Chapter 8: Parallel fears, opposite gain.
When Hiccup recovered his visions, the first thing he felt was blazing light of torches, burning his retina. Blinking a few times to ease the sore feeling in his eyes, he found himself tied to a chair, his head resting on the top of what seemed to be an articulated headrest that could change in inclination, but the rest was hollow, leaving his back resting against the enclosed air of the room. Said air was slowly filled with an herbal fragrance, not unpleasant, but unsettling nonetheless. Against the wall on his left stood Magnus, stirring something in a pot that was cooked by a small fire underneath.
The big Viking lifted the wooden spoon out, Hiccup caught a glance of what looked like a green, viscous, liquid. Magnus then added a dark purple, almost black flower where he carefully detached the petals and discarded the rest. The substance quickly turned into a darker color. The Headless then lifted the small pot off the fire and place it immediately into another bowl, bigger this time, containing cold water. After the hissing sound of hot metal against cold water ceased, Magnus waved his hand to clear off the steam before grabbing a chair and sat near to Hiccup. During all this time, Hiccup held his green gaze onto the Headless but he wasn't bothered by it. Grabbing Hiccup's flying armor, Magnus analyzed the suit a bit before taking out a large knife from his belt and cut out the leather, exposing the metal padding underneath, which he removed by using a blacksmith plier. The skin underneath was in a violent shade of violet, result of the powerful last punch Eir landed on him.
Magnus then took out a sharp stick which he coated with the black liquid, now turned into a paste from the pot, and started to draw a circle in which was inscribed a simple rune, gently grazing the young Viking's skin. Hiccup's eyes opened wide open? They were branding him? He was a chief, this was, one illegal, two an open declaration of war. But then he remembered that the Headless obviously didn't follow the rules established by the Viking council of the Archipelago and he was already at war with them. In a surge of panic, he tried to get free on his restrain, without much success. Helpless, he watched Magnus completed the symbol after recoating the stick a few times, leaving behind a thick trail of paste. The Headless then grabbed a piece of cloth and cleaned up the messed-up part of the drawing, leaving behind a clean circle around the bruise, and walked away. A surge of hope came down upon Hiccup when he thought, that maybe, it could be one of those tribal markings, like the one Eret or Dagur wore on their face. But that hope was quickly burned away when Magnus came back with a torch and set the paste on fire.
A sharp jolt of pain shot through his limbs as the paste burned. Hiccup tensed up on the chair, his breathing became ragged, sweat started to pearl upon his forehead. The auburn Viking gritted his teeth to not let out a cry of pain, trying his best to endure it. Inwardly, he wished it to end soon but the flame didn't seem to fade. After what felt like an eternity, the flames died on his chests, and his breathing slowly started to become normal again. Magnus shrugged away the ashes that remained without batting an eyelid when his hand came in contact with the hot embers, and a look of satisfaction came upon his face. Below it, circling the purple bruise was a dark circle with a rune in it that seemed to be a part of the skin since the beginning. There were no burn marks around it, just a clean mark embedded into the skin. Magnus put the cloth over Hiccup's head again before untying him and leading him outside of the room, then onto on a series of catwalks and passageway, at least, that was Hiccup deduced when he breathed in the cold, refreshing air of the night. Suddenly, the duo stopped and Magnus removed the cloth covering Hiccup's head, before saying.
"The communal forge is that way" He gestured the forge in front of him "if you want to repair your armor." Before walking away. "Remember "The Headless added over his shoulder "Tomorrow first light, in the main arena. Don't be late."
Hiccup was still in a trance, as he started to walk mechanically in the mentioned direction. I am branded, nothing, just a slave, a piece of property. Useless again. On the way, he came across a couple of Vikings that didn't pay him much attention. Some saw the black marking on his chest but didn't react to it. However, it was only when Hiccup felt the cold air brushing against his bruise that he snapped out of his trance. He quickly, covered the marking with his hands, not wanting anyone to realize that he was no more than a piece of property. Aimlessly wandering into the deserted forge, he picked up a couple of tools, and laid his armor down onto the working station repair.
Every movement he did pulled onto the bruise and reminded him of the embarrassment that he know was. Burying his shame into the pain and energic blow, he finished the reparation on his suit and dashed back a quickly as possible, tried his best to be stealthy by avoiding any kind of patrol. He couldn't dodge all of them but the few he encountered didn't pay him much more attention than anyone else. Back at the lonely hut, he stood still, tears streaming onto his cheek before dropping on his knee with a soft sound, accessing the harsh reality.
He had nothing anymore. No tribe, no friend, and not even his dragon to console him. If before he lost his tribe, his friends, his statues because of the oath he was forced to take, now he lost them again because he was no longer deserving to have them. Alone, in his hut, Hiccup wondered if the oath still holds because he took it using the identity of the chief of Berk, and now, he lost it. For a brief moment, he considered ending it all, since he didn't matter to anyone anymore. Just like before I met Toothless. He rose up and looked around, finding a rusty knife laid on the counter. With shaking hands, he approached to his throat, the blade slowly piercing through the skin, but when drops of blood flowed on his hands, he dropped the knife, the sound resonating on the ground, but in Hiccup's mind, it was louder than Thor's wraith. Looking at the utensil with horrified eyes, he though back of his action. One last wish prevented him from dying this way.
0-0
The rest of the riders landed heavily in the night of Berk, but it didn't compare to the weight on their shoulder, and most importantly, on their heart. Hiccup was captured and was trapped by the oath he was forced to take. They, on the other hand, were powerless to do anything. They can come up with a plan to rescue him, as they were outmatched in numbers, strategy, and strength. Dismounting their dragons, Fishleg traded a look with the other riders. The twins were not pulling any pranks, losing their general cheerfulness. Snotlout wasn't boasting any remarks about his performance, instead, he was looking at the ground, shades of anger, despair, and frustration cycled through on his face. Even the dragons sensed the feeling of their riders and looked down. But the worst of all was Astrid. She looked like she lacked that very spark of life in every being, acting as an empty vessel, without purpose. Having not made a single sound during the whole flight, she even distanced herself from the group, flying a little bit ahead. Of all of them, she was the one Fishleg was the most worried about, knowing full well that it could lead to some irreversible damage.
Taking a deep breath to calm his inner turmoil of emotions, as much as the husky Viking wanted to break down right there, he repressed his feeling, remembering that conversation where Hiccup made him promise,
0-0
"Fishleg, I need to talk to you about something new I discovered with the Deathsong amber," Hiccup said, bursting suddenly in the clubhouse of Dragon's Edge where he was watching a game of Maces and Talon between Astrid and Heather on one side, the twins on the other.
The Husky Viking excused himself and followed the leader of their group into his hut. After Hiccup closed the door, he spoke up.
"Alright Hiccup, what do you need to tell me this privately, this isn't something about Deathsong amber."
" I know, Fishleg, is just, how to say," Hiccup said hesitantly "This, project Shellfire, is just, the more I try to find out what it is, the more I get confused."
"But it isn't about the project Shellfire alone, so tell me Hiccup?" Fishleg interrupted sternly,
Hiccup sighed "You know, this project, whatever it is, it is meant as the ultimate weapon, designed to wipe us out in go. Viggo is relentless and it is becoming more personal between him and me, no matter how much he tries to keep his cold, you and I both know that." The blond Viking nodded. "So I want you to step up."
" What?" replied Fishleg, surprised by the request, "Are you leaving us behind?"
"Don't get me wrong Fish, is just in the case of something happening to me, or in a situation where I have to give myself up for the safety of you guys."
"Hiccup, you don't. : Fishleg tried to interrupt once more to contradict but was promptly cut off.
"Just listen to me" Hiccup said in an authoritative tone. "I want you to step up if something big happens to me. In these cases, I want you to step up and lead them to safety, don't bother about me, just get them somewhere safe."
"But Astrid is your second in command, she is an awesome, fierce warrior, a fierce tactician, she cares about you more than her own life" For some reason, Fishleg saw his friend blush slightly at the comment but continued "and overall is much more qualified than me."
"Yeah, Astrid is an awesome warrior, can make up an assault plan quicker than anyone, is a caring person but these attributes would become a weakness. Not to sound condescending or anything, Fish, but if all hope is lost for me, what do you think you can do more? Do you understand me?" Hiccup replied
"Yeah, I know what you mean, but I don't think I will be able to. I don't even know who." Fishleg acknowledges a bit panicked: Hiccup was their best flyer and Toothless far more powerful than the rest of their dragons.
"Just take a deep breath and suppress any emotion. All it would take is just think rationally, and you are the best one for this."
"But, Hiccup, I still don't think I will be able to."
"Just promise that you will think rationally, and the rest of them to safety. Because I know my best friend is a Viking of his words. "Hiccup said while resting a hand on Fishleg's shoulder.
"Alright, I promise, but you also promise me that you will not do some silly thing that involves sacrificing yourself for our safety"
"I'll try my best" Hiccup said heavily," I'll try my best."
•—0—•
Seeing the current situation and the general atmosphere of the riders, Fishleg deeply sighed as, for one more time, Hiccup has though out everything and planned the adequate strategy to deal with it, and once more, he was right.
"Alright, I suggest that we each head home and try to rest. We figure the rest out, tomorrow." Fishleg said. Without a response, the group split up, each one for their respective home. Glancing a last look at the horizon, Fishleg head home as well, Meatlug walking into his step.
Meanwhile, the hollow exterior of skin that was Astrid wasn't so empty after all. Anger, despair, frustration, fury, hate, wonder, guilt cycled through her body, building their own veins, fighting her blood for the space inside her body. Wandering slowly towards her family huts, her gaze lingered toward the chief's hut, standing more recluse from the rest of the village. Her eyes trailed over the walls, before resting on a specific window. Said window sat on the roof, and each time for the past six full moons, she saw faint candlelight peeking out of it. Knowing it was Hiccup inside, working on some invention of him or some paperwork that he's new chief duty brought to him, sitting by his desk, alone.
Alone when he shouldn't have been. He was the chief, she was his soon to be wife, the women that would rule beside him, and will have to provide him in all the ways a wife can provide her husband. And of course, she was not expected to pick everything up as soon as they were married, so she had every right, even the duty to be by his side, not necessarily taking up his chores of the village, but being there, helping him out, learning of the run the village, or just, relieving him some of the tension away. But she wasn't. She wasn't because she, for some reasons that were still unclear to her, she wasn't there, refusing the start this new aspect of her life: this domestic aspect that was expected from her, even if they were not married yet, as the chief's betrothed. As pretty everyone on Berk knew, the wedding is just a question of when, and the weight was suffocating.
But she wasn't there, instead, she ran away, going on to train, patrol on Stormfly, just focusing on rebuilding the village, to get away from it. And Hiccup may have noticed her running away from him, her future duty, and thus, making him asking her services less and less, just normal patrols, keep an eye on the academy, just like she was a normal dragon rider and not his promised. But somehow, he still found the time to be her betrothed, an aspect that just got her more and more confused. But now, with the maximum sin she just committed towards him, there was almost no way when, the truth be out, for her to be accepted anymore in the tribe. She would bring shame on her family, something that she swore she would never do – yet alone bringing him back. All of her actions concluded at this very moment, seeing that window where light would never shine through again. Guess my punishment starts now.
The guilt in her double, triple, she felt the night physically pressing her shoulder. Stormfly, sensing her friend distress, tried to muzzle her but Astrid just batted the gesture away apologetically. The blond girl opened the door to her hut, before just laying down in her bed, letting out a few soft sobs from time to time. A few moments later, a soft knock resonated on her door, followed by a gentle voice that belonged to her mother.
"Darling? Are you back? What's going on?" The middle-age Viking women, upon not receiving different answers than a muffled sob, added "I'm coming in" before opening the door.
Seeing her daughter, face down into her pillow, body shaking from time to time. Ava Hofferson sat down on the bed and hugged her daughter closed.
"Shh, "She whispered, stroking Astrid's head. "Do you want to tell me what happened? "she asked gently.
An almost inaudible "No" came up of Astrid's lips, but it reached her mother's ear nonetheless.
"Alright, dear, you can talk to me, if you want, in the morning." She said while removing Astrid's shoulder pad before untying her braid, meanwhile wondering deeply inside what could have happened to change her fierce Astrid to this. Her finger trailed over the naked skin of her daughter's neck, and her eyes widened in surprise at the missing accessory. Reserving any judgment for a later time – she will need Astrid's part of the story- she gently tucked the cover over her before saying. "Rest well, dear" before placing a gently on her scalp and walking out. Outside, she said to her husband: "Later, she needs rest." The blond Viking nodded and went back to his room, not before glancing one last time at the door his wife just exited.
But for Astrid, the night wasn't peaceful. She dreamt about a pair a bright, forest green eyes in the distance, slowly approaching, with each step, another part of the body appeared, started from the legs, one normal, one prosthetic. Then the lower body, before the torso, all covered in black armor. The more the figured appeared, the more horrifying it became, and the more Astrid wanted to turn and ran away, but she couldn't, looking down, her feet were trapped into the ground. The hands then appeared, one empty, the other holding a rusty, kitchen knife. Powerless, she watched the handsome face the one that she fell in love with materialized around those green eyes that never ceased to hypnotize her. But this time, they shined no magic, only sorrow. Emotionless, he stood in front of her. Looking up-he wasn't much taller than Astrid, but she felt let that he was towering her- she found out that Hiccup looked older, weaker, battered. As much as she wanted to move her arms to hug him, to plead for his forgiveness, to say her apology a thousand times if she had to. But her arms remained silent and her throat remained still.
"I remember that you said do leave emotions out of the battlefield, you even scowled at me to make the right decision, even if it meant to leave you behind." Hiccup said, but the voice wasn't that joyful, slightly nasal voice that she was used to. It was like someone cut out the words from his tired throat.
"But let's not talk about what happened back on the Lures. Let's talk about what happened here, on Berk." Hiccup continued. "As busy as I was, being Chief by myself, supervising the whole reconstruction of the village, dealing with paperwork from all over the archipelago, negotiating treaties and trade-route, trying to keep my house clean and such, something you could have helped me by, I still find time to be here for you. I tried to be more than just your boyfriend, but each time you refused to take it further, so I waited. Whatever. I just want to ask you one question, because I saw you wanted to run away, once more, right now, and it's only when you find out that you couldn't that you became apologetic. So, Astrid, Why? Why are you trying to get away from me?"
Astrid wanted to yell out the answer, but find out that she still couldn't make a sound.
"Well, I guess I'm not even worthy of an answer." The broken look in Hiccup's eyes tore her heart, but she could only widen her eyes. "I was expecting this day to come, the day you finally realized that I nothing more than a Hiccup, something useless. Of course, someone like you deserves way better, but you couldn't do much without bringing down your honor. So, Astrid, be free, be free from me." On these words, under her horrified eyes, Hiccup raised that rusty knife and slashed his throats. Gushes and gushes of blood spilled over her but didn't stain her like Hiccup was really meaningless to her. "Why? Astrid? What did I do wrong?" these words accompanied the last drops of blood, exiting the auburn Viking's throat.
"Because I was scared." Astrid jumped straight up on her bed, pain wracking through her body. It wasn't physical pain, it was much deeper like her very being was being shredded to pieces, slowly. Said pain was accompanied by sadness, the same feeling when she believed that Stormfly was dying from the Slighter Wing's venom, only this time, it was much stronger. She heard the door to her room opened, her mother's head poking through the interstice.
"Can I come in?" She asked softly. Astrid nodded slowly. Ava sat down on the bed and gently enveloped her daughter.
"What were you scared of?" she added.
It was at this moment that Astrid realized that she had shouted her answer. Burying her face into her mother's chest, she said everything, starting from how she more or less cold blanked Hiccup because she was scared of her chieftess duty, to everything that happened on the Lures, alternating it with dry sobs as she exhausted her last tears. Nevertheless, she omitted that Blood debt that she saw in her family legacy records, and the cardinal sin she committed. The former because she wasn't sure and didn't want to believe that it could be true, the latter because, she hated to admit, but was scared of the repercussions.
"I feel so weak mom." After Astrid concluded her story, she added "and I am scared to tell the whole island that Hiccup sacrificed himself because of me. Why I am scared? Aren't we Hoffersons supposed to be fearless?"
"Astrid, fearless not necessarily means to have no fear. Everyone has fear, because its what it makes us, well us, living, breathing being, it makes us people." Ava answered in a soft, comforting voice.
"But Uncle Finn didn't have fears. Hiccup also didn't seem to have."
Ava chuckled gently. "Stupid child, I know for a fact that the Haddock's boy does have fear. I remember when he came back to Berk when you six were on that Dragon's Edge Island, and he came to ask us permission to give you the betrothal gift. And, Odin's love, he was mortified. So, dear, being fearless it is not about having no fear, it is having enough strength to face it." Ava concluded by arranging slightly her daughter's hair.
"Right, but I still don't know how to tell the council that their chief is gone because of me."
"Don't, you just tell them what happened, and face your fear. They won't do anything because everyone knows how deep you two are in love, and would know it was Hiccup's choice."
"Right," Astrid replied uneasily.
"Now, go back to sleep dear, tomorrow is a big day," Ava said while getting up and tucked Astrid in bed again. A soft smile drew on the young Viking girl's lisp, content of being cared for like this again. As her mother was about to cross the door, Astrid suddenly asked.
"Mom's, where is Valka?"
Ava immediately noticed the uneasiness laced with her daughter's voice. How do you tell a mother, which has been separated from her son for twenty winters, that her son was gone because of you? But the Viking women, believing that her daughter would overcome this fear as well, answered like it was a normal question.
"Out of Berk for some errand, I believe she would come back in quite a few days."
The next morning, she gathered the rest of the rider and told them to meet her in the Great hall in the council room. After, she went to Gobber and told the blacksmith to gather the members of the council. When everyone has arrived, the members of the council, mainly composed of Gobber, Spitelout, Mulch, Bucket, and the head of Thorston, Ingerman, and Hoffersons-her father- household took their seat and eyed the young Vikings with an inquisitive glare.
"I have something important to tell you." Astrid debuted.
"I'll guess your secret mission didn't go well" The blacksmith interrupted. He was one of the few that actually knew about Hiccup's plan.
"Wait, what secret mission, how didn't I know about it" Spitelout spoke out.
"If you didn't bludgeon yourself unconscious, maybe Hiccup will have told you. "Gobber retorted.
"Speaking of which, where is he?" The ex-general asked.
The question put the room in heavy silence, and all the riders looked down. After some time, Astrid swallowed hard and spoke
"It's a long story, so I will start from the very beginning. Fishleg?"
The husky Viking nodded, before laying heavily and the table the notes and every piece of information, including the book of herbs and gestured the members to start looking through.
Over the course of the morning, the riders retold everything, from when Hiccup first came back wounded with the Headless banner, to his plan of putting on the first line of defense on an island outside of Berk, to finally, his capture.
"Can we see the banner?" Gobber asked?
Snotlout pulled out the ripped piece of sail and showed them. The older Vikings let out a collective gasp.
"Seems familiar," Mulch said, taking a good look at the crest.
"Yeah, just like what the tales told," Gobber added, before pushing the cloth to Astrid's father.
The blond Viking scrutinized the crest of an uncomfortably long period of time, making Astrid's heart clench inwardly. Could her father recognize the same pattern from the sail and her family's archive?
" I will need to check something in my archives, but I'm pretty much sure this is the Headless crest."
Astrid cringed at these words; her father saw this pattern in her family's archive too? Then that means, NO, it can be she refused to think about.
"Then they really are back," Spitelout said out loud what every council member was thinking. "Then we need a plan, and quick, to how to defend Berk."
"There won't be a need for that." Astrid replied, "When Hiccup was captured, it was actually a deal, our safety, and Berk's for his loyalty."
"His loyalty?" Fishleg's father questioned, "How?"
"They force him to swear, as the chief of Berk, a blood oath, I think." This time, Fishleg intervened.
"Hmm, I heard about this," the older Ingerman, said, stroking his beard pensively. "I'll have a look in our archives too."
"But first," the ex-general asked, "Who would be in charge for now, with Hiccup's gone?"
The members exchanged knowing glances and nods between them, to finally rest their eyes on the elder Hofferson. On the receiving end of the gazed, he took a deep breath before saying.
"Astrid, you have been decided acting chief for now."
The sentence was simple, but what it carried was not, striking Astrid like lightning. Mouth slightly agape, she asked.
"Me? Why? There wasn't even a vote."
"Well, you are Hiccup's betrothed, and from what we know, you still are and your relationship is going strong. Plus, you are is second in command, which makes you, de facto, the second in the line of command."
"But if I can't, who's the third?" She asked, trying to find a way out. If it wasn't someone totally incompetent, she would try and relegate the role.
"The general, which is still you."
This comment struck her even more than the news of her being chosen as acting chief. She was imprisoned.
How, after everything I've done? How? Right they don't know. Because I am afraid of them knowing! Astrid screamed inwardly. Forcing back tears, she wanted to be strong, because the village needed her, but this time, she couldn't, as the source of her strength is now what made her so weak.
"I…, I can't" she muttered before storming out.
The council was surprised by her reaction, they had never seen Astrid act like this. Her father, worry on his face, wanted to go after his daughter. But was pulled back Gobber.
"Give the lass some time" The Blacksmith, "She loss more than a chief."
The OOC about Astrid and Hiccup was calculated, I just hope I'm good enough at math
