/-

She had the distinct impression that they were prisoners of sorts. None of the elves looked friendly, and none of them dismounted. The horses were tall, the warriors heavily armed; they made her uneasy. They made Thorin uneasy, at least as far as she could tell.

There was nothing to worry about, right? They made it to Rivendell alright in all the iterations of the story.

Then the questions began - a strange dance between Thorin who only grunted here and there, Gandalf who was trying to hurry everyone along, and the chief elf, who didn't have the courtesy to introduce himself.

"What brings you so far from your halls? Where do you go from here? Why is the wizard accompanying you? Why is the woman? Why do you have your heirs with you? Why now? Why don't you go back?"

And on and on it went. It was pretty clear that Gandalf didn't rate much with the jerk. Oh, it was all couched in a genteel speech to be sure, but he was relentless in his questioning.

"I have not thought of fighting orcs only to be taken hostage by elves!"

Really now, Thorin was ridiculous. Did he not see that the bastard was goading him? The elves closed ranks around them, pushing them into a tight little group in the middle.

And Gandalf was no better. He was smoking and tutting and wasn't doing anything. She had enough!

However, even if she did open her mouth to put an end to the interrogation, what could she say? Would the Jerk in Chief even listen? Would she make it worse?

Nah, you can't make it worse, Thorin got that covered in spades!

"I wonder what happened to our ponies?"

"We shall find those who are still alive, my lady," the chief elf replied, "although I am loath to endanger my soldiers and my horses searching for them."

The nerve! Who the fuck did he think he was?

"Your soldiers? Your horses? Oh, my! Oh, how can I be so lucky?" She continued without giving him time to reply: "it's an honor to meet you, my lord," she said, stopping in place to bow deeply, making a few elves and their horses nervous from the sudden change in pace.

Then she strengthened and smiled widely. She had the pleasure to see all the elves around her looking very ill at ease. "To think that Lord Elrond himself charged into a battle to save us!"

"Erm, I am not Lord Elrond."

I bet you aren't, sugar. "You are not? Then the soldiers? The horses? Did you buy them from Lord Elrond?" Gasps and outraged whispers rose from the elves, snorts from the dwarves.

"Elves do not engage in trading people, surely even the most ignorant of menfolk knows that."

"You said they are yours," she tried to sound reasonable. "Are you a lord too?"

"No." Oh, somebody's feelings are hurt!

"Then who are you?" Gandalf was frantically trying to get her attention, probably to stop her from speaking. If he didn't like it he should've done something about it before. Wasn't he supposed to be bosom buddies with the elves?

"I am Ruven," the elf answered and she was honestly surprised. She wouldn't have thought he had it in him to continue their little chat. Maybe Elrond was a harsher taskmaster than the stories portrayed? Entirely possible.

"Nice to meet you, master Ruven. I am Yeva and I'm not a lord either," she winked at him for good measure.

"Perhaps you would answer a question for me, my lady?"

"With pleasure! Although none of this lady stuff, if you please. My family wasn't nobility and my husband wasn't a nobleman either." She grabbed Thorin's arm for support and squeezed hard; hopefully he'll understand to be quiet.

"I see. But why does a married woman accompany a band of dwarves?"

A band, eh? Count to ten, Yeye; slowly. "Widow."

All of the elves were uneasy now and a few were throwing dirty looks in the direction of Ruven. Well, well. The day was looking better and better, she could tell. Now just be sure you don't break character, Yeye.

"My apologies, lady Yeva, I did not mean to pry."

You most certainly did, you bastard! She counted to ten again, slowly, and made sure to look into the distance. "It was some years ago, master Ruven."

"And you have been traveling with the dwarves ever since? Most peculiar."

No, you're not prying. No sweat, right? The elf was an idiot if he thought this was how he'd got info from her, although Yeva cautioned herself to remain alert. Were elves into psy profiling? Maybe not under this exact name, but beings who lived so long and who could draw upon thousands of years of experience were dangerous. No if and but about it.

The innocuous questions were the worst. Those that called for a simple yes or no were twice as much. Fuck you, Ruven, and the horse you came on!

"Master Thorin is in charge of my welfare now, although I don't see why that should be so." Petulant is the name of the game. "My husband was old, much older than me when he died."

"And where are you going with them?"

"I'm not going with them anywhere!" She squeezed Thorin's arm and he remained blessedly silent, but for a snort. "My plans are my own, master elf. I intend to visit several elven settlements, to honor the memory of my husband. He was a scholarly man, you see, and had read extensively about elves."

"You will remain in Imladris then?" Hm, that was odd; Ruven seemed downright excited by the prospect. Scary thought indeed.

"Not at all. I'll continue with my companions over the Misty Mountains."

"I thought you said…"

"Imladris is but one settlement. A very nice one, I'm sure, but not all that important." Disbelief level: off the charts! She wondered how many insults and passive-aggressive quips she could get away with. "I intend to make my way to the realm of the silvan elves."

Oh, boy, Yeva thought, somehow I don't believe the notion of 'silvan elves' will gain me friends in Rivendell. She had a vague memory of something she once read about those elves being a sort of lesser cousins of the… of the original elves? I should read about it. I shall read everything and get a working knowledge of the politics of this place, she vowed to herself.

"Thranduil Orophelion is the only Elvenking, is he not? The most important elf of all." Ruven looked at her with open derision and his buddies could hardly keep their faces straight. "My husband said so," she spoke in the most decisive tone she could muster. It was all too ridiculous.

Unfortunately Ruven the Jerk was not to be dissuaded from his purpose. He was back to questioning her about where the dwarves were traveling and why. It was this that convinced her that he was in fact interrogating them and not just being rude and nosy.

"They are on the road to the Iron Hills," she said as if it was nothing and squeezed Thorin's arm yet again. Unfortunately, the rest of the dwarves didn't get the hint to be quiet and she couldn't pinch them all.

"Whatever for?" Ruven looked honestly confused. Why? Yeva wondered. It's the most natural thing to visit family, is it not? He knew who Thorin was, he must have known who ruled the Iron Hills dwarves, right?

Honesty is the best policy, Yeye. "What kind of a question is that?"

"Perhaps you do not know their customs well," Ruben started and Yeva thought it too good an opening to miss.

"No, I don't. I didn't even know of their existence until - " she trailed and sniffed and looked as sad as she could manage. I should give myself an Oscar!

"It is understandable that your husband wanted to shelter you." Hm, Ruven was threatening to get away with more insults than her. It was not to be born!

"Indeed he did. He built me a nice shelter in the garden for all my bits and bobs." She shouldn't have said it. It was a stupid little pun and much better left unsaid and now it threatened to make her laugh.

"Yes, well," Ruven continued, just the tiniest bit miffed, "it is remarkable that the master of Thorin Halls travels so far away, with both of his heirs, no less."

Remarkable my ass! Did Ruven know more about their journey? Inspiration struck at that moment and Yeva felt quite pleased with herself.

"Remarkable is a way of saying it. Questionable is another."

"What do you mean, my lady?" How sweet he was smiling at her!

She waved her hand in exasperation and scowled for good measure. "Some things are -" she cut her eyes to where Fíli and Kíli were marching, then right back at Ruven. "Hm. My experience is such that I know how much misery an arranged marriage can bring to -"

"You will be quiet!" Thorin roared at her side, halting her. His eyes were blazing with fury and - shit - betrayal.

As it happened the dwarves were all outraged and the elves all entertained. She was yelling the loudest, begging forgiveness for her thoughtless words.

"I spoke of things I know nothing about, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

It took almost a minute until she could get close enough to Thorin to talk to him without being overheard by elves. "You fucking help or shut up," she hissed in his ear and drove her nails into his hand too.

He did shut up and shut the others too, but he was looking at her with suspicion. He even tried to remove her hand from him. No can do, dear, not until we are away from Ruven. She let him yank her forward, none too gently either, and kept her mouth shut and her eyes mostly on the ground for the rest of the way.

The elves' behavior was different now: Ruven was relaxed and little by little his companions relaxed too. It was unlikely that the dwarves would notice or care, but the difference was so glaring that it made her uneasy.

That Ruven was after inside info was a given, but what was he hoping to find out? And, more importantly, what did he think he found out? She wished she knew if only to serve him more of the same.

/-

They found the ponies had been recovered, along with all of their possessions. If Thorin needed proof they were hunted, then this was as good as it got: the orcs did not care for spoils.

He declined the offered chambers and decided to make camp in a glen. He was somewhat surprised Yeva remained with them; unpleasantly surprised. He did not think he could stomach her presence just then and the rest of the company even less so.

"Thorin, a word." She couldn't walk well enough by herself, so he had to help her, even though the urge to tell her off was overwhelming. They reached a spot quite a way off from the rest of the company. She gestured for him to sit on a stump.

"Sit and I'll -" she lowered herself next to him but faced the other way. "I know it's not what you want, but I have my reasons." He shook his head. "Please, Thorin." He grumbled and she took that as a yes, which it probably was. Women are entirely too much trouble.

"Listen, Ruven doesn't take orders from Elrond," she started without preamble, speaking softly in his ear. This was why she was facing the other way. "Or better said he does not take orders only from Elrond, there's no other logical explanation. He has no stake in this to be that bloody curious. Tell your company to say nothing. And by nothing I mean not one blasted thing. They should neither confirm nor deny. The standard answer is 'I cannot say' or 'our business is our own'. "

"I do not fully understand your purpose, nor do I agree with your methods." She huffed in displeasure, which he thought hypocritical. She did not agree with Tharkûn, yet here she was, doing the same. "I cannot go along if I do not know what you intend to do and I am not certain that I shall, even if you would explain it to me. I do not like it."

"Hm," was all she said for a few moments. "I supplied him with a reason for your journey, one that is not hard to believe. You should have thought of it yourself, Thorin. It was an oversight." Aye, she was right. But half-truths and untruths did not come easily to him.

"I cannot lie as easily as you," he sighed.

"I do not lie. Not ever."

"You said -"

"I said you are on the road to Iron Hills, which is true," she held one finger up. "Not my business if you don't go all the way, is it now? And I said I don't have a good opinion of arranged marriages, which is also true." She held a second finger up. "That's all I said."

He shook his head, not happy with what he was hearing. It was not all that she said.

"The elves… No, not the elves -" She started and stopped several times like she was still thinking about what to say. "Several elves are Gandalf's friends; Elrond is one, I believe. A number of them respect him, even if they are not his friends. Would you agree with me?"

"Aye," it was his impression as well.

"I'm afraid of the rest." He made a sound of disagreement. By and large, elves were not dangerous.

"Did you know they despise Thranduil's people?" He did not, he was not sure on what she based her conclusions either.

"They do. Something's not right. We are missing data and I don't understand where I should look for it." She did not sound like was talking to him anymore.

"We should go back."

"Can I have some of your clothes?"

"Huh?"

"Not yours specifically. I want to pack everything I have and I want to use anything you and the others can spare."

"Why would you do that? Yours are more comfortable."

"I honestly have no idea why. I'm anxious and I'm afraid. I thought it would be easy, you know? We visit Rivendell, we pack some supplies and we move on. How did we get into this shit?"

He shrugged and she shrugged and then got up and together they went back to the camp. It took more than an hour of careful maneuvering before he managed to bring the rest of the company to order.

/-

"You are not sleeping," Fíli whispered low.

"I cannot. I'm afraid I'll have another dream," she moved to sit beside him.

"You should not have said what you did." It was a bit disconcerting: Fíli acted as a mini Thorin and Kíli looked like one. In this at least the film got it right.

"Perhaps," was all she could say. She felt a headache coming, on top of everything.

"Our uncle always insisted we conduct ourselves honorably. I do not know why he goes along with your ill-conceived plan."

"You don't mince words, do you?" He made a sound but said nothing else. "I prefer it, to be honest. The elves tire me and to a large extent frighten me."

"You believe we are not safe here?"

"I don't know. You could say I'm afraid of my own shadow sometimes, so don't put too much stock in how I feel." She took a moment to order her thoughts. "I did not have any plan. I got an idea in my head and went with it." He opened his mouth to say something and she cut him off. "No, listen; just listen. I shouldn't have had to. Thorin should have a canned answer, all ready to go."

"Canned?"

"Something he could have said on the spot. Why did you not say something?"

"It was not my place to, especially as Uncle was there and speaking for us."

"But you feel it's your place to question me now, eh?" He sputtered. "I quite like you, Fíli, I'm not mad at you. I can see where you're coming from."

"Mhm."

"So like Thorin," she chuckled. "Your uncle made a mistake. He never considered he might encounter people who are neither friends nor enemies, but who can easily become one or the other based on what he says - on what all of you say and do."

To this Fíli had nothing to say so she let him ruminate on the problem. They had time.

"I still do not believe it was your place to interfere."

"It wasn't," she allowed. "Now that it's done we have to make the best of it."

He scoffed. "Oh, come on! I did not tell one single lie!"

"You implied -"

"It's not my problem that people draw false conclusions based on incomplete data."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Threat and defense analyst, remember? Ruven was questioning Thorin like he - I don't know. Like he was waiting for Thorin to make a mistake? I don't have anything to back this up, mind, it's just a hunch. Once you were all mad at me for what I supposedly let slip he stopped asking questions. Why do you believe that is?"

"He thought it was the truth," a deep voice came from behind and Yeva shrieked.

"For fuck's sake!"

Dwalin just smirked, unconcerned. "You speak too loud."

It took quite some time for Yeva to calm herself and even more to stop glaring at him, which both Fíli and Dwalin found endlessly amusing.

"You should try to sleep, lass."

"I'm no lass, my good lad." Fíli snorted and Dwalin scowled. "Yeva will do. Lady Yeva or mistress Yeva, if you prefer some distance." Fíli nodded first and then Dwalin. Progress!

"It only worked because I could get Thorin to listen to me. Then he signed you to be quiet, didn't he? I think I drew blood with my nails." Both dwarves shuddered.

The silence stretched between the three of them, although it was not awkward. It felt good to be quiet together, it calmed her.

"You did well. You'll do." On what Dwalin based his judgment she could not say. "Ask if you need help."

Fíli let out a harsh breath and a string of… Kuzul? to which Dwalin replied in so few words that she doubted he said anything at all - other than an obvious dismissal of Fíli's concerns.

"Get some sleep you two, it's my watch now." More angry words came from Fíli before he stomped out to his place. "You too, lass," he took out his pipe and turned around.

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