Chapter 9: I know I can fly!
Today was a good day. Great even! Why? Well, simply because today we have two full hours of flying lessons; the only class I'm actually good at… or would be, if I followed the rules. You see, I've always loved flying on a broom. It's quite possibly my favorite aspect of being a witch, and when I was a kid I used to do it all the time (even if my aunt almost had a heart attack when she saw me flying for the first time). As such, just doing the boring exercises we practice in class doesn't satisfy me at all. I'm used to flying at the highest of heights, going at the fastest of speeds and making dangerous tricks in midair that never fail to impress whoever witnesses them.
Except Professor Nelson. She's never happy with what I do. Mostly because I almost never follow her instructions, but I can't help it! I'm so above the level of my classmates. Like, come on! Give me a challenge!
And today that challenge has arrived.
"Alright, ladies. Listen." Nelson says once the class has ended and she's reunited us at the center of the field to share a few words. "Before you go, I just wanted to make an announcement: the annual Broom Relay's inscriptions are open now." At this, the other girl's start murmuring excitedly, but I just look around in confusion. I'd never heard of that before. "For those of you who don't know, this is an ancient tradition of the school; a friendly competition in which you can test your flying skills against your classmates."
She pauses, and I practically start to bounce in place from the excitement. A broom race! Finally! I'll be able to show everyone I'm more than capable of being a competent witch!
"Now, as the name implies, this is a relay race, meaning you'll have to participate in teams of three. The same teams you have been assigned by color." She continues.
Wait, what? I turn to look worriedly at my teammates, who both appear to be rather disinterested in this whole affair. Great.
"Also, before you decide if you want to participate or not, take into account that second and third years are also allowed to participate, so I recommend you that, if you don't feel like you're ready yet, just wait for another year or two before trying." Nelson then pauses, looking around at our group. "I admit some of you have potential, but you'll have to work as a team and play by the rules if you want to win." Her gaze definitely lingered on me for a second there. Rude.
"But I will always support you if you wish to compete." She smiles, looking around at all the girls forming a semicircle around her. "Alright, that's all for today. Now go to your class before Finnelan comes get you herself." She chuckles at her little joke before mounting her broom and flying away, leaving us to make our way towards the main building.
Of course, I immediately turn to my teammates and shoot them the best puppy dog eyes I can muster as I put my hands in a begging position.
"Can we? Can we?!"
"No, Chariot." Karen immediately says and starts walking away.
"Why not?" I ask as I rush to catch up to her.
"Because I don't want to." She just shrugs.
"Give me a good reason!" I protest, and she stops at this, turning around to glare at me.
"You want a good reason? Alright. I'll give you three: I'm absolutely sick of you acting like a freaking clown all the time and not taking anything seriously, I'm sick of Amelia being as slow as a snail when it comes to flying, and I definitely don't fancy making a fool of myself in the race because of you two. So leave me alone." And with that she storms off, leaving me rooted to the ground at her outburst. Sure, she's criticized me before, and she's gotten angry at Amelia a couple of times, but that was a little too harsh.
"She's right, you know?" I hear Amelia's voice next to me and I startle in surprise. I hadn't seen her catch up with us, but I guess she overheard everything, given her sad smile. "I'm not all that good at flying."
"So what? I don't care if we win!" I protest. "I just think it could be fun, you know?"
"That's another thing." She sighs. "You just want to have fun and don't care about the consequences. You don't take anything seriously."
"I can be serious about this! I promise." I say, giving her my best smile.
"You've promised as much before." She shrugs before walking away, not giving me a chance to answer.
Ugh. What's up with my teammates? I hate them! They don't believe in me one bit.
"Ha. Looks like Chariot has scared her team away." I hear a mocking voice at my back.
"Not like that is a rare occurrence." An equally mocking voice answers.
I turn around and see that my suspicions are correct; standing there are no other than the mischievous twins Anaid and Enid. Yeah, those again.
"What do you want?" I glare at them.
It's not like I don't like them; they aren't actually mean and just like doing harmless pranks and generally getting in trouble, but sometimes they make me really mad with their carefree attitude. Plus, I need someone to discharge my frustrations at.
"Nothing." Enid shrugs, trying to appear nonchalant, even if in her smirk I can see she's clearly planning something.
"Just to help you convince your teammates to participate in the race." Anaid smiles.
"Why?" I ask, suspicious. Now this is just weird.
"Because if you race, there's no way we'll lose." Enid answers, matter-of-factly.
"Hey!" I protest.
"And because we want to be your friends." Anaid quickly says while glaring at her sister, who only shrugs.
Wait a minute... friends? I mean, Croix is fine and all, but sometimes she doesn't have time for me, and has never really called me her friend because she's so afraid of showing even the minimum amount of affection. And I like having friends. Many friends! Back home I had a handful, but here at Luna Nova I usually feel rather lonely. And the twins are nice. Yeah, their teasing can get annoying, but I don't think they have bad intentions, so...
"Fine." I sigh. "What do you have in mind?"
"I was thinking we could do a little prank on them, you know?" Enid smiles mischievously. "I mean, they've been rude to you, so they deserve it."
"And then we could threaten them to do worse until they let you race." Anaid finishes, her sister nodding along at the suggestion, but I just give them a deadpan stare.
"Thank you for the offer, but I think they'd hate me even more if we do that." I sigh. "I'm afraid I'll have to convince them on my own."
"Booooring!" Enid sing-songs.
"Maybe, but probably more effective." I smirk. "You'll see, I'll kick your asses in the race."
"As if!" Anaid laughs. "We have a few tricks up our sleeves."
"Oh?" I raise an eyebrow. "You mean you'll cheat?" They don't even try to deny it; both just nod happily and give each other a high five. "But I thought you said if I compete there's no way you'll lose." I pause, glad to be the one teasing them for a change. "Surely you don't need to cheat in order to beat the school's dunce, right?"
They both look at each other as they stutter for an answer, while I just laugh at their dumbfounded expressions.
"Very well, Chariot, you win." Enid finally answers, rolling her eyes. "If you somehow convince your teammates to compete at the race..."
"And that's a big if." Anaid interferes.
"... Then we won't cheat. Deal?" Enid finishes.
"Deal." I nod satisfied. "Now, if you excuse me, I have two teammates to persuade."
"Please?" I whine for the hundredth as I watch my teammates from my position with my legs on the mattress and my head hanging upside-down.
"No." They both respond at the same time, and I frown at their rejection.
"What about now?"
"Still no." Karen says, continuing to read her stupid book.
"And now?"
"No." Amelia sighs, obviously getting tired of me already.
"Come on! What do you want me to do? Do our chores for a week? A month? Whatever you want I promise I'll do it, just… please!" I beg once again, repeating the same routine we've been doing for the past hour or so.
"Why can't you just accept that we don't want to participate on that stupid race?" Karen pretty much snarls at me.
"If I wasn't on your team you'd compete without a second thought." I pout.
"And if Amelia wasn't such a snail." She retorts, shooting an annoyed glance at our other teammate.
"Well, I certainly don't find the thought of being on the same team as such a bully as you to be a pleasant experience." Amelia shoots back, glaring at the brown-haired girl.
"G-girls, please, calm down." I quickly sit up, not wanting them to start fighting once again and make all of this even harder. Unfortunately I stayed upside down too long and ended up getting dizzy, having to take a moment to regain my bearings.
"Shut up, Chariot." Karen makes a face as her eyes fall back down to her book.
"Wait, please, just listen okay? I know we don't get along very well, but I truly believe that this could be a good experience to…"
"Hate each other even more?" Amelia sighs, rubbing her temple as she shoots a meaningful glance towards Karen.
"No!" I quickly reply, baffled by the sheer pessimism in the blonde's tone. "J-just… look, we…"
"Why do you even care about some stupid race you most probably aren't going to win anyways?" Karen asks with an annoyed tone. And honestly? I don't feel like explaining all my motivations to her since I know she most likely won't understand anyways, but… okay, she asked so the least I can do is answer, especially if I want her on my side. Even if I don't wish to discuss something so personal.
So, after taking a deep breath and mentally preparing myself, I start talking.
"W-well, you see… I-I…"
"Oh wait! I just remembered that I don't care." She rudely interrupts me before I can really say anything.
"Karen!" Amelia chastises her, probably also noticing how mean that was, but it's too late. Her words have already had their affect, cutting straight to my heart. Usually I just try to ignore her, hoping that if I don't react to what she says she'll just leave me alone, but I just can't take it anymore! Not when I was about to open up to them, at the risk of getting ridiculed.
But who cares about a stupid race anyways? Who cares about some stupid childhood dream? Surely not them. They don't care about me at all.
Getting up without a word, I simply glare at Karen as I walk briskly to the exit, trying to ignore the uncomfortable weight on my chest and the tight knot on my throat. I try not to think about the fact that, despite sleeping in the same room and doing pretty much everything school-related together, my roommates haven't made one attempt to get to know me, or see me as anything more than bad luck on their end; a burden they have to carry.
I pretty much throw the door open and stomp down the corridor, not looking where I'm going and just wishing to be alone so that I can calm down and bury these stupid feelings of worthlessness and ugly thoughts that say perhaps Karen and Amelia are right to treat me the way they do. That perhaps I really shouldn't be here. That maybe I should have just listened to my aunt and attended a stupid non-magical school instead of pursuing a stupid and hopeless dream that in the end won't take me anywhere because I have no talent at all.
Soon I find myself at the courtyard sitting on one of the benches, looking down at the grass as the soft warmth of the twilight does nothing to keep at bay the cold creeping inside my chest. Cold that's fed by all the doubts that have surged inside my head ever since I first had the idea of becoming a witch; when my aunt told me I should probably chose a better path for my life.
This feeling… it's ugly. It's unpleasant. It's a feeling I wish I could destroy with a simple spell. But I don't think even conjuring magical butterflies could serve me now.
It'll be alright though; I just need to wait until I can bury these bad feelings deep down and face the future with a smile on my face. As I always do.
"Chariot!" I tense up when I hear my name being called, fearing it'll be Amelia or Karen, but then I recognize the voice and relax slightly. "There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you!"
"Croix." I try to smile as greeting, even if I only look up to her for a second before returning my gaze to the grass. "Do you mind if I don't help you today? I'm not feeling well."
"… Are you okay?" She asks hesitantly after a couple of seconds of silence, apparently just now realizing I'm not as cheerful and energetic as usual.
"I will be." I shrug with a grimace. "It's nothing. I just need to be alone for a while."
"Okay." She answers, remaining standing there as if waiting for something a few moments longer, but then she turns around and starts walking away. And well, I did want to be alone but, is it weird that a part of me wishes she had stayed instead? That she had insisted I tell her what's wrong? At least that'd show she cares.
But come on. She's Croix Meridies. Of course she doesn't care about me. Why would she? I'm just a stupid, clumsy, reckless, idiot…
"Uh… do you want to talk about it?" My head shoots up in an instant when I hear her voice once again, only to see her standing there, rubbing the back of her neck and looking uncomfortable. Wait… did she come back?
"Huh?" I'm so baffled by the thought that I can't form a coherent answer.
"Whatever is bothering you?" She clarifies. "Does it have to do with your roommates?"
"I-I… Ah… well… How do you know that?" I stutter, still not quite believing what's happening.
"I went to ask if they knew where you were, and they gave me some pretty funny looks, so…" She shrugs. "Are they bullying you again? Cause I could turn them into stone if you asked." Croix then chuckles in an attempt to alleviate the tension, but I just fake a smile out of politeness.
"That would be nice." I try to joke. "But it wouldn't bring me any closer to participating in the broom relay race." I then add sourly.
"Really? All of this for a stupid race?" Croix deadpans.
"It's not just about the race!" I yell, glaring at her. I mean, even if it was, why would she dismiss it like that? But anyways, there's much more to it than me just wanting to win a golden trophy. But of course she wouldn't understand, so I just sigh and go back to staring at the ground.
"Okay? Maybe if you told me why this is so important to you I could help you convince your teammates." She says hesitantly, not doubt confused by my outburst.
"I-I… well, I…" I pause, doubt clouding my mind. But I don't understand, why am I hesitating? I was ready to bare my soul to my mean roommates! Telling Croix should be easy. I mean, we're friends, right?
… Right?
"Look, if it's too personal you don't have to tell me." She backpedals, but I panic because I do need to talk about this with someone, and if my roommates won't listen to me, then…
"N-no, wait! I-I…" I take a deep breath, mentally preparing once again. "Okay… Look, I know this sounds weird, but it all started when I was little." I sigh. "As you know, my grandma died when I was five, a-and afterwards my aunt decided to take care of me." I quickly explain. "She was good to me, and she always made sure to tend to my every need, but…" I pause, remembering the deep feeling of… something I couldn't quite put a name to back then, just knowing I didn't like it.
"I felt like… like an important part of me was missing. And it didn't take me too long to realize that this was because she wasn't a witch, and she didn't want me to be one." I frown, the memories of the many times we fought because of it entering my head.
"I remember my aunt telling me that magic was useless in the modern world; that what was valued now was science, technology and innovation. That she didn't want me to be like my mom, and my grandma, and my great grandma, and so on; trapped on the family's farm, solving the little problems of the nearby villagers without ever getting to experience the real world."
"And yeah, I didn't want that either. I wanted to be a witch who could inspire other people; who could make them see that magic could be just as awesome as modern technology, if not more so. I said I'd try to learn it on my own, but…" I trail off, frowning. "You know I'm not exactly the sharpest knife in the shelf." I let out a bitter chuckle.
"For many years I tried learning different spells, but I still couldn't do any magic. That is until…" A small smile finally appears on my face. "Until I learned to fly."
"It was the first time I was able to decipher those stupid runes and realized the spell should be cast on a magic broom." I explain. "Thankfully I had my mother's, and I used it to fly around the fields every day. It was absolutely amazing, honestly." I let out a wistful sigh. "For the first time I felt whole. I experienced some sort of connection with my mom. With my grandma. With my ancestors in general. I felt like a real witch. And it was only because of it that I started studying harder than ever, trying to learn as many spells as possible before I could be accepted in Luna Nova."
"Flying was what allowed me to become a witch, Croix. It's the thing I do best, and I just want everyone to know that yes, this dunce has a talent. I want them to see me as an equal." I feel my shoulders tense when I recall what happened earlier in my room. "But it's not going to happen because my roommates don't think I can do this. And I don't know, a part of me wonders if maybe they're right… if maybe I don't have any magic talents and if maybe I should have listened to my aunt instead of becoming a witch. I-if… if maybe I should just give up."
I start tearing up a bit at the admission. It's not something that's just surged in my mind recently after all; no, this is something I've been worrying about ever since I realized magic wasn't as easy as it seemed; that if I wanted to learn it, it would all be by my own effort, and I've never fully convinced myself that I'll ever be good enough.
Maybe I'm not. Probably. Most likely. Who am I kidding? I'm completely useless! I-I…
My train of thought is suddenly interrupted when I feel a gentle hand patting my head, and I look up to find Croix looking at me with an expression softer than I could have ever hoped to see on her usually serious face. She's smiling at me. And her eyes are just… compassionate. Caring. I can't even describe them. It just takes my breath away for a moment.
"Don't give up." She finally speaks. "Believing in your heart, that is your true magic."
"A-ah… what?" I dumbly answer, unable to understand what's happening.
"Believe in your heart. In who you are and who you want to become." She explains, the same way she usually explains complicated magical concepts; amused that I don't quite get it, but with infinite patience. "Believe in your dreams, and in your capacity to accomplish them. At least, that's what I do." She shrugs. "After all, magic is all about believing."
"Believe in my heart?" I parrot, still trying to make sense of her words.
"Sounds cheesy, I know, but if I tried to explain it in more fancy terms you wouldn't understand." Croix laughs, finally letting her hand drop from my head.
"N-no, it's not cheesy!" I assure her. "I… I think it's beautiful."
"Really?" She rubs the back of her neck in embarrassment as she looks to the side. "'Cause I kinda just pulled it out of my…" She coughs, cutting herself off. "Uh… anyways."
"Believe…" I mumble to myself, still mulling over Croix's words. Belief is such a strong thing. Belief is thinking something is real without having any concrete proof, like believing a broom will rise up in the air when you chant some funny words. But what's most beautiful about belief is that, even if what you believe isn't true yet, you can make it come true if you just believe in it strong enough.
And I believe I can become a witch. I believe I can befriend my roommates. I believe I can win the broom race, and I will! Even if the whole world tells me I'm delusional, I will do it, and I will prove how wrong they are!
"Croix, you're a genius!" I exclaim, getting up from my seat in one swift jump.
"Of course I am." She scoffs, rolling her eyes.
"You're right; I won't give up! I will convince my roommates now, come on, you gotta help me!"
I quickly take my friend's hand and start pulling her towards the dorms, but she remains rooted to the spot, looking at me with wide eyes.
"Wait, Chariot! Slow down, shouldn't we make a plan or something? How are you going to convince them?" She says, struggling to keep her ground as I try to get her to move nonetheless. "You can't just tell them that believing is your magic! That sounds like a generic catchphrase!"
"We'll think of something." I pull her hand impatiently. "Come on, let's go find them!"
"There's no need." I stop trying to get my friend to move when we suddenly hear a voice coming from behind one of the columns that are around the courtyard. From it, my two roommates step in sight, revealing themselves to us. "We heard everything." The one who spoke was Amelia, and she's looking at me with shame and regret clear on her face. The same could be said about Karen, except she's avoiding directly looking at me at all costs.
"You spied on us?" Croix practically snarls.
"We didn't mean to." Amelia quickly says defensively. "We just… we were looking for Chariot, but when we found her she was talking to you, and we kinda overheard the whole thing. Sorry."
"Why were you looking for me?" I can't help sounding distrustful, after all they've never been especially nice to me. Still, Amelia's expression falls a little at the tone of voice I used and I feel a little bad about it.
"Karen?" Amelia nudges her, giving her an encouraging smile, at which my grumpiest roommate answers with a small frown before stepping towards me and wrapping her arms around herself while still avoiding eye contact, clearly showing she's nervous.
"I'm… sorry." She says as if the words taste bitter in her mouth. "What I said earlier… it wasn't right. I shouldn't have treated you like that even if you are the biggest dunce in the academy."
"Hey!" I exclaim indignantly. Was that supposed to be an apology?
"So, yeah." She shrugs, not at all moved by my outburst. "I'll try to be nicer from now on."
"And?" Amelia prompts, nudging her with her elbow.
"And…" Karen sighs. "I will participate in that stupid race."
"We both will." The blonde reiterates, shooting me a kind smile.
I blink. Then I blink again, not believing what I'm hearing. They will participate. In the race. With me. Just like that. No begging or getting on my knees involved. I'm not dreaming right? I pinch my arm just to make sure, and soon enough find myself wincing in pain. Yep, it's not a dream.
"Thank you! Thank you so much! You're the best!" I yell as I pretty much throw myself at them, squeezing them in a tight hug that definitely catches them by surprise, because neither of them return it and instead just complain they can't breathe. But I honestly don't care. I'm too happy!
"Whoa there, Chariot. You're going to kill your teammates and then you won't be able to compete." Croix's teasing voice interrupts me, reminding me that my friend is also there. So, with a mischievous smile I break the hug and turn around to regard her.
"Don't be jealous Croix, there's also some for you." And with that, I go and wrap my arms around her, giving her my undivided attention.
"A-Ah… I-I… Chariot! You know I don't like hugs!" She protests, trying to push me off by the shoulders. "And I wasn't jealous." She ads as an afterthought, which makes me giggle against her neck.
"Sure thing." I reply in a teasing tone.
"You are so gonna pay for this."
"I know."
A/N: Sorry for the delay. Life's been crazy lately! And this chapter was way too long, but I have to say I'm satisfied about how it turned out in the end. As always, thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed and please leave a review, favorite or follow if you want to know if Chariot wins the race soon :)
Thanks to my beta reader moonwatcher13.
