This was my loss.
This was my end.
I could not force Caster to pay for my failures.
It wasn't right.
It wasn't… fair…
Caster's eyes demanded I act, however.
"Al-Alright... I'll use them..."
Caster closed his eyes, and I had no idea what I should do. It wasn't my place to order someone like him around. But I had to order him in some way to use the command spells, didn't I? So then… then…
Then, as agreed upon at the beginning, do what you truly desire, Caster. Don't take my burdens for me.
"C-Caster, by my second command spell, I order you: find your victory condition."
The command spells, something I hadn't bothered to look at in so long… only the two wings remained. One angelic. One demonic. Which one would fade first, I wonder?
The back of my hand began to glow with a red light. A moment passed, and the demonic wing faded away, joining the central void.
And I felt a sense of… relief…
I was not a good person. Am not a good person. I always knew. I always knew. But this… at least I can go out on a good act.
Such was the significance I drew from something that, for all I knew, meant absolutely nothing.
Closing my eyes, knowing full well what I was about to say was a death wish, I spoke my final words.
"Caster, by my final command spell, I order you: achieve your victory, however you deem fit."
The silence shattered, giving way to the sound of the air being cut. Metal clashing with metal. A sickening squish. A grunt of pain. It all happened in a singular instance.
…So how was it that, come the second instance, I still felt… alive?
I opened my eyes, and drank in the lie the world was trying to show me.
Rider hadn't moved from his spot. The priest looked set to explode with anger. On the ground in front of me lay the hilts of three black keys, alongside three daggers that I'd only ever seen from the assassins under Rider's command.
And Caster was down on one knee… with his own sword through his chest…
…What…?
"Of all the way to go, this far from earns my recommendation" Caster grunted.
"Caster… w-why…"
Even as my mind failed to comprehend what I was seeing, I felt the tears begin to return all the same.
"Listen and listen well, child, as I only have the time to say this once. You have the potential to do amazing things. Break down the walls you've built, free yourself from your own lies, and do what I know you are capable of."
"B-But Caster… I… I…"
"Do you think I'm wrong in my judgement, master?"
"Wha- No! Of course not, but I'm… I-" I struggled to even form words as I shuffled over and knelt down beside Caster, unable to look him in the eyes.
"You can. …And when, not if, but when… When you make it to the throne, come find me."
"…You… You want me to… to-"
"I'm sure you'll still have plenty to learn, and I need someone to control my army. Can you think of someone better suited?"
"Caster!"
I couldn't stop myself. I wrapped my arms around him, and cried.
"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…"
The world wasn't showing me a lie. It was showing me the truth. I knew that, because only the truth could ever hurt like this. Ever did hurt like this.
"Haa" I heard Caster sigh. "I suppose I'll allow it, just this once."
The very next moment though, I could have sworn I heard him laugh, ever so slightly, to himself.
"To think that someone would mourn my passing, even if it is the second time… Looks like I win, Athena."
With a shower of golden light, silence returned to the forest.
Caster… was gone…
"…Thank you, Caster. For everything…"
Gone… because of me…
Gone… for me…
"So, child, you have your life. What will you do now?"
Faintly, I registered the voice of Rider. Slowly rising as I wiped away the tears, I turned to face him.
"Hard to say…" I admitted. "I… I know what I want to do. Need to do, as a first step… But it's… It's not entirely up to me, if that makes… sense…"
"…I believe I understand" Rider nodded.
"…"
"…"
"…So, that's it, then...? I'm… I'm actually free to just… go?"
"I made an agreement with Caster. He kept to his word, and thus, so shall I."
"R-Right then… It… It was an honor meeting you, Rider" I bowed slightly, feeling as though it was necessary, before I turned and began to walk away.
Truly, I don't think I could really explain anything at the moment. Everything I was doing was like… like simply going through motions. It still all felt… surreal…
"Caster has high expectations for you, child" I heard Rider call out, causing me to stop. "I pray for your success in meeting them."
When you make it to the throne, come find me...
"…Rider?"
"Yes, child?"
"…I… I will always stand in opposition to God. If God is real… humanity must be free from his influence. This I know to be genuine. This… I will always believe."
"…"
"But… a God that can create a man like you… That is a God I can at least… respect…"
Not a single word more was spoken as I began walking, slowly disappearing into the forest. Though, in this case, more words were perhaps not needed. Liking was out of the question. Respecting was unlikely to the point of nigh impossibility. But both of those were ok. Our end was not one of like or respect.
In that final moment, I felt as though we had achieved our end.
Understanding.
A/N
A year ago today, I released the first chapter of this story. I never expected something like this. I thought for sure this project would be a small one; 3-4 months at the very most. Yet here we are, a whole year later, and while the story is nearing the end, it's likely a good 2-3 months away, knowing me xD
All I have to say, really, is thank you. I never thought I'd actually be writing a whole year later. I didn't expect the amount of attention this story has received. So, to everyone who has made it this far, love it or hate it, praise me as a genius or curse my name for creating the biggest trash pile they've ever seen, genuinely...
Thank you.
