Hi everyone.

Thank you all for your reviews and all the love. They always brighten my days and push me to give the best I have. There will never be enough words to let you know how much they mean to me.

So, no more babbling, and here is Chapter 5!

Happy reading,

Love,

A.


Midnight talk

Their tongues were tangled, tasting fiercely, discovering the insides of their mouths. She could feel his stubble gracing her chin, his hands on her backside pressing her body more closely to him while he cornered her against the wall. She snaked her hands to his nape and started grasping his curls and pressing his face, his whole body more against her too. She was feeling aroused, hot, full of desire, she needed to feel him closer than this, as humanly possible as it could be. He was kissing her fiercely, with a hunger held for a long time now. He felt her moan and his heart grew warmer. They both had to come back for air and he pressed his forehead to hers, and they stood there for a minute, their eyes closed, their noses touching, breathing each other back to life. Her hands in his curls, his hands on her hips.

"If you wait for me I'll make everything right so we can be together. Just...say you'll wait for me... please," he whispered almost in her lips.

She was taken aback for the pleading in his words and realized that was all she ever wanted to hear from him. That he would take care of his complicated life so they could be together. Even if she said no in this moment, she knew her heart would wait for him, so she whispered a soft yes and slowly opened her eyes to find a pair of cerulean begging orbs filled with love staring back at her.

Michone snapped her eyes open and sat up in bed breathless. It was so dark in her room that she felt disoriented for a moment. She stood there for a couple of minutes, her mouth dry, trying to compose her breathing and to think about what she had just dreamed of. It was definitely about Rick. She still could feel his hands, his smell, and she rubbed her lips to hold onto the sensation of the kiss. It was a very good kiss, even if it was only a dream. Her body felt warm. Michonne dragged both hands through her face and sighed. God, I really need this break. This is getting ridiculous.

She stretched her hand to reach for her phone and checked the time. It was already past midnight. She had slept for a good amount of time and she was thankful that her migraine was mostly gone. Of course, she had missed calls and messages. One was from her mom, checking on her and confirming she was arriving the next day. She typed a reply letting her know that she was feeling much better and quickly checked the rest of them. Her sister, Kale, one from Mike (duh), three from Sasha and one from Rick. She wondered if that meant they had returned.

Michonne got up and went to the bathroom. When she climbed back in bed, she decided to let everyone know she was fine now. She texted confirmation for Kale and for her sister she said she was feeling much better. Mike's message was just a polite one asking how everything was and letting her know he would be in LA for the week before heading to New York. Maybe they could meet up for lunch. She agreed but she told him she will let him know when because her schedule was a bit tight already. To Sasha and Rick it was a fast:

Thanks for checking on me. I'm feeling much better. See you tomorrow.

She added a kiss emoji for Sasha and sent both messages. She was pulling the covers back again when her phone buzzed.

Ok girl. Rest. Do you need anything? We just got here.

Nope. I'm going back to bed. Thx. Luv y.

Sasha sent heart emojis and a picture of her and Daryl blowing a kiss to the camera. Michonne was giggling at the pic when she noticed Rick's reply.

Good to know.

How was it? Did you have fun for me?

It was good. Missed you though.

She stared at the message for a few seconds. Don't read too much into it, Michonne.

Sorry.

Are you up for some talk now?

You realize it's past midnight right?

I know, but you owe me for leaving me to go alone to that bar. She chuckled. Of course, he would try to get even somehow. Plus, you'll be free of me for the next couple of months.

I'm pretty sure I will not. And you were definitely not alone.

True. But you still owe me.

Michonne thought for a moment before answering. Something was bothering him since she last saw him and maybe he just wanted to get it off his chest. They were good friends after all. Her not being able to go out last night reduced the time range of them talking like that before going back home and she somehow felt it in her heart. She checked the time again. There was time for them to catch up and still get some rest before hell broke loose in the morning. It's not like they were not both night owls.

I guess I do.

Be there in 10.

Once she hit send and saw his reply she got instantly nervous. Shit. Her mind took her back to that dream and suddenly she was too aware of her looks and went to check herself in the bathroom mirror. This was Rick, her best friend, why was she feeling so stupidly out of sorts? It is not as if they were going to have a late date? She took a deep breath to calm her nerves. Why couldn't she control the butterflies like a schoolgirl with a silly crush? Damn it, Michonne. Just breathe. She turned on both bedside lamps, she didn't want all the lights on to avoid her migraine making a comeback. It was under control now. She saw all her luggage packed in a corner of the room. Everything was ready for her to fly. She decided to do a last time check of all the things she might need to get ready in the morning.

Rick had been lying in bed since they got back and had only called home to check on the kids. At least Lori didn't give him a hard time because it was late and passed the phone to Carl since Judith was already asleep. Carl was about to go on break from school so he thought that probably was still awake. It was always nice to hear his son's voice. When he passed the phone back to Lori, she got confirmation of the time he was arriving and they both disconnected the call with a see you soon. Since his conversation with Daryl earlier he had been trying to think about the hints in his marriage. Sure it looked like they were the perfect family from outside, but those tender moments between them two were long gone. Lori was a good mother but Rick realized that she was no longer the woman he'd married and fell in love with all those years ago. He'd felt the changes but Daryl's words helped him see clearer and without the guilt he'd been feeling lately about her feelings for another woman that was not his wife. He definitely didn't want to feel like that anymore and decided it was about time for him to stop trying to live the rest of his life in a miserable union. He knew there was going to be a fight about that. But right now all he needed was someone to talk to.

He lightly knocked on Michonne's door and once opened she allowed him to move inside and closed the door. He noticed all her things packed away neatly. Rick gave her a look trying to get confirmation that she was indeed feeling better but she dismissed him with a wave and went to sit on the side of her bed and pressed her back to her pillows, one foot folded under her, the other on the floor. He followed and sat next to her.

"I'm fine, Grimes. Stop looking at me like that".

"Ok."

"Did you end up paying for how many drinks?" He chortled slightly.

"None actually, but I wouldn't have minded. So, what are you planning to do during this time? Beach right?"

"Oh, yes. I can't wait. The first thing I'll do will be that. I can smell the beach now," they sniggered. "But I might not have as much time as I'd like. I still have some work to do in LA. Plus, there is this family gathering, that play I really need to finish writing and the organization for the girls. I promised I was going to visit once I finished filming."

"Yeah, you'll be busy."

"What about you? Are you guys going to travel anywhere?"

Rick just stared at his hands in silence for a moment. Michonne noticed it was the same mood he had when she asked about him going back home earlier.

"Rick, what is it?"

"Hmm, no. I don't think Lori planned anything. I really don't know." He didn't look at her.

"What do you mean? By this time you always know where you guys are going and you always go somewhere. It's all Carl tells me about when we meet at CC."

"Yeah, but I think we won't this time."

"Is something wrong?" She looked at him with big brown eyes full of anxiety and a frown. He stood up and paced a little bit. Should I just dive in? No stupid asshole! Listen to Daryl. Her voice brought him back. "Rick, I know something is wrong with you, is it at home? Both times I've mentioned that you go into that weird mood. Do you wanna talk about it?"

Her voice was soft but with concern now. She had seen him worried about things before but not about his family or things at home.

Oh, fuck it all.

He went to sit next to her again and rest his elbows in his knees. That itch in his brow appeared again. Every single time he was worried about something to say he would do that. He wasn't sure about what he was gonna say but he needed to let it out. Michonne was also his best friend after all.

"Things are not going very well at home."

"Is it the kids?" She furrowed her brows. "Is Carl giving you guys trouble? Not that I am an expert or anything but I know teenagers can be…"

"It is not them." He took a deep breath. "Things are not going well... between Lori and me."

"Wait, what?" He just nodded. "I mean, you told me that you were going through this phase in your marriage but I thought everything was fine now. It certainly looked fine." Michonne remembered the last CC when Lori was there. She wouldn't leave Rick's side and acted all caring and in love. Michonne saw right through her and her little act for the media but it was definitely not her business and she was happy for Rick since that meant that things had improved between them. Apparently not.

"I wish. It just gets worse and worse. And I am just thinking about Carl and Judith and how they are in the middle of it all."

"Rick, but is it that bad?" She certainly never thought it was this bad. True, his marriage was not the main topic of their conversations because she was not a fan of Lori, something he was well aware of, and she could tell the same thing about his wife's feelings for her. They just tolerated each other and were polite.

"Like I said I wish it weren't. But I know that eventually, I have to do something about it."

"Do what? Are you thinking about going to therapy?" She heard him scoff and shook his head." Ok, if not therapy… then what?"

"I'll ask her for the divorce," he blurted and she gasped loudly while covering her mouth with one of her hands.

"Rick…"

"I can't do it anymore, Michonne."

Oh, shit.

"Rick, don't you think that's a bit extreme?"

"Maybe, maybe not."

"You both should really talk this out very carefully. Don't go there until all options..." he cut her short with a wave of his hand.

"And I will. As soon as I have time when I get home. It might sound extreme but this is the right thang to do. We haven't been in a good place for a while. Honestly, I never thought I would divorce her, the mother of my children. I know she is difficult but I never doubted that she loved me or the kids."

"Then why?"

"For the longest time I thought that was enough, that that was love, and having that it was all I could ask of life: my kids, my career, her. But I realized I can have more, that I deserve more. I realized that I don't want to go back to a house plagued with complaints instead of support and love or that she looked at me with a bit of resentment because I am not leaving my job just to please her."

"Wait. She wants you to leave the show?" When he nodded Michonne just rolled her eyes. Typical. "And then what? Are you going to keep acting or finally become a cheesemaker? What would make her happy?"

At this point, Rick almost laughed despite the seriousness of the situation. He knew Michonne was being sarcastic because she always believed he was one of the best people and actors she has ever met. She made sure to tell him and others whenever she had the chance.

"That's the point, if that were the case I might think of doing it but it's not. She claims he wants me at home, to spend more time with her and Judith and Carl but if I do it I am sure she will find another excuse to come at me. I won't stop acting because that's what she wants. I love my job."

"So, she wants you by her side. Doesn't sound so bad when you look at it that way, I mean, she is your wife, her wanting to spend more time with you is not totally irrational…", she was giving her the benefit of the doubt. Michonne closed her mouth shut when Rick stared at her.

"That's not why she's asking this. The truth is she never believed the show would ever be this successful. Give it two or three seasons and I'll be back at home with a new project, that's what she thought. She resents me for all of this. For the things I've missed while filming, traveling as if I don't miss my kids while I am here or I don't give them all of my time when I am with them."

"I know how much you love them, Rick." She paused before going deep into what he had just said. Rick was back to stare at his hands. "So... Do you really think your success bothers her? That would be childish to say the least."

"I've come to think of it sometimes, I mean, she is my wife for Christ's sake, I shouldn't even think that of her but the way she acts sometimes… and all I do when I get home is being at home. I try to be the best father and husband but she would still find something to pick a fight and… I just can't deal with her anymore."

There was a moment of silence between them. Michonne was not sure what to think of it anymore either, especially with that dream still in the back of her mind. Wait for me? What was that shit about? Wait for him to get a divorce? She touched her temples and licked her lips. She didn't contemplate this midnight talk would go this intense.

"So, what? Just like that. You are going to divorce her? You need to solve whatever is going on."

"I've tried, Michonne. That is all I do every time I go home and I'm sick of it already."

"You don't love her? Is that it?"

There was that irritating question again. And that was his chance. Being especially chatty was not his strong suit but he was going to start putting things in place. This was the first one.

"I guess I don't," he shrugged and looked at her. "Listen. I know what I feel, what I've been feeling lately. Me and Lori, we've been together for more than 15 years now. My feelings for her have changed, damn I am pretty sure her feelings for me have changed as well and I felt that I just didn't want to acknowledge it. Neither of us. I don't know her reasons but I know mine. Following the status pro quo was easier, but I realized that I can't keep pretending I'm happy and in love with her anymore."

"Oh, Rick…" Michonne felt sad for her friend but hot and nervous all of the sudden; he was here in her room admitting that he didn't love his wife anymore and that he was going to get a divorce. She held to his shoulder and squeezed lightly. Divorce was always sad for her, two people that vowed to love each other for better or worse, in sickness and health now broken. The kids. She knew Rick, he believed in marriage as an institution too, and for him making this kind of decision meant that things have really gotten bad.

"But there is also something else." Her stomach jumped when he took her hand from his shoulder and pierced her with his blue eyes. She just stared at him blankly and Rick took his time to continue which irritated her a bit.

"You gonna tell me or should I guess?"

"I think I'm in love with you, Michonne." Her heart skipped a beat and he saw her eyes open in surprise for a beat and then pooled with water and she looked down. "I think I have been for quite some time now".

Damn it not now, Rick.

"Rick… what are you doing?" Her voice sounded like a whisperer when she met his eyes again. Her face was a mix of sadness and joy but her heart was beating too fast for her liking.

"Getting my things together. Trying to find a way. Somehow along the way I fell in love with you, it's not hard to do that. You are an amazing, classy, talented, gorgeous woman, Michonne. I don't know when it happened but it did. I certainly didn't plan it. Me telling you this doesn't mean you need to give me any kind of answer. I'm not asking for anything in return, I don't have the right to. These are my feelings and my feelings alone. I'm not putting them on you to deal with them. Daryl being Daryl warned me to keep my mouth shut and do right but... I had to tell you because I can't just deny them any longer and because as my best friend you also deserve the whole truth about why I am going to get a divorce."

Of course, Daryl will know this, she thought.

"How do you expect me not to answer to what you just said, Rick. I'm not made of stone."

"I know, but despite that, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable."

"I think it is a little late for that now."

"Maybe, but we are adults. We can deal with this."

"I don't know what to say…"

"Nothing. As I said, these are my feelings and though I know I'm obviously not in the best position right now to ask anything of you, there is one thing I'd like to know."

"What's that?"

"Was I always alone in this? When we are together I've always felt this way, drawn to you, to find you, to talk to you, to look at you. It calms me and gives me a perspective of things, you give me hope and positivity. But sometimes I can't help feeling that you feel the same way. And I am not sure if it's something that is really happening or if it's just me forcing it into my imagination. So, was I imagining things, Michonne?

She paused to answer. Her hand was still in his and she felt his warmth, and how even his slight touches will always make her feel. She had chastised herself long for being attracted to him. Something like this always ends up bad, she knew this in her heart, and until now him being married meant those simple flirting moments were something she could handle because they were just moments. She had felt falling for him too and made a promise to never let a soul know about that. Not even Sasha. It was not going to come to anything and she could save herself the hurt, so she dived into her job even more just to forget about that. But that had just been blown away. Now, he was here talking about divorce, about having feelings for her (not just feelings but saying he was in love with her?) Why did her life have to be so complicated? So complicated with the man she has felt more connected with in her entire life. But the truth was that despite his proclamations he was still a very married man. Michonne's heart ached and decided to give in just a little bit. There was nothing wrong with admitting some of what was in her heart, something Sasha told her it was in plain sight but she always denied to admit.

"No, Rick, you were not imagining things." He caressed the back of her hand with his thumb and stood there for some beats smiling to himself. He was not alone. Now he could fight whatever he needed to fight. He had already decided to fight it anyway but knowing that she felt about him the same way gave him hope for the future. "But I am not so sure like you are about how I really feel."

"It's ok. I wanted you to know what I wanted to do and how I felt. I just couldn't let you go without you knowing."

"I understand that, but… what do you think it means for us now?"

He knew she meant she was not having an affair with him while he was getting a divorce. It was there in the cadence of her voice and that was something he would never ask of her. They had barely admitted their feelings to each other and they were about to go back to their homes in less than 10 hours. Rick raised one hand to touch one side of her face, and Michonne closed her eyes to feel the sensation of his soft hands on her skin. His fingers moved across her cheek, in the line of her jawline, up her cheek again, and to her lips. He ghosted over them with his thumb while staring at them. Rick unconsciously licked and bit his own and let out a sigh. He wanted to kiss her so bad right now but he willed his hand to move away from her face and Michonne opened her eyes when she couldn't feel him anymore.

"I am not sure what it means. But if… if you say you'll have me I'll do everything right by you so we can be together. If that is something that you wanted..." She smiled broadly.

"Are you asking me to wait for you, Grimes? I thought you were not gonna ask anything."

"You can always say no."

"Well, it was fun while it lasted, huh?" He chuckled but insisted.

"Will you?"

"I can't promise you that, not now. I can tell you that there is no one in my heart but you and I know how many ways this can go wrong, Rick. We work together, like 'together'. How awkward is it going to be if it doesn't work out?"

"You are basically telling me that you don't trust us."

"It's hard when you are telling me that you are going to divorce your 15 years wife, don't you think?"

"You are nothing like her, and this", he gestured between them, "it's nothing like what we ever had. Lori and I were never best friends. What's better than to fall in love with your best friend, Michonne?"

"Rick, you are making it sound so easy."

"I am sorry if I do because it's not. The matters of the heart are never easy. But I am here and I intend to do what I told you, whether you wait for me to do it or not. I am doing it for me. But one thing I know for sure is that I don't need time to figure out how I feel about you, but maybe you do."

"Maybe..." She said in a low voice. "Shit, I wasn't prepared for this, for you telling me all of this…"

"I know. And I am sorry about giving you all the information at once but I'll never be sorry for telling you that I am in love with you."

"I… I'm not sorry either about you telling me, next time just give me time to recover between news", Rick laughed now.

"Ok. Sounds fair enough." They remained quiet for some minutes. "Thank you."

"For what?" she asked with her brows knitting together.

"For who you are, for what you've brought to my life."

"Rick…"

"I know it might seem not much to you but, it's not that way for me. So, thank you."

She just nodded because she was not sure what else to say. Rick looked at his watch and noticed that it was almost 1.30 am. He really didn't want to go but they both needed the rest.

"I think I better go now. I can see your head stopped giving you trouble".

"It might start again with all this information though," she said to annoy him. He stood up. "Rick, you are going to be ok."

"I hope so."

"You will. And I will be here, with you." She said looking into his eyes. He nodded slightly and started walking to the door.

"Sleep well", he said before opening the door. "I'll see you tomorrow."

With that, he disappeared leaving Michonne alone with her thoughts and her feelings. She closed her eyes to feel the scent he left behind and exhaled heavily.

"Good night, Rick", she whispered to herself.

Today has been quite a day.


Thank you all for reading! I know, I know, but the heart wants what the heart wants. And I probably got carried away but it's Richonne so, don't just blame it on me LOL. Lori is gonna be pissed right? I'll be more than happy to hear your thoughts. Stay safe and healthy y'all!