Chapter 9
Alec POV
"You gotta calm down, man." Oliver warned from across the table as I sat clenching and unclenching my fists. He picked up his drink and threw it back, draining the last remaining sip left within. "If she's with Dimitri then I'm sure she's fine."
"Do any of you even really know him?" I asked incredulously. "He could be an ax murderer for all you know."
"Honestly…he's a pretty cool guy, Alec. And he's making my little sister happy – happier than I've seen her in a while anyway." Logan's words were like a punch to the gut, and he shrugged half-heartedly like he was only mildly sorry for his words. I knew they hadn't fully forgiven me for what transpired between Belle and I, and Logan had as good a reason as any to never forgive me again. He'd trusted me with his little sister and I'd shattered that trust completely.
"I don't trust him." I bit out. The memory of the night I'd run into him in the café had been playing on repeat in my head for weeks. I couldn't say anything about it to them of course. They would think I was just playing it up or creating a reason for them to doubt him. I didn't have any concrete proof of the shady dealings I believed he was involved in. Not yet.
Harlow scoffed at my comment. "Well, you're the one that just sent her into a full-blown panic attack during her only night out in weeks, Al." She shook her head and swirled a straw around in her drink. Harlow never minced her words with me. She was as brutal as she wanted to be – and other than Belle – she was the only person who could really talk to me that way. "You're the last person she needs to be around right now."
I slammed my drink down on the tabletop and stood. "Whatever, I'm getting out of here."
"Don't you dare go by the house." Harlow warned. "I don't want a repeat of what happened the last time you decided to do that. You just keep digging the hole deeper."
"Thanks sis." I deadpanned while rolling my eyes and walking away. I knew I'd fucked things up pretty good, but how was I ever supposed to fix them if I couldn't even talk to her? And the worst part was I just couldn't seem to control my words around her. I didn't know how to deal with things like this. When the girls I took out got pissed at me I typically just moved on. I didn't bother going back to try and repair things because I didn't see a point in it. Because they weren't Belle.
When she'd run into me tonight I thought we'd have a chance to talk about things. But the way she'd looked at me…I couldn't begin to chip away at her icy exterior. It was like looking at a wall when our eyes met. She'd completely blocked me out and I couldn't get past the surface. Not to mention our momentary close proximity had sent me reeling at first. It took me a few seconds to realize that I wasn't seeing things, and by the time I'd recovered it had been too late.
I shouldn't have grabbed her. I knew I shouldn't have done that, but she'd turned to leave so quickly that I just wanted a chance. The way she'd recoiled from my touch…she should have just slapped me in the face instead – that would have been less painful. And as soon as I'd gotten a chance to get a word in I jumbled it up in typical Alec fashion.
She didn't deserve the condescending comments I made, but I couldn't stop them. I didn't want to hurt her feelings, but there was no way I could even attempt to be honest with my own and expect her to receive them. Not with how things were now. She wouldn't hear me.
When I noticed her panic attack starting, I thought maybe I'd have a chance. I'd swoop in and save her and calm her down like I had every other time before – and then maybe we could have a civilized conversation. She'd have seen that I still cared, and she'd have been more open to my words. Even then I knew it was selfish. It was so fucking selfish to hope and manipulate that situation to my benefit, especially when I was the cause of her stress. I couldn't help it.
But of course he was there.
He knew something about what had happened between us. He had to. In the moment I was so surprised she'd said anything about me at all to him that I was overwhelmed with shock. And shame. The amount of shame that had coursed through my body as he stared me down was unlike anything I'd never felt before. He was looking down on me, and there was nothing I could say to refute his words.
I contemplated driving by her house. Just to see. Just to see if he was still there. But I'd had just about all the self-inflicted pain I could take for one day.
My mind drifted back to the confrontation at the café, and still I couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that had remained pitted in my stomach ever since. Dimitri Volkov… I knew I'd heard that last name somewhere before, but I couldn't quite place it.
My eyes danced back and forth in front of the bright computer screen just looking for any shred of information that could make it all make sense. But there was none. I tried a multitude of different search combinations, but the search engine gave up nothing. "Dammit." My fist bit into the top of the desk creating a sick sort of crack, and a sharp pain shot through my hand and caused me to suck in a breath.
How could there be nothing? Even a direct name search had returned minimal results. No online profiles. No social media. Normal people would at least have a few hits. Who the fuck is this guy? My eyes drifted down to the badge and gun laying on the desk, and I had to physically shake the idea out of my head. In the scheme of all things I was still fairly new to the force. Only a couple of months in – and I still hadn't seen any action yet. I was a glorified paper pusher at this point. I couldn't abuse my power for a selfish search on the random dude Belle was hooking up with; however tempting it was.
I closed the laptop and let my fingers tips drum several times on the desk in thought. There had to be a better way to go about this. If Belle really was in danger like I believed her to be with this guy I had to work faster.
I had to.
Belle POV
"Are you feeling any better?" Dimitri's words were laced with concern. I tried my best to respond with a slight nod of my head – finding words was still proving to be a bit difficult. And what would I even tell him? That the sight of Alec – the feeling of his hands on me – had sent me into a full-blown panic attack?
My hands trembled slightly as I raised a glass of water to my lips and took a small sip. My thoughts felt like they were both whirring by at warp speed and completely absent at the same time. I couldn't focus on any singular thing, and yet I couldn't help but to see everything clearly.
A warm hand pressed itself against my lower back and my eyes drifted over to where Dimitri sat next to me on the couch. "Do you want to talk about it?" he questioned cautiously – his tone gentle. I couldn't talk about this with him. That much I knew. I'd ran into Alec dozens of times over the last few months and not once had I had this kind of reaction to his presence. I couldn't explain to him something I couldn't understand myself.
My mind wandered back to the feeling of my face against Alec's warm chest – his hand burning into the skin on my wrist – and I was pummeled with memories of our night together. Too close. He had been too close for my liking; for my sanity. I couldn't think with him that close to me. The idea of Alec, and any thoughts of Alec, needed to remain in a tiny box in the back of my mind. That was the only way I could mentally handle him. Filed and packed away into the deepest recesses until the hurt was replaced by a more manageable numb feeling.
Dimitri traced calming circles on my back, and though my breathes were coming easier now, I still couldn't bring myself to form coherent sentences. "Dyshi, lyubov' moya." Dimitri breathed in thick throaty Russian, and I melted a little.
"What did you say?" my voice came out weak. So small that I thought for a moment that he hadn't heard me. When I turned to meet his gaze his electric blue eyes softly bored into my own.
"Just reminding you to breathe." His lips pulled up into a half-hearted lopsided smile and I felt myself melting all over again.
"You're too good to me."
"Me? Good?" he laughed softly. "Tol'ko dlya tebya, moya lyubov'" he gathered my hand in his own and brought it up to his lips, placing a small kiss on it.
"There you go again. Any chance you could translate for me?"
He had a mischievous glint in his eyes as he shook his head back and forth. "Not this time. That one will have to stay my little secret." It was gradual, but somehow Dimitri had succeeded in pulling me out of that dark abyss I'd been suffocating in.
His eyes searched mine tentatively, almost like he was checking to see if the fog had lifted yet or not. I offered him a small reassuring smile in return.
"Thank you, Dimitri." He nodded in response. His mouth parted slightly, like he wanted to ask something, but he clammed his lips closed and smiled back at me.
"I would come to your rescue anytime." His phone made a beeping sound, and I watched as he pulled it from his pocket and let his eyes drift over the screen. Something flashed behind his eyes and his expression changed slightly. He ran a hand over the stubble on his face and shook his head in annoyance.
"Is something wrong?" I asked softly as he typed out a response and slipped the phone back into his pocket.
"No. Nothing's wrong, love. Just a work issue that requires my attention." He stood up and placed a gentle kiss on the top of my head. "It shouldn't take me too long to resolve. If you'd like I can come back after."
I thought on his words for a moment. My eyes drifted to the clock on the wall and I balked at the time. Where had the hours gone? It was nearly midnight. Everyone else must still be enjoying their night out. "As much as I would like that I think I should turn in for the night." He nodded and placed a soft kiss on my lips.
"I'll text you later on, okay?"
"Sounds good."
I watched as he pulled his jacket on and made for the door. He turned around one final time to shoot a smile in my direction, and then he was gone.
Sorry for the late upload guys! It's been a crazy week.
I hope you enjoy the twists in this update and stay tuned for the impending drama!
Thanks for reading,
Poetic. x3
