Thank you very much for euphoric who has helped me beta this story! Also, thank you for LittleDoot and Nobody(Super_NovaGrey) who have helped me proofread. Also, thank you for TungstenCat who has advised me with the romance aspect of the story!
Warning: Mentions of desecration of a dead body, blood-drinking and self-inflicted injuries.
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"Kanao-nee-chan."
A touch of warmth. An echo of laughter. A myriad of sad smiles.
And a heartfelt request.
"Please… Take care of our brother."
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Kanao awoke to a pair of gleaming, slitted eyes.
Immediately, her Nichirin sword was unsheathed and pointed towards the demon. It was cold and dark, with sunlight barely peeking in from the entrance of the cave. Unnatural red mist permeated the chamber, the unmistakable mark of a demon. Kanao struggled to remember how she ended up here, alone with a demon—
The demon, with familiar long burgundy hair. Familiar burn mark on his forehead. Familiar hanafuda earrings. Familiar red eyes.
"...Tanjirou...san," Kanao gasped upon realising who it was.
Tanjirou didn't reply. Didn't even bat an eye. He sat hugging his knees at the deepest part of the cave and simply stared at her with dead eyes. Were it not for the slight movement of his breathing and the saliva visibly streaming down his gagged mouth, Kanao would have thought he was a corpse.
Kanao lowered her arm, just realising that she still had her sword pointed at him. She frowned at her Nichirin blade, which had a faint stain of blood. It did not emit demonic mist, so it must have been a human's. Whose—
Realisation hit once more.
"Nee-san," Kanao glanced around the cave. There was no trace of the Insect Hashira. The last thing Kanao remembered was trying to stop her sister from decapitating Tanjirou. She turned to him sharply, but dismissed her suspicion right away. There was no way a newborn demon could defeat a Hashira, fix a bamboo gag into his own mouth and bring the other Demon Slayer with him to hide in a cave. "Did she let you go?"
Tanjirou didn't reply.
Kanao sheathed her sword and scrutinised her unresponsive friend. Tanjirou was a mess; his wounds may have healed, but his entire body was caked with blood. It was unfathomable how he could sit there silently without doing anything to her despite clearly salivating from hunger.
Kanao didn't understand. Why was she here? Why did Shinobu let him take her away?
It didn't matter.
Tanjirou tilted his head and blinked at her when Kanao stood up abruptly.
"Wait here, Tanjirou-san," Kanao told him as she made a beeline to the cave mouth. "I'll be back soon."
Without waiting for his reply, Kanao left.
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Once she was far away from the cave, Kanao flipped her coin.
She stared at the coin before flipping it again.
Stared at the coin. Flipped again.
Again. Again. Again—
Heads.
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His stomach rumbled with hunger.
It felt as if there was a black hole in his belly. It slowly sapped his energy, making him sleepy, especially with the sun high in the sky. In the dark nook at the deepest part of the cave, he tried his best to stay still, conserving his energy while suppressing his appetite as he waited for her to return.
He stared blankly at the bright entrance of the cave. He did not question whether she had abandoned him, nor whether she would come back to kill him with her blade. She had promised him she would return, and he trusted her despite her tempting smell. Mm. She sure had smelled good.
No! He clenched his teeth. She was not food. She was her. She was… Friend. Not food. She smelled good, just like the tasty smell currently wafting through his nose, but not food—
He choked on his own saliva in surprise when she suddenly appeared at the cave entrance with food.
He had not noticed her coming despite knowing her scent, as it had been covered by a far more overwhelming smell. It was rotten and human and smelled so good… just like—
"Son—"
"Mmph!" He let out a muffled scream and shook his head wildly. No no no no NO!
She ignored his cries and came closer, dragging a human body into the cave. He scrambled back, crouched inside the nook and made himself as small as possible. The smell was horribly delicious, prompting him to desperately cover his twitching nose and gagged, salivating mouth.
A shadow fell over him. Soon after, a hand grabbed his collar and hauled him out of the hole. He was immediately greeted with a familiar, pretty face, though it was hard to focus when his mind was filled with thoughts of food food food.
"Tanjirou-san." She pulled the corpse towards him and snatched the bamboo gag away from his mouth, making him flinch. "You've just transformed, and you're injured. You have to eat if you don't want to die."
He shook his head and looked away. She moved the corpse closer to him. He sobbed, tears leaking from his eyes, because it smelled of food but it was his mother, smiling and teasing him and was bathed in blood—and the contradiction drove him to madness.
A soft hand cupped his cheek. He whimpered, but still allowed her to turn his face back towards hers.
"It's not Kie-san," she looked him in the eye and whispered. "I would never dare to do that. It's a dead body I found buried in the snow far away from your home. An old man. He might have slipped and fallen off the cliff recently."
Tanjirou shook his head still. Mum, it was his mother, he would rather die than—
A face was shoved towards him.
"Look properly," she said. "It's not Kie-san. Nor is it Rokuta-kun, Shigeru-kun, Hanako-chan, Takeo-kun or Nezuko-san. It's an old man."
Blue and frozen stiff, the face looked as if it was screaming in agony. But it looked old, with white facial hair and wrinkling skin. So unlike his mother.
A human, nonetheless. A person. Just like Rokuta, Takeo, Hanako, Shigeru, Nezuko and Mum.
"Eat."
"N-no."
Her eyes narrowed at his denial.
"Think of this as an animal. A rabbit. Or a boar. Pork, this is pork. It's delicious pork, see?"
She savagely tore apart a chunk of meat from the arm and presented it to him. Now that she had said that, it sure smelled like pork. Just like the juicy, tasty meat he and his family had rarely had, back when Dad was still alive. Pork. Meat. Food. He was hungry…
Drooling in hunger, he opened his mouth wide and—
—Bit his own arm.
His sharp teeth punctured his flesh. The pain that followed was excruciating. As blood flooded his mouth, he gagged, as it was the foulest thing he had ever tasted.
He didn't let go, however. This was his own arm, but it was at least not others'. He was made of flesh, just like Mum and her and the food-meat-dead human in front of him. He was human, he was just like them.
He ignored the pain and clenched his teeth further. Hungry? He might as well eat himself.
Suddenly, something other than the horrible taste of his blood dripped into his mouth. His eyes snapped open, because his blood had tasted awful but this tasted metallic and amazing and… it came from her palm.
He didn't realise she had kneeled in front of him, had discarded the corpse and slit her own palm to let her precious human blood flow. She clenched her fist, forcing more blood to flow down through his teeth into his mouth.
He recoiled, immediately releasing his wounded arm before turning away to retch.
She grabbed his shoulder in an attempt to turn him back towards her. He shoved her away as guilt and fear flooded him.
"W-Why?" He croaked. "Why are you doing this?!"
She widened her eyes in surprise. It was the first time Tanjirou spoke in a full sentence. Her blood, no matter how little he had ingested, had replenished his energy enough for him to retain some mental clarity.
When Kanao remained silent, Tanjirou grew frustrated. He surged forward to grab the hilt of the sword on her waist with both hands and pulled. A normal human would've immediately lost the sword, being naturally weaker than a demon in terms of strength, but Kanao wasn't a normal human. Her Nichirin blade stayed in its sheath.
"Just kill me already!" Tanjirou roared at her. "You said that only Demon Slayers can kill a demon. I've turned into one, so what are you waiting for?!"
"... You remember," Kanao finally replied. Her hold on his hands tightened. "That means you should understand what I'm saying. I have flipped the coin."
Tanjirou, in fact, did not understand. "Huh?"
"I've tossed it. Fate decided that I should not kill you."
His grip on the sword handle slackened, though hers on his hands did not.
"That's it…?" Tanjirou gaped in disbelief. "I have turned into a man-eating monster and will probably kill many humans from now on, and the only reason you are sparing me is because...you tossed a coin?"
When she nodded, he could not help but scoff.
"Kill me."
"No."
"You are a Demon Slayer, and I am a demon. Kill me."
"I refuse."
"Don't be unreasonable! Do your job—"
"I said NO!" Kanao screamed. "I have decided to save you! You told me to do what my heart says and so I flipped the coin, I flipped it six times until I got heads because I don't want to lose you too!"
Tanjirou was stunned, because never had she raised her voice towards him, nor had he ever seen her cry. Her shoulders trembled and her cold eyes were glassy with tears. It was only then he realised how cold her hands were and how pale her tear-streaked face was. It was snowing outside; even with her Breathing techniques she must have been freezing. He didn't even know when was the last time she ate.
Tanjirou thought he had lost everything. His family was massacred overnight, and he was now a man-eating abomination. He thought he was better off dead than alive, because he could be with his family that way, but…
"Please take care of my sister, Tanjirou-kun."
He looked down at the slender hands on his. Her blood was still flowing, trickling down his hand to the ground. The wound had not closed yet; the cut on her palm must be quite deep.
It must have hurt.
Slowly, Tanjirou pulled his hands from her grip. She let him go, knowing that he had given up on trying to take her sword for now. He stood up, went to the mouth of the cave before tearing a piece of cloth from his haori to scoop some snow, careful to avoid the sunlight. She was still kneeling at the same spot when he came back, arms limp by her sides.
She didn't look up when he sat back down in front of her. Gently, he took her bleeding hand before dabbing at the wound with the cloth-covered snow. When the blood finally stopped flowing, he tore a long piece of cloth from his haori and bandaged her hand. He lowered his head before blowing on her cold hands to warm them up.
Finally, he heard her sigh.
"You should've at least licked them first," she said. "I cut my hand for nothing."
"I'm sorry."
"I assume you won't even eat the dead body."
"I'm sorry..."
He let go of her hands and looked up. His hand rose to softly wipe her tears.
Her cheeks are still cold…
Straightening up, he slid his hand to the back of her neck and pulled her head to rest on his shoulder. She tensed for a moment before gradually relaxing.
"I'm sorry," he continued to mumble, stroking her head with his clawed hand, because he belatedly realised how cruel he had acted towards her just now. I'm sorry for becoming a demon. I'm sorry for asking you to kill me. I'm sorry for making you drag a dead body through the icy winds of winter. I'm sorry for shouting at you. "I'm sorry…"
"I should be the one to say sorry, Tanjirou-san," she murmured in return. He could feel her small hands patting his back, awkward but comforting all the same. He knew she was not used to consoling someone like this. "I'm sorry for being late. I should've come sooner. I'm sorry for being selfish. I should've killed you, I really should. You are a demon, and I am a Demon Slayer, but…"
But she did the opposite.
He hugged her tighter and mumbled another apology. She fell silent again. Finally, she moved to pull back, and he let her.
She locked eyes with him.
"I have decided to save you," she declared with a serious expression. "It would be foolish if you simply died from starvation. So, promise me, Tanjirou-san. You have to live, and I will make sure you survive."
"Don't blame yourself… And live."
Live.
At least, for her…
He nodded.
