POINTS TO PONDER
AN: A little cliche perhaps, but Paige strikes me as a shopper particularly for shoes. In 'Keep it in Check Mate' she said she spent $200 for her shoes. I've never spent that much on a pair of shoes in my life. And I can't resist thinking about how Walter will view regular boyfriend stuff. He's gonna be so lost. I love it!
This one is rated 'T' for a bit of suggestive playfulness on Paige's part.
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Once again he realized how much a genius with a 197 IQ still needed to learn about normal women. For instance, the circumstances that brought him to his current situation were wholly incomprehensible. He'd been trying to make sense of them for the last twenty minutes. He came up with nothing.
Walter O'Brien sat on a rickety, uncomfortable bench outside yet another shoe store pondering his latest unfathomable relationship dilemma. There had been many inexplicable happenings in the course of his time as Paige's boyfriend. This one was simply the latest.
Looking back he should have known something was up based on Ralph's reaction. It was an ordinary Saturday afternoon and he'd casually mentioned he needed to go by an electronics store for some components for a project he had going. He'd asked the boy genius if he wanted to go too. At first, Ralph agreed saying he could use a new infrared sensor for his robot's remote control he was trying to repair. But when Paige said she needed to do some shoe shopping and would like to ride along, the boy quickly backed out saying he had homework he needed to work on instead.
When Walter called, "See you soon," as he and Paige walked out the door, Ralph had snorted derisively.
At the time, Walter had been a bit puzzled, but dismissed it.
His own errand took less than four minutes. He found the items he needed including Ralph's sensor, took them to the register and paid for them. Done.
In the two hours and forty-nine minutes since then, they had been to no less than twelve stores and had bought everything but shoes. He feared his own shoes would need to be replaced after walking into every store in the greater LA area. He never knew there were so many 'adorable' trinkets and baubles and accessories, and each one needed to be lifted and inspected before being returned to the exact location where it was found. He didn't understand the purpose for any of the items much less the examination of them. After a good while of these repeated actions, he opted for sitting outside the stores acting as her coat rack while Paige went inside to shop. To pass the time, he played instructional You Tube videos on his phone until the battery died. Since then, he'd been considering the strange shopping experience.
At one point a burly, bald, leather-clad man with tattoo sleeves perched on the bench beside him. Not only was Walter made uncomfortable by the man's forced proximity, the bench wasn't made to accommodate their combined weight and he was afraid it might collapse under the stress of the two men and the numerous shopping bags in their laps.
"You here with your ol' lady?" The man growled in Walter's direction, his expression rather glum.
Trying to scoot toward the opposite end of the seat, but sliding toward the middle again due to the slant caused by the other man's mass, he answered in a tight voice, "I'm here with my girlfriend, yes. How did you know?"
"Your purse doesn't match your outfit," the man answered with a sarcastic glare, adjusting the hefty weight of his own neon pink and zebra-striped handbag and various parcels in his lap. "What're you in for?"
"I'm sorry? I don't understand. In for?"
"Yeah, man. Only two reasons a guy finds himself in our predicament. You either did something to make her mad, or you're trying to win points. Why the hell else would you be here? Me? I'm in it deep."
"I confess I've been sitting here trying to figure it out for a while. At least since my phone died. So, you say it may be because I did something wrong? I hadn't thought about that possibility, but I find I often do wrong things without knowing. So I guess punishment is entirely feasible."
It was at that moment the biker's wife exited the shop. The big man heaved himself up to a standing position and switched all the bags to one arm. He slapped Walter on the back nearly knocking him off the bench, and threw, "Hang in there!" over his shoulder as he lumbered off after the obviously miffed lady leaving Walter to wonder what he might have done to upset Paige.
In spite of the biker's words, he knew all females weren't inclined to drag their significant others around all afternoon 'shopping' while actually buying very little in proportion to what they looked over. For instance, he knew Happy wouldn't subject Toby to this treatment unless she was at a car or motorcycle expo. And once Megan had immigrated to the United States with him, she was no longer able stand or walk for long periods of time. She had done most of her personal shopping online or had Walter pick up specific items she needed. It was certainly a lot more efficient that way. He just couldn't fathom the need to spend hours doing…whatever this was. It reinforced the idea he must be in trouble for some reason.
Another half hour later, after Paige had bought herself no less than three pairs of shoes (Walter only owned a total of three pairs!) one to go with the 'cutest' sundress she found on sale and the 'perfect' earrings to match, and various other perfumes and lip colors and gewgaws, the couple was finally in the car headed home.
He turned to the love of his life and asked worriedly, "Did I do something wrong?"
Paige looked at him, obviously puzzled. "No. Why do you ask?"
"The man sitting beside me earlier told me there are only two reasons to end up shopping and holding all your girlfriend's stuff for her. He suggested it might be because I'm in trouble for something. Since I still sometimes kind of suck at 'romantic boyfriend stuff', I thought I may have done something to upset you I was unaware of."
"Really? Is that what he said?" She burst into giggles. "You are too cute, Walter O'Brien. No, you haven't done anything wrong. Today. Yet. Maybe I just like spending time with you doing anything at all." She leaned over the console, pressed a kiss to his cheek and laid one hand on his thigh. She snuggled closely leaning her cheek on his shoulder effectively distracting him from his previous thoughts.
A little later she whispered in his ear, "What was the other reason?" Then she softly bit his earlobe.
Having a hard enough time concentrating on driving while Paige was fondling his leg and breathing in his ear, he couldn't come up with an answer at first. "Hmmm?" He hummed in the form of a question.
Her hand stroked up a bit farther teasing close to dangerous territory. His eyes nearly crossed and he stopped a little bit too short at a red light. "Your friend said there were two reasons you could've found yourself shopping with me," She purred and drew her tongue softly around the outside of his ear.
Walter shivered and his words came out a little squeaky. "Uh…It-it could be…for-for, um, earning p-points."
He felt Paige smile against his neck. "Earning points, huh?" She sucked lightly on the area under his earlobe and her fingertips brushed ever closer torturing him in the best possible way.
He gasped through clenched teeth just as the car behind him honked. The light had turned green several seconds before. As he cautiously inched the car forward, she continued, "You've been very sweet and patient. I think you've racked up quite a few points today. The garage is between here and home, care to stop and redeem them?"
Then and there Walter determined shopping was a phenomenal way to spend a Saturday afternoon with Paige. He filed that information away for further use as he sped toward the garage.
