"You…" Mido growled, teeth bared in an animalistic snarl. "What did you do?" he shouted, and his voice seemed to echo on and on among the giant trees of the Old Forest.

Link gawked, his jaw moving soundless as he tried to find words. He could not believe Mido would try to turn this on him. The hurt, the fury and venom in Mido's accusation seemed to preclude any chance of an easy departure, and Link could only shake his head slowly.

What was worse, Mido's companions now eyed the tallest boy with nervous gazes, conferring with each other quietly, like deer that scented a predator before the pounce. They knotted closely together, instinctively drawn to the pack, as though Link really was dangerous. The old bitter, throat constricting rejection and insecurity rose in Link's gorge again, and he let his shoulders down with a shaky sigh. Nothing would have made him happier than punching Mido in the teeth.

"Mido," Saria said, her unfriendly tone cutting through the gloom of the Old Forest. "How could this possibly be his fault?"

The Lead Hunter was lost in thought for a moment, planning his end-all diatribe, Link was sure. Curiosity peeped from under the covers in his heart. Link pushed it away, however, just wanting to leave quickly.

"You'd still defend him, even after he stole your Lore?" Mido purred to his Wisest, winningly, imploringly and Link watched Saria closely. Instead of the spark of understanding, as Mido hoped, Saria sadly shook her head. So much energy put forth to wound, to gain status in the only-too-subtle game of comparative rank, he was desperate to save face, not the well being of his fellow Children. Saria considered briefly the Bad Juju Ceremony, directed at Mido, to send him into the prison of the Lost Woods. Wasn't emotional abuse on a similar level as murder?

As they waited for Saria's answer, the cicadas began their whirring, undulating chatter, rising and falling in waves, heralding an early and long warm season. With a stomach-wrenching insight, Link wondered if the places he traveled to would house cicadas. Summer and autumn would not sound the same without them.

Finally, Saria asked, "What are the problems at camp you mentioned?"

Mido was crushed. She had not even responded to the unspeakably rude allegation. After all, what Child, fairy or no, could steal Lore? It was survival, it was free for any to learn, if they could, and Link had proven without a doubt that even with the handicap of fairylessness, he succeeded in continued existence.

"There are scrubs attacking us! The Clearing, it's overrun with the things!" cried Hido Spearheart, who avoided Mido's angry glare. He might not like the tall, elfin boy, who had a fairy but did not claim her as his partner, and he was calling that into question as well, but the Children must unite against the forces of nature if they were to live. Link was the one with a sword, and obviously the best candidate to rid the village of the nasty creatures. Mido would take his outburst personally, but Hido could stand it, if Link could. That was the least they owed the departing outcast.

With no words, Saria strode through the group, taking a self-assured lead and turned them towards the south, setting her feet on the trail to Kokiri Clearing. Mido fell in line behind her, slinking more than walking due to his shaming, his hunters behind him, and Link and Navi trailed behind the rest. Saria's pace was urgent and ground eating but none of the Children had any trouble keeping up.

"Have the rest hidden themselves? What protection did you set up for them?" Saria inquired over her shoulder as she pushed aside a low-hanging linden branch.

"We left the Knowing Brothers slinging rocks at the scrubs," Bado said quickly on his way past the branch.

"I told the girls to pull out the reserves of our skunk scent," Dedo volunteered slyly. The Wisest nodded her head approvingly. Everyone knew scrubs had an intensely sensitive olfactory system; concentrated skunk gunk would be more than a little agitating.

Mido offered no words when he passed Saria.

"What did you do to piss off the scrubs?" Navi asked bluntly as Link brushed past the branch and his friend. Link stumbled and Mido whirled around only to catch the tripping boy. A little wound up, he shoved the Fairyless back and directed curt words to the fairy bringing up the rear.

"We took a shortcut to the hunting grounds two days ago. Fairyless there went a little off-course and ended up in a den of the things." His nose wrinkled, and he smirked wickedly. The elevation of the land dipped, forming a low, wet depression that was perfect for hardy evergreens. Mido loved stripping the needles from a fringed finger as they hiked by the little copse, if only to nibble on the end of the tender twig. "He ran off, and ended up scaring the herd away, leaving us meatless for the Long Day Feast. Luckily, a couple of rabbits offered themselves to my spear," he finished grandly, tossing the stick behind him.

"Why would you send one of your hunters through the mating grounds of deku scrubs?" Navi obviously pierced the little bubble of success Mido thought surrounded him as he deflated.

"Because I didn't go off course, Mido told me to cut through the brambles and scout ahead," Link declared sourly. "The scrubs moved their home, surprise to me, and when I burst through the bushes, they scattered. One of them was bigger, and started squawking at me. I was spooked and took off in the direction I was headed in the first place. When I reached the hunting ground, I came right out into the middle of the herd, and they scattered too."

"Lucky Mido thought to spear those critters on the way there," Hido pronounced ironically. Mido blushed.

Navi chose silence instead of judgment, even if Link thought she would have a few choice words for his bully.

The next bend in the path revealed the open and almost flat Clearing where the Kokiri gathered for projects and social events. No party was being held today, though. In the place of a celebration, an odd battle was being waged. The Kokiri were ensconced behind large rocks around the outside of The Clearing, standing only to pelt rocks at their weird opponents.

Deku scrubs were proto-sapient little monkeys, but their bodies tended more towards plant in appearance, if not genetic composition. They stood no higher than Link's waist, and walked upright on two stubby legs, their arms hidden by dark, shaggy fur, into which they braided sticks and leaves and flowers, better for camouflage among the shrubs of the Middle Forest where they hid. Skin colors varied from light yellow to dusky brown, although the only skin that showed was the area around their luminous orange eyes. Above the eyes was a tuft of fur, and this was usually decorated in the same manner as their fur. The strangest feature by far was the nose: natural selection favored quivering, cylindrical trunks that protruded from beneath smooth foreheads. When searching for food, the scrubs rooted around in the dirt and underbrush for tender shoots, worms, grubs and the occasional mole. They had no visible teeth, and so, learned to use their trunks and incredible lung capacity to vacuum up prey. Unfortunately for the Kokiri, this function could be reversed in defense. With suitable, hard, round ammo, the scrubs learned to force projectiles from their trunks at any offenders.

The little army of deku scrubs was loosely ranked on the opposite side of the clearing, trunks loaded and at the ready for another target, squeaking and honking in battle-pleasure. Evolving with little use for hands, they were proud of their sharp shooting skills.

Once the six absent Children set foot into the clearing, the scrubs immediately swiveled, aiming for the new objective. Even better, the one who disturbed them in the first place!

Link observed the group carefully, noting that all two-dozen pairs of eyes were trained on him for the moment. He needed to move slowly, unthreateningly, if he didn't want to end up battered and bruised by deku nut sized pebbles. Cautiously, his hand trailed to the thong on his waist, loosening it slightly with a jiggle of his thumb and grasped his sword handle. Lightning fast now, he whipped the rabbit stole from the blade and held the weapon high, hoping to exude and assert the confidence he didn't altogether feel. That confidence waxed, however, when the scrubs jumped back in alarm, squeaking in clipped sounds, "Run! It Impaler!"

Link grinned, a little vicious, and bluffed, puffing his chest out and grunting a loud "Yahh!" at the big leader who did not move. Two scrubs, only slightly smaller than the leader, stepped up on both sides of the boss to face the Kokiri who trod into their territory. While he gave no sign of fear, Link felt his self-assurance slipping. Already, a few Children on the sidelines sported the telltale round bruises; in Varia's case, a bloody knick to the brow. But these three could do serious damage, with their wider trunks and experience, and Link was in close range for a critical concussion or worse.

If only he had something to shield himself with, Link thought nervously while he and the big scrub stared one another down, a silent contest of wills. Dominance would dictate this outcome. The big, sad eyes of the leader held nothing but animal contempt, a wrath based on perpetrated territory. Likewise, Link was sad, hoping not to have to kill the beast whom he had wronged, wishing that he would step down, but he resigned himself to taking the life of the Deku Scrub who incited injury in Link's own dojo.

Just as he screwed up the strength to jab his sword, the shifty pupils of the scrub leader strayed for a moment, and Link felt Saria easing a large swatch of tough, thick bark from a nearby redwood into his hands from behind him. Without breaking eye contact, Link gently grabbed the top edge of the irregularly shaped patch of bark, held it for a moment, trying to judge its weight and the force necessary to do what he wanted. It was instinctual more than mathematical, an ability to judge and plan and predict, that made the best Kokiri. Link steadied, waiting for the leader to puff up and Now!

The leader was scarcely building up his incredible lung pressure to expel his projectile when Link rushed forward, bashing him in the snout with the scrap of bark. Then, not waiting to see the thing fall back from the impact, he utilized the energy from the snapback of the hit to power his punch shield into the face of the scrub on the right of the big one. He felt eyes on his back and swiveled around to see the first scrub forcing the pellet from his nose into his shield, where it bounced with some vigor to a spot right between the scrub's eyes. He fell over, stunned and twitching as the leader picked himself up and shook sense into his head. Link faked another rush at the cowering scrub.

"Get out of the village!" He said authoritatively, holding up the offending shield and the unused sword. He relaxed visibly, but not with relief. Link was poised for another attack, establishing his superior firepower with the scrubby leader.

Baleful orange eyes bored into Link, but the triumph over the canny old deku scrub cowed him sufficiently. The boy who disturbed them took out his numbers two and three to his one in less time than it took to blink. They were unaccustomed to the pain of defeat, usually being the ones to inflict contusions. There was no purpose left for him in this village of savages. He turned, nudging the unconscious scrubs on the ground, waiting as they roused and then as soon as the two wobbled to their feet, he yapped crossly at them while they followed the trail of their brothers and sisters.


A/N:

I'm all for a realistic portrayal of everything in Zelda. There comes a point, though, that realism does not apply to the game, and fundamental ideas suffer for accurate depiction. The Temple of Time is no monotheistic, patriarchal cathedral made of gold, nor is the Triforce gained at the end of OoT. The legends of Zelda where Link is a knight or a city boy who gets close to her, or even a rube that moves into the city from the outskirts don't interest me. On the other end of the spectrum are the stories where everything is a literal translation of gameplay, and everyone has already read the walkthrough. Or worse, the crappy, crack-tastic scripts that every new fanfictionist feels the need to write. (It's okay, I wrote one too, once. Then I burned the computer upon which it was spawned.) The closest adaptations still have too much deviation: extra characters that don't do much aside from showcase an array of hair colors, more towns and provinces than you could shake a stick at, and pointless twists in canon, like Link having a twin sister.

Here is a story where most of the details in the game are represented, but perhaps in a slightly modified manner. Even though there is no dungeon inside the Deku Tree, Link still must have courage to stand so close to the Guardian of the Forest among his roots.

I think adamwestslapdog says it best: "Fire? But you're in a tree! A tree made of wood! Use your head for a minute." Burning cobwebs, indeed.