Hi y'all! I am so, so sorry I haven't been around lately. I do have a good excuse though- promise. I found out a few weeks ago I'm having a baby! Unfortunately, this has meant that I am exhausted a lot of the time, meaning I'm often too tired to write. Again, I swear this will never go on HIATUS. Just please bear with me, I will keep writing where I have the time and energy. There are three more chapters already written, so I'll hold out on them a little longer to make sure y'all still get updates, even if they aren't as regular. Once more, this story will never be abandoned.
As always- anything to do with the Avengers is the property of MCU. I make no profit off this story, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Chapter Seventeen- Reset
A solid week passed before everyone was ready to see if Tasha still had some hold over Bucky, but it was mostly her who needed the most time. It was only after some talks with Bruce that she was made to see that this was not harming Bucky, it would be saving him.
It was only that which convinced her to use his code words. Together, Bucky and Steve had come up with some new words for him, but not just words at random, each one held its own meaning to him personally.
They had chosen the same number of words as those already in existence, ten being a number not too long, but long enough that should someone else try to use them, the rest of the team had time to stop them. The process of gaining control would begin, but not be complete until the final word was spoken.
Tasha had agreed to try and re-programme Bucky so he would only respond to the words in one of their voices, but Tony could not guarantee it wouldn't cause problems. All anyone needed was to use some voice manipulation software and they would be able to still gain control of him, but it was a more preventative measure than allowing just anyone to call them out.
During the days that passed until it was time, Tony thought hard about the words that were already programmed into Barnes. Seemingly innocent words with little meaning. They bothered him, so he set about finding some background on Barnes to see if there was something he could piece together on why the words had been chosen by HYDRA.
He found little, but after a frustrating day of searching, he sought out the man himself and outright asked. Barnes paled, looked grey and promptly threw up in the nearest sink. Tony instantly felt guilty and came to the conclusion that they had been chosen because he was afraid of them.
Fetching a glass of water, he dragged the super soldier down to his workshop, trying to calm him. "Breathe, Tin Boy, drink this."
He watched Barnes gulp the water and whimper very quietly. "I uh…I don't really…can I just sit here a moment?"
Tony nodded and busied himself with the gauntlet he had been repairing the day Barnes had come down to the workshop to let him tinker with the arm. He waited for Barnes to pull himself together, and only when he saw a shadow fall over him did he turn around and meet the blue eyes he'd taken for cold and unfeeling when he first met him.
"Sorry, you caught me by surprise, I didn't…I wasn't expecting to be questioned about them," Bucky croaked. "Do you remember them at all?"
Tony shook his head. "Only a few, but I remember you acting very badly to them when Zemo used them, and I don't think it was just because they made you submit."
Barnes nodded, his eyes filled with pain and regret. "Yes, on that you're correct. Every time I go under, I recall what each of those words means and it takes just a little more of me with them."
"Can you tell me about the meaning of them?" Tony asked softly, keeping his voice light and gentle.
"Longing- in Russian it's zhelaniye- I was taunted with being a man out of time. I was born in 1917, I joined the army in 1937, 'died' in 1945. After that, I was frozen and asleep more than I was awake and on missions. Time was passing me by and I was sleeping through most of it."
Bucky's voice became quiet, his gaze focused on something that only he could see.
"Rusted- in Russian it's rzhavyy- more taunts. In HYDRA's eyes, without them, I would rust and become nothing, useless. A rusted bag of bolts with no one to handle the upkeep of my arm. No one else knew of the technology, so in their eyes I was reliant upon them.
Furnace- in Russian it's pech'- this relates to my arm. Supposedly, the arm was forged in a furnace so hot, it had taken several people to build because each one died under the extreme heat. I have no idea how true it is, but the idea that men had died for this arm made me feel sick, their deaths were literally on that hand."
His voice didn't break but his breathing hitched, tears filling his eyes.
"Daybreak- in Russian it's rassvet- I was only ever brought out of sleep for missions and that was it, and rarely did I see dawn. I know that growing up, I used to love watching the sun come up, and I couldn't do that anymore, it was another part of me they had taken.
Seventeen- in Russian it's semnadtsat'- I was born in 1917, there are three numbers in the sequence of words, seventeen, nine and one. It's my year of birth in reverse. I don't really think it had any meaning if I'm honest. Nine and one in Russian are devyat' and odin.
Benign- in Russian it's dobroserdechnyy- being who I was, I knew that there had been deaths on my hands, that I was a killing machine. But when I was frozen in cryo, I was helpless and non-threatening. They could kill me so easily, make a new Winter Soldier and put me on the scrap heap. I think that was worse than knowing I'd killed.
Homecoming- in Russian it's vozvrashcheniye na rodinu- the greatest taunt of them all, the idea that one day I would be able to return to my old life, to come home. Do this mission, they would say, and you can go home. I couldn't fight, they had total control, but in the deepest reaches on my brain, I wanted to fight and to scream, because I was losing myself and each day I remembered less and less of my former life.
Freight car- in Russian it's grozovoy vagon…" Barnes suddenly trailed off and looked sickened. Tony nudged him to continue, hoping the mechanical way he had been talking would ease off once he had completed the list.
"Freight car is a reference to your parents, and the night I killed them. That mission was the only one that bothered me the most, I barely remembered doing it, I was so far under HYDRA's control then, but in my most lucid moments, I recalled what I did, and HYDRA never let me forget that I had murdered a woman who was so kind to me, who had always looked out for me, and a man who had given me a recommendation which put me in the Howling Commandos."
Knowing how much the death of his parents had affected him, Tony could scarcely imagine what it must have been like to be in cryo and have only that to think about. Experiments had proven that even when in cryo, patients could still think, and hear, and feel. The process simply halted everything else, there was no ageing, no breakdown of organs, just a long sleep.
Tony suddenly realised that he was sympathetic towards Barnes, that he was sorry the man had been taunted with the things he wanted most, and the things he hated the most. It was no life, none, and Tony had made it so much harder by verbally beating on him every chance he got.
Warm flesh gently wiped his cheeks, his vision blurred. "I'm sorry I made you cry."
Tony shrugged and swiped a hand over his face roughly. "I'm fine, I just didn't expect my parents to be one of your code words. Have you thought of new ones?"
Barnes nodded and smiled sadly. "Yes, Steve and I thought of nine of them. I thought you could help me with the tenth one."
"What do you have so far? Don't worry about the Russian, I'll Google it later."
Barnes laughed. "Okay. Here goes. Warmth, not in the literal sense, more the warmth of belonging. Steve is a brother, Tasha is a sister- now anyway, and I found a sort of daughter in Wanda. I picked Brooklyn, for where Steve and I grew up together, when he was just a punk-ass kid getting into fights he had no hope of winning."
Tony chuckled at that, having only known Steve as a super soldier and built like a damn tank. The idea of him being some scrawny teenager was hilarious and now he knew he was going to tease the ever-loving shit out of him for it.
"Red, for Tasha's hair, and her fiery spirit. Even though we were HYDRA Assets together, she was, and is, and important part of my life. She is my Malen'kiy pauk. Sunrise, for the ones I missed, but will see from now on, the warmth of the first light as she slips over the horizon into the sky. Polka dot- I used to have the polka dot pyjamas I gave Steve whenever he slept over, they were the only ones I had small enough to fit him, since they were three years too old for me."
Now that had Tony howling with laughter, clutching at his sides and trying desperately not to fall off his stool. "Seriously?" Doubling over when Barnes nodded. "No way, oh Jesus I need proof of this!" Barnes promised to produce a photo as evidence, and even offered to let him keep it as blackmail material.
"Control, me taking my life back into my own hands. It's not just about having control, but not allowing someone else to have that control over me. Tasha is going to put in a safe word, of sorts, one that allows me to stop the take-over if I have time. Promise, one I made myself, in that I wouldn't ever fall into the wrong hands again, and one that I was made- that I would never be allowed to be taken away."
That promise had to have come from Tasha, he reckoned. Or Steve, probably both. Either way, Tony silently agreed with the promise, but for more practical reasons of if he did fall in the wrong hands, there was no telling they'd be able to stop him, or worse, bring him back to himself.
"Howling, as in the Howling Commandos. I served with Steve and that squadron was important to me. Steve and I did so much together, it was where we went from best friends to brothers, we fought for each other, always prepared to die for the other if it ever came to it. There was this song we used to dance to in a bar we visited, it was by the Andrews Sisters, called Where Have We Met Before. It played often, we'd jig to it, sing along. I couldn't really pick one word out of it, so I just chose Beginning. We met in Brooklyn, went to the same school and lived in the same block."
Tony nodded. "Seems as good a choice of word as any. So, you have nine words, but can't find a tenth?"
Bucky smiled. "Yeah, thought maybe you could help me think of something."
He sat back and thought about it, wondering what kind of word might have some meaning to him. "You have a colour in there, why not another?"
The idea had merit, Bucky thought, but couldn't settle on a colour that meant something. There was the blue of Steve's shield or uniform, but he already had so much that linked to Steve. He looked at Tony, shrugging. "Can't think of anything."
Tony got up and fiddled with one of his bots, DUM-E he read on its body, the bright yellow hurting his eyes a little. He wasn't fond of yellow, no particular reason, but not keen. Tony met his gaze and smiled, then went back to working on DUM-E.
"What's wrong with the bot?" He asked.
"Nothing, just giving him a tune up, I try to give all the bots one every few months, make sure they're running okay, and get the download of their data banks for FRIDAY to store. I'm sure they communicate with each other, and FRIDAY, but she never answers when I ask her."
Bucky found it amusing that each of his bots was either a he or she, not just 'it'. They were just metal and plastic, but he always gave them personalities, a little injection of AI technology so they could act on their own.
He scooted closed on his roller stool and watched Tony work, the surety of his hands when he used his tools, the jumping of muscles in his forearms. He recalled the sadness in those hazel eyes, the tiniest flecks of green in them, barely noticeable, but there.
Those eyes had held so many emotions in the short time that he had known him, rage, hurt, suspicion, anger, warmth, sadness, misery, but never joy. Never unadulterated joy, the kind that Steve had always had when he stayed over, or when Tasha got to spar in the gym with him, before and now.
He wondered if joy was something Tony had experienced in the years that Howard Stark had been alive. Had he ever been told he was important? Had Howard ever said that his greatest success was his son? Because Bucky sure knew that Howard had fathered an amazing son with a brilliant mind, and one of the greatest feelers of compassion.
Maybe not when it came to Bucky, but that had slowly filtered in. He could no longer see the contempt or hate in his eyes when he looked at him. He still saw the sadness, but it seemed to have dimmed a little.
"Hazel," he said suddenly.
Tony's head shot up and he blinked several times. "What?"
"My last word, the one that locks the reset in place."
He cocked his head to the side. "Why that all of a sudden?"
Bucky shrugged. "It just popped into my head," he said, somewhat dodging the question.
"Okay, well, there you have it. Ten words that will reset you to Winter Soldier mode. Are we ready to do this?"
A shudder rippled down his spine at having to face his current code words one more time. "You'll be there?"
"Yes, of course, I'm overseeing the whole thing."
Even though he would only be there in an observatory fashion, hearing that Tony would be there calmed him slightly. "Then let's get this done."
-oo0oo-
Hashing out the location for the reset had taken some working out, no one really wanted to be exposed to him should this go wrong. So, Tony had opened up the room he had built for if Bruce could feel a Hulk-Out coming on. It was extremely well reinforced, and had been tested, there was no way Bucky would be able to break out if he did go soldier on them.
He paced nervously, unable to contain his energy and fear. Wanda had elected to be a shield for everyone, her powers able to stop Bucky in his tracks. Steve had his shield out, just in case. Bruce was outside the room, watching the monitors. Vision was staying away, he didn't agree with putting Bucky through the agony of having to be reset, even though Bucky was on board with it. Clint was in his nest, on one of the highest beams watching over them.
Tony had the Mark whatever number he was on now stood in the corner of the room, ready to encase him in its protective cocoon if needed. That left Tasha, who would be speaking, but he was confident that she would be able to get out of his way quickly.
A hand touched his shoulder and he jumped, Steve's worried blue eyes meeting his own. "You can still back out, Bucky. No one is going to force you to do this."
He smiled. "I know, but this is something I want to do. Even if it's only to put new words in my brain, it means old HYDRA agents can't come crawling out and try to do a reset."
"Alright, I just want you to know that you can back out."
"Thanks, but I'm okay. Tasha, you're up!" He called.
She took a deep breath and nodded, tried to smile but it just wobbled off her face. He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "We got this, kid. When you're ready, go for it."
"Zhelaniye, rzhavyy, pech', rassvet, semnadtsat', dobroserdechnyy, devyat', vozvrashcheniye na rodinu, odin, grozovoy vagon," her voice remained steady, strong, each word enunciated clearly, clipped.
Bucky felt the familiar pull of the words, waited for onslaught of horrifying memories, but nothing happened, just a dull thumping in the back of his skull. He frowned. "Try a firmer voice."
She sighed and went through the list again, getting louder but nothing happened, the reset didn't take place. "I'm sorry, Bucky. I'm doing it exactly how HYDRA always did."
He blew a frustrated breath out and ran a hand through his hair. "I don't understand. Maybe the hold you had on my had dimmed, I've been away from you for so long now."
"But Zemo was able to reset you- why?" She asked.
He shrugged. "I have no idea."
"I do," Tony called. "I have a theory anyway. I think it's all about conviction. Zemo wanted to reset you, because that way you could do the worst damage to us was to go soldier and attack us. Tasha doesn't really want to reset you, because she knows the pain it causes you."
Steve nodded slowly and stepped forward. "Didn't you say you were usually reset after coming out of the blender?"
Bucky snorted a laugh at the word but nodded. "Yeah, it was always after the electro-shock therapy."
Tony nodded and stroked his goatee in thought. "You were at your most vulnerable, exposed and impressionable, meaning it was easier to put you back under a reset. It probably helped further that they meant business. You know Tasha doesn't want to hurt you, and she's reluctant to do it, so you're able to fight it. I think that over the years, you've become weakened to her hold, because you've been apart for so many years."
It was entirely possible, it had been a great number of years since he and Tasha had worked together, so resetting him had proven harder, until they'd found others who had no qualms in ensuring he knew they meant business.
"So, what the hell do we do now?" He sighed.
Most of them shrugged, looking lost, except Tony. He stood with a dark smile on his face. "I say we get someone else to try, someone who doesn't mind causing a little pain."
There was something in Tony's eyes that made a shiver fear work its way down his spine. A dark enjoyment, something that said he wanted to do this. "You mean someone who has a reason to get some revenge?" He murmured, face pale.
He shrugged. "I'd say it would make us a little more even."
Tasha strode forward, her face twisted in rage, but Clint shot down and grabbed her, holding her back from him. "Tasha, no, don't get involved, this has been coming, you know it has."
He dragged her from the room, giving them both some space to sort out their differences. "This would make you feel better?" He croaked.
Uncertainty flashed in his hazel eyes, but there was also resolve. "Somewhat, yes."
Bucky closed his eyes and sighed. "Very well, if you think you can do this, go ahead. I hope your Russian is flawless, it can only be spoken in Russian, English won't work."
"Zhelaniye," Tony said boldly, his face cold. "Rzhavyy, pech'."
The burning pull in his mind started, as did the screaming. Bucky lashed out with his metal arm, colliding with nothing as Tony dodged him easily.
"Rassvet, semnadtsat', dobroserdechnyy."
The idea that he could speak such perfect Russian had never occurred to him, Tony had always played dumb when he and Tasha had conversed in front of him, or her and Clint.
"Devyat', vozvrashcheniye na rodinu, odin, grozovoy vagon."
Bucky suddenly stood straight, his expression blank. "Gotov k vypolneniyu'," he said in a monotone.
The Soldier stood to attention, patiently awaiting his orders. He felt rusty, out of swing, there was a faint buzzing in the back of his mind, like an angry swarm of bees in the distance.
"Asset," a voice spoke clearly. "You are being given new instruction. Give indication you understand."
The Soldier nodded once, sharply. "Yes."
The face of Tony Stark came into view, one of his oldest missions coming to the forefront of his mind, his entire body coiling for the strike. "Mission active: Kill Tony Stark."
"Mission deactivated," Tony said sharply, his voice a bark, cold and clipped.
He instantly backed down, going back to standing at attention. He did not fight the handler, the person who issued his codes could activate and deactivate missions, even if it his current mission was about that person.
"Listen closely, Soldier. All past missions, active or not, you will forget them. All of them. They are no longer active and you will not in any way act on them. Is that understood?"
"Yes," The Soldier responded instantly.
"Your reset codes are no longer in existence, you will not respond to them in any way if they are used. Your new codes will be as follows: teplo, Bruklinskiy, krasnyy, voskhod, v goroshek, kontrol', obeshchaniye, voyushchiy, nachalo, svetlo-korichnevyy. Confirm acceptance of codes."
The Soldier stood to attention. "Confirm. Code words are warmth, Brooklyn, red, sunrise, polka dot, control, promise, Howling, beginning and hazel."
Tony nodded. "Yes. Furthermore, no one, except those of the Avengers can trigger these words, when spoken by anyone other than an Avenger, you will not respond. Only…" There was a pause before he was able to continue. "Only your teammates can use your codes."
The Soldier nodded again. "Yes."
"Now how the hell do I get Bucky back here?" He asked the room.
The Soldier frowned. "Bucky?"
Tony blinked and nodded. "Yeah, he's like, the other half of you. Sort of. It's hard to explain, you were Bucky Barnes up the beginning of 1945, then HYDRA had hold of you, you were often put into cryo-sleep, and trained to be an unstoppable killer."
The Soldier nodded. "The Asset will comply with all requests."
"Okay. Then I request that you bring back Bucky."
The Soldier gave one last sharp nod, and within seconds, a glaze-eyed Bucky stood there blinked in confusion. "It worked?"
"Like a charm," Tony said with an easy grin.
He raised his eyes to the hazel ones. "You called me Bucky," he whispered in shock. Every face in the room showed the same shock. "You called me a teammate."
