd lose it!' She swung back around to Shu. 'He might even kill us!'
'Well,' Shu said slowly, wrinkling his nose, 'I don't think he would- I'm not even sure he could- kill us-'
'And how do you know!?' Mai said, stepping up to Shu. 'He might already suspect that we lied about when we had found out the ball had gone missing- maybe he knows it disappeared months ago and NOT LAST WEEK!'
Too stunned by Mai's outburst, Shu said nothing. He started trembling.
Mai saw this, and her face softened. 'Alright… alright,' she said, slowing her breathing. 'I think I got a little carried away. Let's go to the equipment, confirm with all certainty that it's back with our stuff, and go from there. We shouldn't panic. Okay?'
Shu nodded. 'Oh… okay.'
About a minute later, they stepped into a clearing bursting with supplies, crates, machinery, vehicles- everything they could possibly need while this deep into the wilderness. Immediately, Mai halted and extended an arm, stopping Shu as well. '...Who is that?' she asked, drawing her gaze to the far end of the camp.
Shu squinted- his vision for anything over thirty feet away wasn't very good. 'Yeah, what is that?'
'Who,' Mai corrected, unstrapping her pistols from their holsters on either side of her. 'That's definitely a person- and they're rummaging through our stuff.'
'Oh, jeez,' Shu muttered, pulling out his sword. 'I really need glasses.'
Mai huffed. 'Come on,' she said, leading Shu forward.
The person she saw under the shade of one of their tarps- who had their back to them and looked pitch-black in the darkness underneath- Mai discovered was actually pitch-black in color, except for the white pants, white turban, and red sash and sleeveless vest they wore.
Mai stopped just before she went under the tarp and leveled her pistols. 'Freeze,' she said icily. 'You're rummaging through stuff that doesn't belong to you.'
Shu stopped at her side and brandished his sword in front of him. 'Yeah! Show yourself!'
The person rummaging through their stuff froze. The fingers on their right hand flexed and, out of nowhere, came to grip the seven-star dragonball. Mai's eyes hadn't finished widening before the person in front of her disappeared entirely.
The tip of Shu's sword hit the dirt. 'Where'd they-'
'Behind you,' an indescribably calm voice said to them.
Mai and Shu spun around. Hovering a few feet away and above them, the black-as-night thief stood on a floating carpet, was rigid as a board, had the dragonball in one hand, waved at them, and smiled. 'You have my thanks,' they said. Then, without any explanation, they simply disappeared.
For a long time after this, Mai and Shu frantically looked around and searched their surroundings, and for an even longer time after that, sat in the middle of that clearing in silence.
Finally, Shu made a noisy swallow, and said: 'Well- that solves our problem of what to tell Pilaf, I guess.'
'Yeah,' Mai said weakly, 'I guess it does.'
0o0o0
Balancing the meticulously detailed statue of Shenron- which was half as big as him- with both hands, Korin lumbered out of the main complex and onto the wider outside of the Lookout. The air was always brisk out here. Maybe it had something to do with this place's ambient energy; maybe it was just plain cold. Either way, Korin tightened his grip on his statue and huddled his arms a little bit closer to his body.
He never understood how he felt less at ease up here than Kami- his fur surely had to be warmer than what the Guardian wore.
Kami was standing near the Lookout's edge, opposite of the complex. He was in the same position Korin had left him in- one hand on his staff, one rubbing his forehead above his nose.
'Still have that headache?' Korin asked while he delicately placed the statue down behind Kami.
'Yes,' Kami replied glumly. When he turned to Korin, the cat saw that Kami's eyes were clenched shut in pain. 'It is… very debilitating.'
Korin frowned. 'Do you need to lie down?'
'No,' Kami said, waving away Korin's concerns. 'I can do so after this. First… I must make sure everything is properly attuned for the dragon.'
'Attuned?' Korin asked, singling out a word. 'I don't understand.'
'Things may have become… unaligned while I was dead,' Kami said. 'I am sorry if I am not explaining this well-'
'You aren't 100%, I get it,' Korin said. 'You're just checking to make sure everything is fine- that's the gist of it, right?'
Kami nodded. 'Yes, that is "the gist".' Kami took a deep breath, then opened his eyes and held out one of his hands inches away from the statue. 'This will only take a moment.'
The statue began to glow, and at the same time, a white, pure light started to emanate from Kami's outstretched palm. The two sources of light commingled for a brief time, then as quickly as they appeared, they separated and returned to their respective sources. When the light had fully dissipated, Kami took another deep breath and placed both his hands on his staff.
'So… everything good?' Korin asked.
'I made a change,' Kami said, before he turned and started to walk away to the Lookout's complex. 'You may place the statue back when you so wish.'
Korin glanced back at Kami. 'What? What'd you change?'
'I am now going to go rest,' Kami announced without interrupting his walk. Korin wasn't sure if he had heard his last question. 'Please- wake me when Mr. Popo summons the dragon.'
Korin watched as Kami receded. In different circumstances he would have chased after the Guardian and pestered him until he got an answer. But he would wait to ask the Guardian what exactly he had done until he felt better. Kami gets a pass. He was dead not too long ago.
Another wind blew across the Lookout's surface, and feeling a chill, Korin tensed and swung back to face out to the sky. Something occurred to him. Wait. Does he expect me to keep a tab on things while he's resting?
Sighing, and with his staff in one hand, Korin strode past the statue of Shenron and came to the Lookout's very edge. 'How do I even do that?...'
Glancing around to make sure he was alone, Korin puffed out his chest, put his weight on his staff, and closed his eyes in the same way Kami had done so earlier. He tried to tune into the Lookout's energy to see if he could get a telepathic hold of Mr. Popo. At first, he felt nothing. At first.
Huh. I'm definitely feeling… something.
0o0o0
Seated in his lawn chair with his hands folded in his lap, King Kai was ruminating about his past- among other things, as his eyes traced flashes of red sparking across his planet and the heavy panting that followed- when something prodded against his mind. It took him a second to realize that he was being contacted. 'Who is this?' he asked, matter-of-fact.
Silence. 'I know you're still there,' King Kai said, annoyed. 'I can sense you.'
'...Who are you?' the voice asked, uncertain. 'You sound familiar.'
'So we're playing that game, huh? Who put you up to this?' King Kai demanded. 'West Kai? East?'
'Kais?... no. I'm… not really sure what I'm doing.'
'This is a prank, right?' King Kai asserted. 'Must be. Well, let me tell you- you started a war, my friend. I've got nothing better to do than to make your life a never-ending misery of goofs and gaffes! I'm going to destroy you! You should have never called me!'
'Wasn't trying to call you…' the voice muttered. 'Was trying to get ahold of someone collecting the dragonballs.'
King Kai sat up in his chair. 'What'd you say? Dragonballs? Who is this? You're not Kami.'
'Oh- wait!' the voice explained. 'You're King Kai, aren't you! Ah! Now it makes sense.'
'Where's Kami? Who are you?'
'He's resting- and I'm Korin. I think you heard me earlier when you talked to Kami with Krillin.'
'Korin, eh? I'll put that name to the voice, but listen- what's the situation with the dragonballs?'
King Kai heard the sound of what he thought was a shrug. 'Not sure.' Korin answered.'I was trying to figure that out when I accidentally started talking to you.'
'So- you don't have the dragonballs ready yet?'
'Not yet, no.'
'Okay, okay,' King Kai sighed. 'That's not ideal.'
'You gonna elaborate on that?'
'I've been checking in on Namek every hour or so- judging from how things are going right now, we're going to have to make use of the Earth's dragonballs soon. Like, real soon.'
'That bad?'
'If I'm right- and I'm hoping I'm not- yes.'
'I see.'
Some time passed before King Kai spoke again. 'Korin, can you do everything Kami can? Are you able to talk to everyone on Earth, coordinate things, stuff like that?' he asked.
'I can try, at least.'
Korin heard King Kai grunt. 'That'll have to do, then,' the galactic deity said. 'Contact me when everything is ready on your end. And, crossing my fingers that I don't have to, I'll relay to you any relevant events on Namek if they occur.'
'Got it.'
0o0o0
With a show of strength, Piccolo landed on top of the spire shrouded in his deep blue aura. He doubted that, when a few Namekians exited from the hall soon after, any one of them could tell how rattled he was beneath the swaths of blue that surrounded him.
Which is for the best. His heart was still thrumming in his chest, unceasing since it had kicked into a frenzy a few minutes past. Whatever joy he had felt earlier while obliterating his enemies had turned bitter in his mouth. A nagging sense of wrongness refused to leave him, or his thoughts, whenever he thought of the Namekians. And, now, with only his blue aura separating him from them… it was too much. Too many thoughts and feelings, unbeckoned, uncalled, filled his mind. None of it made any sense. These people… feel...
Through the blue haze surrounding him, Piccolo saw one of the Namekians approach. Unconsciously, his aura flickered and waned. It was the one who had spoken to him before- Moori. I've… never heard that name before… and yet…
'Piccolo?' Moori said, as if he didn't know who he was talking to. The elder's gaze searched him up and down. 'You are Piccolo?'
'Have you lost your mind?' Piccolo growled, baring his fanged canines. 'Going senile like Guru-'
Piccolo's mouth clamped shut. His confusion, written clearly on his face, now matched that of Moori's. He muttered under his breath and turned away.
Moori grabbed his arm, and forced him to look back. 'Guru died- and you did not meet him before that happened,' Moori said, his eyes just as prodding as his statement. 'Nail would have no reason to tell you this happened, nor could have the humans informed you- so how do you know of Guru?'
Piccolo's mouth opened and closed. His mind was rallying around an answer he couldn't express. A feeling that he felt he didn't feel.
'You have done a terrible thing,' Moori muttered, letting his grip slide off of Piccolo's arm. 'And you do not even comprehend it.' A nervous laugh rustled from the elder. 'You… you don't even know. You are ignorant.'
In a different, more despondent tone of voice, Moori asked: 'If you didn't know, how did you do this? How?'
'I don't answer to you,' Piccolo grated, stepping back. 'I... ' Again, Piccolo's mouth opened and closed. A look of helplessness was glued to his face. '...' Abruptly, Piccolo turned and walked. He came to the edge of the spire's top, from where he could look out on the rolling green and blue of the land all around them, sat, and appeared to meditate.
Moori, feeling more like a specter who could only look onto events instead of an actual living being, watched Piccolo do this. Behind him, he could sense unrestrained unease among his kin. Chewing the inside of his mouth, he turned and moved towards them.
'He said nothing,' Tsuno said bitterly, standing at the head of the group. 'He does not know. But you do, Moori. What are you hiding from us?' The other Namekians nodded assiduously with Tsuno's line of questioning. 'What has happened to him?'
'I am hiding nothing,' Moori denied, frowning. 'I would never hide anything from you all-'
'And yet you know something,' Tsuno said, stepping closer. His eyes were burning. 'But you do not say it.'
Moori hesitated. He sought something in the unfriendly faces of his kin, and sighed. 'Perhaps you see it as hiding,' Moori said. 'For me, it is… a problem of expression. Piccolo has done something only Guru had ever seen- and I am still struggling to accommodate the experience and knowledge Guru gave me before he passed. I have a sense of what Piccolo did, but not yet know how to explain it.'
'What is that sense, then?' Tsuno pressed.
'The sense is what you observed. What Piccolo did to Leera… I am certain that it is irreversible.'
Something flashed in Tsuno's eyes. 'That- that may be-'
Before Tsuno could go on, a clunk sounded from the other side of the spire's top. Not five feet from Piccolo- who, it seemed, was oblivious or uncaring to this event- did Bez, carrying Bulma, crumple onto the ground.
Moori made immediate eye contact with Dende. The younger Namekian nodded and advanced towards them. Moori appraised Tsuno, recognized the elder suspending their discussion from a shift in his posture and a softening in his expression, and together, they strode over to Bez and Bulma.
Dende already had his hands over Bulma when he arrived. Green bands radiated from his palms and lapped against Bulma's skin. She was, judging by her appearance, far less injured than the person who had carried her here. Moori's gaze turned to Bez and registered how maimed- with his armor almost gone, dried blood caking every open inch of his body, and bruises crowding on his skin- the purple alien looked.
'Dende, why aren't you healing him first?' Tsuno asked, pointing a finger towards Bez.
'I told him to heal her first,' Bez said, holding a hand over one of his arms and grimacing. 'She had a head injury. More worried about that than anything else.'
Tsuno looked over Bez. 'You are in horrible pain,' he stated instead of asking.
'I'm pretty friggin' tired, but beyond that, I won't die. I can wait.'
The two Namekian elders exchanged a glance of disbelief. 'How did you fly up here in this condition?' Moori asked.
A distant grin wrapped itself around Bez's face. 'That's a story I'll tell one day,' he mused.
At this moment, Dende leaned away from Bulma. 'I have healed her to the best of my abilities- but I think she will not be awake for some time.' Dende paused, and wiped a sleeve across his forehead. Sweat beaded on his face. 'I wish I could have done more.'
'It appears that you have already done too much,' Moori cautioned, acting like a parent towards Dende- which, even though Dende originated from Guru and not him, was a role he had to grow more accustomed to with Guru gone. Now that I think about it… I'll have to do that one day. Lay new Namekians. What an odd concept...
'It is my burden to bear,' Dende said. 'No-one else can do what I can.' Even as he said this, he moved over to Bez. The purple alien was too concerned with managing his own pain to pay attention to their conversation.
'You are a child,' Tsuno said quietly.
Dende didn't respond. He grit his teeth and waves of green lapped against Bez.
Another sound rolled across the spire. Moori and Tsuno spun. Behind them, with much more grace and control than Bez had managed, Nail landed and placed Tien and Yamcha's unconscious bodies on the ground. Ignoring some minor injuries, they looked largely unharmed.
A pang of anxiety hit Moori. Abruptly, he said: 'I want you to take the Namekians inside, Tsuno.'
Tsuno balked at him. 'Why?'
'For all the success current events show… I will need to talk to Nail about what we witnessed.' His gaze swept over to the other Namekians. 'What we all witnessed. And this discussion would be best if held not in front of the others.'
'Truthfully?' Tsuno asked, skepticism clear in his voice. 'Or do you want to divulge information to Nail that you do not wish to divulge to me or the others.'
'Things have not changed since earlier. I cannot explain what happened. That will only come with time.'
'So you say.'
'You trust me?'
'Right now, not much.'
A standoff occurred between them, each one staring at the other, refusing to back down. In the end, something in Moori's gaze- pleading, or desperation- won out.
Frowning, Tsuno walked away. After exchanging a few words with the other Namekians, as a group, they entered the hall. Relieved, Moori walked over to Nail.
Nail had watched all this. 'You dismissed the other Namekians,' he observed as the last of his kin filed into the hall. 'You might have lied. Either way, I imagine you have a reason for moving them inside.'
Moori's frown from earlier returned, and was twice as pronounced. 'I am going to ask you a question, Nail- did you notice if anyone was missing when you arrived?
Nail's attention flickered back over to the entrance of the hall. His features pinched after a moment. 'Leera,' Nail said. 'Leera wasn't present. Where is he?'
Moori didn't reply. Nail looked back over to him- the grand elder was as pale as death. 'Something has happened,' Moori said, eyes unbudging from Piccolo, who ignored them from the far side of the spire.
'I don't appreciate your cryptic messaging,' Nail remarked sharply. 'Speak clearly to me.'
'I am trying the best I can,' Moori said in a strained voice. 'I cannot explain what happened- only describe it. Piccolo… took in Leera.'
Nail's mouth twisted. '"Took in"? What does that mean?'
Moori took a deep breath. 'Piccolo was dying. Leera approached and laid a hand on him while waiting for Dende to rush over. And, then… light. Leera's form blurred away, turned into white light, and flowed into Piccolo's body. His wounds healed in a matter of seconds, and by the end of it, no trace of Leera even having existed remained. He was… gone. Utterly.'
Nail's face was expressionless. 'You are describing something familiar to me. A technique taught to me by Guru when I was tasked to be the protector of our people.' Nail looked over towards Piccolo, then back to Moori. 'A technique to be used in only the direst of circumstances- that is what Guru said. Only when total obliteration threatened us. And, even then, it was to be used with extreme caution.' Nail halted. 'I am sure you know the conditions- you have Guru's knowledge available to you. Once the technique is performed, its products are permanent. Two Namekians bonded together through the technique can never uncouple. They become one body, and nearly one spirit and mind.'
'I am aware,' Moori said.
'So it seems that Leera knew of this technique, and that he consented with Piccolo-'
'No! Leera did not know of this technique!' Moori burst in whispers. 'And, furthermore, it is impossible that he could have consented in the short amount of time he was in contact with Piccolo! What Piccolo did was something else entirely- something a Namekian hasn't done in centuries! Something atrocious!'
Nail appraised Moori. 'It now sounds like you understand what happened.'
'... I understand what I just said, and nothing more,' Moori stated. 'It, at least, accords with the terror I've felt since it happened- whatever Piccolo did, it was regarded by Guru as… monstrous. The associations in Guru's knowledge are clear. It is a horribly evil act to consume a Namekian soul in the way that Piccolo did.'
Things went quiet between them. They both glanced over and saw that Piccolo had not moved from his meditative sitting position.
'There are other consequences beyond this, of course. Consequences I'm sure you've noticed,' Moori said after a time, shifting gears.
Nail's gaze turned back to Moori. 'It was obvious from the moment I arrived. Piccolo's strength surpasses mine now.'
'Then you are aware of the threat he poses.'
'I was always aware.' Nail pointedly looked at Moori. 'I would have killed him if allowed to when he first rushed here. I cannot do that now.'
Moori let that sentence hang in the air. 'This may be for the best.'
Nail rounded on Moori, sudden anger in his voice. '"For the best"? After all you've said? He could go about doing what he did to Leera, to all of us-'
Fighting against his own anxiety, Moori calmly raised a hand and silenced Nail. 'I do not think he could, or even would, do that.'
'What makes you think that?'
Moori's features deepened. 'For one, he did what he did to Leera on death's door, and not before. Once you left, if he was in control of this technique, he could have used it at his leisure on us. He did not. Thus, I do not think he can control it. I also do not think he used it consciously with Leera. It, perhaps, triggered because he was near death. Second… I realize now that I had a revealing conversation with him earlier. He was not pleased with what he had done, nor did he even seem to understand it- he was distressed, and could not explain why he knew things only Leera would have known. His knowledge of what he did lags, and I think that upsets him. Judging from how unsettled he was, I do not think this will change in the immediate future.'
'Hmm.' Nail's eyes lifted to the green sky. High, high above him, he could red specks galloping across the atmosphere. 'You've thought a lot about this.'
'You should probably kill him if given the chance, still.'
Nail tilted his head down. 'I guess I'll say it again: after everything you just said? You make it sound like he's not a present worry.'
'Present, yes. Just because he cannot control his technique and is distressed by it now does not guarantee that this will be the case in the future. Monsters are not born. They are made.'
'He is, as much as I dislike him, not a monster now.'
'And in twenty years? Thirty? Is it guaranteed this will still be true then?'
'No. I understand, then, and I agree.'
'You need not say that if you do not agree.' Moori searched for something in his mind. 'And do not let him touch you.'
Nail looked over Moori's shoulder. 'Dende is coming over.'
'Then we have spoken enough for now.'
0o0o0
Everything in Yamcha's consciousness lagged once Burter slammed the back of his head- and then he found his eyes were open, staring up at a familiar green face and sky. 'Dende,' he murmured.
The young Namekian, despite the visible signs of exhaustion creasing his face and wetting his skin, managed a weak smile. 'Nice to see you, too,' he said, before leaning back and taking in a lungful's worth of air.
Yamcha sat up. Once he did, a hand clapped him on the back. 'Miracles still happen,' Tien said cheerily, sitting to his right.
A grin appeared on Yamcha's face. 'You're unusually chipper.'
'Didn't think the next time I'd see you would be on this side of death,' Tien disclosed. 'At least, that was my thought as I lost consciousness…'
'I rescued you both,' Nail cut in about as unenthusiastic a manner as they would have expected. He was standing over them next to Dende. 'So I wouldn't call it a miracle.'
'It was you?' Yamcha asked, swinging his gaze to Nail. 'So- did you defeat the guy who knocked us out, too?'
'The red, short one?'
'We were attacked by a blue, tall one,' Tien replied, frowning.
'The red soldier took you two,' a voice spoke up. Bez entered into their circle. 'The blue soldier flew off. I saw everything from nearby.'
'You got away?' Yamcha asked, awed.
Bez's eyes darted away and back to them. 'Sort of… they lost track of me. Most of them.'
'Most?'
'Another time-' Bez replied. 'It's… not important.'
Tien looked around. 'Where's Bulma?'
Bez moved to the side- behind him, on the other side of the spire, Bulma was lying on the ground. 'She's still knocked out, but she's fine otherwise.'
'She got knocked out?' Yamcha questioned. Concern hardened his face. 'What happened?'
'I rescued her from the PTO,' Bez said, stiffening. I shouldn't speculate… not now. Too many unknowns… 'She'd been captured.'
'She was with the invaders?' Nail asked, furrowing his face in thought. 'When I left to rescue you two, she was with the Namekians- which means-'
Nail turned to the far end of the spire's top. 'Piccolo!' he called out. 'Come over here!.'
While Piccolo walked over, with Bez's help, Yamcha and Tien got to their feet. They examined each other- none of them had anything close to a full set of PTO armor on anymore. Led by Bez, they all disrobed what remained of the white plating and stripped down to their boots and black jumpsuit. What remained of their white gloves were peeled off as well.
'So are we finally ready, then?' Piccolo said as he joined them, running his eyes over the two humans and the purple alien.
Nail shot Piccolo a look. 'Did you know that one of the humans, Bulma, who had been with the Namekians, was captured?'
Piccolo returned Nail's look. 'No.'
'How did she get whisked away from the Namekians without you knowing? Do you know what a group of soldiers could have done to my people while you weren't paying attention?' Nail growled through his teeth. 'More innocent blood could have been spilled. You were tasked to protect them.'
'And I did,' Piccolo snarled back. 'Count them up if you like.'
Nail made a face- a dark, displaced face. 'And what if I found a single one was missing? What if one is gone- and you're to blame?'
Something flashed across Piccolo's body, in his hands and legs and face, that was akin to a jolt or bolt shocking his body. For the first time in Yamcha's and Tien's living memories, the prideful would-be King of Earth looked… shaken. To his core.
He quickly regained his composure, however. 'This is beneath me,' Piccolo huffed. 'We should be discussing what we're going to do next.'
'I saw you decimate a PTO army,' Bez revealed, assured that most, if not everyone present, was aligned against Piccolo at the moment. And Bulma was in the middle of that army. 'Shouldn't our work be done?'
In a show of contempt, Piccolo lifted his head and bared his fangs. 'If you were paying any attention beyond that, you would have known that there are still... ' Piccolo dropped off mid-sentence. His antennae twitched. 'Four. Four significant powers left on this planet.'
'What?' Nail asked. 'Why did you stop?'
Piccolo looked away. 'I thought… I thought there were five. I was mistaken. It's not important- either way, a group of powers is still on this planet and are probably intent on fighting us. So I intend to intercept this group of powers and kill them.'
Unseen by Piccolo, whose gaze was briefly turned away from the group, Nail appeared to severely scrutinize Piccolo. The moment passed, however, and Nail resumed his inexpressive veneer from earlier. 'Then we shall do so together. There is a vacated village a few miles away- it would be best if we fought what remains of the PTO there instead of here. Enough fighting has taken place here among my kin. I do not want to run the risk of any more collateral damage.'
'Fine by me,' Piccolo rumbled. 'I'll be better able to fulfill our deal without having to care for weak Namekians jumping in.'
At the mention or their deal, Nail gave Piccolo a strange look- this time, Piccolo noticed, and from apparent discomfort, turned away and walked to the edge of the spire. 'Soon my part will be finished,' he said without looking back at Nail or the others. 'When that happens, Nail, I expect you to fulfill yours.'
A surge of ki, enough to force Tien, Yamcha, and Bez to stagger back, bathed Piccolo. 'And one last thing-' Piccolo dictated as he was wrapped in dark blue streaks, '-make sure not to get in my way.' The color pooled at his feet and propelled him into the sky, and Piccolo flew into the distance.
Nail alone stood rigid throughout this, unaffected by the whipping of energy across and through him. When the wind died down, Tien, Yamcha, and Bez lowered their arms from their faces and relaxed their poses.
'...Woah,' Yamcha muttered. 'That was…'
'A message,' Tien completed Yamcha's sentence. He was grimacing. 'He wanted to make it clear the distance between him and us.'
'How did he get that strong?'
Tien's head swung to Nail. 'Was this part of your deal?'
Nail continued to stare off in the direction Piccolo had left by. 'My deal was to ensure Piccolo would fight alongside us until the end. It did not include making him stronger.' He paused, and looked at them. 'Are you coming with us?'
Yamcha, Tien, and Bez glanced at each other. 'You really think we'd be any help?' Bez asked.
'I know I'd be of help,' Tien said, stepping forward. 'Battles come down to a few moves, a few people, sometimes. I intend to be the difference if need be.'
'Besides,' Yamcha said as he stepped up next to Tien. He raised and clenched his hand into a fist. 'We've come this far. Why wouldn't we fight in the final battle of Namek?'
A corner of Tien's mouth arched up, and he turned to Yamcha. 'Final, huh? You say it with such certainty.'
'Call it a gut feeling,' Yamcha said, grinning similarly to Tien. 'So…' Both Yamcha and Tien glanced over to Bez. 'What were you saying earlier?'
A wild look rushed across Bez's face. 'Well, it's not like I can say no now,' he said, advancing in the same manner as Tien and Yamcha had. 'You've boxed me in,' he said with fake scorn.
'We're monsters,' Yamcha joked.
While Yamcha and Bez chuckled- and Tien was, admittedly, amazed that Yamcha was chuckling with someone who he had wanted to kill in cold blood just a few months ago- another thought popped into Tien's mind. 'What about the dragonballs?' he asked.
Nail looked at him. 'What about them?'
'Are they ready? And what wishes will they be used for?'
'Moori informed me the Earth's dragonballs will be ready soon. When that occurs, he will communicate with the proper people to carry out our planned wishes.'
'Which are?'
'It is my understanding Moori will move the planet first,' Nail informed them. 'There are still ships in the planet's orbit. Moori desires to wipe Namek off whatever map the PTO put it on to ensure no further invasions occur.'
'And the second wish?' Yamcha asked.
'He will direct the Earth to revive your friend Krillin- if the situation demands it. Otherwise, he will use the wish to revive everyone who has died in the invasion.'
Bez looked dead-on at Nail. 'You mean just the Namekians, right?'
'Are you serious?' Nail replied, audibly annoyed. 'Do you think we're going to revive people who slaughtered villages? Enough of this- are you ready?'
Tien, Yamcha, and Bez exchanged looks. 'As ready as we'll ever be,' Tien replied.
'Come, then-' Nail said, lighting his own ki and lifting off the ground. 'We should not leave Piccolo unsupervised for long.' With a blast of his white ki, he zoomed off. After a second, Yamcha, Tien, and Bez rushed after him.
0o0o0
As they approached, a sense of dread washed over Jeice and Recoome- the land was deformed, broken up, and from the sky, it was clear that various remains of a PTO army were strewn across the land. Broken scouters and armor. Bodies. Limbs.
Jeice and Recoome had seen grislier scenes on the occasions when the Force had been called in to wrap up planet-wide purges against an organized and competent fighting force- but this wasn't supposed to be a bloodbath. This operation included retrieving three renegades. So far, to achieve that goal, an entire PTO army had died.
Both of them had an unspoken fear in the back of their minds when they were faced with the raw carnage covering the land. This fear, with everything it entailed, was realized once they spotted the Captain. He was kneeling and bent, rigid, over a shape half-buried in the ground. The instant their boots tapped down, they realized who was beneath Ginyu.
Burter.
To their left, they saw Guldo standing by himself, looking lost among so much emptiness. Seeing them, he approached. 'You- you guys are okay?' he asked, his four eyes unsteady in their sockets. 'You're not hurt, are you?'
'Guldo… he can't be dead,' Jeice said in a quiet voice. 'He can't. What's going on?'
Guldo sniffled. 'When we arrived, we spent a few minutes looking… until we found Burter. He was dead- Captain said his ribs were broken. Said one of those ribs pierced a lung and filled it with blood. Right after this, the Captain pushed me, told me to back away.' Guldo looked back over to Ginyu's silent prostration. 'He's been like that ever since.'
'How long ago was that?' Jeice whispered.
'Half an hour ago.'
This realization hit Jeice and Recoome like a galactic hammer- he's been like this for half an hour? It was an amazingly sad testament to the Captain's capacity to grieve. No one else would have given Burter the mourning he deserved. Jeice, overwhelmed, crossed his arms and turned his head to one side, trying to hide the nascent streams of tears springing from his eyes.
Recoome, his comrade, a giant of a man, had gone even farther; he had unabashedly shed a tear and let it roll all the way down his face.
Guldo saw all of this, and at the same time he felt such a profound and salient experience of sadness and his own mortality, he found himself a little bit jealous of Jeice and Recoome's emotional prowess.
This is how they were for a time. There was nothing they could do except stand there and try to match the sorrow they saw from their Captain. They aimed to be like him, in all things.
Eventually, Ginyu lifted his head and turn it to them. His face looked like it had been pulled back over his skull. 'Jeice, Recoome- there's someone nearby. Please-' Ginyu shook his head. '-Please retrieve them.'
As best they could in their current state, Jeice and Recoome clicked their heels, saluted their Captain, and stiffened their lips. They found a reading on their scouters and flew over to a ridge in the earth to the west.
Guldo said nothing as Ginyu returned to his earlier pose, and was dead silent when Recoome and Jeice brought back a familiar face.
Zarbon was set down on the ground, held by Jeice and Recoome on either side of him. The commander of a now-defunct army couldn't stand on his own. Blood dripped slowly off of every part of him that pointed towards the ground.
To Guldo, Jeice, and Recoome's shock, Ginyu stood and wheeled to them- or, more specifically, Zarbon. Whatever strain that was on his face earlier was gone. Pure, unfiltered, inconsiderate fury lived in it now.
'Why do you live?' Ginyu said to Zarbon, his voice overflowing with suspicion and malice.
Zarbon, whose head was resting on his chest, was unable to lift it and look at Ginyu. 'I… I don't know,' he said in a weak voice. 'I should be dead-'
'Yes, you should,' Ginyu snarled. 'Do you know what you've done? Do you?'
Weakly, Zarbon shook his head. It popped into his mind that he was in Ginyu's position not too long ago. Things change.
'Your incompetence killed one of my men!' Ginyu screamed, loud enough to blow loose strands of Zarbon's hair away from his face. 'For thirty years, the Ginyu Force- its record, its honor- had remained unblemished! YOU ENDED THAT!''
Spit literally impacted Zarbon's face. He could feel the heat of hatred radiating off of Ginyu. And, yet, maybe because he agreed that he should have been dead, and because he had experienced such unbearable and unreal pain already, and because he considered anything between now and his eventual, true death inconsequential, he chuckled.
'I would hardly call your record… "unblemished",' he managed, his eyes barely making out the upturned dirt below him. 'And, to pin this on me… how we got trounced… how men handpicked by me, men I trusted, were cut down, slaughtered… to say that I caused all tha- AAUUUGHK!'
Ginyu rammed a fist into Zarbon's chest, breaking ribs and causing Zarbon to lurch and hack out blood and saliva. 'Shut up,' he snarled. 'Stupid assholes don't talk. They get talked to.' With a gesture, Ginyu got Jeice and Recoome to wrench the shaking alien off the ground and hold him upright. For a moment, it looked like Ginyu was going to ram another blow into Zarbon, but ultimately, he stepped back. He stood, unmoving.
'I've decided,' Ginyu announced. He stepped closer to Zarbon and cupped the alien by his jaw and yanked it up so he could see into Zarbon's eyes.
'I was going to wait until the end of the mission for this- but you've brought this on yourself,' Ginyu said, making sure to enunciate every word. 'You, stupid, moronic asshole. That means you need to be talked to. But there are other stupid assholes on this planet who need to be talked to, too, if the empty-handedness of my men is anything to judge by.'
A few feet away, thinking they could not get any more stressed, Recoome and Jeice got more stressed.
Ginyu stared into Zarbon's bloodshot eyes. He let the head drop back down.
'So let's take a trip, shall we?'
A/N: Hey all- thought this was going to be a shorter chapter. Looks like I got goof on my face.
As for the content, we're getting a needed glimpse of Earth in this chapter before the final (maybe?) showdown on Namek kicks off. And sorry again for the delay on this chapter- I would really like to get a chapter out a week over the summer, but so far, that's been tough for me to achieve. Doesn't mean I won't stop trying, though.
Reviews:
LWexe: Roshi had to do something badass while dead, right?
Rowan Citrian: Glad you enjoyed it! Wonder what your thoughts are on this chapter, then…
And I answered your question via PM, but just so everyone is 100% on the same page as me- Leera, one of the Namekian elders, was absorbed!
Cityracer said this:
I have finally managed to read the story to the end, and what a ride it has been. I have been thinking about how to structure this review for a while now, and I'm going to share some basic thoughts and then list my pros and cons in detail.
I originally found this story after looking for a story that had Yamcha as a useful character. Seeing that this story had a lot of favorites and followers, I decided to give it a try. At first, I thought it was good, but it didn't stand out. Still, it was worth reading. By around chapter 12, this really began to change for the better. It was clearly ahead of the pack, and it only continued to improve. At this point, it is likely the best fanfiction I've ever read. I am a big fan.
Pros:
- Unique Abilities: I really enjoyed that you made your own abilities up. They all feel natural and well made. Even something as simple as the Ki sensing candle was enough to get me excited. My favorite technique was Chi-Chi's fire technique, just because we see Ki used differently than usual. I also like the fact that the Wolf Fang Fist is actually useful in this story.
- Kakarot: I really enjoyed his portrayal. At first, he was a fairly simplistic psychopath. However, as his character arc progressed, he slowly became great. At this point, Kakarot is my favorite character in the story. I hope he has more of a role to play in the future.
- Everyone has a place: One of my least favorite parts of the main series is that everyone except the strongest person basically did nothing. I really like that you've spent the time to give everyone a use. It really adds to the tension and the sense of danger.
- Bold risk taking: it would've been really easy to stick close to canon. I appreciate that you were willing to go your own way and truly make the story your own.
Cons:
- Krillin-centric: I get this prevailing sense that Krillin is the main character. He seems to be getting to do all the cool things. He climbed Korin tower first, he got the Ultra Divine Water, he trained with Kami, and he gets to learn the Kaio-ken first. Very much like canon Goku.
Additional Thoughts:
I just want to share some random thoughts I had while reading. I wish the power pole was utilized as a weapon, it's one of my favorite fantasy weapons of all time. I secretly hope Yamcha and Bulma don't end up together, even if Vegeta doesn't become good and stay on earth. I just never thought that their relationship was very good. Although, I do think Yamcha should end up with someone. I also hope that we eventually have Goten in this story, as he is one of my favorite characters (alongside Yamcha).
Lastly, I would like to share my idea for a lighthearted, comedic moment. So, Bulma's power level should be higher after having to get used to three times earth's gravity, maybe from about 5 to 15. So, when she gets back to earth, some pervert is hitting on her. Bulma is mad, so she slaps the pervert and sends them slamming into a brick wall, breaking it. That would be hilarious.
I said this:
Love, love, love this review. Thank you so much for writing it. My detailed feedback, lovingly written:
Interesting how you talk about followers and favorites as a reason for looking into this fic. I was talking with my sister the other day and she mentioned how important those two stats are for getting the popularity ball rolling for a fic.
I would love to hear more specifically where/when/and why the story started to change from something that was good to something that stood out. Also would love to hear any recommendations as to what could be down for the first ten or so chapters to make them match the quality of the rest of the fic. I do worry sometimes that the first parts of this fic are a little uneven and could be improved to make the entry into this beast a bit easier/ more accessible for newcomers.
Best fanfiction you've ever read? Hot dang. I am so incredibly honored.
Fanfic authors should write their own moves/attacks/techniques more! It adds such an indelible mark to a story if you create this unique, badass moment that only exists in that one fic. I'm really glad you remembered Chi-Chi's fire technique at the 24th WMT that way- that was, in addition to making a technique that frames well with her background and provides for an inventive and interesting fight, definitely my intent.
I will totally own up to the fact that I wasn't exactly sure how to characterize Kakarot in a complex way at the beginning of this fic. Luckily, I found out that putting him in a room with Chi-Chi and other characters fleshes out his character in a much more interesting way than him sulking in the forest or acting like a straight up maniac. He was the basis for my rule of thumb- characterize characters by placing them with other characters. As for his future role in this story… we'll see!
I loved expanding the fighter bench in this story. Getting a bunch more guys (and girls!) onto the frontline makes it harder for the reader to figure out what's going to happen next (which you pointed out). Also gives me a lot more interesting tools as a writer to play around with in setting up fights and advancing the story. This approach can make group fights a little harder to write (and more often!) sometimes, but at the end of the day, and judging by your review, I think I made the right choice to do it.
Personally, I don't get the appeal of writing a story that adheres to canon like glue with only one or two changes. And even stories that have consequential divergences still end up feeling like a rehash. For me, the world and lore of DBZ is way too fun to not play around with concepts that were either kinda there or dropped in canon. IMO, it makes a more engaging story, and keeps me more engaged, when the story takes some wild (though logical) departures from canon.
Totally get the thing about Krillin. In some ways, he was my stand-in for Goku's parts in this story, which, looking back, I could have divvied up a bit better in Dragon Ball. But there will be… changes going forward. What I'm talking about will be very explicit soon.
I haven't given the power pole a proper role in this story yet… I'll have to think about what function and what limitations it might have. As a tool, it could aid in some very inventive fights...
Your comment on Bulma/Yamcha made me think about their characterizations and their relationship in this story… I don't want to divulge what my thinking on this ended up being, but I hope what I ultimately give you is satisfying.
I am definitely going to incorporate that gag with Bulma and her newfound strength. Perhaps not in the way you described it, but using it to freak out people (and combining it with what others perceive as an already imposing personality) would be fantastic. I am so glad you brought that fact up.
Alright, people: write more reviews like Cityracer! You'll get a whole chunk of the bottom of the chapter dedicated to you!
