"Fuck you."

I pushed past Dimitri, leaving him standing in the entryway to the gym. There were so many other things that I had wanted to say to him, but my anger took precedence. I didn't look back as I walked away from the gym, no matter how much I wanted to. I wanted Dimitri to come after me, to have an explanation for the radio silence of the last two days, to show me he loved me, but he didn't follow me.

Lissa had asked me to come over to her dorm after training, but I couldn't bring myself to go there. I was barely holding it together walking back to the dhampir dorm. As I entered my building, I pulled out my phone to text Lissa and let her know that I wasn't coming. Her answer was immediate.

Lissa (3:46): What happened? Dimitri?

Rose (3:46): I don't want to talk about it.

I shoved my phone back into my pocket before Lissa could respond. I didn't need her pity right now.

"Rose!"

I glanced up to see Eddie walking toward me.

"Hi, Eddie," I said.

"Are you coming to dinner?" he questioned, pausing when he reached me in the lobby.

"I'm actually meeting up with Lissa soon," I said. "Sorry."

He smiled. "No problem. See you later!"

Eddie walked out of the dorm building while I made my way to my bedroom. Once in my room, I crawled under the covers of my bed and tried to fight the tears that were threatening to spill.

My attempts were futile. I hadn't cried in so long, and yet Dimitri could make me cry in an instant, and I hated it. But that didn't stop me from loving him.

Once my sobs had subsided to sniffles, I rolled over in my bed, reaching in my nightstand drawer for the bottle of muscle relaxers that were leftover from my last injury from class. I pulled one out of the bottle and quickly swallowed it down, desperately wanting to sleep and forget everything for a while.

I didn't know what time I fell asleep, but when I woke up, my bedside clock told me it was eleven. My curtains blocked out most of the sunlight, but I could see some of it leaking around the edges. I quickly grabbed a change of clothes, quietly stepped out into the hallway, and walked toward the bathroom.

Fifteen minutes later, I walked out of the bathroom with a towel on my head. I was wearing the blue sweatshirt that Dimitri had given me back in November after the lust charm had taken control of us. The Cyrillic writing on it was still undecipherable to me, but wearing the sweatshirt still brought me comfort, even though I was pissed at Dimitri.

I was almost back to my room when the doors at the end of the hall swung open, and Dimitri walked through. Part of me wished I could bolt for my room, but Dimitri was too close to it, and he had already seen me.

"Rose," he greeted. "What are you doing out of bed?"

I glared at him. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm doing my rounds," he said. "I'm on duty."

"Of course," I said bitterly. "Don't let me stop you."

I made to move past him, but Dimitri quickly grabbed me by the arm, stopping me. It felt like déjà vu as I quickly jerked my arm from his grip. Just like before, he could have held me all night if he wanted to.

"Roza—"

"Don't call me that," I snarled. "Good night."

Again, I turned towards my room. This time, Dimitri didn't stop me. But I didn't have to turn around to know he was following me.

I didn't stop Dimitri as he followed me to my door, and neither of us spoke until I opened the door.

"May I come in?" Dimitri asked softly. "We need to talk."

Part of me wanted to say no, but the other part of me was desperate for an explanation, and that part won out. I held the door open silently as I stepped into the room, and Dimitri quietly shut the door behind me. I quickly crossed the room to sit on my bed while Dimitri stood near my desk.

"Rose, what happened the other night was—"

"If your next words are that it was a mistake, then you can turn around and leave," I interrupted him. "I already figured that out for myself."

Dimitri stared at me. "A mistake? No. Why would you think that?"

"What else am I supposed to be thinking right now?" I asked with a sigh. "You switched around our training times so that Emil was training me and didn't tell me. You didn't answer the door when I was outside of it begging for answers. You didn't fo—"

I cut off before I could reveal how hurt I was by earlier today. As it was, I could already feel tears forming in my eyes and looked away so that Dimitri wouldn't notice.

"I don't think what we did was a mistake," Dimitri said quietly. "In fact, I think it was the exact opposite. Everything since has been a mess that spiraled quickly out of control, and I want to be able to explain it to you."

"Then explain," I snapped, ignoring his earlier words despite the fluttering I felt when he had spoken them.

"You already know that Alberta knows about us," he said. "They'll kick you out of the Academy if Kirova finds out, if anyone else finds out. Changing my training with you, picking up extra shifts, it was all to keep Alberta's attention off of us.

"I wasn't in my room the other day when you were knocking," he said softly. "Alberta mentioned it yesterday; she wanted to know why you were banging on the door."

"Lissa told her it was a spirit darkness episode," I said softly. "Lissa was here with me when you weren't."

"I'm sorry," he said. "I was planning on talking to you after Stan's class, but you never showed up."

I stood from the bed and faced him. "What do you want me to say, Dimitri? There were other ways of contacting me besides pulling me out of a class! Do you know what the past couple of days have been like for me?"

"I'm sorry," Dimitri repeated. "I just wanted to protect you, and in doing that, I overlooked everything else that I should have been doing. I couldn't bear the thought of the Academy finding out, of them kicking you out. You wouldn't be able to become a guardian, and I couldn't have let that be my fault."

"I don't care!" I nearly shouted the words before remembering that though my hallway was mostly empty due to the lack of female novices, it wasn't entirely empty. "I don't need a promise mark to guard Lissa. I don't care if they shipped me off because they would've done the same to you, and we could've been together. I. Wanted. You."

Dimitri walked towards me until he was a step away, and I didn't back away. Slowly, he reached out and caught a lock of my hair between his fingers. My breath caught, and my traitorous heart raced at the simple movement. I was still angry at him, dammit.

"I'm sorrier than I can say. I've wanted nothing more than to have you in my arms again, holding you," Dimitri said. "Please forgive me."

He wasn't playing fair, and we both knew it, but I still stepped closer to him.

"I've made you cry," he whispered, noting my still bloodshot eyes. "Never again."

"Shut up and kiss me," I whispered.

Ever so slightly, I tilted my head up and brushed my lips against him. His hands tangled themselves in my hair as my arms found their way around his neck. He deepened the kiss, sucking slightly on my bottom lips. I moaned softly.

Reluctantly, Dimitri pulled away. "I need to finish my rounds. But I'll be back. Leave the door unlocked."

He pressed his lips to mine again before pulling away and walking out the door.


I woke sometime later as the door closed with a soft click. I heard the footsteps cross the floor before the bed dipped under Dimitri's weight. He laid down beside me and pulled me against him. He pressed a soft kiss to my neck.

"Go back to sleep," he murmured.

"What time is it?" I whispered back, leaning into Dimitri's embrace.

"Just after three," he said. "Still time before you have to get up."

I nodded and let the comfort of Dimitri's embrace and the smell of his aftershave lull me back to sleep.


When my alarm went off three hours later, Dimitri's arms were still wrapped around me. I leaned over to shut off the alarm and stretched back out in the bed.

"Don't you have to get up?" Dimitri mumbled.

"It's my training alarm," I said. "Forgot to change it."

Dimitri opened his eyes and glanced at the alarm. It was six-thirty. He shifted in the bed and shot me a grin.

"Since you have time then," he started, "let me show you how sorry I am for the past couple of days."

Dimitri quickly moved so that he was straddling my hips and looked down at me. I squirmed under his gaze. He leaned down and kissed me gently, lovingly. He pulled back for a moment and looked like he was about to say something. Before he could, I grabbed him around his neck and brought his lips back to mine. Dimitri shifted so that he was straddling me lower, and I felt his hands barely brush against my thighs. A moment later, I felt him pushing the edge of the sweatshirt up.

I broke our kiss as a moan left my mouth, my body on fire from the barest of his touches. Dimitri slowly started trailing kisses along my jaw and to my neck. He shifted again so that he was kneeling in between my legs now. He alternated between kissing and sucking at the skin on my neck, and I arched my back, my hips now pressing against the clear bulge in his pants. Dimitri broke the kiss and sat up. Before I could process the change, Dimitri's hands were moving up and cupping my breasts over the sweatshirt. Shockwaves ran through me as he pinched my nipples, the drag of the fabric of the sweatshirt only heightening the sensations.

"Dimitri, please."

Dimitri's eyes were dark with lust when he looked at me. "What do you need, Roza?"

"I need you."

"You have me," he whispered.

Dimitri trailed his hands down my sides, reaching the hem of the sweatshirt again and pushing it further upwards. His finger traced the edge of my underwear, and he looked up at me with a wicked grin.

"I want to taste you, Roza," he said softly, moving even lower so that his head was in the perfect position.

I moaned and spread my legs wider. "Please," I begged.

I felt Dimitri's fingers tear through the fabric of my underwear, and the next moment, his mouth was on me. My hips jerked up at the first feel of his mouth on me as his tongue ran along my slit. It didn't take Dimitri long to find my clit, and he lightly bit down on it before sucking it into his mouth.

One hand was tangled in Dimitri's hair while the other covered my mouth, mostly silencing my cries. Dimitri continued his assault on me, his tongue now spearing inside of me. His fingers quickly joined his tongue, and I felt my walls clench down at the new intrusion. My hips were moving in tandem with his fingers and his mouth, my back nearly permanently arched. I was a mess, falling apart on his tongue and fingers.

Moans continuously spilled from my mouth, mixed with cries of Dimitri's name, all covered by my hands pressing tight against my mouth. Dimitri continued to finger me while his mouth moved back to lavish my clit. My walls clamped down as spasms rocked my body, and pleasure rushed through my body. Dimitri worked me through my orgasm gently before pulling away. He kneeled up again and kissed his way up my body before reaching my mouth. I could taste myself on his tongue and groaned.

Dimitri broke the kiss and pulled back so that his face was only a few inches from mine. "You taste so good," he whispered.

I felt my face flush at his words, and I squirmed a little. I could feel his erection pushing into me, and I moved my hands lower to release his hard dick, but Dimitri stopped me before I could.

"Don't worry about me," he said. "This was for you." He gestured to the alarm clock. "And we don't have time for anything that wouldn't make you late for class."

I followed his motions to the alarm clock, surprised to see that it was just after seven. Dimitri was right. I needed to get up and shower so that I would be on time for class.

"You could always join me in the shower," I said, giving him a seductive look.

Dimitri's face conveyed that he very much wanted to do that. "That would make for a very dirty shower, one we also don't have time for."

I pouted, and Dimitri laughed.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he whispered. "I'm on shift again tonight, but I'm off tomorrow. Maybe I can convince Alberta to let me accompany you on the Missoula trip this weekend."

That reminded me. "Oh, Lissa knows about us, by the way."

Dimitri didn't look surprised. "I figured she would, especially after the last couple of days." His face turned remorseful again. "I really am sorry."

I smiled. "I think you've more than proven how sorry you are."

Dimitri smiled at that. "Go shower," he ordered. "I'll see you later."

When I got out of the shower, Dimitri was gone, but the scent of his aftershave still lingered.